The Long Hold Support Group

[[De...]]

Oh g,

I'm sorry your sleep is bad. I did go through a bad period of no sleep. It was awful. It will get better. My sx get better when I'm busy too, its so weird. I hope the other sx let up soon. Make sure your drinking water, it's been very hot!

[[Tr...]]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DD! HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT DAY! 🥳🎂🎁🎉🎉

LOVE YA,

TRISHY ❤️

[[...]]

Hey Clearblue sorry you're going through it. I think the best thing right now is to hold at your dose until your symptoms subside and they will if you hold long enough. Then you can plan a course of action on how you'll taper. It's recommended that you cross over to Diazepam as it has a longer half life and symptoms are not as severe. The added benefit is that you can use liquid Diazepam which to me makes micro tapering much easier. Good luck and keep us posted

[[...]]

I went to the dentist yesterday and with the exception of a sore jaw everything's fine. I thought it might throw me into a wave but I actually feel better (clear headed) since the infection has been taken care of.

 

I've decided to start my taper by reducing .01 mg/2 days. This works out to apprx. 16%/month. If I get hit, I plan to hold and slow it down to 10%.

 

V. good to see you back and thanks for explaining to me how percentages work.

 

I'm using the liquid micro taper. I feel it's accurate and easy to do: I take 1 ml of liquid Diazepam add it to 99 ml of water (using a graduated cylinder) and mix it into a baby jar. On the first 2 days, I pour 99 ml of solution into the cylinder and drink it. The next 2 days I pour 98 ml and so on until I'm done.

 

I'm pretty apprehensive if not scared. I've held for 2 years and dealt with my health issues and I feel so good that part of me says "don't fix it if it's not broken". But I know I have to get this poison out of me or I'll never truly heal. And then I have to tackle all the other meds my idiot doc put me on so I still have a long ways to go.

 

Jwl, I am glad to hear that you are feeling  good under valium. I wish I could feel this good.

I.still have heart palpitations and parasetsia sometimes. A lot of fatigue. Easily exhausted . I don't know if it is the valium or the nasty withdrawal that I had prior to that.

My dream would be to taper at stay at a low dose for a while like you.

 

Jasmine, you're doing so much better than a month ago. Maybe you should go back and read some of your posts. I'm sorry if the Valium is making you tired. Are you sure that's what it is? I would rather be tired and sleepy than revved up and anxious.

 

For the record I don't believe in tolerance in the sense that it causes WD symptoms. I held for a year at 20 mgs after my CT and only got/felt better. And then for 6 months at 10 mgs and 2 years at 1 mg. Each time the symptoms lessened or went away completely

 

This.

 

I tapered down to .5 mg K from 3 mg back from 2013 to 2017. I was exhausted at that point and stopped at .5mg. I was done with the whole thing. I've only improved on it over time. It's been three years and I feel so much better now.

 

Now I'm thinking about tapering again at some point soon. I broke my leg so that has to recover. And I am losing weight on Keto so I can get back to the weight I was before this all began almost a decade ago. The thought of tapering again does not feel comforting as I think more about it. If I do it, I am sure I will stop at some point to take a breather given right now I am sure it would take me several years to get off it. I'm pondering just tapering down to .25 and holding there for a bit. Then maybe .125. Baby steps is where I am at now.

 

Good for you Unknown. Not everyone has the patience to hold that long and find themselves in trouble. You're nailing it!

[[De...]]

Thanks tt!!! ❤❤😻🌸

[[...]]

Happy Birthday D! Tapering benzos and gabapentin? You go girl

[[De...]]

Thanks JWL! Ugh, Its ok just the sweating is making me craxy!

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Suzy woohoo 🎊🎉 21 again honey 😘. Happy belated birthday l hope you enjoyed some of it? Please go very slow honey there are no easy drugs to taper.l am not a fan of multi tapers as it confuses everything so perhaps stick with tapering the gaba.Slow and steady wins the race.l hope you are doing ok and your mum isn't pissing you off too much.love you.X

Morning Clear and welcome to the LHSG always good to have new people here however l wish it was under better circumstances.l cannot tell you how you will benefit from a hold we are all very different however l will say be very patient and please keep a journal so you can track your progress.lt can and does take a long time to get even near stable you may find you feel worse before you feel any way better.Have to say l am not expecting miracles from my holds however they allow me to get my feet below me and stay functional so that is why l do them.l also believe in healing during the taper however that takes time as well.Tapering is only the beginning and we must think beyond that to minimise post withdrawal symptoms.l know you are suffering panic attacks honey so please try to work on those as they are very common in withdrawal as is anxiety etc.l would also suggest you keep your dosage as steady as possible and try your best to acquire as many coping strategies as you can muster.Stay strong honey.love you.X

Morning Jasmine as l have said before this takes a long time to settle down.Tapering is way in the distance.The future is what it is we can't predict it so try to keep your mind from latching onto the what if's.love you.X

Morning LWT have to resumed your taper?l am glad you finally got your mouth sorted out that is a bonus.l don't agree with you when it comes to tolerance again we are all very different and that is very obvious on this forum.love you.X

Morning Ginger are you feeling any better today?l hope so.l have to say again we are all different l had a cortisone injection in my shoulder a couple of years ago didn't notice anything however l was feeling crap anyway so probably didn't notice.l am glad you kept busy honey l think it helps a lot.love you.X

Morning Unknown glad to see you here.l hope your taper goes smoothly.Remember slow and steady.You have got this.love you.X

Morning Meems there are few on a DMT who cut every day.l think the goal is to hold of you feel the withdrawal symptoms ramping up.I think you are going to be ok honey.love you.X

Morning Trish out shopping woohoo 🎊🎉.l must say l am shocked 🤣. What did you buy me? Well how are you honey l hope you are ok?l am my entourage are heading to Galway for a while.l love Galway beautiful and plenty of life about it.The girls are good and the family are all keeping well.Still having shitty withdrawal symptoms but what can you do.l will be back when l can.Give my bil a hug from me.love you my lST X

Morning lady Mary, Intend Gilly Valley Free Troch Val Final GP NJ, Olive Esperanza Boo Nova and everyone here sending you my love.X

[[Tr...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Suzy woohoo 🎊🎉 21 again honey 😘. Happy belated birthday l hope you enjoyed some of it? Please go very slow honey there are no easy drugs to taper.l am not a fan of multi tapers as it confuses everything so perhaps stick with tapering the gaba.Slow and steady wins the race.l hope you are doing ok and your mum isn't pissing you off too much.love you.X

Morning Clear and welcome to the LHSG always good to have new people here however l wish it was under better circumstances.l cannot tell you how you will benefit from a hold we are all very different however l will say be very patient and please keep a journal so you can track your progress.lt can and does take a long time to get even near stable you may find you feel worse before you feel any way better.Have to say l am not expecting miracles from my holds however they allow me to get my feet below me and stay functional so that is why l do them.l also believe in healing during the taper however that takes time as well.Tapering is only the beginning and we must think beyond that to minimise post withdrawal symptoms.l know you are suffering panic attacks honey so please try to work on those as they are very common in withdrawal as is anxiety etc.l would also suggest you keep your dosage as steady as possible and try your best to acquire as many coping strategies as you can muster.Stay strong honey.love you.X

Morning Jasmine as l have said before this takes a long time to settle down.Tapering is way in the distance.The future is what it is we can't predict it so try to keep your mind from latching onto the what if's.love you.X

Morning LWT have to resumed your taper?l am glad you finally got your mouth sorted out that is a bonus.l don't agree with you when it comes to tolerance again we are all very different and that is very obvious on this forum.love you.X

Morning Ginger are you feeling any better today?l hope so.l have to say again we are all different l had a cortisone injection in my shoulder a couple of years ago didn't notice anything however l was feeling crap anyway so probably didn't notice.l am glad you kept busy honey l think it helps a lot.love you.X

Morning Unknown glad to see you here.l hope your taper goes smoothly.Remember slow and steady.You have got this.love you.X

Morning Meems there are few on a DMT who cut every day.l think the goal is to hold of you feel the withdrawal symptoms ramping up.I think you are going to be ok honey.love you.X

Morning Trish out shopping woohoo 🎊🎉.l must say l am shocked 🤣. What did you buy me? Well how are you honey l hope you are ok?l am my entourage are heading to Galway for a while.l love Galway beautiful and plenty of life about it.The girls are good and the family are all keeping well.Still having shitty withdrawal symptoms but what can you do.l will be back when l can.Give my bil a hug from me.love you my lST X

Morning lady Mary, Intend Gilly Valley Free Troch Val Final GP NJ, Olive Esperanza Boo Nova and everyone here sending you my love.X

Hey twin! I've been thinking about you and wondering how you're doing. Glad to hear that you're out there galavanting and living it up, you deserve some fun and good times with the girls. Have a great time in Galway I'll have to Google it to see what kind of place it is  Be careful and wear your mask lady 🤨

Me shopping?? I know shocking isn't it?  :laugh: I'll pick ya up some Jimmy choo keep you smelling lovely my dear

I'm sorry you're having the dreaded wd sxs however you're not letting it stop you from living your life. You always handle your wd sxs like a champ. You're an inspiration to us all. I on the other hand am dealing with intrusive thoughts again 😏 no idea why just came out of the blue. I really hate it! It's been about 20 days since my last cut so idk.. I have been a little down lately too thinking about how long it's going to take me. I truly think I'm in this mess for years to come. I only hope my prescribing Dr is too bc the thought of trying to find another Dr sends indescribable fear through my body. I have been given reassurances from my therapist and dil that they will help me but idk I think it's a little PTSD from the former Dr and what he did to me that shakes my confidence. I think I'll probably just have to live with that fear bc nothing makes it go away.

Anywho twin you woop it up cautiously out there and I'll look forward to another post from you soon! You know I miss ya when you're not around but I'm so happy you're enjoying yourself.

I will give your bil a big hug for you and I'm sure he'll enjoy it bc he doesn't get many from me lately 😔

Love you lots!

LST ❤️❤️❤️

 

[[Un...]]

 

This.

 

I tapered down to .5 mg K from 3 mg back from 2013 to 2017. I was exhausted at that point and stopped at .5mg. I was done with the whole thing. I've only improved on it over time. It's been three years and I feel so much better now.

 

Now I'm thinking about tapering again at some point soon. I broke my leg so that has to recover. And I am losing weight on Keto so I can get back to the weight I was before this all began almost a decade ago. The thought of tapering again does not feel comforting as I think more about it. If I do it, I am sure I will stop at some point to take a breather given right now I am sure it would take me several years to get off it. I'm pondering just tapering down to .25 and holding there for a bit. Then maybe .125. Baby steps is where I am at now.

 

Good for you Unknown. Not everyone has the patience to hold that long and find themselves in trouble. You're nailing it!

 

Thanks JWL. It's hard to come here and see how people that were here before when I was tapering are gone and done. I'm happy for them. And I'm happy that I held and got back my life. But I am sad that I have so far to go if I want to get off this stuff. I know it could take several years longer which is disheartening. I will admit that not even thinking about the taper much at all the last few years was a godsend. When I thought about trying to get off, it always got me upset. I think now, focusing on getting my dose lower is the only way to really do it without feeling overwhelmed.

 

I also really believe that we do heal on the way down, and if we stop at a lower dose for a while, our bodies have more time to adapt and heal from the higher dose we were on. My experience seems to support that. I think less in our bodies is better. And then when we get toward that finish line, all those longer holds will pay off because our bodies have adjusted each time on the way down. I suspect that a straight taper all the way down doesn't give the body time to really adjust as well or perhaps that there is still more in our systems since many of these stay in the body quite a while. Reminds me of when you lose weight. People get troubled about plateaus but those plateaus are your body adapting to the changes it has gone through.  That's a good  thing I think.

[[ja...]]

Jwl, how long did it take to stabilize?

I don't feel great. Still dizzy.

I hope I won't stay feeling this bad until I get off it.

[[De...]]

Hi Stut! Thank you! I can go out partying now! Lol. I wouldn't have lowered the gabapentin.,My psych did it. I said I was tired all the time a d I cant go the bathroom, seriously at all. I was just trying to make conversation because she asks me how I am and of course I cant say. Surprisingly I'm ok. Weird. I was sweating agitated and emotional for 8 days. I'm really dumb and doing stupid things, but other than that I feel ok. Still waiting for my neck to heal after carrying those bags. I feel like they tightened up because I was in wd. I do go e bulging discs in my heck, but they ga ent bothered me for years. This wucks! Any way I'm not tapering anymore gabapentin. I'll wait till I'm off the k. I,sorry your sx are bad. Hang on! Your at the finish line! Stay safe! I wish I was in galway with you! Ly susy

[[va...]]

Hi everyone. I'm so sorry, u didn't have time to catch up but I will asap.

 

Dizziness question. Has anyone been extremely dizzy as a symptom of withdrawal? I don't know if it's withdrawal, c the change of brands, glutamate damage from last summer, or a side effect of gabapentin. Though this started two months ago, got worse two weeks ago, and gabapentin is not recent so I'm not sure if this could be a stage of bwd. I have less fear, though it's still there, but terrible dizziness, to the point of having to lie down for some periods.

[[...]]

 

This.

 

I tapered down to .5 mg K from 3 mg back from 2013 to 2017. I was exhausted at that point and stopped at .5mg. I was done with the whole thing. I've only improved on it over time. It's been three years and I feel so much better now.

 

Now I'm thinking about tapering again at some point soon. I broke my leg so that has to recover. And I am losing weight on Keto so I can get back to the weight I was before this all began almost a decade ago. The thought of tapering again does not feel comforting as I think more about it. If I do it, I am sure I will stop at some point to take a breather given right now I am sure it would take me several years to get off it. I'm pondering just tapering down to .25 and holding there for a bit. Then maybe .125. Baby steps is where I am at now.

 

Good for you Unknown. Not everyone has the patience to hold that long and find themselves in trouble. You're nailing it!

 

Thanks JWL. It's hard to come here and see how people that were here before when I was tapering are gone and done. I'm happy for them. And I'm happy that I held and got back my life. But I am sad that I have so far to go if I want to get off this stuff. I know it could take several years longer which is disheartening. I will admit that not even thinking about the taper much at all the last few years was a godsend. When I thought about trying to get off, it always got me upset. I think now, focusing on getting my dose lower is the only way to really do it without feeling overwhelmed.

 

I also really believe that we do heal on the way down, and if we stop at a lower dose for a while, our bodies have more time to adapt and heal from the higher dose we were on. My experience seems to support that. I think less in our bodies is better. And then when we get toward that finish line, all those longer holds will pay off because our bodies have adjusted each time on the way down. I suspect that a straight taper all the way down doesn't give the body time to really adjust as well or perhaps that there is still more in our systems since many of these stay in the body quite a while. Reminds me of when you lose weight. People get troubled about plateaus but those plateaus are your body adapting to the changes it has gone through.  That's a good  thing I think.

 

I agree with you 100% Unknown. I also feel we heal on the way down and long holds allow our bodies to stabilize. We either go slow with manageable symptoms or go fast and jump too soon with severe symptoms. Either way we have to pay the piper. I too have seen others who have tapered fast with minimum sxs but found out the hard way that I'm not one of them. I don't know why that is. I'm sure the length of time we've been on benzos has a lot to do with down regulation and gaba production but I wonder if there are other factors as well: our general health, concussions...? Sigh, whatever the reason I have come to terms with my situation and am taking it slow and steady. Acceptance was one of the things I struggled with. For many years I was bitter and angry. If anything this has been a humbling experience and has helped me to have empathy for other so I suppose that's a good thing

[[Ma...]]

Hi Stut! Thank you! I can go out partying now! Lol. I wouldn't have lowered the gabapentin.,My psych did it. I said I was tired all the time a d I cant go the bathroom, seriously at all. I was just trying to make conversation because she asks me how I am and of course I cant say. Surprisingly I'm ok. Weird. I was sweating agitated and emotional for 8 days. I'm really dumb and doing stupid things, but other than that I feel ok. Still waiting for my neck to heal after carrying those bags. I feel like they tightened up because I was in wd. I do go e bulging discs in my heck, but they ga ent bothered me for years. This wucks! Any way I'm not tapering anymore gabapentin. I'll wait till I'm off the k. I,sorry your sx are bad. Hang on! Your at the finish line! Stay safe! I wish I was in galway with you! Ly susy

 

You can be so hilarious DD, love you woman !!    :2funny:

[[...]]

Jwl, how long did it take to stabilize?

I don't feel great. Still dizzy.

I hope I won't stay feeling this bad until I get off it.

 

I'm sorry Jasmine. I don't think any of us can tell you how long it'll take you to stabilize buy I can say you're getting there. You've had several good days where you were able to accomplish things that you probably couldn't do a month ago. Like I said this whole thing isn't linear, you'll have several good days and then get hit with all kinds of symptoms. That's why it's good to keep a journal because your benzo brain will tell you "you're always going to be like this" and you can say "no I'm not because I had some pretty good days awhile ago".

[[...]]

Hi everyone. I'm so sorry, u didn't have time to catch up but I will asap.

 

Dizziness question. Has anyone been extremely dizzy as a symptom of withdrawal? I don't know if it's withdrawal, c the change of brands, glutamate damage from last summer, or a side effect of gabapentin. Though this started two months ago, got worse two weeks ago, and gabapentin is not recent so I'm not sure if this could be a stage of bwd. I have less fear, though it's still there, but terrible dizziness, to the point of having to lie down for some periods.

 

I'm sorry V. I don't think I had that symptom at least not to the point it was debilitating. Have you checked your BP? I personally think it's WD but maybe others can chime it.

[[De...]]

Hi v, I just read that dizziness is a wd sx. I'm soorythat sounds terrible. You could get checked, but it is a wd sx. 

[[Un...]]

Hi everyone. I'm so sorry, u didn't have time to catch up but I will asap.

 

Dizziness question. Has anyone been extremely dizzy as a symptom of withdrawal? I don't know if it's withdrawal, c the change of brands, glutamate damage from last summer, or a side effect of gabapentin. Though this started two months ago, got worse two weeks ago, and gabapentin is not recent so I'm not sure if this could be a stage of bwd. I have less fear, though it's still there, but terrible dizziness, to the point of having to lie down for some periods.

 

When I was in acute w/d I was very dizzy. I think I had some minor dizziness at times during my taper. I remember at times in the shower I felt a little off balance too. It's due to healing or changes that impact the inner ear IIRC.

[[va...]]

Thanks everyone.

 

Unknown that makes sense because recently I had a little tinnitus preceding this dizziness. I'm not going to the doctor. Not interested in getting covid plus I have too much to do already without having to run tests and stuff. If it's not bwd then let us just drop dead. Just kidding. Gnight everyone.

[[ja...]]

I have dizziness but it is more like a migraine and a feeling of being overstimulated.

Then, I have to lay down in the dark, close my eyes, and do some.mindfulness of breathing then I feel.better.

I have to repeat this several times a day.

I am still stabilizing.

[[va...]]

I have dizziness but it is more like a migraine and a feeling of being overstimulated.

Then, I have to lay down in the dark, close my eyes, and do some.mindfulness of breathing then I feel.better.

I have to repeat this several times a day.

I am still stabilizing.

 

Thank you Jasmine! That sounds a lot like what I have. Most of the time I have to keep going though. I hope we get better. You keep holding, even if improvement is slow, you sound much better.

[[Gi...]]

Hi everyone. I'm so sorry, u didn't have time to catch up but I will asap.

 

Dizziness question. Has anyone been extremely dizzy as a symptom of withdrawal? I don't know if it's withdrawal, c the change of brands, glutamate damage from last summer, or a side effect of gabapentin. Though this started two months ago, got worse two weeks ago, and gabapentin is not recent so I'm not sure if this could be a stage of bwd. I have less fear, though it's still there, but terrible dizziness, to the point of having to lie down for some periods.

 

Hi V,

 

Dizziness is one of my symptoms.  Though it has been nearly 4 months since my last cut I still have episodes.  In fact I was dizzy every day last week.  Some days I'm laying down most of the day since even walking to another room is problematic.  I'm very sorry you suffer from this too.  G.

[[va...]]

Gingermint I'm sorry you have this too. Do these periods last very long for you? This started for me about two months ago. I used to have more fear. Now the fear has some what diminished although it's still there, and I'm blessed with this new symptom.

[[De...]]

Hahaaa! Mm, we have to have a sense of humour to get through this crap!  love you dd