Completely Healed at Almost 7 months off After 7 Years of Klonopin!!

[[Mo...]]

Hi more chocolate. I'm so glad to hear about your healing, and thank you for being so honest and open about it. I'm also thrilled that you will be working in this field because you will be so compassionate and understanding having been through what you have. I also wanted to ask how many months off were you when the anxiety and DP/DR left?

 

I am 11 months off and have been doing very well, and then bam, anxiety, shaky and fog again. It can be discouraging, but I believe I will be completely well again. Just curious when it happened for you. Thank so much for sharing your story.

 

All my best to you

Love Jackie :smitten:

 

 

Thank you for your kind words. . I would say the dp/dr was gone at about 18 months off. I have had some anxiety last month, but it was short lived.

[[Mo...]]

Hi everyone. I guess it's time for an update. I have not posted on here in so long! I am now a little over 25 months off. Today, I feel great! I am raising 2 kids on my own and running a business, so that says a lot.

 

I have recently recovered from a nasty 3 month wave that kicked my ass! I thought it was never going to end! It was so hard to accept that after being well for so long that I was now desperate again. When you are in a wave, your mind goes right back to despair and you are convinced that you will never get better. It's hard to think of anything positive when you feel like dying. I just spent 3 months with extreme vertigo/dizziness, terrible insomnia, dp/dr, blurred vision, fear, stomach problems, lots of nausea and lack of appetite, fatigue, and just a weird chemical feeling.

 

I'm happy to say that my mind is clear again. I had a difficult time working these last 3 months because in order to help my clients, I need to be strong. (I counsel people with anxiety and those in withdrawal). Thankfully, my clients understand exactly what it's like to get hit with a wave.

 

For those of you who are far out and stuck in a wave, it will pass! For those of you who think you will be dizzy forever and never heal.....you will! You are all very strong and I know you can do it. If you hold on a little longer, I promise it will get better.

[Guest [...]]

Thankyou MoreChocolate!Im so happy you are at 25months!That is a great accomplishment,considering the many,many days of tortuous symptoms we go through each day!Thanks for telling about the 3 month wave,it helps to hear about peoples waves and windows,as it seems to be a very common pattern with alot of us, that comes and goes-even at many months off.I have noticed an up and down wave pattern at 14 months,where it will change at different times during the day.Clear headed for awhile,then slammed with fog,balance problems and the rocking boat feeling.Wooziness changes more often now,with glimpses of easing up,to get slammed again.I was wondering if any of you guys have gotten a pattern of fairly normal nights,then the waking up during the night with a pounding heart and anxiety like in early withdrawal?Also I get times during the day where the internal shaking starts again with some antsy anxiety feeling,but it does leave quicker and doesnt last all day like earlier in withdrawal.Anyone get this stuff still?I wish everyone a wonderful weekend,with happy windows of feeling good!

[[Te...]]

Morechocolate, I'm very happy for you, so glad to read that your head is clear and that the dizziness/vertigo are gone!!! 25 months - what a wonderful accomplishment!!!

 

Can I ask a few questions: What do you think causes the vertigo? I used to have terrible weekly bouts of it, and it gradually lessened. I hadn't had a bout recently until yesterday. During the vertigo the only thing I can do is get down on the floor quickly or crawl to a chair. Otherwise I'd collapse. I can barely move during one of these. The room starts spinning, and I break out into a cold or hot sweat, and close my eyes, waiting for the worst to pass. I'm starting my 16th month off.

 

I ate a salad that was low in protein yesterday, and I started feeling "off" after that, just fuzzy-headed. I was doing some meditation in bed and taking a bit of a nap and felt relaxed when I woke up, but the dizziness started up, and then I was doing the dishes a half-hour after taking some blood pressure pills, and suddenly I couldn't stand any longer. The vertigo hit.

 

What do you suggest for when these happen? What have you done to help yourself? I truly think that my blood pressure pills are wreaking havoc with my body, but I need to go slowly to taper off of them. It will probably take me more than a year.

 

Thanks so much for any tips you can give me!!! And again, congratulations to you!!!

[[Mo...]]

Thankyou MoreChocolate!Im so happy you are at 25months!That is a great accomplishment,considering the many,many days of tortuous symptoms we go through each day!Thanks for telling about the 3 month wave,it helps to hear about peoples waves and windows,as it seems to be a very common pattern with alot of us, that comes and goes-even at many months off.I have noticed an up and down wave pattern at 14 months,where it will change at different times during the day.Clear headed for awhile,then slammed with fog,balance problems and the rocking boat feeling.Wooziness changes more often now,with glimpses of easing up,to get slammed again.I was wondering if any of you guys have gotten a pattern of fairly normal nights,then the waking up during the night with a pounding heart and anxiety like in early withdrawal?Also I get times during the day where the internal shaking starts again with some antsy anxiety feeling,but it does leave quicker and doesnt last all day like earlier in withdrawal.Anyone get this stuff still?I wish everyone a wonderful weekend,with happy windows of feeling good!

 

Thanks 2200! I noticed toward the end, my symptoms were as you were describing. Fine one night, not the next. Fine one minute, not the next. I would have moments during the day where I felt the inner vibrations and boatiness and an hour later it would be gone. Later in the day, it would come back for a bit. I would sleep well one night and then terrible insomnia or toxic sleep for a few nights. Lately I have been sleeping so beautifully.

 

You are healing. 

[[Mo...]]

Morechocolate, I'm very happy for you, so glad to read that your head is clear and that the dizziness/vertigo are gone!!! 25 months - what a wonderful accomplishment!!!

 

Can I ask a few questions: What do you think causes the vertigo? I used to have terrible weekly bouts of it, and it gradually lessened. I hadn't had a bout recently until yesterday. During the vertigo the only thing I can do is get down on the floor quickly or crawl to a chair. Otherwise I'd collapse. I can barely move during one of these. The room starts spinning, and I break out into a cold or hot sweat, and close my eyes, waiting for the worst to pass. I'm starting my 16th month off.

 

I ate a salad that was low in protein yesterday, and I started feeling "off" after that, just fuzzy-headed. I was doing some meditation in bed and taking a bit of a nap and felt relaxed when I woke up, but the dizziness started up, and then I was doing the dishes a half-hour after taking some blood pressure pills, and suddenly I couldn't stand any longer. The vertigo hit.

 

What do you suggest for when these happen? What have you done to help yourself? I truly think that my blood pressure pills are wreaking havoc with my body, but I need to go slowly to taper off of them. It will probably take me more than a year.

 

Thanks so much for any tips you can give me!!! And again, congratulations to you!!!

 

Hi Terry! . I'm sorry you are dealing with that awful vertigo! I refer to it as my kryptonite!

 

The benzos suppress our vestibular center. Because it was suppressed for so long, it no longer knows how to function on its own and thus it is temporarily damaged. The longer we are off the drugs, the more it heals. This is why it comes and goes. It is constantly trying to "fix" itself.

 

I used to try to figure out what was causing the dizziness: food, blood pressure, stress, lack of sleep.......  Over time, I came to the conclusion that my brain is temporarily damaged and is healing. Only time will help.

 

I found that distracting from it was helpful. When I wasn't too dizzy, I would keep busy because sitting still often felt worse. When I was very dizzy, I would lay down with my head propped up and close my eyes. I also found that distracting my mind while laying down helped. For dxample, I would recite my multiplication table in my head: 2x1=2, 2x2=4, 2x3=6....etc....

 

I also had a fantastic coach who helped me through my withdrawal. I wouldn't have made it without her support.

 

Hang in there Terry. It will get better

[[Te...]]

Thanks so much, Morechocolate, for your reply! I do what I can to distract when I have vertigo. Doing multiplication tables sounds like a good idea! You're right, the brain is temporarily damaged and has to get back to normal again. It can't do heal without upheaval after all its been through. Thanks for the advice!!!

[Guest [...]]

Thankyou MoreChocolate!!!

[[Ca...]]

So happy for you Morechocolate! Your posts have been very helpful...thank you.  Enjoy every moment.

 

Warmly,

 

Carita

 

[[bh...]]

So happy for you Morechocolate, I really need to hear this.

[[In...]]

It's wonderful to read that people can feel better again after a major setback out of nowhere. Thank you for sharing, very happy for you!

[[Pu...]]

Hi everyone. I guess it's time for an update. I have not posted on here in so long! I am now a little over 25 months off. Today, I feel great! I am raising 2 kids on my own and running a business, so that says a lot.

 

I have recently recovered from a nasty 3 month wave that kicked my ass! I thought it was never going to end! It was so hard to accept that after being well for so long that I was now desperate again. When you are in a wave, your mind goes right back to despair and you are convinced that you will never get better. It's hard to think of anything positive when you feel like dying. I just spent 3 months with extreme vertigo/dizziness, terrible insomnia, dp/dr, blurred vision, fear, stomach problems, lots of nausea and lack of appetite, fatigue, and just a weird chemical feeling.

 

I'm happy to say that my mind is clear again. I had a difficult time working these last 3 months because in order to help my clients, I need to be strong. (I counsel people with anxiety and those in withdrawal). Thankfully, my clients understand exactly what it's like to get hit with a wave.

 

For those of you who are far out and stuck in a wave, it will pass! For those of you who think you will be dizzy forever and never heal.....you will! You are all very strong and I know you can do it. If you hold on a little longer, I promise it will get better.

 

I'm so happy for you! I am currently in a wave. It started at the beginning of the month. I'm full of fear, doubt, anxiety, depression. I hate the voice in my head continuously asking, "Will this ever go away?" I know it will, but as you know, it's hard to think rationally when your mind is full of doubt and anxiety.

[[Lo...]]

Hi everyone. I guess it's time for an update. I have not posted on here in so long! I am now a little over 25 months off. Today, I feel great! I am raising 2 kids on my own and running a business, so that says a lot.

 

I have recently recovered from a nasty 3 month wave that kicked my ass! I thought it was never going to end! It was so hard to accept that after being well for so long that I was now desperate again. When you are in a wave, your mind goes right back to despair and you are convinced that you will never get better. It's hard to think of anything positive when you feel like dying. I just spent 3 months with extreme vertigo/dizziness, terrible insomnia, dp/dr, blurred vision, fear, stomach problems, lots of nausea and lack of appetite, fatigue, and just a weird chemical feeling.

 

I'm happy to say that my mind is clear again. I had a difficult time working these last 3 months because in order to help my clients, I need to be strong. (I counsel people with anxiety and those in withdrawal). Thankfully, my clients understand exactly what it's like to get hit with a wave.

 

For those of you who are far out and stuck in a wave, it will pass! For those of you who think you will be dizzy forever and never heal.....you will! You are all very strong and I know you can do it. If you hold on a little longer, I promise it will get better.

 

Now this made my day!!! It really did! So happy for you MoreChocolate! :smitten: :smitten:

[[Kn...]]

This is my favorite story! 

[[wa...]]

Hi Morechoclate. Wow this post is long! I also took klonopin for 7 years and stopped cold turkey (weened from 2mg to 1mg for 2 weeks - then stopped completely) and at 8 months off, all of the negatives just went away. If this is a window, then it is the longest one I have ever experienced (5 weeks). I am just curious, and forgive me if you have answered this already, but did your anxiety/panic attacks just abruptly end all of the sudden and not return for a long time, or did they gradually decrease to nothing? Mine just abruptly stopped and have not returned right around my 8 month mark, and it has been just over 9 months now since I have last taken a benzo. I would like to say that I am completely healed, but I don't want to jump the gun in making this assumption. I believe that it is finally over, but I am going to give it another month before I come to that conclusion.

 

Congratulations!!!!

[[Cl...]]

Veri inspiring stories in here! Thank you guys! I wish you all the best 

[[...]]

What a success story.

 

I have 2 boys and now I can not do anything for them except food.

I used to take them everywhere soccer, piano...camping.. vacation.

Now they sit in front of TV all the time which is so pathetic

 

Now I believe in 6-7 month of time, I will be like you, enjoying my life and family again.

 

Thank you!

[[Ar...]]

This story was so wonderful to read today.  Reading what others write is so encouraging.  Thank you. 

[[il...]]

Thanks so much for sharing! I cannot wait for the sweet, sweet day when I wake up to no symtpoms. Even on good days, I'm only at about 50-60%, and that hasn't even lasted all day. I hope that's not indicative to when my "healed" time will be. Thanks again and enjoy your new life!!!

[[Ar...]]

I re-read your success story again.  It gives me so much encouragement.  I can identify with your symptoms and feelings.  Wishing you the best continued health.  Thank you for sharing your journey. 

[[Be...]]

I just screen shotted your success story as my tinnitus is screaming. I keep reading it again and again. This is my baddest symptom and I feel so miserable to feel to be stuck with this forever. This is maddening! My head is about to explode! It is so good to know that your T is gone in 7 mos.

 

I wish everyone a quick and complete healing!

 

 

[[Dr...]]

There must be a great deal of luck in this whole thing. My tinnitus is also driving me up whatever walls are left for me to climb. I say that  because the insanity of derealization has me in another world all together. All of the walls are converging into one huge snake pit. I only come here to keep my signature straight with whatever time it is. My only hold on "reality". I'm not even sure why I'm typing this right now. I have not been able to post anything at all on this forum for quite some time. I'm terrified all the time.

You are very lucky to be "healed". I'm beginning to believe that permanent damage has been done. At this point it is different and yet seems worse after over two years "free" from that damn drug.  Sorry to have chimed in. I will go back to my own private hell.  :'(

[[Be...]]

There must be a great deal of luck in this whole thing. My tinnitus is also driving me up whatever walls are left for me to climb. I say that  because the insanity of derealization has me in another world all together. All of the walls are converging into one huge snake pit. I only come here to keep my signature straight with whatever time it is. My only hold on "reality". I'm not even sure why I'm typing this right now. I have not been able to post anything at all on this forum for quite some time. I'm terrified all the time.

You are very lucky to be "healed". I'm beginning to believe that permanent damage has been done. At this point it is different and yet seems worse after over two years "free" from that damn drug.  Sorry to have chimed in. I will go back to my own private hell.  :'(

Dreamovie

I'm so sorry you are still suffering. I'm still in acute phase of recovery but I have a bad feeling that I'll be forever stuck with this. How long have you been suffering from this or when did you gain it?

[[Dr...]]

Hello Beste,

Thank you for at least being interested. All of your questions can be answered just by reading my "signature".  That is what I was talking about when I said I come to BB just to "keep my signature straight". The entire history of this crap is all right there at the bottom of my, and everybody else's posts. This is hell on Earth.

[[Fa...]]

Wow! I can't believe I'm writing this! I remember coming here when I started my taper, reading the success stories and crying uncontrollably. I was so envious of these people and I was convinced that I would never be normal again. I would never be able to post a success story. I could not have been more wrong!

 

I started off on this site as nomore75, but lost my information and decided to just create a new account. If you go back and see my original posts, you will see how much I suffered. Nothing could have prepared me for this experience! Even with my education and intelligence, I was clueless as to what long term benzo use and withdrawal would entail. Not many people get it. People still don't believe me when I try to tell them what I went through. How could they? Unless you have experienced this, you can't even fathom!

 

So these are some of the things I went through. The last year on Klonopin, I was a complete mess! I had terrible agoraphobia, major panic attacks, constant dizzy spells, heavy DP/DR, migraines, and depression. I had no idea what was going on! I was constantly at the ER, convinced that I was dying. I payed numerous visits to my doctor. Not one doctor suggested that it could be my meds making me sick! Not one!!! I was told to up my dose because my anxiety was out of control. I was so lost. I needed to find out what was wrong with me. I was always a very strong, independent and outgoing woman so there had to be something going on. I went online and researched anxiety and panic. My research eventually led me to this site. I was so relieved to find people going through the same thing and the reason why. It was the Klonopin! As relieved as I was, I was also terrified! After reading many posts on here, I decided to start tapering. I wanted off so bad! I wanted my life back! I did this without my doctor.

 

What a nightmare I went through tapering! I made big cuts and quick. There was no way I was going to drag this out. My worst symptom was dizziness/vertigo. It was awful and so debilitating! I was sure I would be dizzy forever. The extreme fear was next in line. I was terrified all the time for not particular reason. I would feel it in the pit of my stomach and it would consume me. I can't put into words how scared I was. The morning was the absolute worst time! I couldn't think about my past and couldn't think about the future. It was too overwhelming! I would watch people living their lives, working, laughing, socializing and I was so envious and jealous at the same time. While they went on with their lives, I was struggling to get through an hour. It's unbelievable the thoughts you have when in withdrawal. I will tell you now, if you feel like that, it's just the benzos lying to you. You will not feel like that forever. I had deep, dark depression too. I would cry for days. I have never felt depression like that before. I wanted to die so many times.

 

I'm going to post this now so I don't lose everything I typed, then I will continue.

 

Wondering if you ever check back in here.  I tried to send you a PM, but it says you can't get them.