My Ambiem withdrawal

[[50...]]

Any suggestions lonelysoul?

 

I’m desperate.

 

give SSRI a try.. that's the advice i would give myself, looking back. didn't do much but it stopped the akathesia.. thats more than enough for me

[[He...]]

I’ve tried lexapro, didn’t really help with anything so the doctor put me on valdoxan which I’m currently taking nightly.

[[Ma...]]

Thanks Mary, I’m already on propranolol and it only made me feel light headed and faintish during the panic attack yesterday. I’m exhausted. I know this is a process but these attacks come out of the blue with no triggers (I was safe at home) and they can last for hours.

 

I feel so trapped and that my hands are tied.

 

I’m also dosing 10mg Valium 3 times a day but that doesn’t seem to be helping much. Did I read somewhere that you said Valium isn’t effective for anxiety?

 

I was on Xanax, and it was great for anxiety, which is why I was on it.  Then the crossover to Valium, which I really struggled with.  Valium, unlike Xanax, has 3 metabolites, they each do something different .  One is muscle relaxant, another anxiety, and the other is sleep.  They all have different half lives and effective times.  So, to me, the Valium has never worked well on anxiety.  It works some, but nothing compared to Xanax, which it's primary function is anxiety. 

I am sorry so far, the Dr and us for that matter, have been able to find a way to help . I hope someone can help.  Mary 💜💜

 

[[Pa...]]

Thank you as always Pamster, it’s good to know you guys care.

 

Was it like that for you when you were going through withdrawal? Each day bringing a new set of challenges?

 

It's hard for me to remember details, I remember the pain but I can no longer feel it.  I compare my cold turkey from Klonopin to what you're feeling now and I know how brutal this is on you with no relief in sight.  I wish we had answers for you, I feel helpless.

[[He...]]

Hi Mary and Pamster, there’s really no need for apologies.

 

You guys are awesome, always lending a listening ear and giving invaluable advice.

 

The answers I feel I have to seek for myself. But I’ll remain on this board for a while yet if it’s ok with you guys.

[[Ma...]]

Hi Mary and Pamster, there’s really no need for apologies.

 

You guys are awesome, always lending a listening ear and giving invaluable advice.

 

The answers I feel I have to seek for myself. But I’ll remain on this board for a while yet if it’s ok with you guys.

 

Don't you dare leave.  You signed on for life  .  Just kidding, of course you can remain!  You never know when someone that hasn't been on in awhile will pop up, that has more of the same history as you.  💜💜

[[Pa...]]

You're always welcome, we're invested in you and want to see you happy.  And Mary, that's a great thought, maybe, just maybe there is someone out there with the answer and we just haven't met them yet.

[[He...]]

Just saw the doctor and he suggested taking a break from cutting for this week.

 

He also wanted to updose my ambien to 30mg at 8am (instead of 20mg currently) and 30mg at 4pm (instead of 25mg). Is this advisable and does it make sense?

 

He also switched my Valium timings to 8am (instead of 10am), and 2pm (instead of 4pm). But the total dose of Valium still stands at 30mg.

 

Lastly he prescribed me olanzapine twice a day to keep me sort of sedated and to keep the anxiety at bay.

 

Like many here I’m very wary of taking new meds and have read up on olanzepine. While it has a sedative effect, it has a whole host of other side effects like weight gain and diabetes if taken in the long run.

 

I’m very hesitant to take it after reading about it, any one care to offer any advice? It would be much appreciated.

[[50...]]

listen to your own body and find your own sweet spot for dosages. the doctor can't do that for you. only you can. you should be feeling some discomfort but enough that you could bare throughout the day

[[Pa...]]

I just looked up Olanzapine too, I don't blame you for being wary.  I wonder if you could delay taking it until you see how you feel on the increased Ambien?

 

I like what dre had to say, I wish you had the freedom to taper at your own rate, I know you're reaching the end of your rope these days.  Does your Dr provide you the pills each week or do you have a months supply?  Do you agree with the times he's got you taking your doses?  This is one area where I feel you could make your own choices. 

 

I'm happy to see you didn't give up, you're still here doing the work.

[[He...]]

Dear Pamster, yes I can taper at my own rate, my doc is generally supportive and does really listen to what I say. It’s just that I don’t exactly know how to do it myself thus I listen to him.

 

With regards to the olanzapine I’m intending to use it as a “only when necessary” tool if the panic attacks get too bad.

 

The ambien he suggests to increase by 15mg for a week but I’m quite determined to hold at the current dose for the week. Thus no increase since yesterday. Do you think I should updose?

 

Also, he just switched around the Valium time, he calculates once again when he thinks it’s the best time to take it so the drug peaks at the optimal time to tide over the anxiety.

 

Whether I agree with the timings he’s got me on the doses, I am really uninformed and if anyone at all could help me out with this I would be grateful.

 

With regards to the meds, ambien wise I have a supply of it myself (he knows  about it), and the rest like valdoxan and diphenhydramine, he prescribes it every week.

 

I guess in a nutshell, I follow his advice closely but am still able to modify the schedule and timings, but I don’t know how.

 

I sound ignorant for sure.

[[Pa...]]

We're all just flailing around in the dark Headspace, we may sound like we know what we're doing but everything is anecdotal, we have no science to back up much of anything we say.  This is because they invented a pill, approved it based on 30 days of use and let it loose on the world and we've been dealing with the fallout ever since.  The scientific and medical communities are barely starting to acknowledge there is a problem, a solution is decades away, we're all we have.  Okay, off my soapbox once again.

 

Good for you on trying to stay the course on your present dose, I know how difficult this is for you when you know relief is so near, you're so strong to even consider doing this.  I'm glad you're listening to him, I'm sure he's experienced and I'll bet you're making a great case study for him, you'll probably be anonymously famous, yay!

 

You've made it through some dark times and you're still here, I'm glad. 

 

 

[[Ma...]]

Dear Pamster, yes I can taper at my own rate, my doc is generally supportive and does really listen to what I say. It’s just that I don’t exactly know how to do it myself thus I listen to him.

 

The ambien he suggests to increase by 15mg for a week but I’m quite determined to hold at the current dose for the week. Thus no increase since yesterday. I’m not really sure if I should updose?

 

Also, he just switched around the Valium time, he calculates once again when he thinks it’s the best time to take it so the drug peaks at the optimal time to tide over the anxiety.

 

Whether I agree with the timings he’s got me on the doses, I am really uninformed and if anyone at all could help me out with this I would be grateful.

 

With regards to the meds, ambien wise I have a supply of it myself (he knows  about it), and the rest like valdoxan and diphenhydramine, he prescribes it every week.

 

I guess in a nutshell, I follow his advice closely but am still able to modify the schedule and timings, but I don’t know how.

 

I sound ignorant for sure.

 

You don't sound ignorant at all!  But before I say anything else, I maybe in love with your Dr 

Most of us are grateful if our Dr can write the prescription correctly, you have one that actually tries to work out the timing when the drug will help most.  I am so impressed, my jaw is open.  The way you would figure it out , just my opinion, would be your symptoms.  Which med is working on what symptoms the most, take it in time for it to be in your body when those symptoms normally start.  Sounds like your Dr is trying to do that, but really only you will know when you have the symptoms.  You can go on google and look up your med, see how long they take to work and work your schedule as close around that as you can.  Now it's very unlikely you aren't going to have symptoms but the goal is to make them tolerable.  Hope that makes sense.  💜💜💜

[[Ma...]]

Hey Pamster, missed you today 

[[He...]]

Hi Mary and Pamster, you guys always lend the best support.

 

Yes my doc is fully understanding, he works with according to the symptoms I present him each week. He is honest too, he said to me yesterday that yes this is entire exercise is an experiment. He doesn’t have a correct or magic formula that will work, he just tweaks it week by week.

 

The problem is where I’m at, There is no insurance  that will cover his cost so seeing him on a weekly basis is expensive. And he’s a private doctor, not like in a government hospital.

[[Pa...]]

Hey Pamster, missed you today 

 

Hey Mary, good to see you holding down the fort. 

[[Pa...]]

Hi Mary and Pamster, you guys always lend the best support.

 

Yes my doc is fully understanding, he works with according to the symptoms I present him each week. He is honest too, he said to me yesterday that yes this is entire exercise is an experiment. He doesn’t have a correct or magic formula that will work, he just tweaks it week by week.

 

The problem is where I’m at, There is no insurance  that will cover his cost so seeing him on a weekly basis is expensive. And he’s a private doctor, not like in a government hospital.

 

Ouch, out of pocket but you need him and he's keeping you safe so I hope you can find a way to keep him in your life. 

 

I figured he hadn't seen a case like yours, but you're the perfect patient. You're cooperative, you communicate and you're willing to do whatever it takes to get better, so good things have to happen, don't they?

[[Pa...]]

I'm helping another member with his taper and he's just crossed over to Valium.  He says all he want to do is sleep these days, like a bear hibernating, wouldn't that be wonderful?

[[He...]]

Hi Pamster, that would be wonderful indeed, to have Valium sedate you that heavily. I wish I could have the same experience.

 

I’ve decided to updose a bit (15gm total) and see if my situation stabilizers.

 

Yesterday was panic attacks again, they feel terrible and scary. Worse part is, you don’t know what you’re scared about. I really fervently wish I could keep them at bay.

 

I keep telling myself that it’s my brain healing, but I’m not sure how far this is true.

[[Pa...]]

Your Dr authorized this, so it's perfectly fine you're going to give going back up a try, I hope it keeps the panic at bay. I've never had one but they sound awful, I've never heard anyone say you don't know what you're scared about.  I guess it's just pure terror and if you don't know what you fear, then you can't reason your way through it.  I'm sorry.

 

How are you spending your days, what can you do to distract yourself?

 

 

 

 

[[He...]]

Hi Pamster, I’m spending all of my days at home on the couch, feeling like I’m walking on eggshells.

 

I’ve lost interest in any thing that I used to like. Even simple things like watching tv makes me feel nauseated.

 

The fear during a panic attack is so so severe I’ve never known anything like it.

 

I truly wish I had more windows of peace and calm, you’re an inspiration to all of us going through withdrawal.

[[Lo...]]

I relate to that feeling of losing Interest...Even watching TV pisses me off...or small talking with people.  One small step at a time. We must have faith.

 

 

[[Pa...]]

I couldn't watch TV either, it was too distressing for me, I was too agitated.  Its so hard to pass the time when all we've known to pass the time is painful or too taxing on our befuddled brains.  But distraction is the best way to get through this, laying and concentrating on our symptoms guarantees the days and nights will pass excruciatingly slow.  Yes, I know I'm stating the obvious and if you could you would, just have to be mom for a minute.

 

Since I've never had a panic attack, I have no idea if these suggestions are helpful, but they're worth a read, just in case.

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=13001.0

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=44839.0

 

I wish you could have a window of peace and calm too.

 

[[Lo...]]

Yup, distraction is Important. For me It's working out. If you have the energy try getting on a exercise routine a few days a week. That's been my biggest help, though at those high doses of Meds I understand If you can't. When I was on my highest dose of Ambien Exercise wasn't possible.

[[He...]]

Hi Pamster and lonelysoul, thanks so much for the tips on how to deal with panic attacks, much much appreciated!

 

I used to love hitting the gym but it’s not possible now, most times I can’t make myself get out of the house.

 

But yes I know distraction is key and shall be working on that.