I can’t do this anymore

[[Sh...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

[[Be...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

Yay!!! This is awesome - I’m so happy for you lovely.  Yippeeeee! Do you have a RAT test to test yourself? It could be Benzo flu. Xxx

[[Th...]]

That's great news...hold onto all of this small victories!

 

As I told HM, I am pretty confident you'll turn a corner sometime in 2022?  I'm not sure when, but you will in my educated opinion.  That doesn't mean you'll completely recover in 2022, but enough to live a decent life.  At least that's my hope and prayer for you!  I don't want newbies to the site thinking I am claiming to be some sort of insomnia Nostradamus! 

[[Sh...]]

Thanks the way. Nope I’ll take it. Thanku.

 

I AM GOING TO GET BETTER THIS YEAR 

 

Hi Bess xx 😘

 

 

[[Sh...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

Yay!!! This is awesome - I’m so happy for you lovely.  Yippeeeee! Do you have a RAT test to test yourself? It could be Benzo flu. Xxx

 

Thanks Bess. Rat tests are like trying to find a needle in a haystack and no way am I getting PCR. So far today I feel ok so maybe just a rough day

[Guest [An...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

That's awesome to hear. Is your watch saying you got 2hr deep and 2hr REM?

 

 

Funny enough, I got sick last week, and the symptoms seem to be omicron. And wouldn't you know it? It hurt my sleep. I've had a few days of only getting 3hr. So I ended up going to my stash of Cannabis and Supplements, and I'm managing 6-7hr with them. Supposedly the C-19 was supposed to make you sleepier, all it did was make me feel nauseous and unable to sleep. But I'm managing it and am starting to feel better after a week.

[[Sh...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

That's awesome to hear. Is your watch saying you got 2hr deep and 2hr REM?

 

 

Funny enough, I got sick last week, and the symptoms seem to be omicron. And wouldn't you know it? It hurt my sleep. I've had a few days of only getting 3hr. So I ended up going to my stash of Cannabis and Supplements, and I'm managing 6-7hr with them. Supposedly the C-19 was supposed to make you sleepier, all it did was make me feel nauseous and unable to sleep. But I'm managing it and am starting to feel better after a week.

 

Hey andros. Yeah 2 hrs of each last 2 nights. It never says that much. First for me.

 

Yeah I spoke to a guy the other day that said he slept 10 hrs the first day he had it. I said nothing but on the inside I kind of wanted to punch him. God then he was complaining about how all he could do was sleep.

 

I was like “oh u poor thing that must be awful” 

 

Glad ur supps helped. It’s hard to get over without sleep x

[Guest [An...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

That's awesome to hear. Is your watch saying you got 2hr deep and 2hr REM?

 

 

Funny enough, I got sick last week, and the symptoms seem to be omicron. And wouldn't you know it? It hurt my sleep. I've had a few days of only getting 3hr. So I ended up going to my stash of Cannabis and Supplements, and I'm managing 6-7hr with them. Supposedly the C-19 was supposed to make you sleepier, all it did was make me feel nauseous and unable to sleep. But I'm managing it and am starting to feel better after a week.

 

Hey andros. Yeah 2 hrs of each last 2 nights. It never says that much. First for me.

 

Yeah I spoke to a guy the other day that said he slept 10 hrs the first day he had it. I said nothing but on the inside I kind of wanted to punch him. God then he was complaining about how all he could do was sleep.

 

I was like “oh u poor thing that must be awful” 

 

Glad ur supps helped. It’s hard to get over without sleep x

 

Believe the deep sleep one. I find that one is VERY accurate. 2hr REM is also pretty good. That's probably the reason you felt normal. This is a very good sign. You're not out of the woods yet, but so close. I know every time I wake up from a dream, and I check the stats, wouldn't you know it, it says I was in REM sleep? lol.

 

I wish I was like my brother. He falls asleep with the lights on, music blaring at like 85 decibels, in 5 to 10 mins.

 

Even before, I had to have complete peace and quiet, a blackened room, just the right temp, etc etc.

 

And I'm not 100% back to that. I'd say I'm 95% there even after literally a year now.

 

But once you can sleep a solid 5hr on your own, you will be so happy. I can't wait for you to get to that.

[[Sh...]]

Yeah I tend to believe the deep one coz there’s no awake bits mixed in there. Rem obviously there is.

 

I know. When I see men asleep in shopping centers sitting waiting for their wives I feel like screaming at them. They don’t know how lucky they are. I was usually ok before all this mess. But I started wearing ear buds to sleep when I still slept with hubby coz he snores. But if I fell asleep before he got into bed without them I would sleep thru no problem.

 

Ahhhh memories 

 

Thanks andros x hope ur little blip ends quickly. When I get to 5 hrs every night, I’ll be calling it and writing a success story

[[Be...]]

Thanks the way. Nope I’ll take it. Thanku.

 

I AM GOING TO GET BETTER THIS YEAR 

 

Hi Bess xx 😘

 

Hey lovely - you are totally going to get better this year - YOU ARE GETTING BETTER ALREADY - look at you go - so so proud of you.  You got this girl xx

[[Sh...]]

Well, 2 weeks ago I was ready to throw the towel in. 

 

How are u feeling xx

[[le...]]

Glad you are doing better. I've given up on thinking we all recover anymore, would have some Windows by now if was going get better.Had horrible panic attack today. Glad you at least have come out the other side 😋

[[Sh...]]

Sorry to hear that leann.

[[Be...]]

shayna, when someone says that they sleep to much and it bothers them, I always want to reply, "God, I would give anything to be able sleep all day."  But I wouldn't make that statement because that would piss them off.  I have very broken sleep and never sleep soundly,  Plus, I have too many responsibilities and stuff to take care of each day since I live alone. 

[[Be...]]

Something wierd has happened the last 2 nights. So Fitbit says rem and deep is 4 hrs again. And I remember being awake at some points during the night but not many. Also my heart rate which has been in the low 50s this whole time mostly, is back to 60 average. I’m still getting heart palpitations and my eye is really sore and red, but yesterday I had a huge swim at the beach and I was thinking, wow, I feel ok. Like normal. I did have a particularly rough day covid symptoms wise. (I don’t know if it’s possible to be reinfected so fast, but I was recovering well, then my boss came into the office with obvious symptoms, coughing everywhere saying he thought he just had a cold, got tested and yep positive. So I am feeling tight in the chest and cough up more crap). But I just thought to myself, I’m going to get better this year. And I just new it. Maybe wishful thinking but I just felt like it might be true! Something is changing

 

Yay!!! This is awesome - I’m so happy for you lovely.  Yippeeeee! Do you have a RAT test to test yourself? It could be Benzo flu. Xxx

 

Thanks Bess. Rat tests are like trying to find a needle in a haystack and no way am I getting PCR. So far today I feel ok so maybe just a rough day

 

RAT’s are indeed rare beasts.  Benzo flu can mimic COVID symptoms in 2920 I had a ton of PCR tests - so many that I think the nurses knew me at the drive through testing place.  Oh nothing like a bit of Benzo health anxiety when you’re in the thick of it.  Enjoy your day lovely.  I’m so happy for you lovely - you deserve this and so so much more.  Xxxx

[[An...]]

shayna, when someone says that they sleep to much and it bothers them, I always want to reply, "God, I would give anything to be able sleep all day."  But I wouldn't make that statement because that would piss them off.  I have very broken sleep and never sleep soundly,  Plus, I have too many responsibilities and stuff to take care of each day since I live alone.

 

LOL, same here Beck. I told a friend of mine in real life that I wish I could go to sleep for a solid year (after stopping benzos of course) and awake feeling great with all the benzo w/d crap gone. 

[[Be...]]

I get sick of people who complain when they have a caregiver who takes care of their every little need.  People are lucky who can sleep all day and have someone to cook for them, clean and do every little thing for them.  What do they have to complain about when they don't have to lift a finger to do anything for themselves?

[[An...]]

Yep, true. I had to go out and finish clean my front yard today bc I can not afford to pay somebody else to do it for me. Having a lot of money definitely makes life a whole lot easier.

 

^{edit: grammar correction 1/29/22  1:00AM US EST}

[[Be...]]

Having someone who takes care of all your need is a blessing.

[[He...]]

I used to be able to sleep 10 hours straight maybe getting up to use the restroom once. I was awake and refreshed every day. It was nice. I haven't experienced that in a long time.

 

Also, on the concept that it must be nice to have all your needs and desires catered to; I agree with that. They say "Money doesn't buy happiness" but I know a few people who are very wealthy, sleep like babies, have people to do their bidding, live lives of spoil and they are very happy. I have everything I need in the world except sleep, for my morning anxiety to go away and money. If I had those things, I would be on cloud nine.

 

HM

[[Wa...]]

I will pray for you I pray for all of us do you believe in Jesus Christ?

[[Sh...]]

I believe in a higher power. U have to believe in something otherwise we just live on a rock floating thru space.

[Guest [An...]]

I'm agnostic, but have an open mind.

[[Be...]]

Try being happy when you're homeless on the streets with no money or can't pay your bills and your electric or other utilities get turned off for non payment.  Money does buy happiness in this world.  That's a lie that money doesn't buy happiness.

[[An...]]

Being financially secure, having enough money, does make your life a lot easier Beck. It would actually make getting off these wicked drugs easier. Think about it. There are a few benzo wise doctors scattered about who know about and use the Ashton protocol for benzo w/d. These doctors though are usually too far away from where you are located for treatment. If money was no object in your life, you could easily go to where these doctors are located and stay as long as you needed to..... to be treated. This is not possible if you don't have the money to pay for the expenses involved.

 

I have often fantasized what it would be like to be mega rich. I would actually give a great deal of the money away to help others, but always have enough to make my life as enjoyable and as comfortable as possible.