Post Benzo Protracted Withdrawal Support Group

[[sa...]]

Thank you Ruth, good reminders. I notice I feel much worse when I'm dehydrated.

[[Ja...]]

Might be too early on to claim victory but after taking a one dose AB doc gave me for a urinary infection I had much of the dizziness is now gone! This is cool! But I hope it stays...

 

Ed

[[mc...]]

I am about 18 months out and my main symptom of insomnia is still a real downer.  I have had periods recently of much better sleep - than I played in a tennis tournament about a month ago and got slammed with bad sleep.  I don't know if insomnia is the right definition  - I know its an amped nervous system.  I notice that my dreams can be very vivid and wake me up feeling wired - which won't go away.  I feel like my body is producing wake up drugs that interrupt my sleep from one cycle to the next - I might get 2 or 3 cycles in ( 90 minutes each approx ) and then wake up.  When I was younger it was I was fighting to wake up in the morning - now it feels like I am fighting to fall back asleep.

 

Does anyone relate.  Can anyone explain this?  I know time is the healer and I used to have to get up at night and walk around to flush the stress hormones - now I don't - but sometimes it feels like I am resigned to this life.  Very frustrating ... Like to hear

 

[[ch...]]

Hello all, first time posting on this forum. In April I'll be at 3 years off Klonopin after a severe cold turkey.  I must say that a lot of the symptoms are gone, but the head pressure, eye pressure, muscle aches fatigue and mental issues still concern me.  I get very anxious (probably cause of work) but also paranoid.  I hate the feeling but its there.  I have found one thing that has worked. About 3 weeks ago I was really ruff and for some reason came across Passion Flower Extract.  I don't take anything at all, not even for a cold, but I was willing to give something natural a try.  I went and bought a dropper and honestly after taking it, by anxiety decreased by 80%.  Couple that with cammomile tea at night and I was doing pretty good. Now, its not a wonder drug and I still feel the symptoms, but the anxiety isn't as severe and makes it tolerable.  Well, just though I would add that to the forum. 

Hope everyone feels better soon, I hope I do as well.

peace

[[Wh...]]

Welcome to BenzoBuddies Chuck ... I have added you to the protracted list that I have going for my own interest in the actual numbers and you are #60 of people that post to this forum.  It appears that you came off a month ahead of me, only difference is you went cold turkey ... the majority of protracted are from c/t but not all.  Interesting that you mentioned that Passion Flower Extract helped ... I've heard that recently from someone else.  I think I'll give it a go.

 

The symptoms you mentioned are pretty much what I'm dealing with also except for the eye pressure.  It is pretty exhausting to have lived with this for so long.  I hope you and everyone feels better soon too.  I keep thinking it can't be that much longer but who knows?  Keep the faith and ...

 

Peace back. 

[[ga...]]

Hi all,

 

I was benzo free in April 2010 and remained that way until Dec 2011. Then I got hit with two flus while on vacation, along with pressure at work and from holidays. My insomnia came roaring back. I tried to do walks when I woke up then started using Nutra Sleep again (Natural sleep aid). Things only got worse, and I was averaging 2 - 4 hrs of sleep/night. It became very difficult to function at work, let alone drive a car. After a month and a half, I had to go back to Trizolam and get sleep again. This time, I only started with a half tablet and have been slowly tapering. I'm hoping to be benzo free in the next couple months. Very frustrating when you get an insomnia relapse, when you've been sleepng naturally for a long time. Has anyone experience that ? 

 

George

[[pa...]]

Hi Chuck - Welcome.  I've been off for 18 months and still have one nagging, stubborn symptom - burning nerve pain coupled with feeling very hot a lot of the time.  What has brought me some relief for the past 2 months is passionflower.  It is very calming and quiets my nerves so they stay in the background for the most part.  I'm glad you are being helped by it too. 

 

Paresthesia

[[Fl...]]

Hello,

 

Just wanted to chime in. I am 17 months out from a c/t and I use passion flower too. I have all the same symptoms as chuck plus more, ear pressure, trouble sleeping etc. Things are improving so very slowly but I could not have made it this far without the passion flower.

 

Rain

[[Ho...]]

I would be careful with anything that works on GABA.

 

Taking it might not be so much of a problem, but upon discontinuation..............who knows?

 

 

To each their own, though. Glad it's working for you. 

[[sp...]]

Hello,

 

Just wanted to chime in. I am 17 months out from a c/t and I use passion flower too. I have all the same symptoms as chuck plus more, ear pressure, trouble sleeping etc. Things are improving so very slowly but I could not have made it this far without the passion flower.

 

Rain

Hi folks,

            Just like to add my name to this list,have now been benzo free for over 2 years and 1 month,still have bad gastric problems which are my worst w/d symptoms at the moment  . After having many of the w/d symptoms in the ashton manual i feel that i am slowly healing but it is a long and painful road.

Thanks so much for these posts and this site it does help when we suffering and dont feel so alone.

 

          Best regards spanish, :-*

[[pa...]]

If you are going to avoid anything that works on gaba then you are going to have to avoid a lot of food:  almonds, whole wheat, oats, walnuts, brown rice, lentils, potatoes, broccoli bananas, and oranges among others.  There is no research that I have been able to find that indicates there is a withdrawal problems with passionflower - valerian, yes, but passionflower, no.

 

Glad to know I'm not the only one finding a little relief:)

 

Paresthesia

[[Ga...]]

hi everyone. I c/t off xanax last Sept. My remaining symptoms are: VIBRATING, ringing screaming ears, anxiety etc. Can I ask the people who use Passion flower, if you use the drops, how many drops do you put in the juice, water, etc? Thanks.

I have seen the drops and the capsules, not sure which ones to try!

I hav heard such good things about Passionflower, I want to try!

Does itmake you drowsy?

[[Ho...]]

If you are going to avoid anything that works on gaba then you are going to have to avoid a lot of food:  almonds, whole wheat, oats, walnuts, brown rice, lentils, potatoes, broccoli bananas, and oranges among others.  There is no research that I have been able to find that indicates there is a withdrawal problems with passionflower - valerian, yes, but passionflower, no.

 

Glad to know I'm not the only one finding a little relief:)

 

Paresthesia

 

That's great to hear.    Does it help with any of the physical protracted symptoms? If it helped with THAT, I would even be willing to try it out.

 

I will study it more.

 

So far, one of the important things i've saw is this:

 

PASSIONFLOWER INTERACTIONS

 

Moderate Interaction Be cautious with this combination

 

Sedative medications (CNS depressants) interacts with PASSIONFLOWER

Passionflower might cause sleepiness and drowsiness. Medications that cause sleepiness are called sedatives. Taking passionflower along with sedative medications might cause too much sleepiness.

 

Some sedative medications include:

 

pentobarbital (Nembutal)

phenobarbital (Luminal)

secobarbital (Seconal)

clonazepam (Klonopin)

lorazepam (Ativan)

zolpidem (Ambien)

 

and others.

 

 

 

[[Bi...]]

I have a question.

 

How do you guys know you are protracted when only 6 - 12 months out?

 

How do you guys know it's not all the tonics, herbals, and whatever tonic you may take not making you symptomatic?

 

I'm not being a smarta@@ I'm just curious

 

Billy.

 

 

 

[[Ja...]]

This game of waiting is beyond old for some of us. I have come to the conclusion that I might need to go back to taking an SSRI to have this calm down some. The infections and constant state of stress can't be anymore healthy than taking a medication that might slow that down.

BUT before I make that decision I'm going to give myself another month to try a few things. Today, I'm going to try some acupunture and see if that does anything.

I will next time a week off work and all responsibility and see if that does anything as well...

 

As someone mentioned here you can't just sit around and hope that does the job...not after 2 years and 7 months off.

 

Ed

[[pa...]]

I use a liquid form.  You can get it alcohol free if you want - I've used both.  I follow the directions on the bottle.  I have never had to take the maximum dose.  I usually take about 1/3 of the dose.  For instance, if it says 30 - 40 drops 2 - 5 times a day I might take 15 drops 2X a day -  or rarely, 3X.  This works for me.  Some might need more, others less.  And for some it might not work at all.  But it's worth a try.

 

Paresthesia

[[Bi...]]

How do you guys know it's not all the tonics, herbals, and whatever tonic you may take not making you symptomatic?

 

I ask this because of several reasons. I know when I was on Klonopin, this was back in 2007. I was on 4mg at the time, and I remember trying a few herbs and they amped me up then! I could not imagine trying that today.

I also tried a multi-vitamin once and I wanted to run out of a window! It was ridiculous. Fish oil did me the same way.

I don't know of any tonics, potions, herbs, or weeds that helps this.

If you find any let all of us know.

 

Thanks, Billy.

PS- I guess some things work for others when it doesn't for some. CAREFUL!

[[Ja...]]

Don't mean to stir up controversy but if someone takes herbs, tonics, or anything they consider "natural" there might be a reason for it and that's probably due to them not feeling great. So if you take something and it doesn't work or makes you feel worse, it will probably be a good idea to drop it.

 

To me most things natural taken in moderate doses (or in a dose indicated by doc or on the container's instructions) do not cause any harm but probably don't do a thing to help either. I've tried many and right now my advice would be to avoid them since they are a waste of money.

 

NOT recommending you take anything before you talk to your doc about it, but only SSRIs appear to help the most us benzo heads so I might go back to one if things don't improve much in the next month (enough waiting for me already).

 

Ed

[[ch...]]

Didn't mean to start up a passion flower craze here. I was just bringing it up that it helped me a tad.  I feel guilty enough taking something, but if it provides a little relief from the craziness at 3 years out. Then I'm all for it.  OK, next subject then. 

 

Just wanted to say that I really appreciate this forum topic.  I felt very alone the past few months and thought I was just going looney until I saw people as bad off as I am with protracted.  Honestly I forget about the withdrawl and get so into work and stuff that I just think I'm going nuts and forget I'm still withdrawling.  I don't want to see anyone suffering like this, but it's nice to see i'm not alone.  Even told my boss today at work (who is my best friend and thinks i'm just nuts) about this site and as I could here her saying oh wow, yea, thats great. She like most people who have never been through it just don't understand. 

 

So, here are Chucks things to do when your bored in withdrawl:

Play World of Warcraft  ( 85 levels takes a while and you get into something, join a guild cause they have no clue who you are and you can sound crazy all day long)

Get a cat-  This has been a relief.  I hate to love my cat, but she is fun to play with sometimes and takes my mind off things

Of course walks and crap, but when you are this far out, you have wore out most shoes by walking, so the excitement is gone.

New sheets for your bed- I have now gone through 6 pairs of sheets just cause the feel good when they are new

Get a new Pillow- Good lord, I think I hit 15 pillows last week.  I just can't find that comfy one that feels as good as my old one.

Youtube:  hours of stupid fun that will dumb you down for a while.

 

 

C/T  from 6 years of Klonpin at 6mgs a day towards the end.  Fully recovered alcoholic March 2009, and sorta %80 recovered Klonopin abuser as of March 2009.  God has a plan as I should not be here today.  Dear god, Please help me to be the person my dog thinks I am!

 

[[Ga...]]

Thanks Parathesia. I think I will start out with half the dose like you do.

 

chuck, good idea, I hate my pillow gonna get a new one this weekend.

[[st...]]

Ed, you certainly are not alone.  Welcome to BB.

 

Jarocho,  I felt the same as you  between the 2-3 year mark but I started seeing some good healing after 36 months where I could function quite a bit better. 

 

Patty xo

[[Ja...]]

Ed, you certainly are not alone.  Welcome to BB.

 

Jarocho,  I felt the same as you  between the 2-3 year mark but I started seeing some good healing after 36 months where I could function quite a bit better. 

 

Patty xo

Hi Patty, I appreciate your input!

 

Ed

[Guest [ru...]]

Geez what is happening - how come I am STILL not getting emails re this thread anymore???  Very strange!!! 

 

Yip well still going from bluntedness to loads more crying now SIGH. I prayed for this time to come for ages, but never thought it would be like this.  Someone called it "emotional flooding" by crikey is it ever!!!  Finding the swings sooooooo hard to deal with - ya just feel like a raging friggin lunatic going from deadness to feelings so large & alive again!!!  Or the brain just shuts a cry down in mid-cry - grrr how entirely frustrating.  Someone PLEASE remind me this is PART OF THE HEALING PROCESS & is a GOOD SIGN of healing??? i.e. the crying

 

More DR has set in lately too - geez it is so subtle you never notice it descending on you until you catch yourself saying you're "in a bubble".  Then something that gives you a scare temporarily snaps you out of it (only briefly) only to feel deep panic or pain or whatever then it slowly unnoticeably descends on your mind again so you cant see consequences or really realize what you are doing-grrrr! Just feel worse than a space cadet.  Yeah I spose thats the mind protecting itself from further harm/shock.  It DOES help me if I'm explained whats happening.

 

Wish I could just snap out of it or back into it or something.  DR sucks big time.  Crap does it ever ruddy end!?!?!    I spose I also need to grieve & process OUT all the emotions as they are coming up too - shock/anger on whats been done to me, the awesome tremendously caring person I lost (moi) with loads of abilities, great personality & wit/sense of humour, and how it damaged my relationships as a Mum and Daughter.  Geez I am so grateful I am still loved!!!  Raped my mind & my confidence & just everything.  :'(  I spose we are ALL going through that too yeah???  Anyone else have these too???

 

Hugs and Prayers to all BBs xoxoxo

 

Just as a sidenote I notice a few here are saying they are having help from Passionflower.  I've researched this and its anti-anxiety.  I feel as the emotions start to resurge I am feeling intense/overwhelming emotions & my mind just cant shut off from the horror of it all & where I'm still at.  Lemonbalm, Holy Basil, Valerian, Hops & all that are supposed to be good for ptsd, anxiety & panic too.  I sure feel like I have PTSD from all the unbelievable horror of this.  My mind will just NOT shut off.  I do feel traumatized STILL.  I WILL find a way to alleviate my suffering.  Wish me luck people & I hope the above helps.

[Guest [ru...]]

Hi all - Hugs & Prayers to all those struggling....

 

I'm now finding those surges of emotions (going from dead/blunt to overwhelmingly alive) start with a feeling of major panic like a tsunami is about to happen or something.  Then its like I'm trying to hold on & talk positive (almost impossible with the super racy unstoppable circular thoughts & shot memory) then whoomph its like all the emotions come flooding out like a tidal wave of emotion into loads of crying. (I always used to say better out than in but I DO need reminders - as no man is an island, we all need each other!!! Especially for encouragement, praise & sharing what helps.)

 

Other times you start crying & the brain just shuts it all off mid-cry & swells again (gives you more pain).  I've had a good friend tell me that the crying is a GOOD SIGN of HEALING (but with my memory so shot & the hyper-racy circular thoughts its hard to remember that!!! If the thoughts wld stop whizzing around maybe my memory wld be a tad better  .  So I need reminders).  I had another old friend cry for 15 months straight every day!

 

Is the above the way it is happening or happened for others too???  Do the feelings of constant major panic eventually subside???

 

On a more positive progress note I am getting dribs & drabs of previous life wisdom memory occassionally coming back to mind nowdays, but with so much of this intense dead to intensely super alive emotional swings going on I just feel beyond wrecked & exhausted.  I really just need a super huge great big long hug & some comforting encouraging words.

 

I know we are all INCREDIBLY STRONG for holding on through all this pooh even though it dont feel like it.  Huge gentle pats on back to all for coming through everything everyone has gotten through.  Geez my jaw muscles still lock occassionally now too, but not as bad thank God. Cant wait til I can have a huge great big laugh again & feel my heart & wisdom again.... :'(

 

For the ppl that are using PASSIONFLOWER & finding it useful - in what ways are you finding it helpful???  To calm the racy thoughts???  Or to feel a bit more centred or calm emotionally???  I'd really appreciate ANY feedback on the ways that it is helping you.  I've just ordered some LemonBalm Oil AND caps & Holy Basil to see if that will help CALM my thoughts & emotions somewhat.  With all the research I've done I've got a big long list of suggestive herbs for calming but am simply totally confused on what would be more beneficial in this hyper-sensitive state.

 

I am wondering perhaps the racy thoughts is the brain switching on again (a sign of healing), but only has a couple of speeds right now - racy & almost off (as opposed to grinding super hard in the beginning to think).  Also I think the DR is a form of shock & a protection mechanism for the mind.  And the agoraphobia - I dont think its true fear or phobia as such, its more overstimulation -more stimulus than the brain can cope with information/senses wise.  That insight/understanding helps & encourages me to realize what might truly be happening.  I'd really appreciate any feedback re the Passionflower & anything else.

 

Love & Hugs to you All xoxoxo 

 

Well, I've found some words of inspiration I'd like to share from My Man, Tyler Perry 

http://www.tylerperry.com/scrapbook/video/77/

[[st...]]

So thankful for this thread.  Very good idea.  Must go ahead and put my name on this too as another one in protracted withdrawal.  I went through a horrific Effexor withdrawal and have been 50 months away from that.  Then after that, tapered the .5 mg of Xanax (7 month taper) I had been on for almost four years.  So currently am almost at the 20 months off mark in one more week.  I have healed a ton along the way but the plateaus last soooo long and I think that's where I am at right now.  This is what I am left with:

 

Head symptoms-this accounts for the majority of my symptoms.  Helium head, nerve pains in temples, sometimes base of skull, and other hot spots in the head, tinnitus low grade but still there especially after overdoing.  Some strange and constant pressure in the sinus area in the front of my face with pressure behind the eyes a ton and that nasal burning of nerves that at times feels like menthol is in my nose.  Histamine also only in the mornings and at night.  Head aches that can range from mild to severe.  Occasional wonky vision from overstimulation.  Massage does help some with the head symptoms.

 

Occasional sleep problems-sometimes out of the blue 3 hours of sleep.  Occasional nightmares.

 

Occasional GI upset although this has improved majorly over a long long period of time. 

 

Occasional burning chest when overdoing which I kind of wonder if it's connected to the GI upset at times.

 

Weight gain-this is one of my most frustrating since I eat VERY healthy and exercise can still be difficult at times especially for the head symptoms.

 

PMS problems-NEVER had any issues with this until withdrawal. Cycles are running at 35+ days and are severe but short.  Acne like I have never had before since I NEVER had acne.  Lots of oily face.  Pains.  Sleep gets bad at this time as well.  Also been trying to conceive since November and not ovulating.  Had some hormone panels done and everything is "normal" even thyroid which suprises me since I know this has been an issue in the past with withdrawal.  Tried progesterone cream some and although it made some things better, made other things worse like anxiety/cortisol. 

 

I think that's about it.  I know it still sounds like a lot but I do function pretty well despite all these.  I just wish these things would go so that I could get my life back completely!  Whew!  Feels good to get this out to people that understand and hopefully this will help others.  Sometimes I wonder if it's still leftover stuff from the Effexor, or if this is all the benzo.  Hard to tell and impossible to figure out so I just keep pushing forward in hopes that someday it will all be healed!  I just can't believe how long it all takes.