50 and over club- withdrawal and recovery issues for the aged :-)

[[Ho...]]

JJ one thing occurs to me, that you probably already know! A DAO Enzyme can help with histamine surges. Pretty sure histamine surges start the burning—I'm no expert but I found for me that eating started a lot of burning for me. I bought a DAO Enzyme, histaresist or something like that. I only took it once a day 15 minutes before lunch and it took a few days for my body to react to it, but it helped quite a bit.

 

I had to stop taking it after a few weeks because it ramped up my RLS at night. (My RLS is not from withdrawal.) I think it gave my body a chance to re-set a little, because the surges have calmed down. But if you haven't tried it, it's a thought!

 

Glad to hear you have some Gabapentin and that it helps a bit. Wish it helped more! Prayed for you!!

[[Ho...]]

The threads on here may be helpful http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=66.0

 

WBB

 

Thank you!

[[to...]]

Wave from hell inowwork men  drilling in the building again I swear to God I am cursed.. I can’t see how I’m ever going to get off this shit I feel totally trapped 🥲xxx ❤️ 💖

 

Hey Nova 1, so sorry you were going through hell! 

 

It is so strange, I was feeling some better and it has now been over 2 months on this hold and now I am in hell too!  It is crazy!  I thought it was a medical issue other than xanax and the doctor did a bunch of blood work and says it is normal other than I have high cholesterol.  He suggested a statin but I am hell bent on not adding more meds.  I have been working on lowering it by diet etc and that is working so no statin for me.  I already feel bad enough.

 

I had read on the up dose thread here that sometimes this does happen, we start to feel better and then all of a sudden we get hit with wd and I am guessing that is happening to me now.  People there say it can take weeks, months and some say years to stabalize.  I was feeling like you in thinking I had lost years wtih all this but I guess that it just takes however long it takes to get better.  I hate it and lately have had some dark thoughts as I really need a long break froom this hell! 

 

We will get through it, and I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.

 

I still do not know if you should go up or down and now, I am in that same place!  I am at .375 mg xanax a day and I have a cap of .50 mg a day and I may have to try that and if that does not work, I will have to start to taper down again.  I did not want to taper right now.  I wanted to get stable and stay there for a while but sometimes our CNS just does not like anything we do.

 

Hugs,

[[jo...]]

Hi JJ,

I saw your reference to the woman who touched the hem of Jesus' robe and was healed. I love the passage because he was pressed on all sides by people, but he felt the healing power go out of him with her touch. He didn't feel anything with all the others.

 

Many times I prayed and asked "Where is your robe? I want to touch it but I can't find it." A friend of mine who lives in Columbia has been a support to me. She and her husband are in full-time Christian work at a seminary. I told her and she said, "What a beautiful prayer." It was a desperate prayer, the prayer of a soul who is reaching and reaching and not finding. Then one day as I was driving, someone on the radio started talking about that passage. I have NO idea why, but I knew at that moment that I was healed. At first I was over the moon with joy and felt wonderful. Then still over the moon but not wonderful!

 

Nevertheless I know when God smiles a yes, and that was a yes from Him. I have held on to that and as time goes by, still hold onto it. When my strength was failing, I 'happened' to read an online Bible Study that spoke of God's promise of a son to Abraham and of course Sara. For years—seventeen, I think—nothing. You know the story; they thought God needed a little help and Hagar bore a son. Nope, that wasn't the son. At an impossible time, Isaac was born. No one could say it wasn't the hand of God, because Sara was way past the time she could really bear children.

 

So the lesson to me was, wait for it. It's coming. Abraham had to wait and so do I. So do you. Hard as that is many days, I'm waiting and still believing. I want it now! I'm shocked it's gone on so long and the agony was so relentless. But I will trust him for what I cannot understand, because if I could understand I would know the mysteries of the world. I am too small for that. I know it. But I am not too small to wait. I think I am! He doesn't. So I wait. I wait with you, I wait with all of those who struggle and suffer and feel like a shell of what they once were. All those who believe God is good even when their lives are shattered. God put Job back together. God is in the life-giving business. So what he takes away, he gives back mended, better than before.

 

I think of a passage in Revelations where one of the archangels had been dispatched by God in answer to prayer, but was prevented by a great heavenly battle. But come, he did! I wonder if there isn't a great heavenly battle now. Every prayer counts. Every step of faith. God will not fail because he can't, and greater is he that is in you than he who is in the world.  Your healing comes apace. God hasn't failed you.

 

Like you I long for the day when I'm on the other side of this. The Holy Spirit tells me that day comes. I believe for you, too! I am no one special. What he does for one, he will do for the other. It comes!!

 

 

Hi Hotcoldhotcold,

Wow you write so beautifully! Thank you so much for this.

I’m having a really hard day today; so much burning with no relief.

And all of a sudden today, I got a migraine with aura, that sent me into panic.

I haven’t had a migraine in years; I was so taken back when the aura came on.

I don’t know if it’s just stress from all this or because of the tension in my neck but it scared me.

I am truly praying for deliverance and appreciate your encouragement so much.

Wouid it be okay if I sent you a PM?

I hope you are having a good day.

Bless you with so much love.

[[jo...]]

JJ one thing occurs to me, that you probably already know! A DAO Enzyme can help with histamine surges. Pretty sure histamine surges start the burning—I'm no expert but I found for me that eating started a lot of burning for me. I bought a DAO Enzyme, histaresist or something like that. I only took it once a day 15 minutes before lunch and it took a few days for my body to react to it, but it helped quite a bit.

 

I had to stop taking it after a few weeks because it ramped up my RLS at night. (My RLS is not from withdrawal.) I think it gave my body a chance to re-set a little, because the surges have calmed down. But if you haven't tried it, it's a thought!

 

Glad to hear you have some Gabapentin and that it helps a bit. Wish it helped more! Prayed for you!!

 

Hi Hotcoldhotcold, I replied to the message above this one and all I can say is you are amazing!

What a beautiful spirit and heart that you have.

Yes, I take some stuff called Histamix where you take it 15 min before you eat. I try to watch what I eat as well. I’ve tried quercitin as well but it didn’t really help too much.

I’m just so perplexed as to why my burning is so ramped up. It’s like I’m in acute; so very painful and distressing. I was down on my knees today for both of us.

I pray that just like the centurion, that our faith will make us whole.

Bless you for being so sweet and kind.

Sending you big hugs. 🙏💕

[[Ho...]]

Hi JJ,

Yes you can pm me. I just started a log, because my blog is full of so many things! It's a release for me to write but not as helpful to look back on. I'm trying to keep the log simple but note my symptoms, lifestyle and changes so I can have a clearer perspective when I hit a bump in the road.

 

I like making friends, but oh, I hate it when things aren't going well for them! I'm troubled by your burning. It sure does make it easier to remember to pray for you though! The silver lining!

 

Thank you for remembering me!

[[no...]]

Wave from hell inowwork men  drilling in the building again I swear to God I am cursed.. I can’t see how I’m ever going to get off this shit I feel totally trapped 🥲xxx ❤️ 💖

 

Hey Nova 1, so sorry you were going through hell! 

 

It is so strange, I was feeling some better and it has now been over 2 months on this hold and now I am in hell too!  It is crazy!  I thought it was a medical issue other than xanax and the doctor did a bunch of blood work and says it is normal other than I have high cholesterol.  He suggested a statin but I am hell bent on not adding more meds.  I have been working on lowering it by diet etc and that is working so no statin for me.  I already feel bad enough.

 

I had read on the up dose thread here that sometimes this does happen, we start to feel better and then all of a sudden we get hit with wd and I am guessing that is happening to me now.  People there say it can take weeks, months and some say years to stabalize.  I was feeling like you in thinking I had lost years wtih all this but I guess that it just takes however long it takes to get better.  I hate it and lately have had some dark thoughts as I really need a long break froom this hell! 

 

We will get through it, and I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.

 

I still do not know if you should go up or down and now, I am in that same place!  I am at .375 mg xanax a day and I have a cap of .50 mg a day and I may have to try that and if that does not work, I will have to start to taper down again.  I did not want to taper right now.  I wanted to get stable and stay there for a while but sometimes our CNS just does not like anything we do.

 

Hugs,

Thanks T  sorry your in it too, the above in block is my big 'What to do now?? I honestly don't know at this point but until I feel a bit clear the only thing I can do now is keep holding until I feel I can/should  do one thing or the other. 

 

Nova  :smitten:

[[jo...]]

Hi JJ,

Yes you can pm me. I just started a log, because my blog is full of so many things! It's a release for me to write but not as helpful to look back on. I'm trying to keep the log simple but note my symptoms, lifestyle and changes so I can have a clearer perspective when I hit a bump in the road.

 

I like making friends, but oh, I hate it when things aren't going well for them! I'm troubled by your burning. It sure does make it easier to remember to pray for you though! The silver lining!

 

Thank you for remembering me!

 

Hi HCHC,

How wonderful that you have a blog. I have one too but don’t update it very much. I will look at yours.

I pray for you each day. Thank you for praying for me; having such a difficult time with the burning and anxiety.  I think the burning feeds the anxiety and then the anxiety feeds the burning. So very disturbing and painful. I hope you are feeling better!

Big hugs to you! 🙏💕🙏

[[Ho...]]

JJ, do you know Pamster? You probably do; she's one of the administrators. I've seen her encourage others in your boat because apparently it's not all that unusual for people to have a big surprise for about a month at the year-to-fourteen-month mark. I also remember reading someone had a huge and unexpected wave, really shocked them and pulled them under, and, poof! It left. Just like that.

 

I hope you can find ways to get out of your head and body and somehow be in a different place, just for a little while every day. I think about you and pray for you too! He's here. It doesn't feel like it but he's closer than you think. I've been struggling a lot lately too. Good things are happening all around us though. Let's keep our eyes and ears peeled for them so we don't miss even tiny opportunities to be grateful and in awe of life. This benzo down is just a big lie. God, give us grace to see though it, all the way to You!

[[bu...]]

Hi JJ,

Yes you can pm me. I just started a log, because my blog is full of so many things! It's a release for me to write but not as helpful to look back on. I'm trying to keep the log simple but note my symptoms, lifestyle and changes so I can have a clearer perspective when I hit a bump in the road.

 

I like making friends, but oh, I hate it when things aren't going well for them! I'm troubled by your burning. It sure does make it easier to remember to pray for you though! The silver lining!

 

Thank you for remembering me!

 

Hi HCHC,

How wonderful that you have a blog. I have one too but don’t update it very much. I will look at yours.

I pray for you each day. Thank you for praying for me; having such a difficult time with the burning and anxiety.  I think the burning feeds the anxiety and then the anxiety feeds the burning. So very disturbing and painful. I hope you are feeling better!

Big hugs to you! 🙏💕🙏

 

Hi, I'm sorry you're suffering after such a short time being on benzos. I came across one of your posts on burning skin and you were wondering when it goes away. What confuses me is that you had burning skin before ever being on benzos, according to your signature line, so it sounds like it's unrelated to benzos in your case. I know it's scary for you, but it's really nothing serious.

[[Mo...]]

MA Saying hi. Logged in because I'm looking over material to choose to show my 17yo son (I'm 60) about what happened in/to my life.

 

[[sp...]]

I was 44 first time i got hooked on Xanax then switched to valium taper....youd think that would be enough....nope took me about 6 months to taper off.

 

Im not 54 and got hooked again on xanax, now switching over to valium taper

[[Iv...]]

I came here to vent a bit.  I am holding at .33 mgs Clonazepam a day, have been there since August '22 as my attempts to go lower failed horribly.

Anyway, the coming week is going to be the most challenging of my life as far as work, and I am tempted to updose.  To .375 mgs a day, I don't think it's worth it. I am 60 years old and I am going to use every technique known to humanity to get through this week.  Starting with checking in here, followed by a walk outside today even though it's grey and freezing, I really need it. 

I see the past few commenters have symptoms similar to mine, but like me, nothing shows up on medical tests except maybe high LDL cholesterol.  (I have high HDL and low triglycerides, so my ratios are good, and I did read that statins release more glutamate so I am not going with them while tapering & holding).  Will check back in over this week.  Take care everyone.

[[jo...]]

Hi, I'm sorry you're suffering after such a short time being on benzos. I came across one of your posts on burning skin and you were wondering when it goes away. What confuses me is that you had burning skin before ever being on benzos, according to your signature line, so it sounds like it's unrelated to benzos in your case. I know it's scary for you, but it's really nothing serious.

 

Hi Butterfly,

Thanks so much. I started getting the burning nerve/skin pain on my arms while on the Xanax due to interdose withdrawals.  I never had it before taking the Xanax. Once the interdose withdrawals started happening I finally researched it and found this site. Which I then learned about interdose withdrawals and tolerance. I then realized I had to get off this poison.

I had all kind of labs done, dermatology, MRI,  etc.. finally found Benzo buddies and realized what it was.

Sadly, it is still hanging on and is mostly on my head and lower legs and shoulders. I basically did a CT, and I had tapered an AD 8 months prior to the Xanax usage so my CNS was already hypersensitive when I began the Xanax, and then the CT, really hurt me. It’s nuts, but burning nerve pain, burning skin feeling, it is a common symptom. There are a few others in the 12-24 month support group that are dealing with the same along with muscle pain. It’s just awful.

I hope to turn a corner soon. Hope you are well.

[[no...]]

Hi, I'm sorry you're suffering after such a short time being on benzos. I came across one of your posts on burning skin and you were wondering when it goes away. What confuses me is that you had burning skin before ever being on benzos, according to your signature line, so it sounds like it's unrelated to benzos in your case. I know it's scary for you, but it's really nothing serious.

 

Hi Butterfly,

Thanks so much. I started getting the burning nerve/skin pain on my arms while on the Xanax due to interdose withdrawals.  I never had it before taking the Xanax. Once the interdose withdrawals started happening I finally researched it and found this site. Which I then learned about interdose withdrawals and tolerance. I then realized I had to get off this poison.

I had all kind of labs done, dermatology, MRI,  etc.. finally found Benzo buddies and realized what it was.

Sadly, it is still hanging on and is mostly on my head and lower legs and shoulders. I basically did a CT, and I had tapered an AD 8 months prior to the Xanax usage so my CNS was already hypersensitive when I began the Xanax, and then the CT, really hurt me. It’s nuts, but burning nerve pain, burning skin feeling, it is a common symptom. There are a few others in the 12-24 month support group that are dealing with the same along with muscle pain. It’s just awful.

I hope to turn a corner soon. Hope you are well.

I have it all to also brain on fire and I'm tapering had it for ages now

 

 

Nova 

[[Ho...]]

I am 70.so def over 50.b3en on diazepam 10mg at night for 6 months.now down to 7 mg in 3 weeks. Think way too fast taper as 2nd night of each taper I get awful pain and restless leg at night.going to take it a bit slower I think.

[[no...]]

I am 70.so def over 50.b3en on diazepam 10mg at night for 6 months.now down to 7 mg in 3 weeks. Think way too fast taper as 2nd night of each taper I get awful pain and restless leg at night.going to take it a bit slower I think.

 

 

Nova 

[[jo...]]

JJ, do you know Pamster? You probably do; she's one of the administrators. I've seen her encourage others in your boat because apparently it's not all that unusual for people to have a big surprise for about a month at the year-to-fourteen-month mark. I also remember reading someone had a huge and unexpected wave, really shocked them and pulled them under, and, poof! It left. Just like that.

 

I hope you can find ways to get out of your head and body and somehow be in a different place, just for a little while every day. I think about you and pray for you too! He's here. It doesn't feel like it but he's closer than you think. I've been struggling a lot lately too. Good things are happening all around us though. Let's keep our eyes and ears peeled for them so we don't miss even tiny opportunities to be grateful and in awe of life. This benzo down is just a big lie. God, give us grace to see though it, all the way to You!

 

Hi HCHC,

You always have a way of shining light into this journey.

Thank you so much for your encouragement and I pray for you too.

I’m trying to get out of my head; sometimes I don’t even recognize the person I have become during this past year of suffering so my pain. I used to be so happy and full of joy and peace and confidence, but I feel none of that now.  I feel lost and alone, I don’t have family and my closest friend no longer comes around or calls, but I have to trust that the Lord will restore me, and you too.

I hope you are feeling better. Sending you big hugs! 💕🙏

[[jo...]]

Hi, I'm sorry you're suffering after such a short time being on benzos. I came across one of your posts on burning skin and you were wondering when it goes away. What confuses me is that you had burning skin before ever being on benzos, according to your signature line, so it sounds like it's unrelated to benzos in your case. I know it's scary for you, but it's really nothing serious.

 

Hi Butterfly,

Thanks so much. I started getting the burning nerve/skin pain on my arms while on the Xanax due to interdose withdrawals.  I never had it before taking the Xanax. Once the interdose withdrawals started happening I finally researched it and found this site. Which I then learned about interdose withdrawals and tolerance. I then realized I had to get off this poison.

I had all kind of labs done, dermatology, MRI,  etc.. finally found Benzo buddies and realized what it was.

Sadly, it is still hanging on and is mostly on my head and lower legs and shoulders. I basically did a CT, and I had tapered an AD 8 months prior to the Xanax usage so my CNS was already hypersensitive when I began the Xanax, and then the CT, really hurt me. It’s nuts, but burning nerve pain, burning skin feeling, it is a common symptom. There are a few others in the 12-24 month support group that are dealing with the same along with muscle pain. It’s just awful.

I hope to turn a corner soon. Hope you are well.

I have it all to also brain on fire and I'm tapering had it for ages now

 

 

Nova 

 

Hi Nova,

I’m so sorry that you are having to deal with the horrible burning brain and body. It has absolutely broken me for 12 months and even while on the Xanax. I had no idea.

Do you also have deep muscle and bone pain? I’ve just now started having this; I’ve read that other symptoms can pop up even months off.

It’s truly bizarre how all this affects the CNS.

I’ve been discouraged that I’m still having such a hard time. The anxiety and now depression having been hard too because of the painful burning and body pain.

I know it takes time but I pray it won’t be much longer.

How are you enduring and feeling? I hope you feel better soon. 💕

[[we...]]

Ive got 13 months as of the 19th. My 2nd week detox started. I had my first root canal and Christmas shopping that week when it all happened. Ive traveled, made multiple trips (on purpose), just spent an hour doing aerobatics on a sunny day with a friend.

 

All my close friends disappeared, job fell apart, lost all my money and live with my cat. If I didn't take notes I wouldn't know where I was. Perception of time is still shot. All the symptoms you've mentioned were 24/7 but easing off. Probably my #1 issue is anger. Not like lose it but really the anger is coming from self pity. I am chalking it up to various stages of grief. I believe I'm on the backside of this but probably some will linger.

 

Anyway I'm alive and turn 51 in 3 weeks, yeah

[[ne...]]

Hi folks

 

I`m so happy to find somewhere with others in my age group to go through this journey with.    I`m 72, so probably older than a lot of you here but hopefully someone will come along who`s my age too.

 

I`m tapering diaz and now down to 1.75mg from 10 mg.  This is my second time doing this, I`m so angry with myself for listening to a Dr and taking a benzo again.  Is anyone here in a similar situation, going through this for a a second time?  I`d love to hear how you`re doing?

 

My worst sx is muscle pain, and right now as I`ve got low in my dose I`m waking up sweating, which I recognise from my 1st time.  And some tinnitus and dizziness going on. But the pain is definitely the worst of the lot. 

 

Blessings to everyone and wish us all some glorious windows

 

NCT

 

[[fo...]]

Nice to be in this group. Yes, this is my second attempt to taper. Last time I couldn't get below 6mg and had to increase due to covid and my anxiety which was then through the roof. I am 65. I've been tapering Diazepam for the past 13 months. Was on a mixture of Ativan and Diazepam before dropping the Ativan within a week and starting the taper from 33mg of Diaz. I've been on one benzo or another for the past 12 years. I have been using the cut and hold method until I reached 6 mg nearly 3 weeks ago. It means at that point I've cut 27mg in 13 months. Is that too fast? I mean its been really difficult most of the time, but somehow I've managed it with my only support coming from other benzo groups, zoom meetings, and a few people I have met in them. I also live alone and all my symptoms seem to be psychological, mainly anxiety and depression type symptoms. I also have Anhedonia, sexual dysfunction and irrational thinking/mild paranoia. The only physical symptom is irritable bowel and some muscle aches and pains, but I've changed my diet to address this. I do get fatigued and stressed out quite easily and often have bad mornings. I do manage to get out for a daily walk though but even then I don't go that far. I suppose I have some agoraphobia but its not too bad. I know Diazepam isn't the best for the depression side of things but its still the best drug to do a taper from. Now I'm getting lower I'm quite frightened to think this could get a lot worse before it gets any better. I know in the past 13 months I've had SI type thinking a few times and have on 2 occasions had to take a one off rescue dose of Lorazepam rather than going to A & E here in the UK. It did help, but I've still continued with the Diazepam taper.  I have now decided to go over to micro tapering, with the help of someone who is already doing this. This is to try and avoid going over the recommended 10%. Its a bit messy weighing the daily doses and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet as I only started less than a week ago. I'm just worried about the future all the time but I understand this is the benzo brain mostly. I'm also questioning why did I even start tapering and causing all this suffering in the first place, but of course I felt I had no choice because I realised I had probably been in tolerance, with associated symptoms, for years, without even realising it. I do have a prescriber who supports the slow taper.

 

I've recently started some counselling therapy because I feel I have something else going on and had a difficult time before I decided to taper. I know some coaches say its best to wait for any therapy until we are off the drug, but others say it has really helped them. Again who do you believe? I guess I will know soon enough. I booked a group of 3 sessions initially. So far it has helped a bit but this week it will be the last of the block of 3 so I will have to decide whether or not to continue. I would be grateful to hear of what other people think about therapy? I only have 2 brothers left as immediate family, but I don't get on with either of them and they don't know I'm going through this. I'm still deliberating whether or not I should let at least one of them know, but its a risk because they probably wouldn't understand and therefore wouldn't be a source of support. Thanks for listening to my story so far. I feel we all need as much support as possible. Has anyone found a buddie on here?

 

Currently daily prescription:-

 

Diazepam (now just below 6mg).

Mirtazapine 30mg

Pregabalin 2 x 50mg

 

 

[[Ha...]]

Just to give hope…..I’m 15 months off and feeling so much better.

I don’t know whether it’s coincidence but I’m having GABA rice everyday for lunch and since I started eating that I have really picked up.

I’ve looked after my granddaughter today on my own! I could not have done that just 3 months ago.

It’s joyous!

Hardy x

[[Ha...]]

I’m 68 and a half. By 70 I hope to be reborn!

[[or...]]

Just an fyi . . . I'm 75 and feel a whole lot better off the drugs than when I was on them (for anxiety, depression, whatever).  Of course, I'm several years beyond my taper, and I felt not too great for the immediate few years just after I jumped, but things got better and better. Wow! I've even started a new business. Life is good. Hold onto hope, my friends.

 

 

Best,

 

Katz