The Klonopin Klub

[[re...]]

JAXY!!!  CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!  That was fast!  A few months back into teaching and you've already been offered a promotion to principal??  That's amazing and wonderful.  More power to you, girl!

 

Good morning, everyone!  Have to keep this brief for now, but want to say: Jazzy, I'm sorry that a year out you're still having such trouble, but you are definitely making progress.  I wonder whether now you're in a sort of psychological rut where you've been convinced that every second night is going to be bad, and it's become a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy.  I'm not denying the realness of your symptoms, only hoping that somehow you can break that cycle.  There are a couple of ways I know to grapple with fear, neither of them a cure-all, but each somewhat helpful: meditation and deep breathing.  Ways of focusing your physical and mental energy on something that will sort of center you and give you some distance on the fear.  Try soothing music, too, maybe?

 

Must go tend to the morning--windows to all -

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[te...]]

Hi.  My name is Theresa and I'm from Bismarck, ND.  I am currently almost at two months off Klonopin cold turkey. My last pill was on October 3, 2013.  My worst symptoms are trouble swallowing (feels like there is a lump in my throat), diarrhea, horrible taste in my mouth along with my taste buds are dead, chest pain, tight muscles in neck and shoulders, sinus problems along with wheezing in throat, chest congestion, and nausea.  Am so, so tired of all this crap.

[[Co...]]

Hi tessie,

 

Sorry to hear that you are having a hard time. Withdrawal from klonopin is a difficult process. I tapered off klonopin for 7 months. As I went along I would see new w/d symptoms every day. I still do. It takes time to get through this. If you have questions there are many people that are able to answer them. I hope you feel better. Hang in there.

[[Lo...]]

Hi all-

 

This is my first K Klub post... I was on 1 mg for about a year, then "tapered" very quickly in July 2013 -- about a month to get off. I felt like I was making some progress in month 4, but the last week and a half has definitely been worse -- waves of terrible anxiety, inner vibrations (which had been getting much better) are back, confusion, muscle pains, extreme fatigue, etc, etc. Is this common at this point in recovery to see a big drop off?

 

Would also love to ask a question of those further down the healing line: I see a lot of "that was the last symptom to go" comments on the boards, but... What (and when?) were some of your first symptoms to leave? I know everyone is different, but I love to hear stories of improvement -- it gives me something to look forward to.

 

Hope everyone has a great day...

 

Lost

[[am...]]

Hi Lost,

 

You did an extremely fast taper and your brain never had to time to heal during that taper so it is doing it now. Typical healing time is 6-18 months after the medicine is stopped. I have been tapering for about 8.5 months and am now starting to feel considerably better, but I still have a ways to go.

 

Try your best to be patient and to stay positive. I know it can be extremely hard to do, but you will heal !

 

AMA 

[[re...]]

Hi, folks -

 

I'm going to respond in a general way to some of the recent posts, since there are some similar issues.  It seems as though withdrawal symptoms can, after a sort of lull, come back to bite you weeks or months later.  I think I had a version of this last June when, after ten months off and a sense of almost full recovery, I got slammed with depression that brought me to my knees.  I responded with meditation, exercise, and megadoses of Omega-3 fatty acids in the form of high-intensity molecularly distilled fish oil capsules.  Within a week I felt better--whether because of the measures I took or just because of the passage of time, I don't know.  By the way, I recommend caution with supplements like fish oil early in recovery--I felt safe trying it at ten months out, but a few months earlier I'd have avoided it (based on advice I found here at BenzoBuddies about how sometimes supplements that are otherwise helpful can rev up symptoms during withdrawal). 

 

What were my first symptoms to go?  Well, anxiety dissipated gradually after the first two weeks.  Joint pain took a LONG time to go away, and every time I did something foolish (foolish for me, anyway) like drink alcohol, I had a big setback.  But my joints (including my neck, which had bothered me a lot for quite a while) felt significantly better after six or eight months, as long as I was very careful about what I ingested.  I guess the FIRST thing to go away entirely was the sensation of burning that I would get on random patches of skin.  That, and the uncontrollable shakes I sometimes got at night, but which occurred relatively few times overall.

 

Now, to offer some encouragement to, I hope, everyone, I want to reminisce for a moment about Thanksgiving 2012.  I was about three and a half months out from jumping, and on Thanksgiving Day I felt well enough to hop on my bike and ride to a grocery store a couple of miles away to buy a pumpkin pie (I was too lazy, I'm afraid, to make one!).  It was late afternoon, but not quite coming on for dark, although the moon was up, and it was beautiful.  My family and I had a very quiet, peaceful Thanksgiving at home, and I really had reason to be thankful, because I was feeling wonderful that day.  It's one of the best holidays I can remember--restful and full of relief, as I was aware almost minute-by-minute of how much better I was feeling than I had been just a couple of months earlier.  I was profoundly grateful. 

 

If only I could send everyone here a little vial containing the essence of that experience!  But at least I'll send out my heartfelt best wishes to all of you for relief over this holiday, and beyond. 

 

Peace,

 

Rek

[[Lo...]]

AMA, Rek-

 

Thanks for the responses. It seems like no matter how many times I read it or hear it, it always helps to get some re-affirmation that you're on the right path and things will get better...

 

I hope everyone has a fantastic Thanksgiving! 

 

Lost

[[pe...]]

Hi KK,

I have a question for you. While tapering from klonopin, did you or do you have time when you were symptom free? I feel like there's an idea on other threads that if you're going slowly enough, all of your symptoms will disappear. Most of the time, my symptoms are manageable but they're never gone. I've always got a touch of emotional numbing or cognitive fog or something going on. If I went more slowly would it let up? I'm kind of confused. Is the goal while tapering to be symptom free or to keep symptoms low and remain functional?

 

Thanks all,

Peace2

 

Jaxy- Thanks for coming back and sharing your great news! It's so great to see those happy updates.

[[Co...]]

peace2,

 

I tapered off k for 7 months and sx never let up. It was a tough time. I was put on valium the day I jumped to help temper sx. I am sure it helped but the lower I go the harder it gets. It is my belief that klonopin is a nasty drug to be free of. I do not doubt that I will get there but also understand at this point that it will be a fight. I hope you feel better.

 

Hug from Colorado

[[we...]]

That was lovely Rek, thank you.

 

It's these stories that drive me to keep strong. Well I just realised it's been 1 week today since 1 started my first taper of 6-4mg and although the insomnia I had when I started has backed off a little, it's still not gone.

 

I've never had trouble going straight down from 6mg to 4mg before. Alll is going well but I know to slow right down now and should probably hold for 3 more weeks before dropping to 3mg and see how long I handle that and re-assess with your guidance which I understand won't be medical advice. I've done this twice before so I know I can do it again and reading this thread is spurring me on, so thank you everyone. I dropped in last week on the pre-tense of looking at a taper and no one said a word or pushed me but the positive attitude in the K Klub made me begin that day.

 

Peace out guys,

 

WF

[[...]]

"There is hope and you will get there."   Peace, I have to say, I certainly don't run my taper around those times, but I do have times when I find myself, saying, "I feel normal... there is not a single twinge that feels like k w/d."  I may go days at a time before having a few hours like that but they do occur.  Mostly, like you, I just try to keep sx manageable... but at these lower doses... I find myself, time and again, realizing I was sleeping on my own, or no psychological nor physical sx... at least nothing apparant, and that works for me.   This can be so individual... I think a lot might depend on whether your CNS has suffered other problems that make it more susceptible to some sx.  I don't know... just a thought.  I made molasses cookies today w/ peach jam centers.    I'm not sure what that means, either, but  In 2 days I see my kids...    To everyone in the path of the snow... be careful and stay safe.  Njoy

[[th...]]

On my way....

Some crushing fatigue and tiredness, but I keep on rocking

[[Di...]]

Several newcomers..Welcome to everyone!

 

[[So...]]

Since I am still new to Klonopin, can someone tell me how long it takes to kick in? I know that you kind really don't feel it, like you do with xanax. But, I can't ever tell when it takes effect. I just get very tired. Well, then again, I just stay tired from it all day right now.

 

Thanks.

 

Denise 

[[Mo...]]

Hello folkz,

 

been a long time since I was on here. Hope everyone is doing well. To all the newcomers, keep on keeping on it all works out . My email still gets notified if I get personal messages on here so if anyone needs someone to talk to feel free to hit me up. I actually plan on attending graduate school for Mental Health counseling and making that my career so I would not mind just talking about different issues people around here might have. I am out of withdrawal and have been for awhile and I now look back and recognize what was withdrawal and what was anxiety. As I have said in previous posts though, make no mistake there is withdrawal due to benzos that is NOT simply anxiety. I wrestled with that idea a lot the first months off the stuff and I can say now that there were at least 5-6 things I experienced that were clearly my nervous system having fits due to lack of benzos. One that will always stick with me is the nights where the skin on my legs was on fire. It wasn't a muscular burning that would fit with anxiety, it was a strange and painful heat that my skin was experiencing. If my legs touched any surface it felt like hot bacon grease was spilling on them. That wasn't "just anxiety" haha.

 

These days I vary from long periods of doing damn well to periods of falling back into the old anxiety that got me medicated years ago and led to benzo use. I have dealt with severe depression and severe anxiety issues over the years and I can say there is a definite improvement with my depression. It is no longer stand alone, it needs days and weeks of anxiety to wear me down first to manifest. Even more positive though is even when my depression does return my mindset is much more beneficial. I experience depression now, instead of hide in a corner of my mind and wait for it to blow over. One learns a lot about themselves and even a bit about the world that you might miss if you weren't being roughed up by your own head. Anxiety however is the white whale. I find no benefit to it, learn very little from it, and still can't find any consistent ways to combat it. Do not be discouraged though fellow anxiety sufferers! I have found a host of things that provide some relief, just not the magic bullet or combo. Meditation and breathing exercises continue to be the #1 thing I can suggest.

 

For those still cutting and tapering, the biggest thing I took from my taper was that each one is its own adventure. You can cut 10% one week and be thrown into a nightmare, stabilize, then cut another 10% a few weeks later and not notice a thing wrong. Don't get caught up in horror stories or feeling that each cut could get worse because there is no way of knowing nor any evidence I have found that supports that. Each cut is a roll of the dice independent of the last one good or bad. Keep pushing through friends!

[[Go...]]

Hello everyone, I really need some support.  I am down to .25mg of K from 2.2mg k.  My taper has been long and painful.  Now that Im down lower, my sxs are very intense.  The skin burning and a lot of benzo flu like sxs.  I was hoping and praying that the lower I got, things would get better.  Guess that's not going to be the case for me. 

 

I am convinced that if you are in a kindled situation, your CNS is super sensitive.  Just looking for some support.

 

GG

[[re...]]

Mogeii!!  How wonderful to hear from you!  And great to hear about your progress--also your insights as to symptoms, anxiety vs. other kinds of symptoms, etc.  That burning sensation on the skin you describe (and Godsgrace mentions)--I had a version of that, and it was possibly the weirdest of all my symptoms, right up there among the symptoms that made me question my own sanity.  I would get entirely random burning patches on my arms, legs, or torso that felt like an instant sunburn, except those parts of my skin hadn't been exposed to the sun, and anyway the patches were extremely localized.  Bizarre.  As I said in a recent post, that was the first symptom to go; tinnitus is the last--it is still with me, 24/7, and I'm resigned to it.  Mostly I don't notice it--unlike the other stuff I endured, I find tinnitus can be ignored.  Anyway, good point about anxiety and how it can be a symptom all by itself or entangled with other symptoms.  I suspect that heart palpitations, for instance (which I never experienced, but lots of folks do) may be a function of anxiety.  It's all so complicated.  And you are right that it does not seem possible to predict the trajectory of a taper with perfect accuracy, no matter how systematically one goes about it.  There is an element of chance, a wild card, that simply has to be reckoned with, and dealt with as best one can when a cut results in more disruption than expected.  What is tricky, but essential, is to remember to keep telling oneself, "THIS IS TEMPORARY."  It can be so hard to believe that when a wave hits.  But it's true.

 

Good morning, folks!

 

Godsgrace, it certainly does sound as though your central nervous system is on high alert.  What kinds of things are you doing to try to self-soothe?  And have you found anything that helps at all?  Deep breathing?  Meditation?  Any sort of herbal tea infusion?  I'm mentioning the things that were helpful to me.  I found ginger tea to be helpful--I don't know why.  And deep breathing actually enabled me to catch a little sleep sometimes.  Meditation can be hard if you're in too much pain, but if you could manage even fifteen or twenty minutes, it might be beneficial.  You're going to be all right, but yes, it is rough--I'm so sorry you're going through such a tough time!

 

Peace,

 

Rek 

 

 

[[Di...]]

So sorry Godsgrace.  I was reading one of your posts over on another thread.  The kindling must be awful.

 

 

 

Hi Mogeii!  Glad to hear from you, and that you are doing well. 

 

 

 

[[Te...]]

I know I haven't made many friends on this forum, but I got a PM about a week ago asking me to come post here.

 

Kicking these damn pills can be hard especially this time of year. Last year at this time I was taking 1-1.5mg of klonopin every day and I remember how out of it I felt. Nothing terrible but I just didn't feel like myself at all. I was basically a zombie.

 

It gets better folks. MUCH better. I'm almost 3 months out right now and I feel FANTASTIC. Better than I did before benzos. Don't give up hope and try to stay optimistic. Just remember that time flies and any pain or discomfort you are feeling now will eventually dissipate.

 

Hope you can all enjoy Thanksgiving with your families 

 

Here is a picture of Doge

 

http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/doge-sun-meme.jpg

[[Di...]]

I know I haven't made many friends on this forum, but I got a PM about a week ago asking me to come post here.

 

Kicking these damn pills can be hard especially this time of year. Last year at this time I was taking 1-1.5mg of klonopin every day and I remember how out of it I felt. Nothing terrible but I just didn't feel like myself at all. I was basically a zombie.

 

It gets better folks. MUCH better. I'm almost 3 months out right now and I feel FANTASTIC. Better than I did before benzos. Don't give up hope and try to stay optimistic. Just remember that time flies and any pain or discomfort you are feeling now will eventually dissipate.

 

Hope you can all enjoy Thanksgiving with your families 

 

Here is a picture of Doge

 

http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/doge-sun-meme.jpg

 

Thanks for posting.  This is very encouraging. 

[[So...]]

Hey everybody,

 

I c/t'd xanax on 8/4/13. I became very ill and my Dr reinstated me on Klonopin two weeks ago.

 

Well it made my head feel like it was going to explode, so he has now put me on Ativan. Yesterday I took half my dose of klon and half my dose of ativan, at the same time. When will I feel the klon w/d hit? Or, will I since I substituted it with the ativan?

 

Denise 

[[Di...]]

Hey everybody,

 

I c/t'd xanax on 8/4/13. I became very ill and my Dr reinstated me on Klonopin two weeks ago.

 

Well it made my head feel like it was going to explode, so he has now put me on Ativan. Yesterday I took half my dose of klon and half my dose of ativan, at the same time. When will I feel the klon w/d hit? Or, will I since I substituted it with the ativan?

 

Denise 

 

It seems like if you do the crossover slowly enough that you may not feel much w/d from klonopin.

 

Although, keep in mind that ativan is a shorter acting benzo than K.

 

Good luck with this.

 

[[So...]]

Well, I definitely had a little increase in my anxiety today from cutting my Klon doses in half and substituting the Ativan. I think that I will hold with doing this for a few days. Then quarter the doses. I think it messed with my appetite as well. On Thanksgiving of all days!! But, I still ate!!

 

Denise 

[[Di...]]

Well, I definitely had a little increase in my anxiety today from cutting my Klon doses in half and substituting the Ativan. I think that I will hold with doing this for a few days. Then quarter the doses. I think it messed with my appetite as well. On Thanksgiving of all days!! But, I still ate!!

 

Denise 

 

That's probably a good idea to hold for a few days.

 

Oh bummer, messed up your appetite on Thanksgiving.  I'm glad you were still able to eat.

 

Hang-in there.

[[So...]]

Well, I definitely had a little increase in my anxiety today from cutting my Klon doses in half and substituting the Ativan. I think that I will hold with doing this for a few days. Then quarter the doses. I think it messed with my appetite as well. On Thanksgiving of all days!! But, I still ate!!

 

Denise 

 

That's probably a good idea to hold for a few days.

 

Oh bummer, messed up your appetite on Thanksgiving.  I'm glad you were still able to eat.

 

Hang-in there.

 

Yeah, I am gonna hold for another day.

 

As for appetite, I am not sure if it was the low dose of Celexa I started last night, or the low dose of Atenelol that I also started last night.

 

But, I did enjoy a sliver of pumpkin pie!! Yummy!!

 

Denise