6-12 month thread....

[[Co...]]

Peace...it sound exactly like d/p d/r to me. I get extremely spacey when I have d/r d/p . I forget things ...repeat things and make mistakes just like taking wrong turns. I have often been convinced that I have developed dementia. Then it clears and I am on track. I also have had the sense of not being connected to parts of my body...or all of my body. Like my body is "empty"... and a sense of coolness and water inside my limbs. It will clear Peace...so sorry this is dogging you. ...So glad that the weekend is coming up for you. ...I hope you get some time to get a break from s/x and school....coop

[[li...]]

HI everyone.... just checking all the post... I am so sorry for the suffering going on today. I have been in a window as of 24 hours and still remain in one. I now know that a window is possible even when we have really big stresses in our life. That was my main concern. Since I am dealing with allot of stress I thought that a window would not be possible until they stresses subsides. It is incredible how a window changes your perspective. I have these stresses and any ordinary person would concern themselves with my issues but in a wave they are like PTSD and in a window they are just unpleasant. Imagine that -- stress being just what it should be -- unpleasant! Look there is no doubt that things will get better for all of us. It is also no doubt that there is allot of suffering going on in this thread.

 

Tomorrow is my and Jenney's 12 month aniverstity! I will be traveling to a "retreat" to look deep inside and see what I find. It is a place where people go to find happiness. It is not a religious thing but allot of CBT and self reflection -- questioning believes etc. So if you do not hear much from me I just wanted to say why.

 

Coop, I am so sorry you are feeling bad. I can tell from the 6 months posts however that you are doing so much better. We are going to make it! You have become a dear friend! I sometimes wonder if when we are all healed if we can just fly somewhere and meet each other! We can call it instead of a "class reunion" a "thread convention"!

 

Green, you have been a source of great inspiration and holding together this thread!

 

Mommyr, well what can I say... you are the greatest!

 

Nova, you are simply so awesome. I know that you and I and all are gong to make it out and soon!

 

Jenny, tomorrow is 12 months! Thank you for being there with me during this walk! 

 

Peace, my dear friend. Stay at your job even though you do not wish too. I know how hard it is but a window is the beginning signs of healing.You got one. keep going!

 

HH, thank you so much for your inspirations and coming back and telling us what you are doing. It is also ok to come back and say you need help in a wave too. We are here for each other.

 

Sky, I can tell that you are getting better from where you were months ago.

 

Garton, it ok to feel bad. Do not beat yourself up. Compassion is peace.

 

Mrs, I hope you are doing well. Have not seen you here much. I hope it is because you are feeling great!

 

To everyone else! We are here for each other. God bless and stay close. We will make it through!

 

 

 

Three more things!

 

 

1. I vote for a 9-18 month thread --- that way we get many who are here and the 6 - 9 months will remain with us too.

9 is half of 18

 

2. Jenny and I will be 12 months tomorrow! Do not worry we will not leave this thread

 

3.I think that our threads and group will be very informative for the entire  benzo world as we will more than like witness much healing going on in this thread in the next 6 months.

 

 

Love,

 

Life

[[Co...]]

Peace...it sound exactly like d/p d/r to me. I get extremely spacey when I have d/r d/p . I forget things ...repeat things and make mistakes just like taking wrong turns. I have often been convinced that I have developed dementia. Then it clears and I am on track. I also have had the sense of not being connected to parts of my body...or all of my body. Like my body is "empty"... and a sense of coolness and water inside my limbs. It will clear Peace...so sorry this is dogging you. ...So glad that the weekend is coming up for you. ...I hope you get some time to get a break from s/x and school....coop

[[Co...]]

Life....how smart are you!....a 9-18 month group...sounds perfect to me!...I pass the thread to you ..with great ceremony and celebration for your one year mark!. You would be a perfect ' Keeper of the Thread'....and you were the one who started this trek of hope out of the cave with your very encouraging statement from your addiction specialist. I nominate you to start the next thread for the next leg of our collective healing. ...Will you accept this nomination?...

....Life , I could not be happier for your window. You have suffered long for this break. You sound wonderful. ...Yes, in a window stress is simply every day stress..not the PTSTD we suffer with stress in a wave. I am just joyful for you!. It encourages me so much to see you emerge whole from a 6 week monster of a wave.

....We all love you Life and you have been an unfailing source of positivity and encouragement to all of us.

....yes, it would be such a great thing to all meet in person...what a dream...

....love and big big congratulations to you dear friend...coop

[[wh...]]

Hello Coop, Nova, Green, Mommy, Garton, Peace, Sky and all;

Thank you for your support today it made all the difference.  Baked a pumpkin pie and went for a walk had the fear but did it anyway.

This is a great group; I feel welcome here and supported...

It would be so nice to all meet up one day....can you imagine....we'll be the happiest gathering ever all healed and whole with an understanding of pain and suffering so deep that we will probably all just hug eachother for the first hour....Lol 

I'm picturing it now.  What a great day.  Love you all...thank you so much.

  have a good night everyone.

We should write a book...more and more people are and it will get the word out.  We could do a collaborative work. Hmmmm.

[[Co...]]

I love love Life 's suggestion for a 9-18 month group ...I nominate Life to be the Keeper of the 9-18 Thread for the next leg of our collective healing. He was after all the first beacon of light in this trek of hope through a deep dark cave. It was his sharing of his addiction specialist 's very encouraging reassuring statement that breathed a second wind into my beat up worn out and failing spirit of healing. ...

....Congratulations to Life on getting to one year. I remember him.at month 8 .. hurting a lot...like the rest of us he kept on going..with a lot of tough times and depression but he has been such a source of hope and encouragement....and on his year one BD he has a 24 hour window.....whoohooo Life...we are all right behind you ....coop

[[Co...]]

Jenny.....CONGRATULATIONS! !!...You have seen it through to year one....what an inspiration you are. You have had tough tough times and you held on through hell. ...The next few months should bring good healing. ....You are at the start of that magical promising year 2.....we are following.....shine your light for us....love to you ......coop

[[Co...]]

Lets all have a reunion party in Colorado next year....

[[je...]]

Hi guys! I love you all dearly and would never want to leave this thread, but I think the 9-18 month thread is a great idea and I think life would be perfect! Im planning on writing a 1 year update tomorrow to encourage everyone here. Life, I'm so glad to have walked this path with you, your a true friend. I love your idea of a reunion-- wouldn't it be great to meet everyone? I love all of you, jenny

[[pe...]]

Where will everyone be if there are two threads? I just want to follow the herd. I can barely keep track of my two 'names' let alone two threads. 

 

Peace2

[[Co...]]

I think Life described his thought as everyone who is essentially 6-18 months ( our current group) would just continue on the 9-18 months group....but new buddies ( who are not yet part of the existing group) would have a 6-12 month space to move to after the 1-6 month time frame that would still be small enough to not be overwhelming to keep up with....we would just be moving up to leave a roomier 6-13 month space for new 6-12 monthers....I know I didn't explain that very well...I think that's how I understand it...all of us who are not yet 9 months ( most of us are) would just come along with us....because like Green said...." No one is going to be left behind "....

.....I am happy with whatever we decide as long as we can all stay together. I like it that our group is small enough to allow real friendships to develop. I get lost in the posts sometimes.  It makes sense to me that newbie 6 monthers could start a new 6-12 group.......coop

[[pe...]]

Thanks Coop, I'm not doing such a great job of reading and grasping. Will someone give me a quick pm when the changeover happens. I'm afraid of missing the change and getting lost.

 

Peace2

[[pe...]]

Life and Jenny,

So proud of you and all the days you've logged in this journey. So blessed by your courage and friendship. Happy 1 year benzo free, the first of many!

 

Peace2

[[je...]]

Love you Peace, thank you so much 

[[Co...]]

Peace...I made a mess of that explanation ...and I don't think anything is decided....I think it just came up yesterday and just getting kicked around...I think it could just be out there for awhile and see what the consensus is ....no worries...nothing has changed.....wishing you a better day tomorrow...and a restful night....coop

[[Gr...]]

So after the window this wave feels like a tsunami. I am swimming in dr. Not sure how I'm going to drive myself home from work. Where's my bed? Pull covers over head..... I mean welcome 29 children back from recess.  Ugh.

 

Why do you have so many kids in that class? 

 

Are there any school holidays coming up?

 

Feel better, Peace.

[[Mo...]]

Lets all have a reunion party in Colorado next year....

 

I'm in!!!

[[Gr...]]

 

HAPPY 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY, JENNY AND LIFE!!  :smitten:

 

 

 

 

[[Gr...]]

Sky, Nova, Coop, feel better, guys.  You'd think we'd be better at this by now.

 

Life, have a wonderful retreat, and come back all relaxed and ready to start our new thread

 

Coop, brilliant idea, 9-18 month thread.  I'm feeling like a senior in high school.  Do we ever graduate?

 

Mommy, that product's active ingredient is ashwagandha.  I really do think it helps.  I take it with 200 mg magnesium and 3 mg melatonin 45 minutes before bed.  It's not going to help on really bad nights, nothing will, but it does help.

 

Peace, don't worry about directions, I'll come and pick you up on the way to the thread.

 

If we get out of this nightmare alive, we have a reunion -- I'm in NY.  We could do it here.  Anybody in California?  And we can Skype Sky in.  Or maybe just have it in Italy.  That would be so nice.

 

So when does the thread get launched?

[[Co...]]

I am all in for Italy!!...

[[...]]

Congrats to Life and Jenny!

 

12 months is SO awesome!!

 

Be well!

 

[[pe...]]

I can't remember the last time I was this bad. I'm buzzing so badly I can't sleep. My ears are ringing loudly. I feel nauseous and hot. I can't sleep and that rarely happens. Anxiety and dr through the roof. I might get through the day if I can just sleep a bit. I feel so sick.

[[Co...]]

Ohhhh,  Peace.. that stinks...so sorry you are going through this...founds just like the wave Green and I just crawled through. It all sounds like p/w ...you are in my heart.  Can you take Excedrin?.  its aspirin and tylenol and really helps the body stuff

....Thinking of you Peace ....coop

[[Sk...]]

Coop, brilliant idea, 9-18 month thread.  I'm feeling like a senior in high school.  Do we ever graduate?

 

Ok, I can barely string two words together, so somebody tell me where I have to go, I can't follow two threads , that would be rocket science for me !I will know I have healed when I can do fancy things like that or bounce around the forum !

 

My eye, I am thinking it was the stress and anguish. A few years ago, something unpleasant happened and my eye, a capillary burst. It wasn't so bad but you can tell it's the same thing.

 

Nova, Green, thanks for the advice you gave me.

 

I have a lesson now, will check in later and regroup!

 

Love the idea of a meeting, of course, but then, I am a social creature and not even wd can do a thing about that ! 

 

 

[[ga...]]

Big congrats to all those hitting the one year mark!  Quite an accomplishment and hope things keep moving in the right direction. 

 

Sky...so sorry to hear you're having a rough time.  It's all part of the journey.  I am there with you.  The sleep has been my downfall and has caused the other sxs to surface.  Just muddling through it the best I can.  actually GOT 4 HOURS last night.  That's a positive but still feeling tired now at 5 a.m.

 

In talking with my wife yesterday she suggested that some of this is do to outside stressors and will resolve.  I believe that's part of it.  She also suggested that some of the anxiety and worry may be just me.  I have always been one who was prone to these traits.  Instead of beating myself up and being hard on myself just accept and work on these issues.  I believe she may be right and to constantly looking for these things to disappear is unrealistic.  They may not be sxs of w/d but just who I am.  After all, no one is perfect and life is learning how to cope with issues that bother us day to day.  I just need to find better ways to deal with those things that create anxiety in my life.  I am now reading the book, Stop Thinking Start Living, by Richard Coop.  Many good suggestions for becoming a happier person.  I highly recommend it...I think someone else hear mentioned it awhile back.

 

Wishing everyone a wonderful day ahead!  By the way, I like the 9 to 18 month thread idea.  More than happy to get it started.