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kevinmd.com: "Michael Jackson dead from propofol..." -- Role of Dr. C. Murray.


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  • 2 years later...
You betcha! I'm still here -- for better or worse. Actually, this article stayed with me. I remember being aghast at how much medication Dr. Murray administered over a few short hours. Really astounding! The fact that Michael Jackson "was given enough benzodiazepines to put down a large animal" is quite horrific.
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Yes, it is shocking how reckless Dr Murray was. Such high doses of benzos and then -- propofol AT HOME?! I also find it hard to believe his narrative that MJ administered the second dose of propofol himself.


The reason why this article stood out to me is because a year ago I was so unbelievably sick from withdrawal, I could not sleep, I kept losing weight, pain, vomiting, dizziness, tachycardia,  all the brain and mental symptoms, akathisia, you name it. I had to wait for an endoscopy to check my stomach and it was absolute torture. I took seroquel 2 nights before my endoscopy, only felt worse, no sleep. ER next day. They prescribed me some odd benzos, but I finally broke down and took .25 mg of Ativan and slept for a couple of hours (that low of a dose wouldn't induce sleep, but I was sleep deprived and Ativan took the edge off my symptoms). Then comes the next morning. I was in agony from all the symptoms, especially because I was fasting.


My friend takes me to the hospital and they tell me I will be given Propofol instead of Versed. I thought, okay, I guess I'll get a 10 minute break from this torture. When I woke up I felt... normal. It only lasted 2 hours but those were probably the best 2 hours since the whole withdrawal started. I said to my friend: "I wish I could have propofol every day. It seems like propofol is the only thing that can alleviate benzo withdrawal."


And Michael Jackson did have propofol every day. They labeled him an addict, but I'm just thinking: if he was in agony like I was and still had to do rehearsals every day and keep everything together, be in public every day, propofol was probably the only thing that kept him going. He was in an extreme benzo withdrawal while being pushed to the limits of what even a healthy person can handle. It's a horrible way to live. He probably needed time, benzo-wise care (taper) and 0 publicity.

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That's a pretty intense story, ideal! Wow! I'm glad you got through that procedure, but it sounds like a really rough experience. As far as MJ goes, his life was obviously extremely complicated. But there's no way to condone what Dr. Murray did. He should have done the right thing. He could have played a role in getting MJ the help he needed, but he did the opposite.
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