klonopin addiction 7 years

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I am so used to instant gratification because of my past illicit drug use,I guess i am going to have to learn patience but man i am so miserable,I have to force myself to even take a shower.I am probably going to have to quit smoking even though that is not advised my breathing is pretty bad as is the rest of my body,i spent the night with my sister and 4 nephews over the weekend it helped me get a small window but i feel so disconnected from everyone i feel like i am close to death,my body hurts,i hope and pray that it gets better,i was such a people person,i was so intelligent,i was so healthy at one time,i was such a ladies man now my male organ doesnt even function please tell me it gets better.

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Do you think I will be ok doing a direct taper from klonopin because my doc will not do the valium crossover,I would be so glad to get my life back.

 

Many here do direct tapers, just take it slow and steady. You can do this!!

[[Lo...]]

Hey edro,

I am glad that you were able to spend time with your sister and nephews; I am sure it was good medicine! It was also good to read that your dr. will give you the .5mg pills when you need a refill. I know how easy it is to look back at what you once were/could do. I struggle with this as well. Fortunately, from other people's testimonies on here, we can be positive that we can be that way again. It is just going to take time. I know it is hard to be patient, especially when we don't feel good, but think how much we will appreciate "life" again. I think that once you start tapering (I don't think you are yet are you?), you might feel better. I did. I would get many days were I felt good again. Don't give up hope and try not to focus on medical issues. If you have had tests done and everything came back normal, then be happy and don't think about the "what ifs." I can "what if" just about anything, but am learning that it only causes anxiety and just not worth it! You can do this and get thru this "season" in your life, edro. I read something yesterday that I thought was good...."If Winter comes, can Spring be far behind?" Your Spring is coming....

 

Lori

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Hi edro,

 

Are you stabilized on a certain dose at this point?  No upping or taking extra Klonopin?  Taking it the same time every day?  When are you planning to start your taper program?  You can do this and we are all here for you.

 

Patty  xo

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I have already made a .05 cut,I am currently taking .05 am and 2mg pm,i just hope and pray for freedom I am going to slow the taper down i really feel no difference yet i made a fourth of a one mg cut for 2 weeks then i cut down to 2 and a half mgs saturday i plan on cutting a forth of a .05 when i get the point 5s at the end of the month,i fear that the paxil and klonopin have permanantly messed up my brain.I pray for healing.

[[Le...]]

Hi Edro,

 

I ready your story and I think you are a very strong person to be doing all that you have. You are going to do fine. I just wanted to tell you, I am a big believer in nutrition. It helped me get through a long term fight with Lyme Disease and it is helping me get off Klonopin. Make sure you eat as many good foods as you can when you are tapering. It will help I can assure you! Good Luck!

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Thank you lebon,i just feel so hopeless because my body is not functioning like it should and that freaks me out,i dont know how i am going to handle the actual wd.

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i dont know how i am going to handle the actual wd.

 

Hey edro,

Try to just concentrate on your taper right now. Some people have less symptoms when they are benzo free. Just try to do a slow and steady taper and accept whatever symptoms come. One day, this test can be a testimony; you'll be able to tell us how well your body is functioning again. I know it's easy to worry and get impatient, but take it one day at a time and you won't feel so overwhelmed or hopeless. You can do this, edro. You are a strong person who can beat these benzos!

 

edro fighting the benzos.....

 

Lori

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But, edro, you are tapering and you are handling it thus far.  Listen, many of us just dig deep down and take it minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day.  That is how we get through this.  No, it is not a picnic but it so well worth the journey.  I have been where you are now and life is now great.  Hang on tight.

 

Patty  xo

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I know that i am suffering protracted withdrawal from the paxil that i made a rapid taper off of a year ago on top of the benzo tolerance,i wonder if this will make my klonopin taper worse?I am also worried that i will need help taking a shower and eating when i hit wd from the klonopin i dont know if my parents who are elderly can take care of me or if i will need them to.I just pray that i can heal as completely as possible.Please reply.

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Edro 

 

You are working yourself into a awful state worrying about what may happen in the future.  At least half of the battle is mental/psychological, edro.  If you read the posts of those who are accepting of whatever comes and who do what they can to manage their symptoms through diet, exercise and other techniques, you will see that their attitude is what's making the difference.  Really, try to focus on what you can control and let go of what you can't.  Think of it as developing a new, positive habit.  That's what I do. 

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Hi edro,

 

I really doubt you are experiencing protracted w/d's from Paxil since you have been off for a year.  There are many members on this site that have done a taper without anyone's help.  You have to be very determined and focused to get of the benzos.  You have us for support.  There were many days I didn't shower or eat but I survived.  I took it one day at a time....one day at a time.....one day at a time. 

 

Patty  xo

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paxil withdrawal can last for years just like benzos man my doctor set a pretty good trap on me,paxil can also cause permanent sexual side effects this stinks. :'(

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paxil withdrawal can last for years just like benzos man my doctor set a pretty good trap on me,paxil can also cause permanent sexual side effects this stinks. :'(

 

I've heard the samething about paxil, it's brutal to come off of.  There is a paxil support group if wanted to google it, I've heard good things about it.

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paxil withdrawal can last for years just like benzos man my doctor set a pretty good trap on me,paxil can also cause permanent sexual side effects this stinks. :'(

 

Geez, edro? Are you sure? I have never seen any info stating this? How long did you take Paxil?

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I took paxil for about 8 and one half years ironacally,when i was trying to wd in 2001 that is when my doctor put me on klonopin,but i got back on paxil because klonopin was causing me depression and i didnt even know it,and stupid me cold turkeyed off the paxil of 40mgs about a year ago,it is amazing that i am alive.

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There is tons of stuff on the net regarding paxil wd and protracted paxil wd.

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Hi edro,

 

You have been off of that for one year. You have no way of knowing if that is still causing your problems. You are on a somewhat high dose of klonopin. I'm sure that could cause some of your symptoms. Just stay focused on the task at hand and that is a slow/steady taper off the klonopin. Take one day at a time! Could you please add a signature line?? http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=9432.msg119713#msg119713

 

T2

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I am sorry i have to much brain fog right now theresa ,all of my problems started about a week after i cold turkeyed the paxil about a year ago,but i do know that the klonopin is not helping.

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This last year has been the worst thing to ever happen to me,i have just been riding it out hoping the symptoms would go away,I have just recently made the connection that the benzo is harming me as well,i hope and pray that i have a life left :'(

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This last year has been the worst thing to ever happen to me,i have just been riding it out hoping the symptoms would go away,I have just recently made the connection that the benzo is harming me as well,i hope and pray that i have a life left :'(

 

I know how it feels, edro. I, too, just got through the worst year of my life. I started tapering February last year, got very sick during taper with thyroid problems on top of withdrawals, was not able to visit my dying mother, too sick to go to her funeral. But you know what, I made it, I did a very slow taper (although wanted it over with yesterday) and finished in November. I had some very low times throughout the taper, but I am feeling great now! You will get through this!

 

T2

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This last year has been the worst thing to ever happen to me,i have just been riding it out hoping the symptoms would go away,I have just recently made the connection that the benzo is harming me as well,i hope and pray that i have a life left :'(

 

edro, you do have a life left.....you can't see it right now because of the symptoms and depression.  One reason it's good for you to belong to a forum is that we know where you are and what you have before you...there is a light, and a life, down the road for you. 

 

The hopelessness you are feeling are part of the symptoms, most of us have had them, we feel like life will never be the same, we will never heal, etc...but it's the drugs talking.

 

You are going to heal...

 

TS

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Edro -

 

What you're feeling, the thoughts you're playing through in your mind, the things that you're worrying about - they will all improve in time.

 

You think you might not have a life left, but the truth is that you've only just opened the doors to a new life ahead of you. Like all beginnings, it may start off rocky and you may not have a destination in mind, but the fact of the matter is that this journey is just starting and you'll eventually discover the right path. It takes time, but believe me... life will improve - you just need to find your way.

 

And you will find your way. Of that, there is no doubt.

 

 

 

[[Lo...]]

Hey edro,

I don't know anything about withdrawals from Paxil. I was on Paxil on 2 different occasions and didn't have any problems tapering pretty quickly off of it. But, like with all medications, they affect each of us differently and I would never say that what you are experiencing is or is not from the Paxil. It might be or it might not.  I do know that benzos can wreak havoc on our bodies; you might be in tolerance now and are experiencing withdrawals. Petey wrote so well; don't give up hope for a new life. It's hard not to look at where we are right now and think that it will never get better or change. That's when I remind myself of others on here who ARE doing good post-benzo! Why would it be any different for you and me?? This just takes time and a whole lot of patience. Don't give up, we are all pulling for you and even though it's difficult, it will be worth it in the long run.

 

Lori

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I feel badly physically i have to force myself to even go to the bathroom my weight is 115lbs. and i am 5 ft 8,i am suffering imsomnia many physical ailments,panic,obsessive thinking,headaches,and muscle pain.I have moved in with my parents and my father is on ativan and paxil,anytime i talk to him about my problems he goes off,my mother is a nurse and she works a lot,i know they should be enjoying their golden years and i am bothering them my main support is my sister who lives about 15 minutes away,but she is SUPER religous,i am a christian to but she thinks my problems are demonic which i do think that klonopin is demonic.I have isolated myself from most of my friends,i dont want them to see me like this.Paxil can cause permanant erectile dysfunction which i am now suffering from on top of everything else this worries me,i pray that my whole body heals i want to have a family some day.I am just venting are people able to work after wds?I used to have a good job i hope i can work again,i am also chain smoking i know that it is not recommended to stop smoking during taper but i amgoing to have to.