How many people HAVE to work while tapering

[[pe...]]

Hello,

Just thought I'd drop by to say I'm still tapering and still working. I appreciate the distraction I get from my work. Tomorrow's my last day before winter vacation. I'm hoping for the best, hoping it will be restful. I continue to feel the ups and downs. Last week was great with really manageable symptoms and this week is harder. I'm hoping the light comes back in a few days. It always does but feels so far away when things get tough. Up and down, back and forth.

 

Congrats to Etown and Smiff on their exciting work and school news, rocking it even during withdrawal.

 

Best to you all,

Peace2

[[Sm...]]

Also congrats E-Town. I remembered I didn't say that in yoga. Strangest things occur to you in yoga.. anyway.. congrats! I'm sure it is well deserved as I can see you being a highly supportive leader xx

[[Sm...]]

Ha. I also like the snail. Your snail and my tortoise can go head to head slow style

[[et...]]

Thanks Smiffy I could never have snailed without you!

I will lead if I lead on my knees

etown

[[Rr...]]

Smiff and Etown -- Congratulations and good luck!  Just like no one but you should control your taper, no one but you should decide what you can handle during w/d.

 

Speaking of which,

 

I've had an interesting opportunity come up this week. I've been asked to help write a proposal for building a playground in my in-laws' neighborhood. Long story, but I suggested this 7 years ago and no one was receptive to the idea. Since then, the demographics have changed--there are more families and fewer retirees. Don't know if I can handle it, but why not try?

 

Best wishes,

 

Rriver

[[Co...]]

Hi everyone....sticking my head out of the sand for a quick post. I have been really sick but seem to be pulling out of it. I finally rec'd my scale and am going to micro taper when I stabilize. I am grateful to be able to hear tonight. Tinnitus so bad it makes be crazy. My nausea seems better and I am looking ahead to better days. I will be back.

 

I might be down but I am not going to stay there.

 

Cheers from Colorado

[[Sm...]]

Great CC. Get stable and the microtapering should help

[[Rr...]]

That's great, CC!

 

Keep fighting 

[[dr...]]

Cc-just in time for Xmas!  Yay!!  Glad your starting to feel a bit better.  I'm off to my last Xmas dinner. Hope this one goes better than my last. Rephrase...it WILL be better. We made it to another Friday.

 

Drew

[[Co...]]

Friday night. Feeling better! Fixed my ticker factory. I am going to figure out my scale tonight and keeping moving forward. Your messages have made this so much easier to handle. My profile pic says it all. I am just keeping my head above water. I am stronger than benzos and am going to get through this. Love my BB friends.

[[et...]]

CC what a relief eh? Good on ya for hanging in there. Take advantage of the good times you have more on the way.

etown

[[Co...]]

Hey etown...one tough week. I am still here. Just trying to stabilize for the rest of the ride. I hope you are ok.

 

CC

[[La...]]

Friday night. Feeling better! Fixed my ticker factory. I am going to figure out my scale tonight and keeping moving forward. Your messages have made this so much easier to handle. My profile pic says it all. I am just keeping my head above water. I am stronger than benzos and am going to get through this. Love my BB friends.

 

Thats the type of thinking that really will get us through this.

[[et...]]

Good call Laser

etown

[[or...]]

Hi all:

 

On top of benzo woes I have strep throat OMG. I am TRYING to finish up a proposal I have been working on off and on for 3 days, aaarg. I will e-mail it to the client as soon as I can sit at my computer and think. I'm going back to bed now and will get up later on.

 

What a bummer. Just when I was starting to feel well from splitting my dose to 2 x a day.

 

Looks like I will be spending Xmas in bed or close to it in my pajamas. That's okay -- at least I have an understandable (to other people) reason for declining social activities.

 

You guys enjoy yourselves for me, okay?

 

Okatz

[[Mr...]]

Hello everyone on Tuesday night I was having major anxiety so I phoned the local crisis help line, I told the nice lady my whole history, I had called this line many times before.... Well I felt really really bad that nite and told her I had thoughts of takin lots of Advil, my cell phone then lost signal and before I could get reconnected ... 2 police cars and an ambulance showed up at my home, I went to

the local hospital where I signed myself in for 3 days... It was really rough being in wt really crazy people but i felt safe. I met a man there that was on 2 mg of Ativan for 20 years and he tried to hurt himself so he was there and they cold turkeyed him about 10 days before I got there .... Doctors just don't know about benzos. Well they would only keep me 3 days I got out Friday.... Sorry I use to be so positive to everyone wt all my posts. This is the hardest thing as u all know...I feel like up dosing or going back to the ER .... I just cant seem to use the coping skills or feeling this bad this long wt out more professional setting.

 

I'm am happy others are doing ok,

Best wishes to you all,

 

Mr scared, Ottawa

[[et...]]

Ottawa - Go back to ant dose that will calm this down and hings can only get better.

etown

[[Co...]]

Mr Scared...Hey. I am sorry to see that you are having big problems. I was in a bad spot also but am pulling out of it. I think that when you realize that you are having bad thoughts ( taking too many meds or scary thoughts you have to reach out and get help. You know as well as I do that this is a really bumpy ride. It is the huge swings up and down that make it so hard. I have been lucky in that I do not have thoughts of hurting myself or giving up. Depression is not the worst of the sx for me. I hope that you can find a way to keep going. The thing about w/d is that it gets so tough for so long that we get so exhausted. I have sat in my office at home really late at night. Sick and so tired of it. I have thought how easy it would be to go get that bottle of valium and take 2 or 3. But I cannot do that. You know why. I can't do this again. I was on klonopin for so many years. I realize now that I was sick for years. I was in w/d between doses and never knew it. Hang in there. Stabilize and try to keep going. You have overcome a lot already. Look ahead. Keep thinking to yourself, "I can do this."

 

Big hug from Colorado

[[Co...]]

Hey y'all,

 

So I hit the skids again and stayed that way for 12 days or so. I started to pull out of it again a few days ago. I had an invitation to a Christmas party last night. After being under a wet blanket for weeks I got up and got dressed about 8 o'clock last night. Feeling a bit dicey but it was a beautiful night and you never know what you are capable of until you try it.I went. The music was playing and ice cubes were clinking and I was looking at a bunch of friends that I have not seen in a long time.'Where have you been?' over and over. I heard a song start to play. I was not feeling that great but I was there. I went onto the dance floor and started moving and the next 2 hours flew. Wow. It felt good. I got home at midnight. Really exhausted and nauseous. But...I did it. Woke up feeling crummy but boy did I have a good time last night. I am starting to find a way to just grab the good hours when they are here. You know what happened last night? I remembered what it was like to feel good. Even if it was only for a few hours. This is what keeps me going. It still amazes me that I can be floor hugging sick one week and feeling ok the next. Tomorrow may be completely different but for now I am ok.

 

A positive post.

[[La...]]

Great to hear you had a good night CC "out on the dance floor." I suspect that you will be having more and more of these windows in the near future. At some point, the windows will likely blend together in one continuous and permanent feeling of joy.

 

Happy festivus!

[[Ca...]]

So happy for you CC...more is coming!

Love,

Carita

[[et...]]

CC way to go I'm crying happy tears for you right now

Etown

[[...]]

Hey y'all,

 

So I hit the skids again and stayed that way for 12 days or so. I started to pull out of it again a few days ago. I had an invitation to a Christmas party last night. After being under a wet blanket for weeks I got up and got dressed about 8 o'clock last night. Feeling a bit dicey but it was a beautiful night and you never know what you are capable of until you try it.I went. The music was playing and ice cubes were clinking and I was looking at a bunch of friends that I have not seen in a long time.'Where have you been?' over and over. I heard a song start to play. I was not feeling that great but I was there. I went onto the dance floor and started moving and the next 2 hours flew. Wow. It felt good. I got home at midnight. Really exhausted and nauseous. But...I did it. Woke up feeling crummy but boy did I have a good time last night. I am starting to find a way to just grab the good hours when they are here. You know what happened last night? I remembered what it was like to feel good. Even if it was only for a few hours. This is what keeps me going. It still amazes me that I can be floor hugging sick one week and feeling ok the next. Tomorrow may be completely different but for now I am ok.

 

A positive post.

That's all GREAT to hear. I'm all for grabbing the good hours. Even if you don't feel so well the next day, you can still remember what it felt like to be alive, right? 

[[...]]

Hi Everyone,

I am on vaca until January 6th so I am sending all my love for those who must work through the holiday 

 

CC I love your post.  You are obviously one tough lady.  So glad you scales arrived and am looking forward to reading posts about how much better you feel once you start daily tapering.

 

If I am not back on here before Christmas - Merry Christmas to All 

[[...]]

Did Everyone notice that Etown posted a dose reduction?

 

[move]Way to Go Etown!!![/move]