Insomniac support group

[[ar...]]

Typically, I read in bed about 1/2 hour or 45 minutes, until I feel a little drowsy. Then I try to be still and get into a meditative state. If sleep is going to come, it will usually be within about 1/2 an hour after that. Regardless, I do my best not to get agitated for as long as possible. But after hours of that, I'll take a break, maybe read or watch TV for an hour, and then go back to bed and try again. This time, I also took a hot bath with epsom salt around 5 AM when the muscle pain went back into high gear. There are just times like these when NOTHING seems to help. All I can do is get through the day, try not to get upset about it, and hope for a better result the next night.

 

You nailed it when you said this:

 

"There are just times like these when NOTHING seems to help. All I can do is get through the day, try not to get upset about it, and hope for a better result the next night."  This sounds like acceptance which is a good thing.  Your brain will eventually change and you'll get it back.  The awesome thing is you're not giving in to taking the trazadone 

[[Al...]]

Shirah-My pdoc told me not to ever put on the TV. The light stimulates the brain and keeps you up. She told me if I could not sleep for more than 90 minutes of laying in bed then I should get out of my bed and go do a very boring task in another room. Do you take anything to sleep?

 

Arcade79-I'm happy that you slept for 5 hours straight. Please be careful of Unisom.

Fran

[[ga...]]

Unfortunately, I didn't have much luck with the meditation last night.  My anxiety got the best of me after a couple hours of laying awake.  Went from bad to worse.  Didn't take a unisom though...just toughed it out.  Feeling down and miserable today.  Just enough outside stressors that are contributing to my lousy nights.

[[Al...]]

Garton-I am so sorry to hear this. I hope tonight will be a better night for you. Did you try meditation oasis?

[[Ju...]]

If you are at all religious, starting to pray at night when awake will help.  I have had good luck with drifting off at this point.  I think that the praying encodes the prayer in my subconscious.

[[sn...]]

Shirah- so sorry to hear you didn't sleep well last night .  Fran that is awesome to hear no wake ups! Well I think vacation suits me as my sleep has slowly been getting better since I had a nice little get away.  Last night I slept from 9 pm-7.  I was so exhausted. I did wake up a couple of times but went back to sleep each time.  It's great feeling drowsy again.  Even yawning makes me happy.  For three months I hadn't yawned I was so overtired. 

 

A few things I did the past four days was spend a lot of time out in the sun, ate good food, and walked much more than I've been able to recently. I think all contributed to this recent improvement in sleep. Also very low stress the past couple of days. 

 

Shirah- is it possible for you to take a vacation to somewhere warm and sunny?  Walking around in the sunshine really helped me.  I decided to hold off on the acupuncture and I quit taking all supplements.  I figure the less I aggravate my body with any additional things the better.  Fingers crossed.

 

 

[[ga...]]

I did try oasis.  It just seemed I'd lay there listening to the music and her voice and found myself getting more agitated.  I gave meditation a try..maybe not a great effort years ago and didn't have good results.  Have to be a bit relaxed going into, which I was far from last night.  Might try again though.

[[Al...]]

Garton-don't give up. Meditation Oasis has been my life saver. I think the woman has the most smoothing relaxing voice.

 

Sniogra So happy to hear that you slept. Im going to tell you probably why you slept better while you were on vacation. You were walking around in the sunshine and you got some Vitamin D.  Being in the sun makes you feel good and you probably were not too stressed and you felt more relaxed. Walking is great exercise!!

 

It's going to be 66 and sunny in my hood on Thursday and I'm planning on sitting on my deck and getting about 20 minutes of sun.

Fran:)

 

[[Sh...]]

Sniogra - Glad you had a good vacation and slept. If I could just magically zap myself to a warm sunny vacation spot, I would. But in the state I'm in now, just the thought of figuring out where to go, making reservations, getting on a plane, etc., is exhausting. In fact, I was hoping to visit my Mom and sister in San Diego in May, but have been holding off making a definite plan, since I don't know what kind of shape I'll be in. I hope to make it though.

 

Arcade - Thanks, but I don't deserve congratulations on going med-free. I did end up succumbing to taking trazodone (not that it helped). Believe me, my end goal is to be off all meds. But right now, I'm in crisis mode, getting zero sleep most nights and losing too much weight.

 

Fran - Actually, this time I did not watch TV during the night/early AM. Truly, there was no logical reason I can think of for me not to have slept last night other than something physical going on in my brain. I know you're a problem-solver -- I recognize that, because I'm one also. But I must admit to being stumped on this. Time is probably the only thing that's going to heal me, but meanwhile I have to find a way to survive day to day.

 

Julianna - In times like this, I wish I were religious, but I'm not. But thanks for your suggestion on praying; it may well work if you're a true believer.

[[sn...]]

Shirah- do you not have an appetite? I found on my zero sleep nights I got to the point where I didnt feel like eating at all.  I lost a lot of weight in just a matter of days.  I felt like skin and bones.  I started drinking my bone broth much more recently.  I remember one day that is all I had since food had no appeal.  It contains high levels of glutamate which is responsible for generating GABA.  I'm also trying to eat GABA promoting foods and other foods to "feed" my neurotransmitters.

 

I know exactly how you feel about crisis mode.  It is hell. Remember this will pass. You will have a window...and then you will eventually have more and more.  I read the book "klonopin Withdrawal and Howling Dogs."  The author's one struggle was severe insomnia.  She didn't sleep at all and had been taking a very high dose of klonopin to sleep.  She took no other medications and then one night she slept one hour and eventually got up to two hours or so. 5.5 months later she began sleeping 7-8 hours a night.  It will come back! The book gave me hope. 

 

Garton- I had a rough patch of anxiety a few weeks ago and found that holy basil tea helped whenever I began feeling really anxious.

[[sn...]]

Oops I meant glutamine. It converts into glutamic acid. Which then turns into GABA.  Fran- did you finish reading "The Benzo Book"? I find it to be very informative...just started it. 

[[Al...]]

Sniogra-I read the book it's GREAT!!! I think on page 101 he mentions some very positive powerful comments about healing. What is the tea called that you drink for anxiety? That's one of the symptoms I have however it doesn't last too long and it's not every day, but I would like to try the tea.

 

Shirah-YES you already know me I'm a big problem solver..haha. May I make a suggestion? I know this helped me sleep in the beginning. I washed my sheets and my pillow cases all the time. It was so soothing getting into a clean bed at night. Maybe try that? Lot's of people take magnesium before bed and it does relax you and helps you sleep. There is a new sleeping pill my Pdoc told me about that does not effect GABA.

 

I feel so badly for you and I wish I could help you more. Please keep in mind that Dr. Ashton says sleep is so powerful that it will come back in time. You are going to heal and you will sleep. Recovery is not linear. Remember my hair was shedding for the past 4 weeks? Well it finally stopped shedding. Every symptom will abate in time. I promise you.

Fran

 

 

[[Sh...]]

Fran - Thanks for your kind words. I know you are sincerely trying to help, and appreciate your support. Please don't take it personally if your suggestions don't work for me though -- it's not you; it's my benzo-damaged brain.

 

Sniogra - Whenever I don't sleep, I become extremely symptomatic, with nausea, muscle aches, and most recently spasms. So I have no appetite and can only eat very small portions. I do want to try making the bone broth. In fact, I saved the bones and skin from a rotisserie chicken I had recently, but don't have the cider vinegar or a proper strainer in the house now. If I get some sleep tonight, I'll go out and get them.

[[Al...]]

Shirah-Your brain is NOT damaged it's just not balanced. You will heal in time. I promise you this!!! My brain isn't balanced either.

Fran

[[ga...]]

I really like hearing the brain will return to normal.  So frustrating that I am letting issues that prompt anxiety get to me.  Work related, most of them.  Maybe some of the tea may help.  It's just 6 in the evening hear and I am having a glass or two of red wine in order to unwind a bit.  I just need to slow my mind down at bedtime which is still 4 hours from now.

 

I agree...prayer would be good if you believed in it.  I know believing in a power greater than us would help but I am in the same boat.  I am basically in the agnostic camp.  So praying won't really help me...even though I have tried it from time to time.  Who am I praying too?  Not sure...just a higher power I guess.

 

Wish everyone a good night and some sleep tonight.

[[sn...]]

I drank holy basil tea as needed.  Organic India Tulsi is the brand. I feel like it helped me get through some rough patches when I had very little sleep and had lots of anxiety.  Holy basil is an adaptogenic herb that lowers cortisol levels and has lots of anti-oxidants.  Ashwaghanda and rhodiola are similar but I found those two to be too stimulating. People react from herbs differently so it may not work for everyone.  I'm sure that chamomile tea would also have similar effects, but I find the tulsi tea worked better for me. 

 

Hope everyone gets some much needed rest!

[[Al...]]

Garton-You're not supposed to drink any alcohol. Some people don't drink for years even after a full recovery.

[[by...]]

  It's just 6 in the evening hear and I am having a glass or two of red wine in order to unwind a bit.  I just need to slow my mind down at bedtime which is still 4 hours from now.

 

 

 

1. Alcohol ruins sleep for up to 5 hours after consumption.

2. Alcohol affects the same neurotransmitters as benzos  -- so drinking the wine regularly will stop your brain from healing.

 

[[ga...]]

Thanks for the advice on the wine.  I don't drink it regularly and I know it can disrupt sleep.  I do know I have had a miserable few days and just need some relief.  Benzos are a no go for sure.  I have tried the unisom now and then with mixed results.  Tonight is the wine...we'll see.....  I really need a break tonight and am desperate for a few hours.  I am done with the wine and feeling a bit more relaxed now which I haven't for the last few days.

[[by...]]

Thanks for the advice on the wine.  I don't drink it regularly and I know it can disrupt sleep.  I do know I have had a miserable few days and just need some relief.  Benzos are a no go for sure.  I have tried the unisom now and then with mixed results.  Tonight is the wine...we'll see.....  I really need a break tonight and am desperate for a few hours.  I am done with the wine and feeling a bit more relaxed now which I haven't for the last few days.

 

Hydroxyzine works for anxiety and sleep -- it has helped me

 

[[MT...]]

Isn't that book "klonopin Withdrawal and Howling Dogs" a helpful one for us insomniacs. So many of the other books have very difficult recovery stories but the sleep isn't as bad. She gives me more hope but I can't imagine tolerating it as long as the author. The Benzo Book is helpful too. I'm reading that now. He doesn't seem to think much of anything helps with wd though.

 

Shirah, I feel your pain here. You've had a lot of sleepless nights. I've had a crappy sleep week but had one night in there that was better. This insomnia recovery seems to take so long.

 

What's the bone broth recipe? Is there any research that supports it?

 

I'm hoping this is the week where some small bit of natural sleep happens.

 

Garton, I worry about you and the wine but I also understand the desperate need to get some relief. I hope you have a better night. That we all have a better night!

[[ga...]]

Thanks so much for your support.  Yes..I am desperate after a few miserable nights.  As bad as it's been in a long time.  Hoping for beter and trying to avoid putting to much pressure on getting to sleep tonight.

[[MT...]]

Fran - Thanks for your kind words. I know you are sincerely trying to help, and appreciate your support. Please don't take it personally if your suggestions don't work for me though -- it's not you; it's my benzo-damaged brain.

 

Sniogra - Whenever I don't sleep, I become extremely symptomatic, with nausea, muscle aches, and most recently spasms. So I have no appetite and can only eat very small portions. I do want to try making the bone broth. In fact, I saved the bones and skin from a rotisserie chicken I had recently, but don't have the cider vinegar or a proper strainer in the house now. If I get some sleep tonight, I'll go out and get them.

 

Shirah, I had a terrible time with weight loss and weight maintenance with wd. Now there is some fluctuation between zero appetite and the munchies but I tend to lose it when I have the nights of zero sleep. I used to work with people with eating disorders and learned a lot of tricks to put weight on. I have a green smoothie every day (almond milk, gluten-free, dairy free protein powder, frozen fruit, and spinach). When my weight is too low I add 1-3 teaspoons of olive oil to add calories and healthy fat. It's sweet and you don't taste the spinach and it's super nutritious.

 

I get the trots after I don't sleep also. Does anyone else have that happen?

[[Si...]]

Here I am again not sleeping. I had a decent run of sleeping every night for the past 7 days. Some of those nights were only 3 or 4 hours, but at least it was something. This is so frustrating. We just got back from a trip in another time zone. So I lost an hour there. I just don't get how I have to deal with this again after sleeping great for months.

[[Al...]]

Good morning everyone. I hope that everyone is still getting their zzzzzzzzzzzzz's.

 

I got 8 hours of sleep last night. I did not sleep through the night but that's okay!! I got off my computer earlier at 9:30 because I felt tired. I slept 10:20 PM-3:15AM (that's my mo I'm convinced). I listened to meditation oasis but it did take me a while to fall back to sleep. I never look at the clock but I think I was up for at least one hour. I felt very relaxed and I am training my brain not to stress about being up in the middle of the night. I now enjoy the quietness and peacefulness at 3:00 AM as opposed to always stressing why am I up, can I fall back to sleep etc? Waking up every night at 3:00 AM and popping a valium is what got me into trouble. I did fall back to sleep until 7:00 AM.

 

The only thing I did different last night was I ate a lot of broccoli which is supposed to help you sleep. I've had it two nights in a row and I slept.....hmmmmm! Also I had a dream. Does anyone know what it means when you start having dreams and you remember them?

 

I can't wait for my buddies to wake up so I can hear how everyone slept:)

Fran