The Klonopin Klub

[[re...]]

Good evening, folks -

 

I haven't checked in for a couple of days or so--sort of went into Thanksgiving hibernation.  I've been thinking about you all, wishing everyone relief, for the holiday and beyond. 

 

And I hope everyone gets some sleep tonight.

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[pe...]]

Hi KK,

I hope you've all had a nice weekend and are feeling positive about the week ahead. I had a nice holiday with my family. I wasn't sure how it would all go. We hosted two dinners and had my sister as a house guest for several days. I found myself smiling a lot and able to enjoy a few hours each day. I'm worn out from all the activity, but going into another cut and am hopeful tapering will be behind me soon.

 

Njoy and Colorado - thanks for weighing in on my last post. You're both provide the kind and honest feedback that keeps me moving in the right direction.  I mostly have manageable symptoms, but they're always there. Often enough, they are dialed down to the degree needed for me to work and participate in my family. That's probably as good as it gets for now.

 

Rek - Thanks always for checking in. I can't tell you the good vibes I pick up from your posts. 

 

Terraform- Thanks for coming back and spreading the good news. I love that you're feeling so fantastic you had to put it all in caps lock. I'm working toward heading your way!

[[Fl...]]

Hi there Klonopin Klub.  Today I am free after a two year taper!  Thank you for all your support!

love,

Flutterbye

[[Ju...]]

Congrats flutterbye!

I am one month out from Valium and three weeks out from remeron. I am not sleeping and today I witnessed what happens when I can't hold up my part in the family- it involved lots of shouting and crying. I am about to let my doc experiment on me again with anything nonbenzo. I just can't take it anymore.

[[Co...]]

flutterbye,

 

Wow! Congratulations!!! I love to read this kind of post. It makes the rest of us that are trailing behind you realize that our day will come.

 

Good on you from Colorado :thumbsup:

[[Fl...]]

Congrats flutterbye!

I am one month out from Valium and three weeks out from remeron. I am not sleeping and today I witnessed what happens when I can't hold up my part in the family- it involved lots of shouting and crying. I am about to let my doc experiment on me again with anything nonbenzo. I just can't take it anymore.

JustKeepSwimming; thank you for the congrats!  I know the family stress is difficult.  I was feeling it myself the other night somewhat and I tend to think irrational thoughts like I am leaving home or something.  I am better now than two years ago when still in tolerance wd and not knowing what was wrong with me.  I cried all the time and did not know why.  Now I know what is happening and I can see it for what it is.  The other night I went to bed and ya know the next day was a whole new day.  Good things happened that day and I was so glad I pushed the irrational thoughts away and recognized them as such.  I hope you can take time to breathe and see what the light of a new day brings before you make any decisions about meds or anything else. I wish you peace,

Thanks again,

Flutterbye

[[aw...]]

Flutterbye:

Good for you  I like the part about FREE...and coming up on my one year taper anniversary at < 50% done, I like the part about 2 years also!

 

Aweigh

[[re...]]

Good morning, all -

 

1,000 congratulations, Flutterbye!  And may the transition be as smooth as possible for you!

 

Peace2, I know I speak for all of us here in saying I'm so glad you were able to enjoy the holiday--holidays can be tough to negotiate even at the best of times, and the more precarious when benzos are in on the act.

 

As JKS can attest, alas.  JKS, I know only too well the desperation that protracted sleeplessness brings.  After about two weeks of sleeping either not at all or, at most, an hour or an hour-and-a-half at night, back in 2012, I felt psychotic.  That was the part of the benzo experience, I think, that turned me into someone I no longer recognized.  I am so sorry you're going through it, too--I hope the doctor can help.  If something works, I'd say go with it cautiously.  My own strategy was to use what worked for as long as it worked, then stop when it stopped working.  I do so hope you get relief soon.  We all do.

 

Must cede the computer to my husband.  I hope everyone finds windows today -

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[Fl...]]

flutterbye,

 

Wow! Congratulations!!! I love to read this kind of post. It makes the rest of us that are trailing behind you realize that our day will come.

 

Good on you from Colorado :thumbsup:

Hey there Colorado chick,

Thanks so much for your well wishes!  We are all on a journey and will get there.  Your day will come!!  Keep on moving forward and believing.  Love your name by the way!  Well I love Colorado.  always thought I'd move there when I was young.

thanks again,

Flutterbye

[[De...]]

Klonopin is no joke. I'm at  7 months off of my second C/T from 6mg daily and it's rough. Symptoms can basicly be pinned down to constant anxiety/panic, anhedonia, intense brain fog, and electrical zaps in my head. What made it even worse I'm a recovering heroin addict and trying to starve off intense cravings is next to impossible when the benzo side effects are triggering them every second of every day. My symptoms as of a month ago are the same but seem a lot more manageable since I got onto Suboxone (Buphenorphine). Not sure if my anxiety is down due to the raw effects of pumping a synthetic opiate into my system or just from having my cravings for heroin suppressed, but I'm thankful none the less. Seems like my symptoms would trigger a craving and a craving would exacerbate my symptoms.. vicious cycle. 

[[li...]]

Congrats flutterbye!

I am one month out from Valium and three weeks out from remeron. I am not sleeping and today I witnessed what happens when I can't hold up my part in the family- it involved lots of shouting and crying. I am about to let my doc experiment on me again with anything nonbenzo. I just can't take it anymore.

 

I really can relate.  I felt I reached a new level of insanity when I came off suboxone. 

Not only could I not sleep but I seemed totally 'wired'.  I had a really short fuse, especially with my hub.

At the time, I was prescribed trazadone ... but, thankfully, I never filled the script after I researched it. 

Very, very gradually, JKS, my sleep returned without drugs.

Only you know best ..... but for me, it was worth the non "doc experiment" route.

I did find juicing and walking helped ..... simple but effective.

 

Flutter ... congratulations again!  I left a message on your blog.

 

Hi to everyone, of course!  I am so out of touch here ....

Benzo wise, I am doing well.  I have had a few other challenges ... but as far as withdrawal goes ... it ends!!!!!

Hope that encourages all of you.  Yes .... it ends. 

 

Take care everyone ....

Lizie   

[[De...]]

 

I really can relate.  I felt I reached a new level of insanity when I came off suboxone. 

 

 

Do you still get cravings for the dope? Me, I have no plans to get off maintenance, ever. I was taking painkillers at 13 and shooting heroin by 16 (20 now) so it might be hardwired into my head more so than the average joe.. but it seems to me that with there being no cure for addiction that treating the side affects (cravings) with Buphenorphine is the next best thing. Just see a lot of people obsessing over the idea of getting off the Bupe to needlessly fight off cravings for however long then go right back to the dope.. only to repeat the process over again.

[[li...]]

 

I really can relate.  I felt I reached a new level of insanity when I came off suboxone. 

 

 

Do you still get cravings for the dope? Me, I have no plans to get off maintenance, ever. I was taking painkillers at 13 and shooting heroin by 16 (20 now) so it might be hardwired into my head more so than the average joe.. but it seems to me that with there being no cure for addiction that treating the side affects (cravings) with Buphenorphine is the next best thing. Just see a lot of people obsessing over the idea of getting off the Bupe to needlessly fight off cravings for however long then go right back to the dope.. only to repeat the process over again.

 

I never had cravings, Dead End, so that wasn't a factor for me.

I was on narcotics for nerve pain, and long term they gave me hyperalgesia.

 

Wishing you the best,

Lizie

[[Co...]]

Dead end,

 

I get what you say about klonopin. I took it for 22 years w/o having a clue about benzos. Hang in there. I believe that we will all see better days. The price we pay for freedom is high. It is worth it to get away from the drug.

 

CC

[[Ju...]]

This feels too fragile and beautiful to put out there, but I need to share so you can remind me of this if/when things get bad again. I left the trazodone in the drawer last night and went to bed without taking anything. No melatonin, nothing and I slept most of the night. I dont know if this is a window or just my body shutting down finally, but I am trying to be grateful for this day without worrying about tomorrow. I could not have done it without the encouragement here and from the recent success story by morechocolate. I want to hold on and see if I can recover too rather than jumping into another drug that might not help and will definitely have to be tapered eventually. I will never climb mount Everest but even if I did I think this is mentally and physically the hardest thing I will ever do. Thanks KK- I'm holding on by my fingernails and I can hear you cheering for me.

[[li...]]

JKS - happy for you.  May you have many more restful nights!

Hope you saw my recent post about sleep deprivation ....

 

Lizie 

[[Ju...]]

Absolutely I saw it lizie- thank you, your post was one of the pieces of the puzzle that helped me decide to go it alone last night.

 

[[Di...]]

Happy for you JKS.  Hope it continues.

[[aw...]]

 

Every once in a while I get a very clear, very brief image of a crowd of people in these old, wooden bleachers. I'm on the field, but I'm not in a football uniform. As in a dream, when I focus on a face it changes, but I know every one of these people, they are my loving friends. And they're clapping for me  , cheering me on. I can hear them screaming out, "Yes! We know you can do it! Keep going! "

 

Those people in the bleachers are you, my benzo buddies. You understand, because you've been there. With your help, it's only a matter of time.

 

Aweigh

[[pe...]]

Aweigh - What a very beautiful and well written message. I am holding that shared love and appreciation close right now.

 

JKS- I am so glad you got some sleep! Your intuition about the meds seems to be right on for you. Hoping for lots of restful sleep for you in the days ahead.

 

Flutterbye- Congratulations! I'm following your progress on your blog and hope you're feeling better and better as the days roll past.

 

I am really close. I think I had a window today. It freaked the snot out of me. I couldn't process the level of calm and clarity. I cried. I'm hoping I'll be able to enjoy the next window when it appears.

 

Hope we all have a restful night ahead,

Peace2

 

 

[[re...]]

This is such a lovely thread.

 

JKS, I join Lizie et al. in wishing you many more restful nights.  They will come--they will.

 

Aweigh, Peace2 is right: that was wonderful.

 

And Peace2, you are on the home stretch!

 

Everyone, thinking about you, wishing you clear, wide, comfortable windows.

 

And sleep!!!

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[do...]]

 

 

How do I get a titration taper plan that I read about on this site? Who do I need to message with my info?

 

Tomorrow will mark one full week of me reducing my klonopin by 25% (1.0 to 0.75). I definitely feel my brain and body not liking it.

 

I just ordered a graduated cylinder for the titration method.

 

The thing about my situation is my diabetes and my ADHD play into my benzo use.

 

To elaborate, when I feel crappy from blood sugar swings, klonopin really makes me feel so much better. As for the ADHD, I feel like I need to take the klonopin when I am 'coming down' from the Vyvanse (Vyvanse is very similar to Adderal for anyone wondering). This is the part that sort of ruined my life.

 

To keep it (relatively) short, I was in school and absolutely needed to take the Vyvanse everyday to keep up with stuff, and I took the klonopin as well. School got harder and harder, and I took more and more of both the Vyvanse and the Klonopin, until I felt like I was about to have a total mental breakdown and potentially have something very, very bad happen, so I withdrew.

 

My goal is to come back to school and take the minimal amount of Vyvanse and no Klonopin so I wont have to have drugs canceling each other out which would lead to me taking WAY to much of both drugs (which is exactly what happened initially).

 

I feel like a waste of life now that I withdrew from school and want to abuse this stuff more than ever, and at the same time I want nothing to do with it.

 

Most people who take Vyvanse do not take benzo's to come down from them, so why should I?!? I let this combo deteriorate my brain to the extent that it altered my life plans. I have been through so much, I need to squash this problem.

 

I can live with diabetes and not take benzos. I am afraid that I will need them when I start Vyvanse again for school (I only took Vyvanse for school, I am not taking any drugs unless I need to, hence me coming off of the klonopin).

 

Help. :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :'( :'( :'( :-[ :( :'( :'( :'( :( :( :-\ :-\

[[do...]]

 

 

How do I get a titration taper plan that I read about on this site? Who do I need to message with my info?

 

Tomorrow will mark one full week of me reducing my klonopin by 25% (1.0 to 0.75). I definitely feel my brain and body not liking it.

 

I just ordered a graduated cylinder for the titration method.

 

The thing about my situation is my diabetes and my ADHD play into my benzo use.

 

To elaborate, when I feel crappy from blood sugar swings, klonopin really makes me feel so much better. As for the ADHD, I feel like I need to take the klonopin when I am 'coming down' from the Vyvanse (Vyvanse is very similar to Adderal for anyone wondering). This is the part that sort of ruined my life.

 

To keep it (relatively) short, I was in school and absolutely needed to take the Vyvanse everyday to keep up with stuff, and I took the klonopin as well. School got harder and harder, and I took more and more of both the Vyvanse and the Klonopin, until I felt like I was about to have a total mental breakdown and potentially have something very, very bad happen, so I withdrew.

 

My goal is to come back to school and take the minimal amount of Vyvanse and no Klonopin so I wont have to have drugs canceling each other out which would lead to me taking WAY to much of both drugs (which is exactly what happened initially).

 

I feel like a waste of life now that I withdrew from school and want to abuse this stuff more than ever, and at the same time I want nothing to do with it.

 

Most people who take Vyvanse do not take benzo's to come down from them, so why should I?!? I let this combo deteriorate my brain to the extent that it altered my life plans. I have been through so much, I need to squash this problem.

 

I can live with diabetes and not take benzos. I am afraid that I will need them when I start Vyvanse again for school (I only took Vyvanse for school, I am not taking any drugs unless I need to, hence me coming off of the klonopin).

 

Help.

[[re...]]

Hi, DDD, and welcome.  My goodness, you've got a lot going on!  I'm sorry you've found yourself in such a hard place.  One thing I would say is that you are tapering awfully fast--no wonder your CNS is having a reaction.  I say this as someone who "tapered" (it's not really a taper, though) just as fast, and paid the price.  I got through it, but it wasn't easy; I should note that in my case, there weren't any other drugs getting in on the act at the same time.

 

For taper plans you could check out Dr. Heather Ashton's plan:

 

http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/

 

Or go to the titration taper board here at BenzoBuddies, and see what you find:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=62.0

 

Wishing you luck.

 

Good morning, everyone--I hope you slept!

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[Mo...]]

Hi everyone. . I haven't been here in a long time, but I wanted to stop by and say hi. I am almost 7 months off and completely healed. I would like to offer support to anyone who needs it because I know all too well how nasty K is. Anyway, life is great. One day closer to complete recovery for everyone.