18 - 30 Month Plus Group

[[so...]]

Thank you for the well wishes, Tyler.

 

We are all so sensitive about everything these days and we care deeply for our friends in this battle.  I am improving, albeit at a snail's pace.  I've never heard anyone on this forum state any other "pace" but molasses in winter s-l-o-w.  It's why we are so desperate to hear reassuring success stories from those who have recovered, or any good news, for that matter.

 

I keep telling myself I am NOT going to be interviewed on CNN as "the only person who never healed from benzodiazepines."  I am getting better, even though I get flare ups from eating something I thought was safe, but wasn't, or from everyday stressors that are just normal LIFE events.  Right now, our nerves are trying to get in balance with our brain signals and we must deal with a cascading domino effect of symptoms when something sets us off.

 

I have faith that our nerves are going to end up like titanium rods when this is over and that nothing will come our way that we can't handle. 

 

Love to you all,

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Buddies,

 

May I ask you all a question?  Is it just me who wakes up at 3am every morning with everything firing off all over again from the minute I wake up?  Do some of you wake up peacefully and then, as the day wears on, the symptoms start kicking in?  I'm trying to figure out if there is anything I can do to help myself stop this never ending cycle. 

 

Sofa

[[Lo...]]

Tyler,

 

I believe her functional medicine doctor is Dr. Anup Kanodia in Ohio.  You can google him.  Other than that, you need to do your own research on these tests that are available.  There is a lot of info on the internet.  I am reluctant to refer doctors to anyone on this forum for obvious reasons.  You might think the guy is an idiot, while my friend has been helped by him.  Situations and medical histories of individuals come into play and yield different outcomes.

 

There is no magic bullet to cure withdrawal.  If you are looking for reassurance that benzos do not cause permanent damage, that was the only purpose of my post regarding the test results of my friend. 

 

Sofa

 

Thanks for responding, Sofa.    I see that JJ and Lockie had also requested from you the name of this test after reading your post.

 

This isn't about my looking for a magic bullet nor seeking the name of your friend's doctor, nor seeking a referral of any kind.

 

This is simply about requesting the name of the blood test that determined there was no damage to GABA receptors and neurotransmitters.   

 

I inquire about the test name, because to my knowledge there is no such test. 

 

While I think it is wonderful to offer hope to others, I think we have to be very careful not to go in a direction that might lead

someone to undergo expensive testing that may be inconclusive.     

 

For anyone who may be interested (perhaps Lockie or JJ), here's a well-written article:

 

https://bebrainfit.com/neurotransmitter-testing/

 

"Neurotransmitter Testing:  Is It Effective?  Is There a Better Alternative?"

 

When specifically alluding to a  test and attaching to the test results that there has been no gaba receptor damage and no damage to neurotransmitters, that creates interest. 

 

A thinking person is going to question such a statement.

 

You have written that "situations and medical histories of individuals come into play and yield different outcomes" 

Yield different outcomes in what?

That statement is irrelevant as to whether there is effective/reliable GABA receptor and neurotransmitter testing. 

 

You have dodged the simple question as to the name of this blood test and you have tried to make this about other things.

 

I'm not here to debate whether neurotransmitter testing is effective/reliable or valid.

What I am here to state is that we have to be responsible in the way we put information out on this forum --

we can offer hope without making statements that may lead others to undergo expensive, inconclusive testing.

 

Thanks.

 

Im glad you have resolved the issue. In the future try not to pick apart somebodies post in this particular group as we are all close friends and support each other.

 

Thanks

 

[[Lo...]]

Buddies,

 

May I ask you all a question?  Is it just me who wakes up at 3am every morning with everything firing off all over again from the minute I wake up?  Do some of you wake up peacefully and then, as the day wears on, the symptoms start kicking in?  I'm trying to figure out if there is anything I can do to help myself stop this never ending cycle. 

 

Sofa

 

Hi sofa for me on an "average" day ( not a bad one ) i wake up lethargic and a bit sore these symptoms seem to spike at 10am then gradually lessen throughout the day and afternoons not too bad. Last week has been totally shithouse thou 

[[bc...]]

Yes, sofa.....can certainly relate to that......usually wake up with all sxs blasting.....anxiety/cortisol or what ever it is.....feels the fear, overwhelmed, and all the other horrible emotions.  This happens anytime thru the night.....not necessarily at a specific hour.  Then these sxs continue  thru the morning and all day....usually have tremors and overbreathing with it too.

 

Wish there was something that would get rid of this.....getting tired of waking up in this spiral of sxs.

 

Hoping we get rid of this real soon...........hugs

[[so...]]

Hey buddies,

 

Cooperten is a founding member of this group and, in her last post, she is 98% healed.  Read her most recent post.  3.5 years and she feels pre-benzo, like awakening from a coma.  Healing happens everyone!!!!!!

 

Love, Sofa

[[Si...]]

Hey buddies,

 

Cooperten is a founding member of this group and, in her last post, she is 98% healed.  Read her most recent post.  3.5 years and she feels pre-benzo, like awakening from a coma.  Healing happens everyone!!!!!!

 

Love, Sofa

 

Thanks for letting us know. I'm glad she's doing so well now.

[[so...]]

Thanks Lockie,

 

Love you sweetheart.  You are coming in for your landing, my dear buddy.  It's a bit bumpy, but you get to debark, grab your belongings and head for the beach!  Save us a spot in the cabana with some blue foo foo drinks with pineapples, maraschino cherries and umbrellas! 

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Siggy,

 

We are all going to heal in 2017.  It is our year.  No doubt about it.

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Bcalm,

 

Thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one who wakes up in this shitshow.  My wakeup cortisol pumping calms down after about half an hour now, instead of three hours of misery.  So that's something, right?

 

Also, my days are much easier this week (except for one day of pure hell).  Evenings are not surging like last week.  Calm like before.  Sleep is a little broken still.  Stress intolerance is still challenging, to say the least.  Heart racing has normalized.  All in all, I'm still Humpty Dumpty with some cracks, but you can hardboil me.  Egg salad anyone?

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Nomne3 is healed too!!!!!!  33 months.  It's happening buddies!!!!

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

We may have a little way to go, but healing happens guys.  I'm thrilled!  One by one, we all cross that finish line.  Give or take some wiggle room on either side, we are in the zone!  WOO HOO!  Ugh.  WOO HOOOOOOOO!

 

Sofa

[[ne...]]

Buddies,

 

May I ask you all a question?  Is it just me who wakes up at 3am every morning with everything firing off all over again from the minute I wake up?  Do some of you wake up peacefully and then, as the day wears on, the symptoms start kicking in?  I'm trying to figure out if there is anything I can do to help myself stop this never ending cycle. 

 

Sofa

 

Sofa, no its not just you!  My core symptom has been severe muscle pain and the moment I wake all of my muscles tighten.

Sometimes, if I`m lucky they loosen by evening and the pain eases off just a bit, but it never goes. I can wake at 2am to use the bathroom and the pain is still a bit less ...but come dawn as if by clockwork the whole saga starts again.

 

I think it must be something to do with the cortisol and like you I`ve tried to figure if there`s anything we can do, but I`m at a loss as to what that can be. 

 

 

[[Lo...]]

Thanks Lockie,

 

Love you sweetheart.  You are coming in for your landing, my dear buddy.  It's a bit bumpy, but you get to debark, grab your belongings and head for the beach!  Save us a spot in the cabana with some blue foo foo drinks with pineapples, maraschino cherries and umbrellas! 

 

Sofa

 

Heyah Sofa. On a good day feels like it but this week i was ready to throw in the towel, throw a tantrum and flip the toybox. So goddamn frustrating. Had a better day today , went to work for half a day and got through it ok. Hopefully the next few days follow suit.

 

Glad ur feeling better and great news about the others healing. Seems 3 years is the golden number........... sigh

[[...]]

Hey buddies,

 

Cooperten is a founding member of this group and, in her last post, she is 98% healed.  Read her most recent post.  3.5 years and she feels pre-benzo, like awakening from a coma.  Healing happens everyone!!!!!!

 

Love, Sofa

 

Thanks Sofa, it's so encouraging. It seems impossible for it to happen, but we have to hold on.

 

Does anyone ever feel they are too damaged to know what life used to be like? This thing really is a beast and my health fears (that I never had before) are raging.

 

Kockie you describe it very well, it reassures me to know it's not just me!

[[...]]

Lockie!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[[so...]]

Thanks for your replies everyone.  Your support and friendship mean so much to me.  I had a 3 hour electrical storm in my body this morning.  I just can't keep doing this.  I made huevos rancheros burritos for the community-wide swap meet tomorrow.  That was interesting.

 

Love, Sofa

[[Lo...]]

Hang in there Sofa we are all here for you  .

 

I finally pulled out of this wave yesterday. Went to work half day and on my feet the rest of the day. I pushed it and went out flying race drones with the boys last night. Woke up sore but not in pieces like i thought i would.

 

That last wave was killer. Glad its over

[[jj...]]

Tyler,

 

I believe her functional medicine doctor is Dr. Anup Kanodia in Ohio.  You can google him.  Other than that, you need to do your own research on these tests that are available.  There is a lot of info on the internet.  I am reluctant to refer doctors to anyone on this forum for obvious reasons.  You might think the guy is an idiot, while my friend has been helped by him.  Situations and medical histories of individuals come into play and yield different outcomes.

 

There is no magic bullet to cure withdrawal.  If you are looking for reassurance that benzos do not cause permanent damage, that was the only purpose of my post regarding the test results of my friend. 

 

Sofa

 

Thanks for responding, Sofa.    I see that JJ and Lockie had also requested from you the name of this test after reading your post.

 

This isn't about my looking for a magic bullet nor seeking the name of your friend's doctor, nor seeking a referral of any kind.

 

This is simply about requesting the name of the blood test that determined there was no damage to GABA receptors and neurotransmitters.   

 

I inquire about the test name, because to my knowledge there is no such test. 

 

While I think it is wonderful to offer hope to others, I think we have to be very careful not to go in a direction that might lead

someone to undergo expensive testing that may be inconclusive.     

 

For anyone who may be interested (perhaps Lockie or JJ), here's a well-written article:

 

https://bebrainfit.com/neurotransmitter-testing/

 

"Neurotransmitter Testing:  Is It Effective?  Is There a Better Alternative?"

 

When specifically alluding to a  test and attaching to the test results that there has been no gaba receptor damage and no damage to neurotransmitters, that creates interest. 

 

A thinking person is going to question such a statement.

 

You have written that "situations and medical histories of individuals come into play and yield different outcomes" 

Yield different outcomes in what?

That statement is irrelevant as to whether there is effective/reliable GABA receptor and neurotransmitter testing. 

 

You have dodged the simple question as to the name of this blood test and you have tried to make this about other things.

 

I'm not here to debate whether neurotransmitter testing is effective/reliable or valid.

What I am here to state is that we have to be responsible in the way we put information out on this forum --

we can offer hope without making statements that may lead others to undergo expensive, inconclusive testing.

 

Thanks.

 

Im glad you have resolved the issue. In the future try not to pick apart somebodies post in this particular group as we are all close friends and support each other.

 

Thanks

 

Tyler's point was valid and he made it in a respectful way. I had the exact same concern. It's not pulling someone apart to suggest that they got something wrong, happens all the time. The fact of the matter is that currently there is no test or any means of determining exactly what is happening in protracted withdrawal, if there were, we'd all know about it by now. More than that, neurotransmitters are still not very well understood in anything more than a rudimentary way, they do a lot more than just make neurons fire and what you find in salva or blood doesn't necessarily reflect what's happening in the CNS.

 

Anyway, looks like there's been some improvement for some who post here and that's great news. I've kind of plateaued out for now but I'm not doing any major backsliding so I'll take it. I've had some skin burning come back but it's still pretty tolerable. This all sucks... 

[[li...]]

Hello everyone!

It's 55 months for me off Xanax! Wow that sounds like a long time in months! It's also 4 years 7 months a 7 days! But who is counting? Well, me...

 

I have good days and awful days....the 56 year + brain is still healing I guess...

 

Still glad to be off benzos and antidepressants....

 

Hope all is well for everyone...

This certainly is a very long road to travel....glad not to be alone..

 

Much love and healing....little m

[Guest [Ty...]]

JJ, thanks.

 

Hope you get relief from the skin burning and everybody here gets a break.

 

Best to all, tyler7

 

 

[[Co...]]

Sofa....sorry you got caught up in some chaos. Glad to see that this group is still the respectful, supportive and caring group that Nova Scotia  supported after we got past the 30 month mark. ....Sofa , you wrote me a pm earlier this week. I tried to reply but your pm is blocked. ....

  Thank you for your good wishes...I do feel pretty much done but still kind of moving between 95%-98% ....95% on days when I still have little odds and ends of momentary anxiety . I do feel that my life is back, but I am picking it up with some caution because I have learned not to trust w/d. .....Health fear was my biggest challenge in the last year. I developed pancreatitis  ( not related to w/d I don't think) and had to do an endoscopy/colonoscopy. That fueled the flames of health fear until it was over. I had versed sedation without any problem of set back to my w/d. ...I also got some good psychotherapy  to deal with the the residual impact of w/d a d that has been very helpful.

    If things are still good at the end of summer I will call it done and over and write a Success post.....even though I do feel like someone slowly waking up from a coma and 7 am glad every single day that it is all but behind me.....still just holding my breath slightly and getting back into the land of the living

    I really do believe we all heal, but I think it takes most of us at least 2 years.....it's so hard to keep going but it's really the only choice we have and the windows keep us going, but MERCY ....it's tough

    Take care Sofa......and you are in a great support group here. I couldn't have done it past 6 months without my little band of wonderful buddies.

              coop

[[dr...]]

I'm a week away from three years off and since my last wave I've been running a consistent 80% or so.  I just returned from a trip to NZ with the wife and baby.  It was a hard trip as it wasn't a vacation as we stayed w her family the whole time. I flew 12 hours and was on the go the whole time.  I ate out a lot, went to a rugby match, went on tours of caves(closest to panic there but still nothing close, and most challengedly stayed at my MILs house for a full week   

I also ate total crap (not by choice) and had no issues except for reflux and bloating.  I drank a little caffeine and even tried a bit of wine and stout but just a few sips w food.

I was clear in the head almost every day.  I did suffer from exhaustion a bit along with some head stuff but it was all passing.  I had some symptoms that felt like my old witching hours but they only ramped to about 1/4 of what they used to be.  I also walked more than I have in a long time and got no palps after.  Nothing bad stayed longer than a few hours except my eye pain/processing stuff. Overall, my life is manageable and this is the first time I travelled and enjoyed it at times instead of just surviving each day.

It was a good barometer how much I improved because I was able to remember and compare how much better I felt than my last visit sixteen months ago. 

 

That is all

 

PS-my MIL still wonders why I'm so lazy. 

[[so...]]

Coop,

 

I'm so happy for you.  So very happy for you.  I hope I fixed my PMs.  I've been on this forum for years and I still don't know the ins and outs of how to operate features.  Ugh.

 

I know how you feel about being reluctant to post a success story until you're sure it's completely behind you.  I feel the same way, even though I'm not even close to a success story myself.  I hope my enthusiasm for your progress and sharing your news with our little group wasn't out of line, as it is your story to tell.  It's just that we all grasp onto the slightest glimmers of hope wherever we can find them.

 

God bless you, Coop.  You fought so hard with such grace.  I pray for all of us every day.

 

Love, Sofa

[[so...]]

Drew,

 

Your progress sounds amazing!  Just like your wedding and the birth of your daughter, you push through and succeed in the most challenging of circumstances.  80% is awesome, Drew.  Even your little bumps in the road don't stop you.

 

Love, Sofa