Short term benzo users

[[In...]]

So glad to see you, Siggy, Meggie Mae, Sniogra & Corsair 12 again on this thread.... Sorry you are "back in the trenches," Siggy....I was hoping since I hadn't heard from you in a while it was better....

And I still remain grateful for yawns, MeggieMae....so, so true! Glad you are improving....

 

After sleep being my hugest issue for months, after I improved at about month 5-6, I still have weird, weird vivid dreams, now that I do sleep again...and no longer waking at "2:30 like clockwork" but still do wake up after 3-6 hours, but now usually can go back to sleep....

 

I think being able to travel to the beach for 2 separate weeks, and the mountains for 2 separate weeks, really helped me break up my routine, obsess less, and distract more with packing, unpacking, arranging pet sitters, and doing out of the usual activities...so that even if I was in a bad wave with tinnitus or hyperacuisis or irritability or GI issues or whatever the symptom, it didn't bother me as bad as it does at home...

 

The quiet of the mountains, and doing gentle hikes in pungent fir forest hummus on mossy rocks, in cooler temperatures (60s-70s), has been the best help of all....way more than any diet or exercise attempts for me...

 

but, now I am home again, who knows what will happen....I remain in a "one night on, one night off" pattern with sleep, Siggy, but not the "zero nights" on the off nights....just very fitful sleep, not restful and ridiculously vivid dreams...hope you aren't having as bad "off nights" lately....

 

Hope your bad wave improves soon, Corsair12....

 

It does remain unbelievable how long we short term users can suffer. It seems common among us that we were on such a short time, a taper would have exceeded the time we were initially on the drug, if we even had known about a taper. But for use under 3 months, cold turkey seems to happen more often (from what I've read on these boards) due to lack of guidance from health professionals, and the belief that it shouldn't be a problem to cold turkey.  Now, I am less and less sure about having cold turkey'ed, and unsure if a longer taper would have prevented any of these longer term problems or not... I'll never know....but I can always hope that the people doing long tapers on these boards are having an easier time....

 

goodnight, and wishes for good sleep to everyone on this thread.....

 

 

[[Si...]]

Hi Independence, thanks for thinking about me. I haven't had a fully sleepless night I think in about 2-1/2 weeks. The last one I had was the kick off to a new wave that has slightly lifted in the last two days. My sleep still has been somewhat up and down, but most nights now getting 4 – 6. Have a had a few where I got 2-3. Some nights I do get a lot of wake ups and others barely any. I think it's just a continuing of the up and down pattern (just less up and down) that happens with this stuff. Eventually I think it will normalize more. It's what happened to me the first time I thought I was healed (before binge drinking and getting the flu). Sorry you're still up and down as well.

[[In...]]

Thanks, Siggy, for the news...at least it doesn't sound nearly as bad as those horrible waves before.....

Everything is usually better in summers for me..... I really, really hate winter, and hate, hate being cold.  I imagine I would have way fewer health problems if I lived in a warm-all-the-time place...but who knows...

 

I also have no trouble bawling my eyes out anymore, listening to Allison Krauss both driving through the mountains an on this amazing concert in Louisville....

 

 

 

 

[[Bb...]]

So those who took a slower pace with their cuts, how long post jump before you were healed? I'm getting lower, but struggling. A part of me feels I'll need to take it very slow from here on out, but another part of me thinks I need to bite the bullet and be done with this drug/poison. All thoughts appreciated!

[[Co...]]

So those who took a slower pace with their cuts, how long post jump before you were healed? I'm getting lower, but struggling. A part of me feels I'll need to take it very slow from here on out, but another part of me thinks I need to bite the bullet and be done with this drug/poison. All thoughts appreciated!

 

I'm getting virusses every few months, and I found out that jumping while sick was the best thing for me. Because there was no difference in symptoms because the virus is so overwhelming. But I can understand not everyone gets virusses all the time. It's just a personal thought

[[bl...]]

Count me in!

It's almost unbelievable the anguish that a small pill can cause.

 

We will all come out of this stronger! <3

[[me...]]

blessed41,  what benzo were you on and for how long?

[[bl...]]

blessed41,  what benzo were you on and for how long?

 

Xanax 3-6 months had only taken it occasionally.

[[me...]]

blessed, I was on Xanax just under 3 months for sleep.  I took either .25 or .5 at night.  After being on it 7 weeks, I was hit with unexplainable debilitating anxiety, had no idea what was causing it.  When did you start feeling symptoms from the Xanax?

[[bl...]]

blessed, I was on Xanax just under 3 months for sleep.  I took either .25 or .5 at night.  After being on it 7 weeks, I was hit with unexplainable debilitating anxiety, had no idea what was causing it.  When did you start feeling symptoms from the Xanax?

 

Just one day out of the blue, I began to have withdrawal symptoms and I up dosed and did a 12 day taper. Six days after I finished my taper, withdrawal symptoms literally set me on my backside. The first few weeks were literally unexplainable. I am thankful that I do have a good many "window" days.

 

How are you doing? <3

[[me...]]

Well, I did a c/t withdrawal and had just about every terrible symptom.  Looking back, I very well could have had a heart attack.  I am at almost 6 months out now, and I am much better, but not 100% yet.  The Xanax also caused terrible hormonal disruption.  I am  44 and was no where near menopause.  On Xanax my estrogen plummeted to that of a post menopausal woman, my progesterone dropped, and my testosterone climbed.  My hormones are just now starting to balance out.  I still wake up often at night, sometimes with a cortisol surge.  I have anxiety that comes and goes, and still get that feeling you get when dropping down a hill or roller coaster, that terrible feeling in your stomach.  I used to have that happen to me 30 times a day, just being at home.  Now it happens maybe 3 times  a day.  I have neuropathy that comes and goes.  Can't wait until I am 100% healed, then I will write my success story.

[[bl...]]

Well, I did a c/t withdrawal and had just about every terrible symptom.  Looking back, I very well could have had a heart attack.  I am at almost 6 months out now, and I am much better, but not 100% yet.  The Xanax also caused terrible hormonal disruption.  I am  44 and was no where near menopause.  On Xanax my estrogen plummeted to that of a post menopausal woman, my progesterone dropped, and my testosterone climbed.  My hormones are just now starting to balance out.  I still wake up often at night, sometimes with a cortisol surge.  I have anxiety that comes and goes, and still get that feeling you get when dropping down a hill or roller coaster, that terrible feeling in your stomach.  I used to have that happen to me 30 times a day, just being at home.  Now it happens maybe 3 times  a day.  I have neuropathy that comes and goes.  Can't wait until I am 100% healed, then I will write my success story.

 

It is definitely an uncomfortable ride for sure!

Together we will all get through this and every day, is another day closer to complete healing! <3

[[...]]

Maggiemay,

I am glad you are doing great and is ready to write your success story.  I am 6 weeks off.  I had to do a semi-slow taper so I can continue working. 

[[...]]

Blessed,

did you c/t of Xanax?

[[bl...]]

Blessed,

did you c/t of Xanax?

 

I did a 12 day taper by cutting my dose.

[[me...]]

Vika,

 

I am not 100% healed yet.  Still have some lingering symptoms.  But I will write my success story when I am 100% healed.

[[...]]

Vika,

 

I am not 100% healed yet.  Still have some lingering symptoms.  But I will write my success story when I am 100% healed.

 

I hope it happens soon for you.

[[ar...]]

I'm a short time user stuck in a long taper.  Cross to Valium, rapid taper to 3mg and had to really slow down at the end here. 

 

If I knew my symptoms were from the Xanax, I would have tapered it fast for short time use.  I went to doctors for help and they made it worse.  Kindled me.  I am way better compared to the beginning but if I could go back in time, I would have avoided the doctors.

[[le...]]

My 7th month off, after 50 days use of prazepam. I still have tightness in the chest (seems like someone is pressing on my muscle), burning (like fire) on my back and chest, my legs are paining. Vision is distorted (eyes muscle pain), front-head seems sometimes dizzy. Yeah, this started to happen after quitting prazepam. However, I am still taking Cipralex, and I am not sure if this med is the problem or the withdrawal. 

[[Co...]]

How is everyone?

I'm not doing too great. six months off going on 7 months and struggling. Have a lot of sx and no windows.

Really scared I will not heal.

[[Sh...]]

Corsair - I know you're going through a rough time, but you WILL heal, with time and patience. It's been 9 months today that I've been benzo-free and just starting to get some windows that last a few days, still interspersed with very tough windows. We'll get there! Whatever you can do to distract from the symptoms and fears should help make the time pass more tolerably.

[[Pe...]]

Hi All;

I'm jumping in as I only used/abused for 3.5 weeks. After a benzo-bender with alcohol abuse, I stopped drinking and rapid taper going from 60 1mg L over 4 DAYS, to 2mg for a week, 1 mg for a week, then quit.  So glad I found this site, all of the support and ppls stories.  It's so nice to have a place where ppl understand.    Even my ex, who is a substance abuse counselor did not know the s/x of benzos and told me to quit c/t. I may have listened to her if not for this site and reading on wikipedia about w/d.  Thankfully I said 'no f#$%ing way!! and at least tapered a little.

I'm now 10 days benzo clean and suffering mild s/x. I realize when I tapered so fast I was in w/d and after quitting my acute was a nightmare.  Came very close to reinstating and doing a slower taper but so glad I didn't as I had a nice window the next day.  I know now I'm in a wave, but tolerable.  Some head fog, no appetite/hungry feelings, and mild anxiety and depression.  (Speaking of, I'm still on 40mg paxil and 20mg omeprazole.  Plan to get off those as well!!)

I have to say that I can't believe dr will prescribe these for such long use, ignorant of long-term dependence and w/d.  My anxiety/depression was no where NEAR the levels like it was when coming off benzos.  And what these drugs do to your brain is criminal!!!

Godspeed to all you who are suffering badly.  I can only echo what others have said, time is the big healing factor.  Stay the course, get off this crap, and you will feel better!

 

[[si...]]

I'm jumping in too.  I used benzos for close to 3 months.  I did not use daily.  What I'm finding out though, during that time I probably always had benzos in my system due to using klonopin.  I feel like crap today.  I honestly didn't think it would be this bad.  I feel like I can't breath.  It sucks.  When  will this begin to pass???  I'm actually pretty scared about everything right now.  I wonder if I should've done more of a taper.  It's been 10 days, so there's no sense going back now.  Ok... get a grip and relax!!

 

Is everyone on here still working?  It's been pure hell trying to get through my days.  I can't even focus on my job.  All I can think about is getting to 3pm so I can leave.

[[Pe...]]

Sierra - I'm still working.  Those days on my taper and acute w/d were hell, but I made it through.  As you know I turned a corner and feel much better, but cog fog is still there, making work difficult.  That and my memory is horrible but getting better.  I used to look forward to work, and was getting ready to go back to school and/or start looking for a new position in the company.  To even think of those things a couple weeks ago terrified me!  Now I can at least think about it without sending me into a depression spiral.

You'll get better.  Take it hour by hour, minute by minute, and distract yourself from thinking about 'yourself' whenever you can.

[[si...]]

My biggest problem is this breathing.  It makes me feel like I'm going to die.  Yes, I have other issues going on, but I think I could at least function with them. 

 

As crazy as this sounds, I'm trying to be grateful for this experience(as much as I hate it).  There is a lot of growth going on for sure.