DEREALISATION and DEPERSONALISATION

[Guest [...]]

Wonderwoman ? I've had ALLOT of head trauma for real how bout you??

[[wo...]]

My brain feels like it is being squeezed like a Dolly Parton's breast at a milking contest!!!!ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

[[wo...]]

Emotional or Impact trauma?

[Guest [...]]

Emotional or Impact trauma?

 

TRAUMA bad blows to head many times!

[Guest [...]]

My brain feels like it is being squeezed like a Dolly Parton's breast at a milking contest!!!!ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

 

:2funny: You crack me up OH Man you are so good at this stuff. 

[[wo...]]

I've had a few mild concussions from my thrill sports...but nothing that took me out for anymore time than 5 days!  No hospitalization just home rest.

[Guest [...]]

WW- Can I shorten you name please?

 

Trauma my friend. Was in a very bad situation at around age 17 and only thing I could move was head. Was a very long battle and smashed head so bad sustained small bleed on brain. Was very serious at the time and had hard time for a very long time afterward. Snowmobile accident around same age crashed and smashed back of head with helmet on but cracked helmet and had concussion. Hit in head around same time by a fellow student with a very large baseball bat sized log, another serious concussion. Birth was traumatic and head injury at that time as well. Many head traumas and yes have had workups after injuries which did show injuries and at least one time small bleed on brain. Hit in head several times over years and many concussions. Lots of stuff WW. What does it mean in terms of this blog and what you and I have for issues??

[Guest [...]]

I've had a few mild concussions from my thrill sports...but nothing that took me out for anymore time than 5 days!  No hospitalization just home rest.

 

Mine were never hospitalized either but same as you and most severe was pretty BAD. When cars would come at us I was sure they were going to hit me. Dizziness for a very long time and ringing in ears. Lots of bad stuff with worst injury, could not stop vomitting and could not walk on my own took a day to get my feet back and stop the vomitting, had major tests done after that one and is when bleed was found. Just had to lay low for a long time, don't remember how long. Was bad, very bad thing that happened.

[[wo...]]

Yeah, sounds familiar,  I had all the tests too each time but never had a bleed. Just felt like crap, the puking, the can't walk, looked like a boxer on the losing end of a fight....that stuff.....but compared to this it was NOTHING....!!!!!

 

Let's move to P.M. so we don't use up this thread.... ya think???????

[Guest [...]]

WW NOBODY IS STOPPING IN. YOU THINK WE ARE ALONE? :'(

[[wo...]]

Nahhhhhhhhh! I don't think we are alone, but maybe I should've put it in GENERAL..?????????????????

[[tr...]]

 

You guys aren't alone    Your thread has been read 145 times so members are reading...You are explaining it so well I think people are reading and agreeing with you but not posting.  I've heard of many people having this but no one has brought it out so well.  Keep up the good work!  Even though the responses aren't here yet you are helping others by posting this....It's very informative.

[[wo...]]

Thanks T.S. I was getting worried I had lizards coming out of my head or something?????.....(hah,hah,hah,)...oh wait I do...(hee,hee,hee!!!)

[Guest [...]]

Thanks MY SOUL we really needed what ya said. Stinks to have this stuff REAL bad don't it WW?

 

HEY WW you got music in your head all the time to? I do and its sometimes so overwhelming I can't concentrate on nothing but music jammin my head.

 

Guys KID can't breath for real right now. CAN YOU SAY PANIC and Depersonalization and have you felt it all at once? I do and it's SO damned scary!

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Hi KID, yes I have the music! But I like that part most of the time!!!!! It is bizarre though. For awhile I could see the notes in colors and I wish sometimes that would come back because I wrote and played great music when that was happening.:):):)

[Guest [...]]

Hi KID, yes I have the music! But I like that part most of the time!!!!! It is bizarre though. For awhile I could see the notes in colors and I wish sometimes that would come back because I wrote and played great music when that was happening.:):):)

 

Every word I hear I find a song out of words and is really hard to concentrate. You understand, when someone talks or writes to me or I write or talk I find music, words from old and new music and I get lost in music and can't focus on nothing else. OK in very serious class while in partial hospital setting at one point in start of benzos the teacher, Psychologist said nothing lasts forever. So you know where my head went right? All we are is dust in the Wind--- That song over and over again in my head. It's this way ALL the time with me. I thought I was insane and therapist told me NO not insane but is dissociation. The word dissociation makes me feel insane all in itself so her telling me this did not make it feel no better at all. Just even more insane.

 

OK WW, where are all the ones reading our special new blog. HEY guys don't be scared just post away.  PLEASE :'(

[[Be...]]

Jan and WW 

 

I'm really glad you started this thread.  I know very little about dp or dr.  I always thought it was a sense of unreality or of being separated from yourself, but I can see it is way more involved than that.  Quite frankly, I can't quite imagine what your days must be like, but your posts here are helping me to do that.  Thanks, gals. 

[[Co...]]

I recall feeling as though I was observing myself when I was withdrawing from benzos. I had absolutely no idea of what was happening, or why. I thought I was going mad! Fortunately, I found someone in the real-world that was able to explain to what was happening and why, and it did correct itself a while after I finished my withdrawal.

[[el...]]

I did have derealization with my klonopin-induced depression. I remember driving around in my car, trying to connect to the beautiful day, the trees, the sky, and I felt like an alien. The world around me felt totally unreal. Very disconcerting.   

[[wo...]]

It is very strange how when this is happening, words and music and music and words just get connected at the drop of a hat!!!! It reminds me of being a happy kid!:)

 

Yes Colin it is like watching yourself and sometimes it feels to me like I'm hearing myself with a very slight echo....kind of like a bad phone connection.

 

Eljay, it's the distance that it puts between me and everyone else that feels scary.....it is alienating!

 

[[Ke...]]

Been away for a little much needed R&R- so trying to catch up a bit.  I had the dr/dp a bit, but it was fleeting for me.  Not sure if this qualifies, but mine was always like I was daydreaming, "there but not there".  Kind of surreal and hard to explain.  Never lasted more than a few minutes, but strange nonetheless. 

 

Keith

[[Je...]]

I had this really bad.  I attributed a lot of it to lack of sleep.  I was always in almost a dream state..fuzzy headed...unable to absorb things going on around me.  It was WEIRD!  Thank God...it went away!

 

Jen

[[ha...]]

There were times while I was still on Klono,before tapering, that I wouldn't get or process what someone would say to me, until the were already mad and left the room. It was almost like slow motion. Kind of hard to explain, only that people would think I wasn't even paying attention.

[[Ma...]]

I remember those terrible days of d/p-d/r when I used to look outta the window through my chemical bubble as people walked passed and I would think to myself, "I wonder if they're normal?". I already discussed this on the phone with Jan....I also remember looking in the mirror and seeing my mother (who I had'nt long lost) looking back at me....

 

I also remember the traffic thing, Jan....I used to think cars would mount the pavement and I would see meself underneath and the blue lights of an ambulance coming...Dreadful...I've been thinking about it a lot today. I prolly have'nt posted here before because it brings back such vivid memories....

 

I aslo went back to my childhood where I was having flashbacks of memories of when I was a little girl. They were all good memories, but very disturbing to experience...It was my brain trying desperately to heal, but the poison was stopping it....I had to go through the long drawn out process of w/d for that to happen.

 

I used to count to ten over and over until it passed. I guess it was a coping mechanism...I was'nt obsessive about it, but I actually used to count on my fingers-1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9, 10.....

 

The good news is, that since I came off the meds, I have'nt experienced any of this. It's the medication to blame. It plays wicked tricks on the brain-on everything......

[Guest [...]]

I remember those terrible days of d/p-d/r when I used to look outta the window through my chemical bubble as people walked passed and I would think to myself, "I wonder if they're normal?". I already discussed this on the phone with Jan....I also remember looking in the mirror and seeing my mother (who I had'nt long lost) looking back at me....

 

I also remember the traffic thing, Jan....I used to think cars would mount the pavement and I would see meself underneath and the blue lights of an ambulance coming...Dreadful...I've been thinking about it a lot today. I prolly have'nt posted here before because it brings back such vivid memories....

 

I aslo went back to my childhood where I was having flashbacks of memories of when I was a little girl. They were all good memories, but very disturbing to experience...It was my brain trying desperately to heal, but the poison was stopping it....I had to go through the long drawn out process of w/d for that to happen.

 

I used to count to ten over and over until it passed. I guess it was a coping mechanism...I was'nt obsessive about it, but I actually used to count on my fingers-1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9, 10.....

 

The good news is, that since I came off the meds, I have'nt experienced any of this. It's the medication to blame. It plays wicked tricks on the brain-on everything......

 

:'( And here would be THE LADY who told me this thread was necessary and if wasn't one already SHE would start it for me. This WonerWoman and all the rest of you kind and loving SOULS who have held my heart, my hand and my painful head along the way is THE ONE, Marnie walked through this with me and she alone showed me the way which in turn lead to WW starting this very important thread.  :'( Tears for many reason guys, tears for pain, tears for sadness, tears for joy in finding all of you and tears owed to my friend who walked with me through the worst moments of time when I have been in this state of mind over the past month she didn't leave me. NOPE she carried me and now look at all the ones who are here with us telling me that I am not insane just as Marnie, Lin, Cathy, Mackie, Joey and so many of you have all along but ONLY now in seeing that you all feel or have felt the same things makes me feel like I really might not be insane at all. YOU do know what a profound thing that is to come to understand right?  :'(

 

Thank you for being open, honest and loving as you ALL never fail to do in this place. MY family.  :'(