Looking for Buddies - LT High dose Xanax direct taper 1/2 way there!

[[to...]]

Hi all,

Doctor visit went really well and my new doctor is going to help me with my taper. He was quite understanding and couldn't get over how my past doctor's have treated me. Like the cold turkey I was put on 4 years ago that made me so sick that I had to be put on Xanax to stabilize.

Anyway, I'm still not feeling that well today but a little better than the last few days.

Take care everyone and Happy New year to you all. I'm looking forward to 2020 being the year I'll be off Xanax and continue to heal.

I hope we all are able to do the same.

Love,

Julia

[[Lo...]]

Hello all!  I see this thread didn't really stand the test of a move.  I'm note even sure where the other one went (can't even remember the name of it).  I'm assuming that nobody is posting there.  I have to be honest.... I saw that coming a mile away.  Sometimes you just shouldn't try to fix something that isn't broken.  End of rant! 

 

 

Hope all are doing well!  I took a break for two months and am so happy that I did.  I honestly didn't realize just how bad I had been until the slight updose and hold.  Looking back, my taper probably didn't have to be as horrific as it was and I could have been far more functional last year if I had just slowed down.  I can't get the missed trip to Europe to see my son back, the months spent on a sofa or bed, the decline of my health, etc.  It makes me sad to look back at all I've missed but I can't change that. 

 

Currently, I'm slammed with the flu.  Ugh!  I feel like it's last New Years all over again.  Hopefully this will pass within the week and I will begin my microtaper. 

 

Pearl, I did try the liquid one day last week and really didn't have a problem with it so I'll be doing the 1% reductions per day once I'm over this crappy flu!  I'm wondering if you're finished yet???

 

Okay, would love to write more but I'm coughing my head off! 

 

Hope to check back in at some point .... although I might just be better off PM'ing Pearl and Julia at this point. 

 

Hope all are well

 

Fondly,

Lori

[[to...]]

Hi Lori,

Sorry to hear you are under the weather.  I hope that flu has left you!!!  Hope to catch up soon.

 

Hi PowerPearl - how are you doing?  Looks like you are getting closer and closer - or maybe even off of this poison?  Keep us posted.

 

Thinking of you both.

 

Hope everyone is doing well!

 

Love and hugs,

Julia

[[Po...]]

Hi Lori and Julia!

 

Lori- are you feeling better now.  I know it took me a while to get on here so I am hoping the flu is gone.

 

Julia - how are you?  I am doing good.  If all goes well I will be done on Tuesday. I am currently at .012mg and reducing at .005mg a day.  So yesterday I eliminated my 4:30pm .005mg dose and today I eliminated my 11.30 am .005mg dose.  Tomorrow I will eliminate my nighttime dose and Tuesday I will take my final morning dose of .005mg.  You would think with at doses that small I wouldn't feel anything, but I do.  Its not a big deal, but it is slightly uncomfortable. In fact I would say that going from .125mg to .0625mg was one of the hardest parts of my taper.  Every decrease brought on lots of crying and anxiety.  I feel like the Xanax finally released its death grip on my brain after .0625mg.  I probably could have jumped from there but I was too scared.  I also had the ability to go much much lower since I am using compounded liquid so I decided it was silly not to take it all the way down. 

 

I am actually feeling better than I have in a long time in terms of motivation.  I started working out again after an 8 month break.  I am looking for jobs (I've been a stay at home mom for 7 years).  I am anticipating everything will go very smoothly.

 

Please fill me in how you guys are doing. I couldn't have done this without you two.  I appreciate you both so much.  I am cheering you on from behind my computer screen and sending you virtual hugs.

 

Pearl

[[to...]]

Hi Lori and Julia!

 

Lori- are you feeling better now.  I know it took me a while to get on here so I am hoping the flu is gone.

 

Julia - how are you?  I am doing good.  If all goes well I will be done on Tuesday. I am currently at .012mg and reducing at .005mg a day.  So yesterday I eliminated my 4:30pm .005mg dose and today I eliminated my 11.30 am .005mg dose.  Tomorrow I will eliminate my nighttime dose and Tuesday I will take my final morning dose of .005mg.  You would think with at doses that small I wouldn't feel anything, but I do.  Its not a big deal, but it is slightly uncomfortable. In fact I would say that going from .125mg to .0625mg was one of the hardest parts of my taper.  Every decrease brought on lots of crying and anxiety.  I feel like the Xanax finally released its death grip on my brain after .0625mg.  I probably could have jumped from there but I was too scared.  I also had the ability to go much much lower since I am using compounded liquid so I decided it was silly not to take it all the way down. 

 

I am actually feeling better than I have in a long time in terms of motivation.  I started working out again after an 8 month break.  I am looking for jobs (I've been a stay at home mom for 7 years).  I am anticipating everything will go very smoothly.

 

Please fill me in how you guys are doing. I couldn't have done this without you two.  I appreciate you both so much.  I am cheering you on from behind my computer screen and sending you virtual hugs.

 

Pearl

 

Hi PowerPearl,  I am so proud and happy for you!!!  Sounds like a great plan.  I can relate to going to smaller cuts and still feeling it.  Please fill me in how you guys are doing. I couldn't have done this without you two.  I appreciate you both so much.  I am cheering you on from behind my computer screen and sending you virtual hugs.   The same goes to you!!  You have been so helpful and encouraging.  I am cheering you on and sending you hugs too!!! 

 

The problem I am having today is :

Lori, PowerPearl and anyone who can help:

 

I have a question for you and anyone else that may have an answer.  I have been taking pink Greenstone .5 mg's and have been cutting them in half to get .25's and cutting the .25 mg's in half to get to .125 mg's.  My new doctor prescribed the .25 mg's and they are white but still Greenstone.  Today I started taking them.  I am doing a cut today and this is what I will be doing:

1.375

.50 pink and .125 white  (normal amount )

.25 white

.25 white  (cutting .125, was taking .375)

.25 white

 

After I took my first dose this morning, within an hour or so I started feeling bad.  I have been shaky, stomach hurts and just do not feel well.  I took my second dose close to noon and it was .25.  My face is a little puffy and my tongue does not feel right.  Could this new dose pill from the same manufacturer have this kind of effect so fast?  I am wondering too if because when my husband was cutting the .50 mg's if the dose was so off that now that I am getting the real dose if this is doing this to me.  What do you think?  I am a little anxious about this and do not know if I should keep takng the white pills or go back to cutting the .50mg's.  I am thinking about calling express scripts, where I get my meds from, and ask a pharmacists.  This really sucks because I am planning on making my cut from my 3rd dose of the day and if I am feeling this bad already, I do not know if I should make a cut today or wait to get used to these new pills or change back to the pink ones.

 

Any help would be appreciated.

 

Thanks.

 

Julia

Modify message

 

[[Po...]]

Julia,

 

Can you stabilize on the new pills before you make a cut?

 

Like you said it is possible that the .5s cut in quarters was not giving you the correct .125 dose. It could have been giving you more so just by changing to the white pills you are also making a cut.

 

That being said it makes me nervous that your face is puffy and your tongue doesn’t feel right. That makes me think of an allergic reaction. But I just don’t know what you could be allergic to considering it’s the same manufacturer.

 

If it were me I wouldn’t cut today and I’d wait until it’s straightened out.

[[to...]]

Julia,

 

Can you stabilize on the new pills before you make a cut?

 

Like you said it is possible that the .5s cut in quarters was not giving you the correct .125 dose. It could have been giving you more so just by changing to the white pills you are also making a cut.

 

That being said it makes me nervous that your face is puffy and your tongue doesn’t feel right. That makes me think of an allergic reaction. But I just don’t know what you could be allergic to considering it’s the same manufacturer.

 

If it were me I wouldn’t cut today and I’d wait until it’s straightened out.

 

Hi PowerPearl,

Thanks for replying.  I am definitely not doing the cut today.  I did not think about it but you are so right that since the .5s being cut may not have been correct dosing, the white pills are and that could be a cut by itself. 

 

I talked to the pharmacist and she said to stop taking the white pills for the rest of the day and see if my symptoms go away.  If they do, its the pills.  We will see.  Also, there is 1 less ingredients in the white so they are the same ingredients except they are different colors.  The one missing ingredient is the one that gives the peach pills their color.  The pharmacist looked it up.

 

Since the doctor cold turkeyed me 3 or so years ago,  my brain thinks I am allergic to something and I DO have a reaction even if I am not really allergic to something.  It is SO crazy.  Another reason I want off these pills.

I took a benadryl and I am able to swallow, drink and eat so I think I will be ok.  for safe measure, I am going to use the pink broken pills today and see what I feel like later and tomorrow morning.

 

My face has stopped puffing and I think my throat is a little better.....  Could also be anxiety about changing doses and pills too. I just do not know.  This is the insanity of Xanax for me!!!

 

Love and hugs,

Julia

[[to...]]

Hi PowerPearl,

Wanted to let you know I am better today but I took the peach pills for the rest of the day yesterday and felt better.  Today I am better but not 100% so I am using the peach ones today too.  I feel I need to get back to feeling right before I take any more of the white pills and like you said, get used to them before making another cut.

 

thanks for being here.  How are you doing?  Sounds like you are so close to the end of this taper.  I am so happy for you and will be so happy when I am where you are!

 

Tale care!

Love,

Julia

[[Mi...]]

It's nice to hear your stories of progress. I am beginning a micro taper off 3mg xanax daily. I hope to be done in 10 months. I have a great family and need to stay employed through this. Wish me luck, any support is appreciated.

[[Po...]]

 

 

Miles! Awesome job deciding to taper off your xanax.  Have you started yet?  If so how is it going? If you go to your profile you can change your signature and update your progress.  It helps other buddies respond to your posts as they have more of an idea of what's going on. 

 

Julia!  I am so happy you are doing better. I wonder what is going on with those white pills.  Are you going to go back to them or move forward without them?

 

Lori! Hope you are doing well!

 

Everyone!  I am done with my taper.  I am free.  This is my 2nd day without Xanax since 2011.  I didn't sleep great last night but otherwise I am doing fine.  I wonder if its out of my system yet? 

 

Hope everyone has a great day,

Pearl

[[to...]]

Hi PowerPearl - Congratulations!!!!  I am SO HAPPY for you!!!!  Another success story!  I love this!  I know you will continue to get better and go on with your life without it being poisoned by Xanax.  Please continue to keep us updated!

 

Thank you for your encouragement and kindness.  I am better and I have no idea what is going on with the white pills but Lori had let me know they could be an issue and she was right.  Right now I am just taking the pills I have been taking and going to wait until Sunday, which the day I fill my pill box, and decide then how to proceed.  I have a strong feeling I will be staying with the ones I know do not cause me issues and then make a cut.  At some point I will have to try them again.  I am thinking just use one of them a day for a week and then see how I do, if I do ok, the next week use 2 and so on.  Maybe that will be better.  Regardless I am going to continue with my taper so I can, like you, be off this drug.

 

 

Best wishes to everyone here working so hard to get off this drug.

 

Love and hugs,

Julia

[[Lo...]]

Pearl, you did it!!!! Woo-hoo! I'm beyond elated for you! What a long journey but you stuck with it... endured a few bumps and adjustments, and essentially "beat the beast!" Words can't describe how happy I am for you! Please keep us posted on how you're doing👍🏼💕😁

 

Julia and all, sorry that I went off the grid. I needed a break. Between the flu, updose, and family issues, I needed to regroup. I'm back on the taper bandwagon. As I've mentioned in previous posts, my decision in August to start dosing only 3 times per day while still at .75 mg was a huge mistake! I was essentially putting myself in a constant state of interdose withdrawal and I didn't even realize what I had done. And to boot, I kept tapering like that. I can't even begin to tell you how bad September and October were.  My symptoms were straight out of a reading from someone who had done a cold turkey. Once I updosed and stabilized I was beyond frustrated over the time lost. But, in hindsight, I truly enjoyed the holidays and I got through some rough times as well. Never symptom free, but tolerable.

 

Now I'm back in the saddle. Hopping to get off this last milligram soon.... but slowly! In a way, I think my poor body needed the rest. This has been a 2+ year process for me. However, unlike many, I've been on this stuff for 21 long years! I think my body might be far more dependent. Who knows!

 

Hope all are doing well!!  Miss everyone!

 

Love,

Lori

[[to...]]

Pearl, you did it!!!! Woo-hoo! I'm beyond elated for you! What a long journey but you stuck with it... endured a few bumps and adjustments, and essentially "beat the beast!" Words can't describe how happy I am for you! Please keep us posted on how you're doing👍🏼💕😁

 

Julia and all, sorry that I went off the grid. I needed a break. Between the flu, updose, and family issues, I needed to regroup. I'm back on the taper bandwagon. As I've mentioned in previous posts, my decision in August to start dosing only 3 times per day while still at .75 mg was a huge mistake! I was essentially putting myself in a constant state of interdose withdrawal and I didn't even realize what I had done. And to boot, I kept tapering like that. I can't even begin to tell you how bad September and October were.  My symptoms were straight out of a reading from someone who had done a cold turkey. Once I updosed and stabilized I was beyond frustrated over the time lost. But, in hindsight, I truly enjoyed the holidays and I got through some rough times as well. Never symptom free, but tolerable.

 

Now I'm back in the saddle. Hopping to get off this last milligram soon.... but slowly! In a way, I think my poor body needed the rest. This has been a 2+ year process for me. However, unlike many, I've been on this stuff for 21 long years! I think my body might be far more dependent. Who knows!

 

Hope all are doing well!!  Miss everyone!

 

Love,

Lori

 

Hey PowerPearl - how is it going?  Great I hope!!!  I am sure you are doing well as you have already done the hardest part - getting the drug out of your system in the right way!

 

Lori - Hey ladybug - so glad you are doing ok.  I have missed you and thought about you every day.  I made another cut today so I am now at 1.25 mg.    I am just taking this one day at a time and I am hoping soon I will be Xanax free.  Again, slowly but surely.  Let me know how you are doing.

 

Take care to all - I hope everyone is doing well.

 

Love and hugs,

Julia :smitten:

[[Bl...]]

Hello everyone.  I'm not sure if I qualify completely for this thread because my daily starting dose was only. .75 + prn.  But I dosed 4 x daily for 21 years. 

 

I've been encouraged by all your stories here;  Lori, Pearl, Julia, and others. 

 

So far my taper is going well with relatively mild discomfort.  I reached a milestone last night reaching the 1/2 point.  Plus I've reduced to 3 times daily (.125 3 x daily now).  I've been doing a dry taper and holding 2 weeks, but I'll hold this one a little longer to adjust to 3 times a day. 

 

I've had ME/CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) for over 30 years, so that's a real challenge.  But I'm thankful that so far, the wd sx's haven't been too much to handle.  - Fingers crossed.

 

I like the positive encouragement here. 

 

Best wishes to you all.

 

 

 

 

[[to...]]

Hello everyone.  I'm not sure if I qualify completely for this thread because my daily starting dose was only. .75 + prn.  But I dosed 4 x daily for 21 years. 

 

I've been encouraged by all your stories here;  Lori, Pearl, Julia, and others. 

 

So far my taper is going well with relatively mild discomfort.  I reached a milestone last night reaching the 1/2 point.  Plus I've reduced to 3 times daily (.125 3 x daily now).  I've been doing a dry taper and holding 2 weeks, but I'll hold this one a little longer to adjust to 3 times a day. 

 

I've had ME/CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) for over 30 years, so that's a real challenge.  But I'm thankful that so far, the wd sx's haven't been too much to handle.  - Fingers crossed.

 

I like the positive encouragement here. 

 

Best wishes to you all.

 

Hi BlessedHope,

You are very welcome to be on this thread.  It does not matter the amount you have been taking, you have been on this drug for a LONG time.  We are glad you are here and we are always here to encourage and support you with this.  Making it half way is awesome.  It looks like you are doing well with your taper.

 

I will say that, Lori will chime in, I hope, that when she went to 3 doses a day, it was very hard and she ended up going back to 4 doses a day.  At 1.25 mg right now a day, I take in 4 doses and that works best for me.  I do not want any interdose withdrawal.  You may want to stay at 4 doses a day to keep the meds in your system in a consistent dose but it is totally up to you how you do this.  It was a nightmare for Lori but you could be different.  What works for one may not work for another and vice versa.

 

I am sorry to hear you are dealing with  ME/CFS .  I am sure that is difficult. 

 

I would encourage you to keep going slow and steady and if you start to have W/D symptoms, slow down.

 

We are here for you and are happy you are doing well.

 

Keep us updated.

 

Julia

 

[[Bl...]]

Hi Julia. Thank you for the warm welcome and encouragement . 

 

Congratulations on your progress too! You’re well on your way to being done.  Good job! 

 

Yes, I had read Lori’s awful experience reducing to 3 doses daily and I thought long and hard about it. My starting dose was much smaller though and I’ve tapered it really slowly.  Poor Lori probably experienced more trauma coming  from a higher dose and longer taper. 

 

I tapered my middle of the night dose slowly down to .042  before dropping it.  While I was tapering that dose I also gradually moved my other dosing times from  6 to 8 hrs apart so that by the time I dropped the small 4th dose I’d be used to the longer intervals.    So far, it’s been okay with the exception of being a little sketchy between 4-6 am. But otherwise I’m sleeping well and doing ok in the day. Knock on wood!

 

Dr Stuart Shipko typically doses 3x’s daily so I figured since my doses are only -.125

and if I go really slow, hopefully I won’t have a problem.

 

But from here on out I’ll alternate slowly trimming each dose equally till I’m down to crumbs.

I look forward to checking in here to see how everyone is doing.

 

[[to...]]

Hi Julia. Thank you for the warm welcome and encouragement . 

 

Congratulations on your progress too! You’re well on your way to being done.  Good job! 

 

Yes, I had read Lori’s awful experience reducing to 3 doses daily and I thought long and hard about it. My starting dose was much smaller though and I’ve tapered it really slowly.  Poor Lori probably experienced more trauma coming  from a higher dose and longer taper. 

 

I tapered my middle of the night dose slowly down to .042  before dropping it.  While I was tapering that dose I also gradually moved my other dosing times from  6 to 8 hrs apart so that by the time I dropped the small 4th dose I’d be used to the longer intervals.    So far, it’s been okay with the exception of being a little sketchy between 4-6 am. But otherwise I’m sleeping well and doing ok in the day. Knock on wood!

 

Dr Stuart Shipko typically doses 3x’s daily so I figured since my doses are only -.125

and if I go really slow, hopefully I won’t have a problem.

 

But from here on out I’ll alternate slowly trimming each dose equally till I’m down to crumbs.

I look forward to checking in here to see how everyone is doing.

 

Hi BlessedHope - I am glad you are doing so well.  It sounds like you have a good plan.  It also sounds like you have a good idea of how to do this and I think you are doing great.  I will be so glad when I get to where you are and one day, soon, to be off this medication - if you can call it that!!  LOL  I know it helped me but not when taking it daily at 3.5 to 4 mg a day.  It turned on me and made me so ill.  But - since I started my taper, I am alot better and can function and am able to be functional and also to do some things I enjoyed before I was at such a high dose for me.

 

You have to do and try things that work for you.  Lori had such a rough time but again, she had been on a really high dose and coming down to where she is now is awesome! 

 

I hope you and everyone here is having a good day!

 

Take care.

Julia

[[Lo...]]

Hi Miles and BlessedHope!

 

All are welcome here!  Sorry I've been MIA. I truly needed a few months break. It's been a very long road from 6 mgs and I was starting to wonder if I'd ever get off these. I don't want to sound like a broken record so I'll refrain from rehashing my ordeal. Bottom line, if you need to slow down, then by all means do it.

 

I'm back in the saddle... not crazy happy about it but there's really no choice. Still at .9875 mgs and holding for another week but will probably hunker down and move forward as much as my body will allow. People warned me that this last milligram would be tough. They were correct. Nevertheless, the updose and hold truly gave my body and mind the break that it needed. All good!

 

Hope all are doing well! Please stay in touch.

 

Fondly

Lori

[[to...]]

Hi Miles and BlessedHope!

 

All are welcome here!  Sorry I've been MIA. I truly needed a few months break. It's been a very long road from 6 mgs and I was starting to wonder if I'd ever get off these. I don't want to sound like a broken record so I'll refrain from rehashing my ordeal. Bottom line, if you need to slow down, then by all means do it.

 

I'm back in the saddle... not crazy happy about it but there's really no choice. Still at .9875 mgs and holding for another week but will probably hunker down and move forward as much as my body will allow. People warned me that this last milligram would be tough. They were correct. Nevertheless, the updose and hold truly gave my body and mind the break that it needed. All good!

 

Hope all are doing well! Please stay in touch.

 

Fondly

Lori

Hi everyone,

I hope you all are doing good.  Lori - So glad to see you posted.  I hope you are doing good.

 

I WAS doing well but I had the strangest thing happen to me and I am not sure what to make of it.  I have been tapering and did a cut a couple weeks ago and seemed to be doing ok.  I went to the dentist on Monday for my 6 month cleaning and they put me all way back and down with the dentist chair.  I was in that position for probably 45 minutes.  WELL - that afternoon my ears started bothering me, like pressure in my ears, then the next day I ears still felt pressure and were hurting and I started with headaches.  Yesterday my ears were alot better but still bothering me a little.  But - last night, my right hand was totally numb, I was dizzy, could not focus and just felt dizzy and felt bad.  I was quite concerned about all this because I have had this before and the symptoms are stroke like symptoms.  I went to the hospital before and they said it was anxiety.  My husband says its probably from where the spinal fluids went to my head from the dentist chair but I am concerned.  Today I am moving slow and just monitoring myself.  I am anxious but I do believe its from being in that position in the dentist chair and not so much from the taper.  Anyone that has any ideas would be appreciated.  I have never liked being in that position as it makes my head feel funny in an uncomfortable way.  When I go back I will request they do not lay me down so far.

Seeing how this has happened before - but was when I was at around 3.0 mg's, and a couple other times at a little bit of a lower dose, I am trying not to make a big deal out of it but still being cautious.

 

Hope all are doing well.

 

Love,

Julia

[[Bl...]]

Hi Miles and BlessedHope!

 

All are welcome here!  Sorry I've been MIA. I truly needed a few months break. It's been a very long road from 6 mgs and I was starting to wonder if I'd ever get off these. I don't want to sound like a broken record so I'll refrain from rehashing my ordeal. Bottom line, if you need to slow down, then by all means do it.

 

I'm back in the saddle... not crazy happy about it but there's really no choice. Still at .9875 mgs and holding for another week but will probably hunker down and move forward as much as my body will allow. People warned me that this last milligram would be tough. They were correct. Nevertheless, the updose and hold truly gave my body and mind the break that it needed. All good!

 

Hope all are doing well! Please stay in touch.

 

Fondly

Lori

Hi everyone,

I hope you all are doing good.  Lori - So glad to see you posted.  I hope you are doing good.

 

I WAS doing well but I had the strangest thing happen to me and I am not sure what to make of it.  I have been tapering and did a cut a couple weeks ago and seemed to be doing ok.  I went to the dentist on Monday for my 6 month cleaning and they put me all way back and down with the dentist chair.  I was in that position for probably 45 minutes.  WELL - that afternoon my ears started bothering me, like pressure in my ears, then the next day I ears still felt pressure and were hurting and I started with headaches.  Yesterday my ears were alot better but still bothering me a little.  But - last night, my right hand was totally numb, I was dizzy, could not focus and just felt dizzy and felt bad.  I was quite concerned about all this because I have had this before and the symptoms are stroke like symptoms.  I went to the hospital before and they said it was anxiety.  My husband says its probably from where the spinal fluids went to my head from the dentist chair but I am concerned.  Today I am moving slow and just monitoring myself.  I am anxious but I do believe its from being in that position in the dentist chair and not so much from the taper.  Anyone that has any ideas would be appreciated.  I have never liked being in that position as it makes my head feel funny in an uncomfortable way.  When I go back I will request they do not lay me down so far.

Seeing how this has happened before - but was when I was at around 3.0 mg's, and a couple other times at a little bit of a lower dose, I am trying not to make a big deal out of it but still being cautious.

 

Hope all are doing well.

 

Love,

Julia

 

Hi Lori and Julia.   

 

Julia,  I'm glad to hear you're able to get back on board with your taper.  Did you decided to go back to dosing 4 x's daily, or are you still at 3?    I'm in week 2 of doing 3x's daily but it was  pretty rough the first week.  I adjusted my dosing times and things are fine now.  I discovered I can tolerate longer intervals in the waking hours, so I'm dosing at around 4 am when I get up to go to the bathroom,  and then at 1 pm and 9:30 pm.  Wishing you great success!  You've done a fabulous job!

 

Julia, How scary that must be!  Can you call the dentist to ask if this is common?  Or your doctor's office?  I hope you feel better soon - please keep us posted. 

 

 

[[to...]]

Hi all,

I am still having issues.  Actually I am getting worse.  Since I went to the dentist Monday i have had alot of ear pressure, now really bad headaches, I just feel bad and I have been dizzy and my vision is not right.  Sometimes it is hard to focus and then sometimes its ok.  I totally do not understand what is going on but I am concerned about it.  This morning I just feel really bad.  I have been taking naps and trying to feel better.  I have also had to take ibprophen (sp) and it is not really helping.  I do not know if laying back in that dentist chair messed with my brain or if it is from the taper.  I am going to see how I do today and I may have to go to the ER or try to go to the doctor Monday.  My husband has a procedure on Tuesday so I need to get straight by then as I will have to drive him home.

 

Hey Lori - glad you posted.  Glad you are doing good.

 

BlessedHope - hang in there.  Things will get better.  One day at a time.

 

Take care.

Julia

 

 

[[Lo...]]

Julia,

 

I'm so sorry I haven't responded. Dad was back in the hospital and I injured my right shoulder (very difficult to type). I'm going to try to dictate this from my phone.

 

I truly hope that by now you're feeling better.  Obviously, I can't really comment on a medical issue. That being said, if you've had this before then I would tend to think that it's not serious. Unless there's a leak, it really can't be cerebral fluid. My gut tells me that this is most likely anxiety  and please understand that I say that only because it's happened to you on several other occasions. 

 

Please let us know how you're doing. Again, hopefully over the weekend things got better.

 

Sending hugs!

 

Love,

Lori

[[Lo...]]

Checking in on everyone. Very quiet around here. I'm still holding at .9875 and probably will for a bit. Muscle symptoms still present but I'm dealing with it. Sleep has been better.

 

I must admit that the Covid-19 crisis is not helping my taper. Like most of you, I'm almost certain, the pandemic has affected us in various ways. I'm finding that for the first time in over a year, I'm waking with anxiety in the morning. However, I'm well aware that this is a normal reaction and not taper related. We have to keep telling ourselves that many of these anxieties are being felt by everyone and not just those who are tapering Benzos.

 

Today marks a full 14 days since my son came home from college on Amtrak from NYC.  He attended NYU and this was his final semester. We self isolated the entire time.  Yesterday they made the formal announcement of cancellation of graduation. Heartbreaking!

 

As many of my Buddies know, throughout this entire taper (2+ years) my sons graduation was always my "goal"... and it's really moot at this point.

 

Nevertheless, I'm sure that I'll begin micro cuts sometime soon. I'd rather see how this crisis plays out than rush my taper along. Like many, a huge trigger is the idea of being hospitalized and having to worry about a doctor or nurse dosing my Xanax correctly!!  I have zero trust in that one!

 

Hope all are hanging in there!  Sending love and prayers for health to all.

 

Fondly,

Lori

[[Bl...]]

Checking in on everyone. Very quiet around here. I'm still holding at .9875 and probably will for a bit. Muscle symptoms still present but I'm dealing with it. Sleep has been better.

 

I must admit that the Covid-19 crisis is not helping my taper. Like most of you, I'm almost certain, the pandemic has affected us in various ways. I'm finding that for the first time in over a year, I'm waking with anxiety in the morning. However, I'm well aware that this is a normal reaction and not taper related. We have to keep telling ourselves that many of these anxieties are being felt by everyone and not just those who are tapering Benzos.

 

Today marks a full 14 days since my son came home from college on Amtrak from NYC.  He attended NYU and this was his final semester. We self isolated the entire time.  Yesterday they made the formal announcement of cancellation of graduation. Heartbreaking!

 

As many of my Buddies know, throughout this entire taper (2+ years) my sons graduation was always my "goal"... and it's really moot at this point.

 

Nevertheless, I'm sure that I'll begin micro cuts sometime soon. I'd rather see how this crisis plays out than rush my taper along. Like many, a huge trigger is the idea of being hospitalized and having to worry about a doctor or nurse dosing my Xanax correctly!!  I have zero trust in that one!

 

Hope all are hanging in there!  Sending love and prayers for health to all.

 

Fondly,

Lori

 

Hi Lori.  I’m so glad you checked in.  I’m sure sorry about your dear son’s graduation ceremony cancellation. 

I and many others going through Xanax withdrawal share the same concerns about being hospitalized and having our Xanax incorrectly dosed, switched to a different benzo, or not given at all.

 

I’m typing up a list of current medications with a note requesting that in the event of my not being able to speak for myself PLEASE continue my current dose and do NOT substitute with any other benzo.  I have all my medications ready to take with me as well. 

 

I’m holding my dose at .125 3 x daily until this thing passes.  For one, it’s a usual dose that can be administered easily by someone else.  But also, because dose decreases mess with my sleep and nervous system, thus weakening my immune system more and making me more susceptible .  I have ME/CFS and am almost 70 so I’ve got too many risk factors going.

 

You’re absolutely right that the whole world is feeling anxious right now.  We should take advantage of this and see it as a great opportunity to practice learning how to deal with life’s stresses without drugs.  If we happen to be people of faith, now is the perfect time to put that into practice.

 

Stay safe Lori - and thanks for posting.

May the Lord keep us all well.

[[...]]

I'm someone who has been on Xanax for a long time. 14 years. I tried to do a crossover to valium once and got very, very ill. This time, I'm just trying to taper at a  steady pace, however long it takes. Luckily, I am not working. Although, the long term dependence on this drug is partly why I haven't worked. I didn't realize I had hit a wall with the drug. I thought it was just my OCD and panic disorder getting worse. Now that I'm tapering, I see how much damage it has done. But, I'm trying hard now. The withdrawals are very tough to take but they seem to improve a bit after two weeks of a dose cut. Then I get windows and by week four I feel relatively normal. I feel like I still have so far to go. But, I'm trying to practice acceptance. I'm always struggling with how much to cut and how long to hold. My doctor hasn't had many answers. He says to do what I feel is right. But, he is retiring in a few months so I am trying to keep going. If I had to say what the worst side effect is for me, it's the memory loss and brain fog. I often feel like I'm in a dream. With the whole Coronavirus thing, I feel even more that way at the moment. Very surreal. I hope we can all get through this!

 

2 1/2 mgs zanax daily for 14 years.

December 2019 cut 1/2 mg

Jan 2020 cut .25

Feb 20 cut .25

March 22 cut .125

Current dose (I literally can't do the math) Slightly over 1 and .25 per day plus 100 mgs gabapentin