Meditations - by Melody Beattie

[[...]]

I haven't heard from Jozsef in months.  I hope he's alright.

 

I'm concerned as well Becksblue. I pray he's ok and full restoration to his health physically and mentally in Jesus name Amen. 

[[Be...]]

He told me in the last pm I got from him that he was writing a book. 

[[Jo...]]

I haven't heard from Jozsef in months.  I hope he's alright.

 

I'm concerned as well Becksblue. I pray he's ok and full restoration to his health physically and mentally in Jesus name Amen.

 

TMH. 🙏🏼

 

 

Thank you kindly for caring.  Helps a lot just knowing others care.  Hope you are doing ok.  I’m still havin’ it really rough n hurting bad… but I thank God for all the times he chooses to let us know he still loves us and that hope remains… especially since I can’t hardly ever feel him as I’m sure it must be the same for many in my shoes… but as u say… “rough seas make good sailors” right ?  We just gotta stay in the ship.  I hope he touches n comforts you always.

 

Kindly,

j

[[Jo...]]

Say “Woohoo”…Because There’s Hope

 

 

 

 

The doorbell rang one day. I was slumping about in the big house I had just purchased in Minnesota. It was going to be the dream home for the children and me. The problem was, Shane had been killed the day after I closed the deal. Now Nichole and I were rambling around wondering what to do.

 

I answered the door. The FedEx man asked me to sign for a delivery. I did. And he handed me a large cardboard box. I brought it into the living room and put it down without opening it up. I didn’t get excited about much of anything back then. I was sad and angry. People, my readers, said they liked my writing because it gave them hope.

 

The problem was, I didn’t have any of that hope for myself. I couldn’t see how life could or would ever make any kind of sense again. The one thing I wanted—my son alive and well, and my family intact—would not ever come to pass.

 

One day I got around to opening that big cardboard box. I took a knife, sliced it down the center, and looked at what was inside. It was filled with stuffed animals. A big green parrot with a fuzzy beak was sitting on top.

 

There were monkeys, bears, and assorted things. They didn’t look brand new, but they were happy, cheerful little things. I took out the card and read the note inside. This is what it said:

 

“I make my living out of taking all the stuffed animals that people throw away. Then I take them home and clean them up. I guess I like doing it just to prove a point,” the woman wrote.

 

“Sometimes, we start thinking something’s no good anymore, so we throw it in the trash. Sometimes we throw things away too quickly, but all they really need is a little tender, loving care to bring them back to life. I heard about your son’s death. I thought maybe getting a box of my reborn animals might help.”

 

Many years have passed since then. I’ve gotten rid of a lot of my possessions, especially when I moved from Minnesota to California in 1994. But one of the things I’ve held on to—in fact he’s still sitting in this room with me next to my desk—is the happy green parrot with the big fuzzy beak.

 

He’s a gentle reminder that even something as broken and scraggly as I was can be brought back to life again. Some things in life are true, whether we believe them or not.

 

Hope is one of those things.

 

Even if you have to say it in disbelief, say woohoo.

 

God, help me believe in me as much as you do. Thanks for getting me through those tough spots when I lose my faith.

 

by Melody Beattie

 

 

 

 

Job 14:7-9  For there is hope of a tree, if it be cut down, that it will sprout again, and that the tender branch thereof will not cease.  Though the root thereof wax old in the earth, and the stock thereof die in the ground; Yet through the scent of water it will bud, and bring forth boughs like a plant.

 

[[...]]

I haven't heard from Jozsef in months.  I hope he's alright.

 

I'm concerned as well Becksblue. I pray he's ok and full restoration to his health physically and mentally in Jesus name Amen.

 

TMH. 🙏🏼

 

 

Thank you kindly for caring.  Helps a lot just knowing others care.  Hope you are doing ok.  I’m still havin’ it really rough n hurting bad… but I thank God for all the times he chooses to let us know he still loves us and that hope remains… especially since I can’t hardly ever feel him as I’m sure it must be the same for many in my shoes… but as u say… “rough seas make good sailors” right ?  We just gotta stay in the ship.  I hope he touches n comforts you always.

 

Kindly,

j

 

Thank the Most High your back! I had wrote a response already about a week ago and somehow I deleted it by mistake. I finally found the time again to write you back!

 

I'm sorry to hear your hurting so bad. I get these waves and feel I'll never stabilize again, but I do it's just not on my timeline. I know being on benzos isn't a sin at this point wanting to get off so so bad. Yet I have to consider I took a pill that made me feel better and now I'm paying for lack of faith in him to get me through the trials I was going through back 20 plus years ago as a non believer. Like King David with his committing adultery and murder, there were definitely consequences he had to deal with the rest of his life. The mercy was there, the law said he should have been stoned to death. God still declared David had the heart of God and brought Jesus through his blood line and the Old Testament refers to Jesus as my servant David, what hope that brings me. I don't know why I wrote about David, it was the spirit that inspired me I'm sure. 

 

I firmly believe that we are going to be stronger in this life and the kingdom for what we're going through. There's has to be a purpose in Gods sovereignty for our suffering. His own became perfect through suffering on the cross, I'm sure you know the scriptures. That's why I have the good sailor quote. My screen name TMH means "The Most High" because there's no life outside of God.

 

Stay strong my friend, the board wasn't the same without you!

 

[[Jo...]]

I haven't heard from Jozsef in months.  I hope he's alright.

 

I'm concerned as well Becksblue. I pray he's ok and full restoration to his health physically and mentally in Jesus name Amen.

 

TMH. 🙏🏼

 

 

Thank you kindly for caring.  Helps a lot just knowing others care.  Hope you are doing ok.  I’m still havin’ it really rough n hurting bad… but I thank God for all the times he chooses to let us know he still loves us and that hope remains… especially since I can’t hardly ever feel him as I’m sure it must be the same for many in my shoes… but as u say… “rough seas make good sailors” right ?  We just gotta stay in the ship.  I hope he touches n comforts you always.

 

Kindly,

j

 

Thank the Most High your back! I had wrote a response already about a week ago and somehow I deleted it by mistake. I finally found the time again to write you back!

 

I'm sorry to hear your hurting so bad. I get these waves and feel I'll never stabilize again, but I do it's just not on my timeline. I know being on benzos isn't a sin at this point wanting to get off so so bad. Yet I have to consider I took a pill that made me feel better and now I'm paying for lack of faith in him to get me through the trials I was going through back 20 plus years ago as a non believer. Like King David with his committing adultery and murder, there were definitely consequences he had to deal with the rest of his life. The mercy was there, the law said he should have been stoned to death. God still declared David had the heart of God and brought Jesus through his blood line and the Old Testament refers to Jesus as my servant David, what hope that brings me. I don't know why I wrote about David, it was the spirit that inspired me I'm sure. 

 

I firmly believe that we are going to be stronger in this life and the kingdom for what we're going through. There's has to be a purpose in Gods sovereignty for our suffering. His own became perfect through suffering on the cross, I'm sure you know the scriptures. That's why I have the good sailor quote. My screen name TMH means "The Most High" because there's no life outside of God.

 

Stay strong my friend, the board wasn't the same without you!

 

THE MOST HIGH

 

 

That is some good stuff u wrote.  I’m gettin’ ya back once I get the energy God willing !!  Hopefully soon !!  Praise God… you’ve inspired…. Kindly, j

[[Na...]]

Letting Go of (our own) Timing

by Melody Beattie

 

 

When the time is right, child. When the time is right. How often have we heard those words—from a friend, a sponsor, our Higher Power?

 

We want things so badly—that job, that check, a relationship, a possession. We want our life to change.

 

So we wait, sometimes patiently, sometimes anxiously, wondering all the while: When will the future bring me what I long for? Will I be happy then?

 

We try to predict, circling dates on the calendar, asking questions. We forget that we don’t hold the answers. The answers come from God. If we listen closely, we’ll hear them. When the time is right, child. When the time is right.

 

Be happy now.

 

Today, I will relax. I am being prepared. I can let go of timing. I can stop manipulating outcomes. Good things will happen when the time is right, and they will happen naturally.

 

 

________________________

 

 

My (j’s) thoughts:

 

I was gleaning over this meditation and asking myself how this concept has helped me on this benzo journey.  I realize that for myself… it is very important for me to let go of timing… because when I put all this suffering and waiting into the tiny box called time… then I no longer need faith (or God) to keep helping me endure because by relying only on time kinda puts my faith out of the picture.  It keeps my spiritual eyes too focused on the goal… as opposed to the present place in the journey along the way there.  If I just have faith… and believe in God's timing… that sets me free to a degree to have more faith because now I can know that whatever my time is to obtain victory in this battle… it will be perfect timing whether I have to wait a long time or a short time.  Letting go OF MY OWN timing also frees me to not feel guilty for not being “successful” in my journey n fight by any particular set time.  I am allowing myself to trust that whatever the outcome… it will be for my good.  I know that God has made everything beautiful in his time… and trusting that and putting faith in that also frees me to encourage others in spite of how severe my condition is.  It helps me keep my spiritual priorities straight and it helps me to bear my own burden along with the burdens of others even in my weakness and suffering.  It also reminds me not to place heavy burdens on others by putting my expectations for healing upon them… so that I am free to encourage others regardless of where they are in their journey.  I can realize n understand that just like God has his timing for me… the same might hold true for others.  The important thing is to learn how to discern somewhat where people are in their journey so that I can meet them there and love them there with the right kind of love for where they are in their journey.

 

In other words… I won’t encourage someone who is already off benzos and almost fully healed… the same way that I would encourage someone who is stuck on benzos and can’t get off them and is very sick n dysfunctional.  Letting go of having my own timing is a good thing.  If I fail to let go of my own timing… I place myself at risk of stamping my timing on someone else.  If I succeed in letting go of my own timing… then I prevent myself from manipulating my own outcome… or the outcomes of others.  Each of us has our own painful journey… and by letting go of my own timing… I free myself to carry the burdens of others n not just my own.  I am then able to help bear the burden of the other person by not placing any judgment or expectations on them.  This… in and of itself creates a more positive n healing “environment.”  Pleasant words are like honey… health to the bones n sweet to the soul…. n what is truly needed is a more positive environment for healing, support, and recovery.

 

 

Kindly,

 

 

Oh, thank you for this! I'm in a really bad place right now and these words brought much hope and comfort to me. I would love to hear any kind words or encouragement from you!