2018 Jump Squad

[[Mi...]]

I agree kpinsurvivor. I found that out the hard way lol. I've stayed away from alcohol and caffeine. Alcohol makes it better for a few hours and then worse. Caffeine during withdrawal sucked I felt horrible after I drank coffee lol. Good luck to you and happy New Year, this will pass in time 😊

[[To...]]

Hey buddies.  I plan on jumping on Jan 16, so may I join in?  I am down to .38 mg valium and cutting .03 mg per day.  I could jump any time now, but want to keep going to 0 so as not to risk more than necessary.  I'm doing ok except for some depression and dp/dr (not quite sure if what I'm experiencing is that, but I think so...it's hard for me to be myself around people).

Hey gardenlady. Looks like we are going to be jumping on the same day. I'm really feathering out the final tenth of a milligram at .01mg/day of lorazepam. So, like you, I could have jumped sooner but going to take an easy glide down to zero.

 

My w/d issues are with sleep, which isn't horrible (between 5 and 6 hours, with one wake-up during the night) but wears me out, and daily anxiety, which is why I was on this sh*t in the first place, so learning how to live with that will always be my challenge.

 

I am excited about being able to say I am done. Good luck to you as well!

[[kp...]]

I really hope the klonopin isnt messing with me. I was expecting hell during the last 4 days...

 

For anyone scared to jump, its been a smooth landing so far

[[Et...]]

I second that Kpinsurvivor, the landing has been a lot better than expected. I still have a lot of symptoms, but nothing that would have been out of the ordinary during the taper; I do have less anxiety. I still feel like I'm going nuts because I'm not worried. 

[[fe...]]

The fear is our worst enemy. Last night I went to bed at 11pm. I fall asleep immediately. 50 minutes later I was awake again and fearful not being able to sleep again...I told to myself: well I f I don't sleep, who cares..tomorrow I am going to sleep. And then voila! I slept for 4 hours and then 2 hours more, for a solid 6 hours of sleep. Once I accept my sleep problem I slept almost instantly.

[[kp...]]

I second that Kpinsurvivor, the landing has been a lot better than expected. I still have a lot of symptoms, but nothing that would have been out of the ordinary during the taper; I do have less anxiety. I still feel like I'm going nuts because I'm not worried. 

 

I see you jumped from the oldschool benzo librium! How was that crossover???

[[kp...]]

The fear is our worst enemy. Last night I went to bed at 11pm. I fall asleep immediately. 50 minutes later I was awake again and fearful not being able to sleep again...I told to myself: well I f I don't sleep, who cares..tomorrow I am going to sleep. And then voila! I slept for 4 hours and then 2 hours more, for a solid 6 hours of sleep. Once I accept my sleep problem I slept almost instantly.

 

The only time i have a hard time sleeping is when i think about it. Our minds are fascinating, huh? 

[[fe...]]

The fear is our worst enemy. Last night I went to bed at 11pm. I fall asleep immediately. 50 minutes later I was awake again and fearful not being able to sleep again...I told to myself: well I f I don't sleep, who cares..tomorrow I am going to sleep. And then voila! I slept for 4 hours and then 2 hours more, for a solid 6 hours of sleep. Once I accept my sleep problem I slept almost instantly.

 

The only time i have a hard time sleeping is when i think about it. Our minds are fascinating, huh? 

 

Yes it is!! today I was having kind of an anxiety attack..and then I concentrated on it and tried to feel worse than I was..and then, the attack suddenly diminished

[[Ch...]]

Just stopping in to see how it's going for everyone... sounds good all around! 

[[To...]]

How's it going everyone?

 

Ethan, you cracked me up with that lotery analogy!  Yeah, I would say I definitely have better odds than that, lol! 

 

TooManyBennies, GardenLady, welcome to the gang! You seem well on your way to a successful taper! Congrats!

 

Sicory, I hope all goes well with your Xanax w/d. Do you have some Valium on hand if things start getting nasty? Wishing you the best of luck!

Thanks new0girl! I saw my doctor today and she laughed (in a good way) when I told her that I was at .11mg and was micro tapering. She called it a chemistry experiment, but was very happy with my progress. She was very supportive to me throughout this past year -- very important to have a supportive doc!

 

Anyway, I'm glad to be so close to jumping -- I hope you are doing well...

[[Et...]]

I second that Kpinsurvivor, the landing has been a lot better than expected. I still have a lot of symptoms, but nothing that would have been out of the ordinary during the taper; I do have less anxiety. I still feel like I'm going nuts because I'm not worried. 

 

I see you jumped from the oldschool benzo librium! How was that crossover???

 

I didn't really cross over, I had been using weekly 1 or 2 Mg hits of Klonpin a week for about 10 years, then I added Librax (Librium + Another Stomach Med) for 2 years every day.  And I drank 3-4 days a week.  So there was never really a cross over. I had tolerance from way back; In hindsight who knows how long I had tolerance withdrawal.

 

Fer, it sounds like you have read the Dare book for anxiety or some of Claire Weeks stuff?

[[kp...]]

I second that Kpinsurvivor, the landing has been a lot better than expected. I still have a lot of symptoms, but nothing that would have been out of the ordinary during the taper; I do have less anxiety. I still feel like I'm going nuts because I'm not worried. 

 

I see you jumped from the oldschool benzo librium! How was that crossover???

 

I didn't really cross over, I had been using weekly 1 or 2 Mg hits of Klonpin a week for about 10 years, then I added Librax (Librium + Another Stomach Med) for 2 years every day.  And I drank 3-4 days a week.  So there was never really a cross over. I had tolerance from way back; In hindsight who knows how long I had tolerance withdrawal.

 

Fer, it sounds like you have read the Dare book for anxiety or some of Claire Weeks stuff?

 

Ah i gotcha. Tolerance w/d came when i crossed from xanax to klonopin. Mr dr wasnt too kind with me on my crossover from ~4mg xanax to 2mg klonopin but im glad it went that way. Id only be halfway through my taper coming from 4mg! 

[[Et...]]

I can imagine that hit from 4 to 2.    Fortunately we made it safely down to the jump. 

[[fe...]]

 

 

Fer, it sounds like you have read the Dare book for anxiety or some of Claire Weeks stuff?

 

No, In fact I do not know what it is that 

[[Et...]]

 

 

Fer, it sounds like you have read the Dare book for anxiety or some of Claire Weeks stuff?

 

No, In fact I do not know what it is that 

 

 

They’re great books for anxiety and one thing they teach you is what you said;I don’t think I’d be ok today without them. Dare by Barry Mcdonaugh and Hope and Help for your Nerves by Claire Weeks; I have the audiobooks and have to listen to them every couple of weeks.

[[fe...]]

Wow. That is interesting. Last week I was struggling with a bout of depression and suddenly I begin to exaggerate on purpose my "depressed" attitude trying to cry as loud as I can in a funny manner...and suddenly my sadness diminished a lot..in fact I ended up laughing a bit.

[[kp...]]

So happy so see everyone doing okay 

[[To...]]

Down to my last .10mg, ten days liquid micro tapering to go...

 

Sleep is becoming a problem, woke up after an hour last night - vivid, violent dream woke my wife up yelling out several times. Was pretty shaken and it took awhile to get back to sleep, woke up for good 3.5 restless hours later.

 

Has been awhile since this has happened (to this degree), although sleep quality has been a problem for the past year

- apnea and sleep disturbances (sometimes kicking/punching).

 

Had a flu shot and my first dose of crestor yesterday. Not sure that either contributed. Will have to keep a close eye on changes.

 

Temporary setback, not going to throw me off course. Probably part of "healing". Either that, or I have an underlying problem (sleep disorder). I'm scheduling a sleep study to find out.

[[...]]

I'm gonna throw Defiance in to this mix.

[[fe...]]

Sleeping bad also here. last night only slept for 4 hours and awakenings each hour. Wake up with a strong depression feeling, wanting to cry...nasty. 

[[Mi...]]

Sleeping bad also here. last night only slept for 4 hours and awakenings each hour. Wake up with a strong depression feeling, wanting to cry...nasty. 

 

I got very little sleep as well, high BP and heart rate even with BP/HR meds, then thought I saw someone sneaking up on me out of the corner of my eye and jumped out of my skin. My jump failed, I immediately went to get my Valium. I made it longer than I did before at least. I'm coming to terms that benzos is not a cold turkey drug until I get to lower doses good luck to everyone else I hope you all have success!

[[Et...]]

I also had a tough night, some new skin sensations an muscle twiches; nothing too bad. Day 4 after a cut is right where the first wave usually hits me, were not out of the woods yet but we'll get there. I actually had a pretty good afternoon, hope everyone is hanging in there. Like Challis says: "Ebb and Flow," we're in the ebb, hang in there and we'll get the flow. 

 

Also her advice on "distract, distract" works wonders. She's awesome. 

[[To...]]

Sleeping bad also here. last night only slept for 4 hours and awakenings each hour. Wake up with a strong depression feeling, wanting to cry...nasty. 

 

I got very little sleep as well, high BP and heart rate even with BP/HR meds, then thought I saw someone sneaking up on me out of the corner of my eye and jumped out of my skin. My jump failed, I immediately went to get my Valium. I made it longer than I did before at least. I'm coming to terms that benzos is not a cold turkey drug until I get to lower doses good luck to everyone else I hope you all have success!

So sorry to hear, Sicory -- get yourself stable and maybe taper yourself down gradually, hold, then gradually more.

[[To...]]

Sleeping bad also here. last night only slept for 4 hours and awakenings each hour. Wake up with a strong depression feeling, wanting to cry...nasty. 

Sleep issues have to be the top, or near the top, in benzo w/d sxs. Lack of sleep, heavy-head, burning eyes, grogginess, etc. can definitely make you feel depressed. Especially when it is night after night.

 

They say, over time, it comes back. Unfortunately, it takes a great deal of time.

 

Trying to take a nap is usually futile for me, but I did doze for about 45 minutes this afternoon and it helped somewhat. But, basically, today was kind of a lost day.

 

Hang in there, fer6638.

[[To...]]

I also had a tough night, some new skin sensations an muscle twiches; nothing too bad. Day 4 after a cut is right where the first wave usually hits me, were not out of the woods yet but we'll get there. I actually had a pretty good afternoon, hope everyone is hanging in there. Like Challis says: "Ebb and Flow," we're in the ebb, hang in there and we'll get the flow. 

 

Also her advice on "distract, distract" works wonders. She's awesome. 

A long journey for sure and you are right, we will get "there".