The Klonopin Klub#2

[[Fi...]]

Please encourage.  Significant stomach pain, hungry but no appitite for anything.  I hold and it's not stopping symptoms.  1.36 mg from compounding pharmacy now.  Constipation.  I have no will to go thru this a 4th time.

 

You can do this.  You are describing many classic benzo withdrawal symptoms. I've posted on this before because it happened to me.  Sometimes a certain cut or reaching a dose level can be harder than others. It's like your brain and body really notice the reduction in medication.  So the best course of action is to hold until you feel strong enough to continue your taper.  That doesn't mean your symptoms will go away entirely, it just means they become tolerable enough for you to continue. 

 

You aren't doing anything wrong nor does this mean you will never get off.  Hundreds of people have gotten off and many of them have tried it a couple of times till they did. You can be one of them. 

 

Final Healing

 

 

[[...]]

Final Healing,

 

Thanks for the encouraging post. I am in the midst of trying to stabilize after doing crazy things to taper. Trying different methods and not giving myself a break. I am 68 and so tired and weary, as well as down. I have always been positive, but this is brutal. AM I too old to be doing this?

I up dosed over a 2 year period because of antibiotic induced setback in 2020. I had to do a switch from Roche to Teva in June of 2021, as the brand was too strong and wearing off quick. The new Teva is not good, but there is no other option. In addition, when I was switching, my Mom got Covid and died. I had a lot to take care of by myself. I also have a brother who disabled in an ALF and I am his health care proxy. I am so discouraged by having to go up, but I had to function for my Mom back in 2020, as she had major surgery. I don't know if I will ever get off, but want to get down. I was doing great until May of 2020. I was below 2mg and had such hope.

I have done some major tapering not long after her death. I guess I should have just waited a year which will be the end of this month, to even think about tapering.

From Dec-Jan I did cut by .125mg-.0625mg each time and it was not too bad. It was cut and hold.

In March I I tried water for 3 days and that did not work. I immediately started started the weigh and crush off of my afternoon dose. Tried .125mg, then .0625mg and then .03mg. That was over 5 days and did not work, so I went back up to .5mg  to stabilize. That was on the 31st of March.

On April 17th I tried the crush and weigh again by .05mg from .5mg afternoon dose. I had to go back up to .5mg on May 9th.

In May I started doing the milk taper from the am and pm dose. That was from the 21st to the 30th.

On June 1st or there abouts I got advise from Libertas to just work on the afternoon dose which was good. I then decided to do a no waste taper which was a mistake and did that until June 21st.

I know now that it was not accurate and I probably compromised myself good. I felt good for a while and then all hell broke loose. I have not been in this state of withdrawal for so long. It is a month since being back on the pills and I still have some bad days.

I am figuring with all that I did to myself in my impatient and wanting to get down, that I screwed myself.

I just need encouragement that I will stabilize. It's not like me to keep tormenting myself.

Thanks for listening. 

 

Dana

[[Fi...]]

Final Healing,

 

Thanks for the encouraging post. I am in the midst of trying to stabilize after doing crazy things to taper. Trying different methods and not giving myself a break. I am 68 and so tired and weary, as well as down. I have always been positive, but this is brutal. AM I too old to be doing this?

I up dosed over a 2 year period because of antibiotic induced setback in 2020. I had to do a switch from Roche to Teva in June of 2021, as the brand was too strong and wearing off quick. The new Teva is not good, but there is no other option. In addition, when I was switching, my Mom got Covid and died. I had a lot to take care of by myself. I also have a brother who disabled in an ALF and I am his health care proxy. I am so discouraged by having to go up, but I had to function for my Mom back in 2020, as she had major surgery. I don't know if I will ever get off, but want to get down. I was doing great until May of 2020. I was below 2mg and had such hope.

I have done some major tapering not long after her death. I guess I should have just waited a year which will be the end of this month, to even think about tapering.

From Dec-Jan I did cut by .125mg-.0625mg each time and it was not too bad. It was cut and hold.

In March I I tried water for 3 days and that did not work. I immediately started started the weigh and crush off of my afternoon dose. Tried .125mg, then .0625mg and then .03mg. That was over 5 days and did not work, so I went back up to .5mg  to stabilize. That was on the 31st of March.

On April 17th I tried the crush and weigh again by .05mg from .5mg afternoon dose. I had to go back up to .5mg on May 9th.

In May I started doing the milk taper from the am and pm dose. That was from the 21st to the 30th.

On June 1st or there abouts I got advise from Libertas to just work on the afternoon dose which was good. I then decided to do a no waste taper which was a mistake and did that until June 21st.

I know now that it was not accurate and I probably compromised myself good. I felt good for a while and then all hell broke loose. I have not been in this state of withdrawal for so long. It is a month since being back on the pills and I still have some bad days.

I am figuring with all that I did to myself in my impatient and wanting to get down, that I screwed myself.

I just need encouragement that I will stabilize. It's not like me to keep tormenting myself.

Thanks for listening. 

 

Dana

 

Hi Dana,

 

One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was to choose one method of tapering and stick with it. I got that advice after I had tried switching my method of tapering a few times. I kept thinking that it was the method of tapering that was making it so hard instead of what it really was, which is plain old awful withdrawal.

 

So I chose my method, which for me was dry cut micro tapering with a scale. I would cut every two days and then hold when the cuts caught up with me. Once I felt strong enough, I would start again. As I mentioned above, being strong enough meant that I could handle the symptoms.

 

Try to be kind to yourself about the choices you made trying to taper. I ended up on benzos a second time due to a painful withdraw from another medication. It wasn't the choice I wanted to make but I made it out of panic and fear.  I still got off and so can you.

 

Don't count yourself out because of your age. There are people on this site who are 60 and above and have gotten off. I actually think there is a thread for that.

 

Find the method that works for you and stick with it.  Do a steady taper, holding when you need to and then starting again. Benzos are power medications and the fact that we struggle has nothing to do with a weak will or determination. It's the medication itself.

 

You have the right to be free of these meds.

 

Final Healing

[[je...]]

Dana,

 

I don't think you're too old to get off this stuff. I also think you should give yourself some credit for everything you've been through. You have taken care of your family and been there for them and it doesn't seem as if there really is anyone taking care of you. You had to do what you had to in order to get through life. I also think it took tremendous courage to experiment with different tapering methods. Very few people would have attempted what you did. It might not have worked out, but you know what, you TRIED something. Instead of doing nothing, you did something. I think you need to give yourself some crediat and be gentle and kind to yourself.

 

I do think this setback will settle eventually. I know a month feels like a lifetime, but ultimately your nervous system will balance out again. I also had a setback and it took me 6 weeks to stabilize (and I believe that was pretty quick in comparison to others). Some people take about 3 months or a bit longer.

 

Hang in there. It will get better!

[[...]]

Final Healing,

 

Thanks for your words of wisdom. I really have not taken it easy on myself. I have been on this road for so long and I am just discouraged, but there has to be hope.

I have never felt this bad since my being reinstated in the beginning from the C/T. Not for this long.

It has been 1 month today and I guess I need to give myself time to heal from this.

Once I go back to tapering, it will be the dry micro tapering.

May I ask what brand you took? Also, did you weigh more than 1 pill to get an average weight and then crush them?

I don't care how it takes to get off and I thought I was doing alright with the taper, but the liquid was inconsistent for me.

I thank you for encouraging me about my age. It does get harder as we older, for sure.

 

Dana

 

[[...]]

Dana,

 

I don't think you're too old to get off this stuff. I also think you should give yourself some credit for everything you've been through. You have taken care of your family and been there for them and it doesn't seem as if there really is anyone taking care of you. You had to do what you had to in order to get through life. I also think it took tremendous courage to experiment with different tapering methods. Very few people would have attempted what you did. It might not have worked out, but you know what, you TRIED something. Instead of doing nothing, you did something. I think you need to give yourself some crediat and be gentle and kind to yourself.

 

I do think this setback will settle eventually. I know a month feels like a lifetime, but ultimately your nervous system will balance out again. I also had a setback and it took me 6 weeks to stabilize (and I believe that was pretty quick in comparison to others). Some people take about 3 months or a bit longer.

 

Hang in there. It will get better!

 

 

 

Thank you again, jelly baby. I have tried since 1999 to get off of this and to the point of going to detox, because back in the 90's they had 1 support group that I didn't find until after my awful experience. That group saved my life. After reinstatement, I tapered down and was at 1.25mg.  Setbacks and life stressors out of my control have caused the up doses.

I am a retired RN and we are known not to put ourselves first. Always last. So yes, I have not been kind to myself and taking care of others. Thanks for the encouragement, again. I tend to overdo things. I had no one to help me with my Mom. I did hire a part time caregiver after I stayed with her at her apartment at an independent living facility for a month after she had 2 major abdominal surgeries in 2020. It was way too much, but I thought no one could take of her better. I got her back to health only to lose her last year. I have had quite a few stressful years. Thanks for letting me see that.

Thanks for reassuring me that I will get better. My husband is great and tries to help me with encouragement, but he does not understand the suffering. You and others here do.

 

Thanks again. I am very grateful.

 

Dana 

[[Fi...]]

Final Healing,

 

Thanks for your words of wisdom. I really have not taken it easy on myself. I have been on this road for so long and I am just discouraged, but there has to be hope.

I have never felt this bad since my being reinstated in the beginning from the C/T. Not for this long.

It has been 1 month today and I guess I need to give myself time to heal from this.

Once I go back to tapering, it will be the dry micro tapering.

May I ask what brand you took? Also, did you weigh more than 1 pill to get an average weight and then crush them?

I don't care how it takes to get off and I thought I was doing alright with the taper, but the liquid was inconsistent for me.

I thank you for encouraging me about my age. It does get harder as we older, for sure.

 

Dana

 

Hi Dana,

 

My brand was the Solco brand. I started with another brand but about 4 months into taking benzos again my pharmacy switched me. I then realized that pharmacists thought benzo brands were interchangeable. I got advice on this site to stay with the Solco brand because it was not one that was going to possible be pulled from the market. I made sure my psychiatrist specified the brand every time she prescribed it and I double checked when I picked it up. One time I didn't an I got another brand.

 

I weighed each pill I took with an average weight of 200 grams on the scale, which was equivalent to 0.5mgs of Klonopin. I then would shave down, using a metal nail file, to 199grams on the scale and then 198grams.  I shaved off one dose at a time, concentrating on my nighttime dose a thirst since it was heavier. When my doses were even, I the alternated each dose I cut till I stepped off.  I hoarded all my extra pieces of pills because I never wanted to be in a position of running out of meds for whatever reason.

 

I also could not do liquid though it works quite well for many.

 

Final Healing

[[In...]]

Hello All,

I've been on benzos since last September 2021 that I started as a result of anxiety and depression I thought would drive me mad. Little did I know what a mess I was getting myself into when I asked my psychiatrist for them. I now long for those pre-benzo times that are now the good old days in comparison. I did 2mg/day lorazepam and was switched to clonazepam 2mg/day in February 2022 by another psychiatrist in an outpatient behavioral health program I attended for six weeks. I decided I wanted to get off them sometime in late May 2022. I followed my psychiatrist's advice to cut down daily dose ( morning and mid afternoon) by .25mg every two weeks. When I made the cut from 1.25mg/day to 1mg/day things got really bad. I have now come to learn that going from 2 to 1mg/day in six weeks is way too fast. I've been too afraid to make another such cut because I am so miserable and barely able to function at work and not really funtioning at all with most other everyday things. I recently learned about water titration for tapering and changed things up three days ago. I took the two .5mg tabs I was taking per day, disolved them in 3ml vodka, added 97ml water to get a .01mg/ml solution of 100ml. I then cut that 100ml into three doses for a day (every 8 hours 6a, 2p, and 10p) because I thought that would smooth things out a bit. Today, three days later, I feel much worse, as if I made another big cut. Does anyone think this is temporary and that I'll go back to feeling the way I did when taking the 1mg/day in pill form? My goal is to stay at 1mg/day titration until I feel OK enough to start tapering down from that slowly. I feel so alone with all this; my psychiatrist won't switch me to diazepam, thinks that clonazepam has a longer half life, and obviously knows little to nothing about how long it takes so many of us to taper down. At least she's going to keep giving me the 1mg/day of clonazepam, so I suppose I'll have to taper off using that. For me, I know it's not just about getting off benzos but also about hopefully learning to cope with the feelings that drove me to them in the first place. Take care, and good luck to us all.

[[je...]]

There are a couple of things in your post I can comment on, but first I want to ask if you can Add your history/signature. Since you've gone from 2mg to 1mg in such a short time frame,  I wouldn't start tapering right now. If I were you I'd go back to 1mg pills and hold there for a couple of weeks to allow my brain to catch up. We have a saying here that goes "heal faster than you taper".

 

When it comes to liquid tapering there are a lot of variables to consider. Some people struggle with liquid others not. Generally we recommend you start a liquid taper without tapering just to see how your body is responding to the liquid. That way you know you're responding to the liquid not the cuts.

 

Another thing to remember is whenever we make homebrew mixes we alter the way the pill has been manufactured. You would want to eliminate as much interference as possible thereby taking as much of the pill in its original shape. For example,  I have 0.5mg pills that are scored in quarters. For a 1mg titration I would then take 0.875 in pill format and only titrate 0.125mg in liquid. This limits DIY interference and issues to the minimum. I hope I've been able to express myself clearly. You've made some great progress, I think you just need to hold for a while until things settle down.

[[Bo...]]

Hi Jelly Baby…. Are your quarter scores .5mg pulls Klonopin? If so who is manufacturer? I could only get the .5 scored in half and if for some reason I have to go back to pill format (I’m on month 3 of comp liquid), thsi would be great to know.

Thank you!!

[[je...]]

If you're on a compounding liquid from a pharmacy then it's is much better than any DIY liquid method. May I ask, why did you swap to water?

 

I live in Australia and my brand is Paxam.

[[Ch...]]

Please encourage.  Significant stomach pain, hungry but no appitite for anything.  I hold and it's not stopping symptoms.  1.36 mg from compounding pharmacy now.  Constipation.  I have no will to go thru this a 4th time.

 

You can do this.  You are describing many classic benzo withdrawal symptoms. I've posted on this before because it happened to me.  Sometimes a certain cut or reaching a dose level can be harder than others. It's like your brain and body really notice the reduction in medication.  So the best course of action is to hold until you feel strong enough to continue your taper.  That doesn't mean your symptoms will go away entirely, it just means they become tolerable enough for you to continue. 

 

You aren't doing anything wrong nor does this mean you will never get off.  Hundreds of people have gotten off and many of them have tried it a couple of times till they did. You can be one of them. 

 

Final Healing

 

Final Healing thank you for the encouragement.  I'm now on liquid from compounding pharmacy, but I'm more constipated than with scaling tablets.  Either way it seems I hurt in the tummy area, but I can't tell which is better.  May I ask what brand you were on?  I'm on Teva.  I'm wondering if I should go back to cutting tablets.  I am so scared and sad. 

[[Li...]]

Hello, Charlene.

 

Per her previous post below, the manufacturer of the tablets Final healing used was Solco.

 

 

My brand was the Solco brand. I started with another brand but about 4 months into taking benzos again my pharmacy switched me. I then realized that pharmacists thought benzo brands were interchangeable. I got advice on this site to stay with the Solco brand because it was not one that was going to possible be pulled from the market. I made sure my psychiatrist specified the brand every time she prescribed it and I double checked when I picked it up. One time I didn't an I got another brand.

 

I weighed each pill I took with an average weight of 200 grams on the scale, which was equivalent to 0.5mgs of Klonopin. I then would shave down, using a metal nail file, to 199grams on the scale and then 198grams.  I shaved off one dose at a time, concentrating on my nighttime dose a thirst since it was heavier. When my doses were even, I the alternated each dose I cut till I stepped off.  I hoarded all my extra pieces of pills because I never wanted to be in a position of running out of meds for whatever reason.

 

I also could not do liquid though it works quite well for many.

 

Final Healing

[[Ch...]]

Hello, Charlene.

 

Per her previous post below, the manufacturer of the tablets Final healing used was Solco.

 

 

My brand was the Solco brand. I started with another brand but about 4 months into taking benzos again my pharmacy switched me. I then realized that pharmacists thought benzo brands were interchangeable. I got advice on this site to stay with the Solco brand because it was not one that was going to possible be pulled from the market. I made sure my psychiatrist specified the brand every time she prescribed it and I double checked when I picked it up. One time I didn't an I got another brand.

 

I weighed each pill I took with an average weight of 200 grams on the scale, which was equivalent to 0.5mgs of Klonopin. I then would shave down, using a metal nail file, to 199grams on the scale and then 198grams.  I shaved off one dose at a time, concentrating on my nighttime dose a thirst since it was heavier. When my doses were even, I the alternated each dose I cut till I stepped off.  I hoarded all my extra pieces of pills because I never wanted to be in a position of running out of meds for whatever reason.

 

I also could not do liquid though it works quite well for many.

 

Final Healing

 

Libertas, do you think certain brands are better than others?  I wonder if they have Solco in the US.  I have Teva.  Have you heard of people doing better on Solco?  I'm not sure I can stay with the compounding liquid.  He uses pure clonazapam and something called Suspendit.  I'm going to continue a little bit more (It will be 14 days on Wed.).  Thank you for the reply.

[[Li...]]

Charlene: According to DailyMed, Solco is available in the US.  I have read about individuals who do well on it as well as others who do not.  It all depends on the individual.

[[Ch...]]

Charlene: According to DailyMed, Solco is available in the US.  I have read about individuals who do well on it as well as others who do not.  It all depends on the individual.

 

Thank you again Libertas

[[Li...]]

You’re most welcome, Charlene.

[[he...]]

Libertas, do you think certain brands are better than others?  I wonder if they have Solco in the US.  I have Teva.  Have you heard of people doing better on Solco?  I'm not sure I can stay with the compounding liquid.  He uses pure clonazapam and something called Suspendit.  I'm going to continue a little bit more (It will be 14 days on Wed.).  Thank you for the reply.

 

I've made myself crazy wondering if the manufacturer I use is decent. I really don't know. My tablets are made by Accord.  You can go on Google and find negative and positive reviews about all of them, Solco included. It worked for Final healing, but some others have had issues. A lot of people are using Teva, because it's so prevalent right now at the major pharmacies. I've often wondered if I would be doing better on Teva than Accord, but everyone says stick to the same manufacturer in your taper, so I have. I struggled doing a liquid. I tried a professionally compounded version of my tablets and couldn't do it, at least not back when I was higher in dose. I hope it works great for you. Unfortunately some of us will have unpleasant symptoms, while tapering, no mater what.

[[...]]

We are so individual, so that what brand works for 1 may not work well for another.

It is best to stick with what you are on as the brain likes predictability. I think there are definitely variations in batches and even pills, at least for me. I think the Roche is the most consistent.

I take Teva and have for 12 years. I have also taken the Roche when Teva was discontinued temporarily. The new Teva is nothing like the old.

I switched to Teva because I was on Purpac and Qualitest  years back. They worked great.

In 2010 I was given a batch of Mylan and within 3 days I was in withdrawal. I thought nothing of the new green pills until all hell broke loose.  I found Teva and was very happy with it. Now, I just have to deal with the less than acceptable effects of the new drug.

I had a scare this past week as my Pharmacy had no Pharmacist for a few days and the floaters kept ordering the other brand that they carry. Finally, the new manager Pharmacist got it in and I picked up today. They special order for me, as I am the only one who takes it.

My old pharmacist is at the other CVS which is a couple of miles away and he told me he would take care of me if things don't stay good at this pharmacy, which I have used for the past 12 years. 

The Roche works, but I found it too strong and it did not last as long. If I have to take to survive, I will. Less choices these days.

[[he...]]

I'm sorry for all the changes you've had to endure, Dana.

 

The Accord obviously works, otherwise I wouldn't be in the position I'm in, but I've wondered if the fillers in it give me any symptoms I might not have otherwise. I know some have switched and done better due to the other ingredients in the tablets that were making them sick. I imagine, though, I'd probably do worse on Teva after being on Accord this long. Who knows? None of these pills are as quality as we wish they were or as they should be.

[[Sh...]]

Hi! Anyone experiencing throat issues? Like trouble swallowing, and throat feeling sore or like a lump. And kind of like the throat muscles are weak after swallowing. This symptom is scaring the life out of me. I’ve had this for months and I don’t know how much longer I can endure this. Please shed some light if you’ve had this symptom or currently have it now. I need reassurance that this is “normal/common” and it will go away. Thank you!!!

[[Fi...]]

Hi! Anyone experiencing throat issues? Like trouble swallowing, and throat feeling sore or like a lump. And kind of like the throat muscles are weak after swallowing. This symptom is scaring the life out of me. I’ve had this for months and I don’t know how much longer I can endure this. Please shed some light if you’ve had this symptom or currently have it now. I need reassurance that this is “normal/common” and it will go away. Thank you!!!

 

I  did not have this issue but I have found that if you never had the issue before and it cropped up during withdrawal, then its something about withdrawal.

 

It reminds me a little of "air hunger", which is a common symptom in withdrawal. Its a feeling of gasping or swallowing all the time. It disappears at some point with after you get off or as you get lower.

[[Ul...]]

Hi! Anyone experiencing throat issues? Like trouble swallowing, and throat feeling sore or like a lump. And kind of like the throat muscles are weak after swallowing. This symptom is scaring the life out of me. I’ve had this for months and I don’t know how much longer I can endure this. Please shed some light if you’ve had this symptom or currently have it now. I need reassurance that this is “normal/common” and it will go away. Thank you!!!

 

I  did not have this issue but I have found that if you never had the issue before and it cropped up during withdrawal, then its something about withdrawal.

 

It reminds me a little of "air hunger", which is a common symptom in withdrawal. Its a feeling of gasping or swallowing all the time. It disappears at some point with after you get off or as you get lower.

 

Hi Final!! I hope you're doing great these days

 

Jeff

[[he...]]

Man, I just don't feel like I'm ever going to get off this stupid drug. I've had to slow down multiple times. We've been out of our house for nearly two months due to repairs that stopped while we battled with insurance. That's been a huge stressor in addition to other things.

 

I've gone from 6.3% / 14 to 6.1% to 5.5% to 5% and now to 4%, hopefully temporarily. I'm down to .262 mg today. It's soooo slow, and I only took it PRN and then daily for less than 4 months before I started tapering. I really think I screwed up and should've tried harder to get off more quickly in the beginning. I don't know...I was already having symptoms. That probably made it impossible to do. I'm just suffering so much now. I think about jumping off all the time now just to get the crap out of my system and start healing. People have definitely CTed and healed faster than some on a slow taper. That's hard to accept.

 

</rant>

[[Fi...]]

Hi! Anyone experiencing throat issues? Like trouble swallowing, and throat feeling sore or like a lump. And kind of like the throat muscles are weak after swallowing. This symptom is scaring the life out of me. I’ve had this for months and I don’t know how much longer I can endure this. Please shed some light if you’ve had this symptom or currently have it now. I need reassurance that this is “normal/common” and it will go away. Thank you!!!

 

I  did not have this issue but I have found that if you never had the issue before and it cropped up during withdrawal, then its something about withdrawal.

 

It reminds me a little of "air hunger", which is a common symptom in withdrawal. Its a feeling of gasping or swallowing all the time. It disappears at some point with after you get off or as you get lower.

 

Hi Final!! I hope you're doing great these days

 

Jeff

 

Hi Jeff,

 

I was doing pretty well but have a small setback/wave due to surgery. I had a string reaction to the anesthesia and it impacted my still sensitive nervous system. I'm working my way through it but its been hard at times.

 

I hope you are continuing to feel better and better. You worked really hard and deserve it.