quit work due to anxiety or depression

[[Ro...]]

Although, sometimes I think even a part time job would be good to keep my mind off some things .....

 

I filled out a job application Monday for part time work at the Casey's gas station across the street from my house. I'm thinking about filling one out at the Dollar General that will be opening soon in the next town from me. It's only about a 10-15 minute drive depending on the weather.

[[no...]]

I have been working as a children's program librarian and going to school to finish my BFa in studio art while quitting and w/ding from cymbalta in March and now klonopin, which i am two weeks off. I do not have an option of not working.  I have been going to college for 6 years now and am almost finished. For me, these things are what motivates me to keep going.  I just can't see myself staying at home and isolating myself from life.  When I had a previous bout with severe anxiety a few years back, i did just that, and it just made things worse. i got to where I didnt want to go anywhere without my husband, then I didnt want him to leave for work. Finally things got financially bad enough that i was forced to get a crappy job. I thought there was no way that I could do it, the panic was so great each day was like this one long panic attack.  But what happened was i began to meet people, talk to customers, make money.  That job led to another better one, and from there, school seemed like something to try. Each day I was sure that I wouldn't make it, but not only did i make it, but I began to travel long distances in the car alone, put my art in galleries...all things I would never have thought I would do.  Now at 2 wks off klonopin, my anxiety is way up there again, and there are times when i go all irrational and think the old " theres no way I can go to work, to the store".  But so far I have. I have worked so damn hard to pull myself out of a dark hole, and I refuse to let things slide back. What helps is telling myself that this is temporary, just anxiety from getting off meds, not my permanent state. I am using every tool i ever learned to work through this.

[[De...]]

I posted a question similar to this. I wasnt on benzos more than a month and a half, but I too suffered a great deal working full time.  My husband does real estate and his business has suffered...so I'm the bread winner and we have a mortgage to pay.  I couldn't quit my job.  I came close to taking a leave of absence...and sometimes I think I should, but I really didn't want to take that route.  I don't have the crazy stress and anxiety in my life right now, so I'm just trying to stick through my healing process.  I'm an accountant, so we are either super busy or slow.  It sucks getting zero sleep and having to go to work and to a 12 hour day. I've used almost all my PTO. 

 

I had to tell my boss about the benzos and let her know I wad going thru a w/d process of no sleep.  I hard to tell her my story bc she knew this all started bc it was started by work stress and it amounted to this. 

 

I don't know how people go thru this with kids.

 

Take care all.

[[Da...]]

I am coming off benzos. And I can't see myself working at all. I don't know how anyone coming off could. Am I wimp or are my sx really bad. I feel like loser sometimes. All I do is lay and watch tv. I am a mess and I still have a ways to go. Man o man.

 

Danny

[[Pi...]]

I can't work at all. And I am lucky enough to get disability (in the UK). There's no way I could work through this. The panic and anxiety is immense. I am so anxious just leaving the house, although I try to do this everyday. Financially I am broke but there is simply nothing I can do about that. 6 months off now and no let up in the anxiety. I too am a mess.

[[ha...]]

i'm glad to see some information about this.  i just quit school to address my med/drug abuse problems.  i thought, i'm in school and i feel smart so why am i doing this stupid thing.  i used 3mg alpraz daily and 30 to 40 mg hydrocodone 3 x's a week.  this has all been accumulated over the last 4 years. 

 

at first it was so i could work and function through a normal day.  then it became dependency and then real depression.  my life was worse than when i first started. 

 

quitting school was a hard decision.  i don't have a job to go to so i can get out of the house but i know that before i get a job or go back to school i have to be drug free.  i am just wasting my time otherwise, no matter what i do.  that's the long and the short of it. 

 

in this economy i don't envy anyone going thru this.  in this respect i have to say that i am lucky.  i can make things work for a couple of years before i would have to get a job.  that isn't my plan.  i plan on a 4 to 6 month w/d (i am on day #4 of a cold turkey w/d of the above).  whatever plan i come up with during this time whether back to school or straight to work at least i feel that i will follow it thru.  i wasn't thinking clearly on meds anymore......even tho it's only day #4 i feel my head getting clearer today.  it is the first day that i have felt it.  it lasted only about 45 minutes this morning but it's a start....

[[...]]

this was an interesting thread for me because i am a teacher off for the summer and nervous about facing my job mid aug. i'ts teaching high school. city kids.  i am thankful that i will have 2 months to heal (l more) but am wondering how the people who were early on in this post are doiing - better i hope.  this has been really tough for me.  the hardest part is the weirdness - i could not be working very well right now i am afraid.  i know survival instincts can kick in tho.  this is a big fear for me because it is just me and i do not want to lose my home.  thanks everyone.

[[Ho...]]

I have never really been able to hold down a job for long because I've been struggling with ADs (and recently Klonopin) for so incredibly long. I want so bad to become stable and live a normal, healthy life. I was fired once because of my sleep problems and couldn't make it to work in time. But I've had about 4 jobs since then, and 2 I've ended up quitting. I think, like panther said, there's something about "survival instincts" kicking in that just tells me I need to quit and lock myself up in my house and become endlessly anxious in an attempt to analyze my "problem."

 

The others job were only summer jobs, and it was absolutely torture, but I made it through the summers.

 

 

I don't know what to do in order to hold employment and be happy and healthy.  

[[...]]

Holly you and i are off about the same time.  it helps to think we can just take care of ourselves right now.  the days have been long for me.  i can see improvement tho.  thanks so much for your reply

[[br...]]

I went on medical leave (short term disability) for three months because I couldn't function anymore. Wanna guess what got me back on my feet and back to work? Oh the irony.

[[Ho...]]

I went on medical leave (short term disability) for three months because I couldn't function anymore. Wanna guess what got me back on my feet and back to work? Oh the irony.

 

Anxiety?

[[nc...]]

Kim:

 

Before I had to quit my job because of benzos I was a legal secretary.  I worked on about six social security disability cases.  The reality is that 95% of people that apply for SSD get denied the first time. You can appeal. The second time you apply approximately 75% get denied. You then get a letter from SSD telling you that you can appeal and this time you will have a hearing and a judge will make a determination by reviewing all the medical records that have been submitted whether you qualify to receive it. The judge will also question you. You need to hire a lawyer that specializes in SSD. There shouldl be no cost to you unless you win the case. Often you will receive SSD retroactively from the first time you apply. Lawyers usually charge approixmately 25% if you win the case.  Things to know if you have a good attorney:

 

1. Doctors and any other medical providers are not supposed to charge for the cost of providing your attorney your medical records in a SSD case.  When I was ordering medical records I would remind the staff that was the law. You will know you have a good attorney if he/she does that. Some attorneys ask you to request your own medical records.

 

2. The whole process takes at least a year if it goes to hearing. There are time constraints on when you have to file certain forms once you apply.  It will do you no good to call the attorney to see if you have received a hearing date yet. Everyone that applies for SSD is usually in the same boat - they need money. Calling the Social Security office will not speed up your case. Make sure that your attorney is submitting the forms needed to help you win the case on a timely basis. You will receive forms (and so will your attorney) from SSD if your first application has been denied. This does not mean you have lost.  As I said you can appeal it and apply again.

 

3. I should have told you this one first. Your attorney will help determine whether he/she thinks you even have a chance of winning.  That doesn't mean you should not try another attorney.  Generally an attorney does not charge a consultation fee for a SSD case. Ask that question when you first call the attorney. If there is a fee look for another attorney.

 

4. Last, you can go online to the Social Security Administration website and the process will be explained to you and you can look at the application form.  You do not have to have an attorney to file for SSD.  I advise it though. You will have a better chance of winning.

 

If you have any other questions please post to my thread.

 

Good luck if you go forward. I hope you win.

 

Nancy  

[[Ma...]]

I quit my job after just one month  . Actually that wasn't some serious job but brings me money. Now my husband had to work sometimes overtime. That was good job but physically hard. I was working there several times and every time quit cause of anxiety. But last time was the worst. I just couldn't work there with w/d. Not just anxiety and panic, also very tired and feel so much pain. I was blaming myself for not working and feel guilty but now when I wake up in pain I know I can't. It will bring just more stress what I don't need right now.

I hope after all this benzo's thing I will start working. I don't want to isolate myself from people and just sit at home. But now I really can't.

 

Marija

[[Ho...]]

Last night I stayed home because of my anxiety and never felt very good even though I stayed home.  Tonight I went to work and felt much better.  Sometimes work is ok and sometimes it's not--depends on the situation.

[[Ho...]]

I can tell you one thing, though.  Work is not the be all and end all of my life anymore.  My health comes first.

[[Ho...]]

Last night I stayed home because of my anxiety and never felt very good even though I stayed home.  Tonight I went to work and felt much better.  Sometimes work is ok and sometimes it's not--depends on the situation.

I know exactly how that feels. I lock myself up in the house when I feel like crap, because that's always made me feel better before. But now in wd, it seems to only make me worse! 

[Guest [Si...]]

I would love to work again and go to school, but I'm not able and on SSI right now.

 

I miss it.

 

I don't have a fear of ppl but I do going out sometimes.

[[Ju...]]

I may have had to quit my job, if it weren't for the fact that it's not very challenging, I have a lot of freedom, and don't have to deal with a lot of other people.  I'm an executive assistant, and my boss is gone or in meetings a lot of the time.

 

When I'm really feeling bad, I reserve one of our smaller meeting rooms, lock the door, and lay on the floor in the corner, if even for just a few minutes. I then get up, fix up my hair, wipe the potentially smudged makeup, and get back to my desk.  My co workers and boss have no idea.  I don't know what i would have done if I weren't able to do this. 

 

I managed to get "exceeds expectations" on a recent review. I take advantage of the "windows" days and get most of my work done then. I'm still amazed.  Exhausted at keeping this up though.

[[Ho...]]

I may have had to quit my job, if it weren't for the fact that it's not very challenging, I have a lot of freedom, and don't have to deal with a lot of other people.  I'm an executive assistant, and my boss is gone or in meetings a lot of the time.

 

When I'm really feeling bad, I reserve one of our smaller meeting rooms, lock the door, and lay on the floor in the corner, if even for just a few minutes. I then get up, fix up my hair, wipe the potentially smudged makeup, and get back to my desk.  My co workers and boss have no idea.  I don't know what i would have done if I weren't able to do this. 

 

I managed to get "exceeds expectations" on a recent review. I take advantage of the "windows" days and get most of my work done then. I'm still amazed.  Exhausted at keeping this up though.

 

I know what you mean and I am like you too--don't have a very challenging job (my other seasonal job is, though) and there is only four of us in the office anyway--two in mine and two in the other and we are all pretty good friends and have a laugh and talk so all is good.