Your Appearance in w/d

[[eg...]]

Interesting and helpful to come across this thread. The other day I was looking at myself - really seeing how old I look compared to when I started this taper. I do not feel at home in my body. I am thinking of 'rewarding" myself for completing the taper  with some cosmetic surgery on my face/neck.

Who knew that  looking different would be so devastating.

[[MT...]]

ET, I think it's an external representation of the losses associated with wd. It's visible when so much of our other suffering is invisible. Sometimes I think we can feel more empowered with the external stuff (like appearance) because we can dress differently, put on make-up, fix hair, even get surgery, but the other aspects of wd there's not much we can do about (other than good self care, exercise, healthy eating, etc. but those have limited reach). All of this is devastating

[[xa...]]

Interesting and helpful to come across this thread. The other day I was looking at myself - really seeing how old I look compared to when I started this taper. I do not feel at home in my body. I am thinking of 'rewarding" myself for completing the taper  with some cosmetic surgery on my face/neck.

Who knew that  looking different would be so devastating.

 

You might wait a few months after the taper is finished. Some benzodrugged experienced a natural face recovery in their testimonies.

[[no...]]

Hi all my hair is now growing well and the bad fall out seems to have stopped, I wondered if the fact I eat Buckwheat was a help and found this link, http://www.stylecraze.com/articles/amazing-benefits-of-buckwheat-for-skin-hair-and-health/ Also I think that potatoes may be a big cause of my big  rotund and heavy weight Benzo belly so I'm cutting them out of my diet to see if it helps. 

 

I went a day without them as I eat them regular and my Benzo Belly was a lot better, so I'm now waiting to see if this was coincidence or not, and I am now  trying to accept that this is me for now until things get better naturally in time, and learn to love the face I have instead of getting wrapped up and buying in to in the  ''Beauty industry'. 

 

Where aging or physically looking unwell because you are is a sin not a natural progression of life, creation its self and that vanity means absolutely nothing in the great plan of the universe. You can have the most beautiful face and body on this planet, but that doesn't equate happiness or good health, I was thinking about this today when I went out for a walk this morning.

 

About how beautiful life and nature is when you feel good and peaceful inside and I didn't give my appearance a second thought except to wonder am I being shallow giving my physical appearance so much credence when I am surrounded by true beauty, looking good and feeling good really are worlds apart

 

Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[no...]]

I would like to add in relation to m last post that I eat a really good organic diet, drink raw milk and eat grass fed organic meat, and  drink only spring water, and only added the buckwheat to my diet six week to eight weeks ago.

 

 

Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[no...]]

 

For those of you considering Botox please read this.

 

Nova xxxx  :smitten:

 

 

   

Viking

Gender: Female

    Trying to be patient

   

Botox during withdrawal.....UTTERLY DISASTROUS

« on: April 29, 2015, 07:12:32 pm »

 

    Quote

 

Dear Buddies

I haven't posted for nearly 18 months.

it is 3 years since I stopped benzos and right now I should be well or almost well.

 

During my first year of wd I got muscle spasms and other things. I became sensitive to medications and supplements.

Then UTIs. Then oesophageal spasms and terrible chest pain...which was investigated and I was told I had only 10 per cent of my motility left. Doctors were puzzled as no diseases etc.

 

For many years I had had Botox in the forehead every 3 or 4 months and was told it was "perfectly safe" and impossible to react to. No warnings given because side effects were impossible.

 

WRONG. I had final injection 18 months ago and my body collapsed and I could not walk and I ended up in hospital. Eventually walked again but for the last 18 months I have been in hell.

 

Worse, so much worse and scarier than benzo withdrawal, can you believe it. It will take me years to recover, I am advised.

 

People with neural issues (including motor neurone) are warned by responsible doctors not to risk Botox.  I now get it that BENZO WITHDRAWAL FOR SOME, is a neural  issue.

My life has been wrecked.

 

Benzos made me sensitive and I should not have believed the doctor injecting me, and I was foolish to not recognise that Botox is a drug, which might have been fine for years but which eventually can kick you hard (sometimes kills people). Allergan sets it out clearly these things in its written warnings, which I wish I had been offered to read.

 

Viking 😪

>Report This Post<  Logged

Accidentally got hooked on ativan July 2011 after 5 weeks on 1mg - 2mg daily. Tapered down over 5 months. Final dose on 2 April 2012!!!!!

As at September 2013  I am 18 months off. Still revving every time take other melds, which is most of the time.

[[Al...]]

I've had BOTOX twice since recovery and I never had ONE s/x from it. If I had I would never have had it a second time.  If you read the Ashton Manual Dr Ashton's mentions getting Botox. My husband is a Plastic Surgeon and he would never give it to me if it would make my recovery worse. Please see what Dr. Ashton says about getting Botox. If she feels that you can get it you can!! Everyone is different, everyone heals differently and everyone metabolizes a benzo differently. No two people on this forum are alike!

 

I went out last night in NYC with friends who have no idea that I went off a Benzo. They have not seen me since December. The first thing they said was how great I looked and I looked very rested. As you heal your appearance returns.

 

Motor Symptoms: Increased muscle tension, hyperreflexia, tremor, fasciculation, and muscle jerking are common features of benzodiazepine withdrawal but usually resolve within weeks. Occasionally muscle jerking persists for a year or more after withdrawal, and the clinical picture may suggest myoclonus, tics, or exaggerated startle reactions. Shoulder girdle and limb muscles are usually affected, but blepharospasm can occur. Some patients complain of violent jerking of the whole body at the onset of sleep, which may occur 20 or more times a night. Restless legs syndrome may also be protracted. Some of these symptoms may result from increased peripheral sympathetic tone since they are often improved by propranolol. Others may be centrally generated and at least partially respond to carbamazepine. Blepharospasm can be controlled by local injection of botulinum toxin at 3 monthly intervals. Protracted motor symptoms such as these raise the possibility that benzodiazepines are capable of causing long-term hyperexcitability of motoneurons or central motor pathways.

[[MT...]]

Fran, perhaps it has to do with how severe your wd is from benzos to begin with. Also, what I'm seeing from what you quoted of Ashton is that botox might be helpful in the very small area to correct an eye twitch. That wouldn't be the same cumulative dose you would receive if you were getting it for other reasons. Some of us may experience some immune dysfunction secondary to the wd that could put us at higher risk. Any stress can diminish our immune systems so it makes sense to me that there is some risk involved. Doctors I'm familiar with talk about the advantages of botox but also that there is a small risk (that can be higher for certain populations).

[[Al...]]

MTFAN- Botox is just a few very tiny injections. I would base my decision upon Ashton rather than anyone else's opinion. After all she wrote the Benzo manual.

[[Br...]]

Fran, perhaps it has to do with how severe your wd is from benzos to begin with. Also, what I'm seeing from what you quoted of Ashton is that botox might be helpful in the very small area to correct an eye twitch. That wouldn't be the same cumulative dose you would receive if you were getting it for other reasons. Some of us may experience some immune dysfunction secondary to the wd that could put us at higher risk. Any stress can diminish our immune systems so it makes sense to me that there is some risk involved. Doctors I'm familiar with talk about the advantages of botox but also that there is a small risk (that can be higher for certain populations).

 

Hello MTfan.  Would there be accumulation of botox if subsequent doses are being used to replace previous doses which have dissipated?  Presumably that is why subsequent doses are applied.

 

I don't actually know the likelihood of botox affecting an existing immune dysfunction but if that occurs then wouldn't that happen independently of benzos?  I can understand that benzos and their withdrawal (like any other long term stress on the nervous system) could sometimes amplify any nervous system symptoms but I am not clear if they would be its cause in this case.

 

 

 

 

 

[[no...]]

 

For those of you considering Botox please read this.

 

Nova xxxx  :smitten:

 

 

   

Viking

Gender: Female

    Trying to be patient

   

Botox during withdrawal.....UTTERLY DISASTROUS

« on: April 29, 2015, 07:12:32 pm »

 

    Quote

 

Dear Buddies

I haven't posted for nearly 18 months.

it is 3 years since I stopped benzos and right now I should be well or almost well.

 

During my first year of wd I got muscle spasms and other things. I became sensitive to medications and supplements.

Then UTIs. Then oesophageal spasms and terrible chest pain...which was investigated and I was told I had only 10 per cent of my motility left. Doctors were puzzled as no diseases etc.

 

For many years I had had Botox in the forehead every 3 or 4 months and was told it was "perfectly safe" and impossible to react to. No warnings given because side effects were impossible.

 

WRONG. I had final injection 18 months ago and my body collapsed and I could not walk and I ended up in hospital. Eventually walked again but for the last 18 months I have been in hell.

 

Worse, so much worse and scarier than benzo withdrawal, can you believe it. It will take me years to recover, I am advised.

 

People with neural issues (including motor neurone) are warned by responsible doctors not to risk Botox.  I now get it that BENZO WITHDRAWAL FOR SOME, is a neural  issue.

My life has been wrecked.

 

Benzos made me sensitive and I should not have believed the doctor injecting me, and I was foolish to not recognise that Botox is a drug, which might have been fine for years but which eventually can kick you hard (sometimes kills people). Allergan sets it out clearly these things in its written warnings, which I wish I had been offered to read.

 

Viking 😪

>Report This Post<  Logged

Accidentally got hooked on ativan July 2011 after 5 weeks on 1mg - 2mg daily. Tapered down over 5 months. Final dose on 2 April 2012!!!!!

 

 

 

As at September 2013  I am 18 months off. Still revving every time take other melds, which is most of the time.

 

 

 

I'd rather believe the person thats been there than a chemist 'theory'' like ALL drugs the many long term effects are relatively  unknown and the short term effects are covered up, there is no such thing as a 'safe' drug, anything outside of what creation puts in to making organic beings is not safe in our bodies period.

 

Unfortunately its too late now to realize that people that hold pieces of paper ''certificates'' that give them a ''Title/Label'' are not ''Gods'' of their jobs , just other people and  are just as if not more infallible as the rest of us mere mortals. After all they with best memory passes the exams not they who are best suited for the job, this is true in every profession on this planet.

 

 

Many lay persons would be amazing Doctors, Pharmacist without a piece of paper to prove it and better than most who do have a piece of paper that proves they remembered all the answers to the questions or cheated like many people do. Thanks to all our wonderful technology people can sit an exam with an invisible device where a person mile away can read the exam questions  and rely the answers to them via some gadget???

 

And many Doctor,. Pharmacologist. Scientist etc admit the were wrong never mind the number of people maimed or killed by their ''mistake' being take as gospel because 'That's THEIR job and wtf do the rest of us know???

 

And as Vikings already pointed out in her post Allergan, Inc. an American worldwide pharmaceutical company, focusing on ophthalmic pharmaceuticals, dermatology, neuroscience, urology and cosmetics who manufacturer Botox  amongst many ''cosmetic formulas'''' have  set it out clearly these  in its written warnings.

 

Just a couple of videos below of Doctors doing U-turns on their original 'set in stone advice'' and others exposing lies and corruption and serious health damage. They may not be ''Botox'' orientated but the ''theme'' is the same just a different substance but these are 'of nature'' not man made lab manufactured chemical compositions. This link is ''Botox'' orientated and its full of warnings http://www.botoxcosmetic.com/

Doctor Who Started Gluten-Free Fad Says He Got It Wrong  http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/doctor-started-gluten-free-fad-wrong-23840150

Dr Michael Eades and others  exposes the lies and corruption about the  saturated fat  and cholesterol is bad  for you https://vimeo.com/77730824

 

 

 

Nova xxxx  :smitten:

[[no...]]

This is the PDF link http://www.allergan.com/assets/pdf/botox_cosmetic_pi.pdf pdf of Product Information including Boxed Warning from Allergan.  Amongst the warnings is it also causes Dysphagia means swallowing difficulties, and usually caused by nerve or muscle problems. Dysphagia may occur after a stroke, throat and mouth cancer, gastro-oesophageal reflux disease (GORD), or as a symptoms of several different neurological disorders.

 

Pain can be the sole cause of dysphagia; a pain in the throat makes swallowing difficult. However, dysphagia can be distinguished from similar symptoms including odynophagia, which is defined as painful swallowing, and globus, when the patient feels a lump in the throat. Although the medical term - dysphagia - is known as a symptoms or sign in most medical criteria, it can and is sometimes used as a condition in its own right.

 

I have 'Dysphagia'' caused by Benzos and end up blue in the face from choking on liquids and food getting caught in my wind pipe as my throat spasms and locks up tight with no warning and I end up fighting to breathe to stay alive just to go with all the other 'wonderful'' sxs??

 

And its nearly killed me and is getting much worse as I taper. My throat closes up as I'm dropping off to sleep and when I'm actually sleeping  The term "dysphagia" comes from the Greek root word dys which means "difficulty or disordered", and phagia meaning "to eat".    And this is ''The Mediation guide'' from Allergan http://www.allergan.com/assets/pdf/botox_med_guide.pdf

 

 

 

Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[MT...]]

Interesting stuff, Nova. Crazy to hear that the gluten-free thing was initiated for invalid reasons. I feel guilty sometimes for eating gluten again but I honestly haven't noticed a difference. I do try to eat healthy grains and it's hard to get those healthy, whole grains on the GF diet.

[[eg...]]

Nova,

Thanks for the warning about Botox. I saw the plastic surgeon today but did not get anything done--I come home and read this. Sheez..I am so wrecked lately and thought if I looked better I would feel better. I am so sensitive right now.

[[Je...]]

Guys, I have been going through this same thing.  I used to post pics of myself on facebook all the time now I feel so sickley and unattractive that I rarely do anymore.  I caught myself looking at old pics to see if I look any different and I don't! It is my awful perception that has changed!

[[no...]]

Hi all  I am bumping this thread on account that there are a lot other people scared as to whats happening them physically appearance wise so they are reassured that their not the only one and that its all benzo related and will get better in time

 

Bump!

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[Se...]]

Can only speak for myself, but having botulinum toxin (botox) administered, especially now, with the existing benzo-induced central nervous system damage, would be the absolute furthest thing from my mind, for what I believe are reasons quite obvious.

 

No need to add gasoline to an already raging fire.

[[Se...]]

By the way, I am noticing some small improvements in my appearance, as of last month or so.  I've still a ways to go, but my eyes are clearing up (used to be red-rimmed, dry, droopy & bloodshot.) 

[[MT...]]

By the way, I am noticing some small improvements in my appearance, as of last month or so.  I've still a ways to go, but my eyes are clearing up (used to be red-rimmed, dry, droopy & bloodshot.) 

 

Glad to hear it, Serenity. You're making steady progress!

[[Ro...]]

I sure can relate.  I thought my hair was damaged, too dry and straw like.  Feels awful to me.  Just had a consult with a high class salon and she said my hair is in good condition and very soft.  Is this because our cns is not yet back to normal and our increased sensitivities?  My sense of touch, hearing and taste are out of whack.  I am way too sensitive and reactive.  Food tastes soooo good!  I am one who has to watch what I eat now more than ever. 

[[Je...]]

My self esteem as of late has been pretty low...

My boyfriend thinks he is being "helpful" by telling me things that can burn belly fat.

I don't have belly fat,I have benzo belly that comes and goes,and nothing his skinny ass suggests is going to fix that.

It's summertime and I don't feel comfortable wearing a bikini.

 

Maybe if my boyfriend wasn't so critical I wouldn't feel so bad.

 

 

 

[[Al...]]

JeweyA-I too had the benzo belly and it reminded me when I was 16 weeks pregnant. I made sure not to eat any carbs (I normally don't). The good news is that it abated after one week. Rest assure it will abate.

[[Ca...]]

I have gained 50 lbs. i too have felt like my looks took a turn for the worst. Sun spots even showed up on my face. BUT in windows they go away & I look myself again (just w/ some extra weight).... So I do think we can implement get our looks back & even better.

[[Al...]]

Yesterday I attended a 50th birthday. I have not seen several of the women at the party for a very long time. I received compliments about my appearance. I want everyone to know as you heal your appearance will come back. Please stay positive and know that you will heal and you will look wonderful again It does get better.

[[Se...]]

I always wore makeup.  I've liked putting on makeup since I was a teen.  Not so much on weekends, but during the week... for school and work.

 

Since the w/d, it is nearly impossible to even think about doing my face or hair.  It's very odd.  I don't really go anywhere anyway, but I've simply found I don't have the motivation or desire to do anything but throw a bit of lip-balm on my chapped lips when I have to go out.  Anything more than that seems to be a monumental task that saps energy I don't seem to have right now.