Over 60 help and support.

[[ea...]]

I try hard not to lie now. Learned that in my own journey off benzos.  We older people have so much more of life's lessons behind us. Hurts and JOYS!

Yes, I wish I was younger now, especially since I am now off benzos. I would have liked to know the woman I was before I began taking benzos. I am so sure I would have made better decisions.

But here I am, I turn 70 this March. My life isn't perfect, but whose is? I have my joys and problems, but at least they are no longer caused by those damn benzos.

Annie

God, this stuff IS difficult to deal with.

[[fr...]]

Hi,

  I am four weeks off Ativan after 20 plus years of 1MG at night for sleep. Only problem is insomnia and thats a big one.

Go slowly....to avoid bad side effects. I am seventy one.

Best of luck.

[[fr...]]

Hi Eastcoast62,

  May I ask how you did with sleep post taper?

[[Fi...]]

Hi,

  I am four weeks off Ativan after 20 plus years of 1MG at night for sleep. Only problem is insomnia and thats a big one.

Go slowly....to avoid bad side effects. I am seventy one.

Best of luck.

 

Congratulations on getting off of Ativan. Yes, I am going slow and steady to maintain some functioning. 

[[ea...]]

Friday,

I did not taper. I went CT off a thirty year addiction to benzos. NOR am I unhappy about that. I am grateful for that. I did not know how much benzos were affecting me, I just couldn't SEE this. Going cold turkey was dangerous, yes, but I had no choice in this. My med doctor forced me to do this.

My CT was simply awful, almost beyond mere words. Hallucinations, severe paranoia, severe fear. ALL my wd symptoms were strange and scary. I managed to hang on and get through it. But only with the help of my friends on BB.

I did not sleep a bit that first year off. NOT AT ALL. I got tiny micro sleeps  - moments when my brain blinked out. I did some research and found that POWS who were deliberately deprived of sleep had this. It is our brains way of protecting us, so we don't die of no sleep. I wont lie, not sleeping an entire year was realty awful. Like all of you I worried I would never heal, that I was stuck in some weird "never land" where nothing felt right or good. My emotions were all over the place that first year. One minute angry, one minute super stressed, anxious, then super fear took over. FEAR stayed with ne a long time.Wjatever happened, I found a way to deal with it.

Distraction was one of my best weapons. I just HAD to get my mind off benzo wd, I did all sort of silly things to do this. ABNYTHING that got my mind OFF benzo wd was fine. I also had to learn new ways to deal with anxiety. Slow deep belly breathing worked fine, and I had to practice this a lot.

 

Listen up, friends: No matter how bad you feel tonight, next week could be SO much better. Benzo wd is not "linear." It is not predictable. All of you will have ups and downs, and moments when you just do not think you will heal. abut you will.

huge hug for all of you,

east

[[CA...]]

Wow, eastcoast62.  You are absolutely amazing.  I have been thinking I just can't go on and then I read your post and your ending words certainly spoke to me:

 

"Listen up, friends: No matter how bad you feel tonight, next week could be SO much better. Benzo wd is not "linear." It is not predictable. All of you will have ups and downs, and moments when you just do not think you will heal, but you will."

 

Thank you!

[[fr...]]

eastcoast62,

  thanks for reply. You are a very strong person. Can only imagine what you have been through with c/t. of these drugs.

I hadn't expected to have such insomnia post taper. BENZOS are full of surprises . Nasty drugs.

When you didnt sleep did you find anything that helped like OTC meds, natural remedies, meditation etc?

Appreciate your input as you have journeyed ahead of me and your experience may help mine and others reading this.

Cheers.

[[52...]]

Hi. Someone on BB suggested listening to YouTube sessions on Yoga Nidra for sleep. I have found it to be helpful. Would love to know if others have used this. Wishing us all good health!

[[ea...]]

Friends, I am no stronger than you are. I got through a bad wd, but is was never easy. Honestly, sometimes I don't know how I bore it. But I did. My extreme paranoia about doctors kept me from reinstating. Thank GOD!

How I got through an awful cold turkey was with the help of BB. Period. I lived on BB for over a year, I read everything I could, and tried to make sense of what was going on within me. I was a huge mess of a woman then.

I got through it, just as you will. ALL of you are far stronger than you know right now. Going through benzo wd can make you or break you. Do not let it break you! Value your life, even if it isn't as perfect as you hoped it would be. Most of you have people you care about ,Jobs you may or not like but they pay the bills. You just have to keep on going, because you do care about your life.

Benzo wd does end. Usually with a whimper and a bang. God, that is an old saying...I just dated myself badly! LOL! Benzo wd ends. For most, slowly but surely. It seldom happens that someone wakes up to find benzo wd has just disappeared. It is usually a slow process, with ups and down, like a damn roller coaster.

But it sure does end, slowly but surely.

ALL of you will heal,  as long as you simply stay off benzos. It really is that simple.

Don't let the nasty benzo wd stuff scare you. That junk goes away.

east

[[ea...]]

I agree, gardner. The past couple months I have had fairly severe sciatic pain. If I bend over, when I get up the pain shoots down my legs, and I almost feel like I should just lie down. Am I scared? You bet I am. My work depends on my being able to move freely, just as everyones jobs are.  Today I did a two hour cleaning job that involved leaning over more than a couple times. The pain was pretty bad. I had resorterd to taking a low dose of Tramadol this morning, something I dislike doing.

Getting old is tough stuff. Our joints ache and swell. If you saw my hands you would gasp. Several knuckles are near deformed by osteo arthritis. They don't hurt much...yet. I currently have my 5th trigger finger, in my left middle finger., That knuckle is the biggest, which makes me worry about the surgery it will need. God, I hate seeing doctors now. Benzos cured me of that.

Whatever, I try to remain positive. Life has been so wonderful since I healed from benzos. Amazingly better.

east

[[Do...]]

East- it is always a pleasure to come upon your posts. You truly are a bright light here on BB!!

 

52- Yes!!! I have done yoga off and on for many years but always disregarded yoga nidra because I thought it would be too “slow” for me. So silly hearing myself say that when I have a terrible sleep history! I tried it in a class setting in December and was blown away. I fidgeted most of the time, not being able to lay on my back because of pain. But somewhere in that class I found calm because I left thinking I hadn’t really relaxed in the hour long class, only to realize the class had been TWO hours! It was very beneficial. I’m doing another class next Saturday. Can’t wait! Pretty sure the founder of Divine Sleep yoga nidra has a video on YouTube. I’ll see if I can find the link.

 

(Guided meditation)

 

(Excerpt from insomnia track on her CD) https://jenniferreisyoga.com/product/deep-relaxation-divine-sleep-yoga-nidra-with-jennifer-reis-copy/

 

The voiceovers are pretty silly but once you get past that, it’s awesome!

 

Happy weekend all!

[[ea...]]

Dontforget, thank you so much. I truly appreciate your saying that. Sometimes we on BB forget that everyone needs a lift, a boost.

I have not tried yoga. I am a bit afraid of it, given my back problems. Could you possibly PM me about this and tell me more, in a private sort of way? There is no way I could lie flat on a floor. I have trouble even getting DOWN on floors - due to the leg I injured so badly, thanks to freaking benzos. Could a yoga class accommodate someone  like me?

I truly do want to know more.

east (Annie)

[[52...]]

I would love to discuss with others my age (67). I am tapering off of Clonazepam (now down to 0.40 mg from 1 mg) and tapering about 10% a month. Of course it is based on my symptoms. I was put on Clonazepam for fibromyalgia.

 

Currently I having night sweats and some days trouble thinking. I have had more pain and am more irritable. So far I find these symptoms manageable.

 

My attitude is that I don't want age or my health status to get in the way of life. (Easier said that done). My priorities are spending time with my granddaughters, spending time with my husband, and working part-time.

 

I have questions for you all:

 

1) I have always LOVED to travel and wanted to do a trip to Central Europe, a trip we have wanted to do for a long-time. Have any of you traveled while tapering or in withdrawal? I would love to know about your experience.

 

2) When did your symptoms get worse? During tapering or afterwards? Have they abated.

 

Thanks so much.

[[fr...]]

Hi 52andforward,

      I travelled while on a taper of Ativan.  Two trips to Europe. I can say that travelling is a great distraction and just living the

great boost travel gives you I felt I was better at that time. My first trip was a four hour flight but staying with family so no problem.....did the tapering there. The second was our trip to Europe. I planned to get to a dose of 2.5mgs of Ativan and switched over to pill form as Ativan

comes in .5mg tabs and i could break in half.....carefully. The second trip to Europe I just took along a container to hold the DLMT and bought the vodka to mix solution in a store. You can buy those tiny bottles of spirits most places. I held the dose while away. I slept well too.

    Please enjoy your travel plans......you will not regret . Just hold at where you are until you return.

Best Wishes and Bon Voyage.

[Guest [Bn...]]

I have been doing Yoga Nidra before I even knew what had happened to me.  East you are a Warrior!  Thank you for sharing your experience with Us!

 

B

[[Do...]]

Dontforget, thank you so much. I truly appreciate your saying that. Sometimes we on BB forget that everyone needs a lift, a boost.

I have not tried yoga. I am a bit afraid of it, given my back problems. Could you possibly PM me about this and tell me more, in a private sort of way? There is no way I could lie flat on a floor. I have trouble even getting DOWN on floors - due to the leg I injured so badly, thanks to freaking benzos. Could a yoga class accommodate someone  like me?

I truly do want to know more.

east (Annie)

 

Hello dear friends. I hope you were able to have a relaxing weekend.

 

52- While I haven’t had the pleasure of traveling anytime recently, I am with Friday. Go live your life. Be sensible about it and as she said, if you need to hold to keep yourself stable while you do, so be it. You have exciting opportunities. GO FOR IT! 

 

BNot- You were lucky to find the yoga nidra when you did. I learned yoga probably right around the time I first started taking ADs. I wish I just focused on the yoga and let it heal me instead of the stinking drugs. It has taken me 30 years to find my way back to it. Sigh.

 

Per Annie’s questions about yoga, I did PM her but asked if she’d mind if I shared some of it here in case anyone else was reading along and was curious but didn’t feel the need to speak up. So here is some feedback to Annie’s questions. I hope that it will reach some of you who are trying to find some comfort.

 

Hey East!

 

I am not miss flexibility by ANY means!! I am 51 years old...and feel it! There is great movement in yoga currently to include all body shapes, sizes and those who need modifications. That is truly the heart of yoga but there was a trend towards power and hot yoga which really took us away from the true core of yoga. So, short answer is YES. There ARE yoga classes for you - or videos if you want to start at home (check out YouTube, Netflix and AmazonPrime)!! Yoga SHOULD BE a judgement-free zone. If you are in a class and find the vibe is otherwise, I would move on. I’ve done that a few times when I was getting an off feeling about a teacher. It has to be the right fit.

 

All asanas (or postures) have modifications and a good teacher will know to incorporate those for her students’ needs. I also have back issues which I am beginning to believe have been exaggerated over the years by benzo use. I am very NOT flexible, in my back particularly. I cannot do much that involves folding over my legs when seated. And anything with back bends, side bends....aw heck, anything bending :-o is tough for me. But I am learning to accept my body as it is and lean into it little by little. I just want to see a little progress over time. And I am. Acceptance (and healing) is becoming my friend...finally.

 

I would highly recommend researching the yoga studios near you. Ask friends and family who may take classes for feedback on places/teachers they like. Check the places out on Facebook and Instagram. Read through their class offerings on their websites. You can usually get a sense of what’s happening that way. And then take a beginners class. Some will offer beginners series which is really nice because you’ll get a better practice foundation. This in turn will also give you some confidence as you move forward in your practice. And if you attend a class where you feel judged, or pushed too far, or not supported, move on to another teacher or studio. Every one will have something different to offer since there are many different forms of yoga and different styles of teaching. I prefer teachers who lead a more spiritual class rather than a “power yoga” type class. I am not in the best physical shape and those classes can be difficult AND often be filled with younger students who are into serious fitness. Maybe I’ll get there someday... but I’m definitely not there yet!

 

I’ll keep an eye out for any videos, links that I think might be good for you. I have been checking out a lot of yoga instagram accounts lately. There is a lot of good stuff to discover once you start looking!

 

Let me know if I can help with any questions you have. Happy to share what I have learned!!

 

With your permission, I will share this info back on BB for anyone else who may be following that thread and be able to gain from sharing of info.

 

I hope you are having a nice weekend! I went for a 4 mile hike with a girlfriend today. It was 70 degrees here today...crazy!! Yoga tomorrow morning. Sundays at 10, in a salt room. Lots of benefits from salt therapy. Look it up!

 

Hugs,

J

[Guest [Bn...]]

 

I am 51 also.  But always very physically active. I was CT'd 5 months ago and it's been rough.  But I m healing.  I love hiking, walking, camping, fishing anything outdoors.  It was 70 here today too.  Beautiful and I am able to get out and walk the dog.

 

B

[[Ul...]]

Dontforget, thank you so much. I truly appreciate your saying that. Sometimes we on BB forget that everyone needs a lift, a boost.

I have not tried yoga. I am a bit afraid of it, given my back problems. Could you possibly PM me about this and tell me more, in a private sort of way? There is no way I could lie flat on a floor. I have trouble even getting DOWN on floors - due to the leg I injured so badly, thanks to freaking benzos. Could a yoga class accommodate someone  like me?

I truly do want to know more.

east (Annie)

 

Everyone's different, so I guess yoga just depends on the current situation. My back is a mess (one really bad car accident followed by two rear-ends a couple years later and two back surgeries), and my awesome physical therapist told me to definitely stay away from yoga. I sat in on a class that was for people with physical limitations like mine, and sure enough, that was a no-no for me. I learned other things I can do for strength and flexibility but it's a challenge. Just be careful, but you'll find what "fits" after some checking around. Good luck!

 

Jeff

[[Do...]]

Oh yes. Definitely agree Jeff! We are all searching for what can bring relief. I agree that you have to search for what fits for you!

I’m sorry for all you’ve gone through with your back. Back pain is no fun!

[Guest [Bn...]]

This is a yoga video I do at home.  Also a nice video on acceptance.  The mindful movement has quite a few out now.  Hope you enjoy them.

 

B

 

 

 

 

[[Ba...]]

Thanks, Bnot!

[[He...]]

I’m older now. I used to be youthful.

Due to all the stressors I have not

decided to taper yet. But I feel

lousy and scared every time I take

the cloz. Any supports provided I would

appreciate. I’ve scared for my mental health.

My life partner is a big support. I have

lost friends bc they don’t understand

what is happening to me.

I need a therapist who understands

what benzos do. Thanks .

[[Ma...]]

I’m older now. I used to be youthful.

Due to all the stressors I have not

decided to taper yet. But I feel

lousy and scared every time I take

the cloz. Any supports provided I would

appreciate. I’ve scared for my mental health.

My life partner is a big support. I have

lost friends bc they don’t understand

what is happening to me.

I need a therapist who understands

what benzos do. Thanks .

 

I am so sorry Healthyme, are you just asking for help finding a therapist with some benzo experience?

You can put in google Dr's in (where I live) that have benzo withdrawal experience, hopefully you live in an area that will have some names pop up.    You can also go to Withdrawal Support thread and ask, more people will see your question there.    If you are looking for more help of some kind, please let us know.  Mary 💜

[[Ul...]]

I’m older now. I used to be youthful.

Due to all the stressors I have not

decided to taper yet. But I feel

lousy and scared every time I take

the cloz. Any supports provided I would

appreciate. I’ve scared for my mental health.

My life partner is a big support. I have

lost friends bc they don’t understand

what is happening to me.

I need a therapist who understands

what benzos do. Thanks .

 

If you find one, let me know!! I did some research in my area and it's tough. I talked to two last week and neither had a clue about benzos. In fact, one suggested that I stay ON them! Idiot.

 

Take care,

 

Jeff

[[Fi...]]

Healthyme123 and Ultra2007,

 

I work with a benzo coach though a service called Lucid Lane. 

They provide support for people going through benzo withdrawal and I have found it helpful.  www.lucidlane.com

 

My coach provides me emotional support during my benzo wirhdrawal. It is not an in person service so I speak to her on the phone.  They do accept some insurance and the coaches are trained in benzo withdrawal.  There is no long term contract or commitment.  You can always call to get information and see if they are a fit for you.  I will say, my coach does not tell me how to taper. 

 

As you have discovered, most therapists do not know about benzo withdrawal and it can be frustrating. 

 

By the way, I don't receive anything for recommending Lucid Lane. I just provide the information because it has been helpful for me. 

 

Final Healing