How many people HAVE to work while tapering

[[ma...]]

Hi etown and Lisa

 

Recently I have been taking magnesium twice a day and I think it helps. I also tried the vit c but not sure sure about the results. My sleep has only been a problem in the last couple of weeks, but actually feel okay as long as I get a few solid hours. The best thing for me is to stay lying down and just do breathing or gentle stretches to keep the mind/ body fairly relaxed, even if the revved feeling wants you to get up.

Early on in this process I tried everything ! -  I'm trained in natural medicine- various herbs and supplements, B vits,  zinc, remedies etc. but at that point was too messed up to notice any improvements so stopped all but acupuncture and sometimes homeopathy. my feeling is that these drugs work in a highly complex way so agree that its best to try these things when one is off them.

I plan to slow my taper now I'm at 1.5, so I can stabilise a bit and then move on.

Hats of to the workers! You have to be very brave to go through this and  truly heroic to work at the same time!

magga x

[[et...]]

Magga - I am also trained in natural medicine! cool eh? I still take all my regular supplements that I have taken for years but stopped all natural stuff that is supposed to help with symptoms. It takes the power of another drug to offset the power of a drug. Natural stuff is just not powerful enough. I knew that but tried lots of different stuff anyway. It is not good IMO to take anything that affects Gaba. Just prolongs the agony. some people get results for now but I want off this crap as soon as possible. Yeah slow down if you need to becasue being where I was in May and June is not where anyone wants to be. Well, off to work. Have a great day sluggers!

etown

[[lk...]]

Ok....so whats your guys take on the melatonin? I tried it several times during my taper with no results whatsoever....I mean NONE. Didn't help one bit. So the last few nights I have taken a 3mg one (didn't have the 1mg at the store) and either they are all of a sudden helping or Im just having a few good nights. Whats your take on that and should I only take it sometimes??? I don't want to get hooked on that either.

[[Go...]]

Hi Etown, Magga and Lisa and all

 

Today I am back at work after a week and a half off.  I can say that I had some of my worst days off while in Indiana watching my Dad in hospice and a funeral.  The day of the funeral and the day after I flew home were the absolute worst with full body pain and burning.

 

I drove home yesterday and went to work for a few hours and it was much much better.  Today is starting out OK.  I did have some trepidation about it but I am here.  I am hoping that the stress of my Dad dying was causing a lot of my ramp in symptoms but I honestly can't tell.

 

I have meetings tis morning and I hope I can just spend the afternoon in my office.

 

I think the Magnesium has helped me but I am very cautious about other supplements.  I think they hurt my stomach.  I am pretty low now and I think I will try them once I am off.

 

I hope you are all dealing with work OK,

 

Golden

[[et...]]

Lisa - Melatonin traditionally works better for people who are over 50 years. the Pineal gland that manufactures Melatonin is not as efficient as it was when we were young. Some people think of it as a "natural" sleeping pill but works much better as we age.

etown

[[lk...]]

Oh Golden.....I am so sorry about your Dad....Big hugs. I can only imagine that it has ramped up some sx. That would only make sense. Hopefully after a few days you will even out....or at least when your emotions do. Again...so sorry dear.

 

E.....Im 44. It never worked before but seems to be now or its just a fluke. idk....lol

 

Lisa

[[Ro...]]

Roast..........well 6-7 hours is great! Is that all at once or broken? Broken sleep is better then no sleep but it still stinks Good for you getting off the trazadone too. That never worked for me. Made me feel wonky as anything but wouldn't make me sleep. Crazy!

It was broken up.  Was cause the last few nights have been rough and I've been sleeping 2-3 hours a night. .  I'm pretty sure it has something to do with discontinuing Trazodone.  I miss the days when I could fall asleep at 2 am on a friday or saturday night and wake up at noon.  I'm hoping I can get that back, even if it takes a couple of years.

[[lk...]]

Roast..........well 6-7 hours is great! Is that all at once or broken? Broken sleep is better then no sleep but it still stinks Good for you getting off the trazadone too. That never worked for me. Made me feel wonky as anything but wouldn't make me sleep. Crazy!

It was broken up.  Was cause the last few nights have been rough and I've been sleeping 2-3 hours a night. .  I'm pretty sure it has something to do with discontinuing Trazodone.  I miss the days when I could fall asleep at 2 am on a friday or saturday night and wake up at noon.  I'm hoping I can get that back, even if it takes a couple of years.

 

Oh Im sure its definitely attributed to the discontinuance of the trazadone. That means your body should adjust in time. Its just never quick enough tho is it. Sleeplessness is awful. Here's hoping to some great sleep nights in our future!!!

 

Lisa

[[In...]]

Hey folks,

 

I'm just going to say that I do not post as much as i did almost 2 years ago when I joined BB. But occasionally i do post on threads that are not "all about benzos exclusively" as for me "the tale has been told."

 

So this thread had some relevance for me as I do work because I want to, but it's still relevant to the subject. So the other day, BB Magga asked some questions about folks who do work, and I was pretty specific with my answers. And I got no resonse or acknowledgment whatsoever.

 

So this thread doesn't depend on me to keep going and I know that, but I also have read that etown has been concerned about that. So if I'm going to participate, I guess it's going to require a crumb of acknowledgment of fairly decent responses on others parts, especially when they're asking questions.

 

I thought this would something other than a "clubby"group atmosphere, but if it's gonna be, well so be it. There's other threads asking for answers, and I'm not on like I used to be. Just thought I'd bring this up.

 

Intend

[[Go...]]

I actually work in a mental health facility, and am a licensed mental health professional. It's well known that I've had a severe throat condition necessitating the removal of 2 inches of my throat.

 

So, it seems that my vocal impairment and the use of benzos and being in mental health where benzos are prescribed to clients hasn't so far made a big splash. However, I certainly don't run around advertising this usage. And I do have a doctor involved in the Rx, and who is supportive of my taper. She also comments to me that throat spasms may necessitate the continued use of benzos at a lowered dose.

 

But so far I don't have any throat spasms, and I'm just setting realistic goals of dropping my dose and taking this one day at a time. And there are close co-workers who do know that I am tapering. The agency is big, and I don't think I'm the topic of conversation there, at least not now, and I demonstrate competence at my job. So I guess I don't really know who knows what here or if it's anyone's business as I am tapering and have the support of a doctor for the drug and the taper.

 

Any plenty of people in mental health professions have mental health issues (depression, anxiety), as the job itself is stressful. I guess I answered the question.

 

Intend

 

 

Hi intend

 

I have had a lot going on in my life for the last few weeks with my Dad being I'll and passing away so I haven't been on much but I know I value all the in put from this thread.  Working during withdrawal is tough.  It sounds like you have a big challenge with your throat and then potentially having to take benzos to prevent muscle spasm.  I don't know what I would do. 

 

I also do not tell anyone at work about my situation because I just don't think they would understand.  It is better for me to muddle through.  It seems like a mental health facility would be much more accepting but people are people so who knows.

 

I am wishing you the best of luck.  I hope you stick around.

 

Golden

[[In...]]

Golden,

 

Thanks for your response. Yes, it's hard to work during these tapers. Just keeping my cognitive skills going is rough. And the mental health facility would seem to be more accepting, but as I say, I don't really advertise my situation.

 

I know this thread will go on no matter what. I'm not a real joiner even though I've been around awhile. My number of posts shows that. But acknowledgment for answering direct questions specifically is important. I hope others realize that as you do. I think BB overall is kind of "cliquish" and I'm not a cliquey person, but I can feel left out as easily as the next person.

 

So thank you again for your response. I really don't discuss my taper anymore so this one appealed to me in that way. But it's a benzo forum. So for me the main application here on this thread is the taper and benzos affecting work abilities and performance. I hope I can add to that in the future.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

Intend thanks for your honesty. If you read back you will see that I am a team player. The original intent for me to start this thread was experimental because I saw so many people posting at all times of the day and wondered if anyone worked on here. Apparently not because the number of responses was staggeringly low. Anyway this thread sort of evolved into a group of people, some come and go, who are working through this nightmare. I respect anyone that has to go through this but have a special place for those who work and taper. The people that have stuck with this thread have been loyal and honest. We have a tie that binds so to speak. The downside is that sometimes we all get tired from work and other responsibilities and aren't around for a few pages. If you don't read back you miss stuff. This has happened to me before and I had to re-post. This isn't always the reason and there simply is no reason for people's questions to go unanswered. I personally want you on this thread. We are not a clique. Just a bunch of scared people trying to grind through this thing. The other thing I found is that I really only post to a few threads regularily. This is so I can meet and trust people on a more intimate level. You will not intentionally be ignored by me and most others on this thread. Please remain here and I am so sorry that you feel left out. I am going to read back and see where I may have missed something. I have had a horrible May and June so I was asking for help more than giving it. YOU ARE IMPORTANT!

etown

[[In...]]

etown,

 

Thank you for your response also. I am also a team player so to speak, but mainly at my job where this aspect is emphasized incessantly. In my own private life, I have a supportive family who doesn't fully get this process, but who do try. My husband is unfailingly understanding as I do not "suffer" in silence.

 

Others have also commented to me that most of the people on BB did not appear to work, but that a few of us have either chosen to continue out of necessity or desire. I do realize that many who do not are simply not able to do so because their sx are severe as I myself have experienced what felt like disabling and discouraging sx also. It truly has become only by sheer determination that I continue to that retirement age. And I do hope I can make it.

 

I am independent by nature which is one reason I did not start a blog (I was asked why awhile back). And it is only human nature for groups such as BB to start, join, and stay in cliques as there is security there and acceptance. I am not nor have ever been good at this and have generally been the independent one who knew answers to all the political questions. I am not saying that this thread is a clique necessarily, but if it becomes one, life will go on. I definitely think that BB in general has numerous cliques. But having said all this, I will comment here as I can. Believe me, I've been here so long, I definitely know how fast the posting can go, one over the other, easily missing something someone said, and how one may need to go back on threads to just catch up. But with the number of people here as you've described, it would seem each would be able to speak and perhaps get responses to pertinent questions especially. And if someone doesn't want to respond to them or comment, that should be respected. And I can live with that.

 

It was just that my post was so very specific in answers and so ignored, it did surprise me. Well no special treatment needed here. Just common sense and courtesy from an apparently very limited number of thread members.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

Intend - it really sounds like you are up against it where you work. and the other medical stuff and the terrible time you have had with your taper and trying to be there for your husband must be physically and mentally draining. I have had a rough time too the past few months. Things have kind of settled for now ,however, I am really scared about the next round of taper. Once bit you know the drill! I really believe you have a lot to offer this thread and I know I'll be around for a good bit yet so join the notclique!

etown

[[In...]]

etown,

 

Well, at work I am up against it in that I run and set up the schedule for the entire facility starting at 7 am on weekends. And then I do counseling for 10 hours, requiring that my brain be fully engaged with their situations and not mine. Each situation is a real crisis and what I do is called crisis intervention, so it's unpredictable, requires all those skills that I spoke of when I initially joined this thread.

 

And I work closely with law enforcement and homeless and substance abusing populations. And the division of child and family services. So it is highly intense and exhausting.

 

And my taper is very rough, but so are others. My husband has retired with a disability and just had heart surgery although he is relatively young for this. Nevertheless, it has and is demanding. Surely others have similar stresses. I do think my job is the ultimate in many ways, however. Since one does not know what is coming, there is always this backlog of adrenaline waiting to flow. And even that I think is more stressful sometimes than when it must flow to handle a crisis. It leaves one in a state of apprehension and anticipation.

 

I can only say that I am used to it. But its rough in withdrawl. And when I can retire, I will.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

heading off to a meeting interesting post. I will answer when I get back home.

etown

[[...]]

Hi Intend

That sounds tough. I have some stress in my job but probably nothing like you do. Still, I've found I have lighter symptoms on days off such as weekends and vacation time. I use these times to move my taper along and do more holding during the busy times at work.

Bart

[[In...]]

Bart,

 

Yes, it can be tough. It never used to be 10 years ago, but I wasn't tapering then either, and was about 2 years into using Xanax once  a day. Some days are easier than others.

 

At work, we always try to determine cycles of why sometimes are busier than others. But that's gone on for years. Things like school starting, school getting out, holidays and holiday vacations, weekends and everyone home and driving each other crazy, weekends and no one at home and then coming home on Sunday night and driving each other crazy.

 

But it's all of the above plus economic factors, cultural factors, religious factors, everything. I do use the week days as downtime although there's not as much as one might think. It's just life and what was once challenging to me has become a little too stressful for me.

 

I still enjoy it and do a good job, but I've had my moments when I felt like walking out the door. And I've said that to co-workers there. One thing that really gets me is having to structure a micro taper (which should be easier than a dry cut by far) around this work schedule. It keeps me from going a bit faster as I must hold a few days after a cut due to sensitivity. And I can not take chances on being "out of it" at this job.

 

No, being "on it" is paramount.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

Intend believe me I do understand. I am a licenced Paramedic (not practicing) thank god. If I was I don't think I could handle it. You do have a huge mountain to climb every single day. I've done it before and do not how you do it. You deserve a medal and will get one when you get off this crap. Keep chugging my friend. Where are you now with your taper and how much are you tapering? You can PM me if you want. I hope I'm not asking you the same question again. I'm brain dead right now 12 hour day.

etown

[[In...]]

etown,

 

You actually are asking me the same question as before which was a few days ago. I'm micro tapering klonopin at 3 mgs. I'm really "microing it" as my sensitivity is huge. And it's a crossover from Xanax and not to Valium as we discussed.

 

But I've had too many crosses back and forth from X to K 4 times in 6 months which has (I believe) over sensitized my receptors. That and I did my own taper down the Xanax path starting in  fall 2009. Not all the way down; from 2 mgs to 1.25 mg dry cut.

 

Finding a comfortable place to start this micro taper has required some mental gymnastics on my part as levels most would find "ok" have brought me some rough withdrawl.

 

But I may be there at this point, and plan to cut again after this coming weekend. I did not work last weekend as we had a death in the family. And I had just cut so now I must wait till next weekend to cut again as I also have a long lag time. This taper is just going to take awhile. Facts are facts.

 

Don't worry. I totally understand a 12 hour day and being brain dead.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

Sorry for your loss. Like Golden who just lost her Dad you too have so many things to juggle. Also I'm anidiot lol for asking you the same question again. I used to remember everything and now I forget to tie mt shoes. Maybe I'll go out and get the velcro ones lol. I get your taper and it has been a pain for you. I know how it feels. I thought I was at 5mg only to find out I was really at 12mg due to another cross over from a sleeping pill that I was told was not a Benzo but is.....Serax is Oxazapam. Oh well there goes another year of my life or more. wow that puts me in a real festive mood.

etown

[[In...]]

etown,

 

I read the Valium support thread all the time as I believe that very knowledgable people are there posting. I had read of your situation with the Oxazepam.

 

But I have also read that Oxazepam is a metabolite of Valium, and thus crossing over to Valium from it should go smoothly.

 

I do not believe that "a benzo is a benzo is a benzo" as not only does klonopin not fit my brain well, but my doctors secretary tells me many of their patients tell them the same thing re X and K.

 

But in this case, where Oxazepam is a metabolite of Valium, i think it's true. Well, you have to or want to get off the Oxazepam so better that than some other benzo in my book. And all we can domis hope these tapers go well, and tempest fugit.

 

Intend

 

 

[[et...]]

Thanks Intend - I am happy to be off the Serax in many ways and it seems the cross over has gone well. I was a little worried about the equivalency so went with 7mg and so far all is well. The advise I am hearing so far is to hold until I am sure the cross over effects are over before re starting my taper. So... I will hold until the end of July and then away we go again!. I am a little pissed I am back to 12mg but whatever.

etown

[[In...]]

etown,

 

"Pissed off" is probably the "name of the game" for most here. While acceptance of the situation may be key to getting through this, I think many who still have a long ways to go are resentful and frustrated.

 

I've had so much trouble just finding a "comfortable" place to start, that I'm far from any acceptance. If I did adopt that attitude, I think I'd be stupid as I wouldn't be actively working on a sensible taper plan for me, so I'm not accepting didley squat at the moment.

 

I do think I will reach acceptance when that time is appropriate, but I'm sure not gonna just lay down until I find that my plan works for me.

 

I think you got very good advice to hold right now while your body gets completely used to your cross. And when I hear or say myself, "whatever," it means acceptance to me. So you're already ahead and moving along. That's good.

 

Intend

[[et...]]

Yes I have accepted my fate but not sure how it has affectedme either positively or negatively. But what the hay still worked all week acceptance or not.

etown