CALLING ALL HOPEFUL PEOPLE <3

[[Ca...]]

Caren... are you sure they’re called “foreskin energy drinks”?!     

That doesn’t sound quite right! Hahaha

 

Uhm.... It's fresubin  :laugh: Now even the Spell Check button starts to join us.....

 

Well, I'm in a hurry. Off to work. Slept in. 

[[So...]]

Happy Valentine's Day to EVERYONE!

 

Wishing a big window to all of you. After 2.5 days of roughness, I had a window yesterday afternoon and feel better today...let's manifest these windows so we all have them!

 

[[4G...]]

Tweed,  Just  go over to the Support Groups thread. At the top it will give you the choice to start a new group. Then do exactly what you did on the Withdrawal Thread, i.e. give it a title and then a quick explanation of what the new group is about.

 

Last thing, I think it would be a good idea to write something on the original thread to say you've started it up on Support Groups.

 

OR (this is easier) ask a moderator to move the thread. Then you would keep everything that's already on it. That's a much better idea actually. I could try it you want. Seeing as you've said that's what you want, then I will try to do it.

 

 

[[4G...]]

I've told the moderators, Tweed, so hopefully they will move it without you having to do anything.

Gxxx

[[Ca...]]

Happy Valentine's Day to EVERYONE!

 

Wishing a big window to all of you. After 2.5 days of roughness, I had a window yesterday afternoon and feel better today...let's manifest these windows so we all have them!

 

 

That's great, Soberhope! Or is it Pete? Wanna share my window with all of you!

 

[[Ca...]]

And now for something completely different.....

 

Don't want to make you all jealous, but we just finished the details of our trip to Australia this summer! Our son turns 18 in June, the perfect excuse for a decadent vacation  .

 

I'm afraid of flying, so that's also going to be a lot fun too . Well, it gives me the opportunity to work on my fear of flying. Normally we fly once a year. And now we are going to fly 6 times in one month (3 of them are domestic flights). But I'm not going to worry about it until I'm on that plane. I'll see what happens then.

 

Last summer we flew to France. A two hour flight. I calculated that I would have 4 panic attacks during the flight (every half hour one attack). So the first attack came along and I thought: 'Okay, this is the first one. Let's get it over and done with.' And the attack disappeared immediately. Had no more attacks during that flight and none on the flight home. I'm still amazed by what a difference it makes once you can accept your panic attack.

 

 

[[4G...]]

Tweed, Still no word from the moderators. Perhaps you could ask them? Hope you're okay. Gxxx

P.S. I'm in the UK too.

[[So...]]

Caren

 

You can call me Pete (handles sometimes get confusing to me so I included my real name in my signature).

 

Australia sounds amazing! I went a few years ago and LOVED it. I surf so it was truly paradise for me. It's a long plane ride but I slept a lot of it. Where in Australia are you going?

 

I hope we can move this thread to the support groups too!

 

Hope everyone is having a great day. Yesterday and today have been pretty good for me!

[[Ca...]]

I understand the confusion, Pete. Caren is my middle name. When I visited friends in America a long time ago, they called me Caren cause they had a hard time pronouncing my real name. It ends with a hard g, so my name ended always with ugh. 

 

We're going to Sydney, Tasmania, Brisbane and Cairns. We do a stop over in Singapore. Wanted to see a lot more, but didn't want to stay at each place for just a day. So we had to choose. Not easy, cause Australia is a big county and there are so many wonderfull things to see! But everyone in our family (of four) had to finish the sentence: If I go to Australia I absolutely want..... '. My daughter actually said: I want to hug koala's. And we wanted a combination of nature, culture and cities. I'm thrilled we are actually going.

 

Where did you go? If you're a surfer I guess you visited the Gold coast?

 

Tweed, how are you feeling today. Tired of your adventure from yesterday, but proud that you did it?

 

Chinchuck, how was the visit from the CBT-lady?

 

And 4Gillyblossom6, thanks for your help. Happy to hear the positive stuff is making other people feeling positive. And please, share your own positivity if you want to.

 

 

[[So...]]

Hi Everyone! Hope everyone is feeling good today!

 

Hi Gilly and Chin and Tweed

 

Caren:

I went to Sydney, Melbourne, the Gold Coast (surfing!) and Mosman or the rain forest. Sydney is AMAZING. You can go from a restaurant in the city then hop on a ferry and be at the beach. Australians are all so nice too. And I did get to hug a koala bear too and see a kangaroo to boot.

 

I went to Singapore a long time ago as a child (I am 44 now!) so only remember bits and pieces. You will have an amazing trip.

 

I am searching for a good movie to watch. Having pasta with meatballs for dinner and of course I second guess everything i eat and think: is this OK? I hope it is...

[[So...]]

Hi Tweed -

 

I can relate. I switched to liquid yesterday and it hit me last night when I woke up at 2:30am and haven't been able to sleep and now can't function either - massive body panic and feel so off. I am going to now taper using pills and liquid 2mg in pills and cut the 1mg in liquid. Has anyone else had problems with this switch? I had 2 good days and now this. I wish I was there so we could help each other.

 

I hope it gets better as the day goes on because it has been awful for a few hours.Feeling so worn down by this whole process.

 

Really hope everyone else is doing better. I know I am healing but at 2.99mg today it is hard (down from 3mg yesterday).

 

Sending everyone love.

[[So...]]

Tweed: I am functional and slowly starting to feel a little better but I did take my morning dose.

 

I wonder if it is the liquid? It feels like when I dose with liquid it has no effect. I am going to do a liquid/pill combo now for a little and see if I adjust.

 

Severe s/x this morning but letting up. I think the same thing: how much longer can I do this? But I know it will end and I will heal. We will all heal. We must keep that hope alive and with us everyday.

 

Are you starting to feel better at all?

[[So...]]

I hope I can tolerate the liquid and one day was just a bump...I am reducing 5% from the previous dose every 15 days. I was going to go all liquid but now will taper the 1mg liquid and keep the 2mg in pill form and hopefully that will be smoother.

 

Let us know what Baylissa says please.

 

I can kind of work (from home) but far from feeling myself and still anxiety is on my back (and whole body). This morning from 2:30am was rough. And yesterday was so much better...so hard to figure out.

 

I wonder if the liquid is metabolizing too fast or not enough? I make the solution with the same pills so hard to figure out why it would be so different.

 

We must keep hope alive though. I think our brains are recovering and resetting when we are in a wave - thinking that helps me push on...when all I want to do is give up. How many times I have looked back and thought: I was so much better when I took 10mg of Valium every night for sleep...I never reached tolerance...but I know I am doing the right thing.

 

Hope you are feeling better Tweed - sending you the biggest window possible.

[[4G...]]

Hi guys. I'm also having a bed day. Gosh, we're all feeling rough at once!

 

Glad that the moderators have moved this thread. I've thanked Megan for doing it.

 

Hope for all today.  Gxxx

[[ch...]]

Well everyone, another day in the land of benzo. Yesterday was not a good day, but then I had made a cut a couple of days before and I seem to be the worse for wear after 2 or 3 days. Of course I did not help matters by deciding I was going to eat whatever I wanted, so at midnight I had tucked into potato crisps and 4 digestive biscuits  plus a cup of tea. I paid the price of course, therefore when the CBT lady arrived I had a double whammy going on, and feeling ill extremely anxious and faint.

I said I was unwell due to the cut I had made, but it seems I was not allowed to mention valium or tapers or the effect it had on me. Then she asked had I kept my mood diary. Well I read her some of it, and my scores of mostly 8's and 9's. 10 being the worst, and she said, I had better stop keeping the diary she had asked for. She then pulled out a form with boxes to tick, regarding health anxiety. It seems that is the route of my problems. NOT.  I said I was fine until the dreaded drug, and that yes I am anxious about my health now. She of course dismissed that and said, the numbers indicate that your problem is definitely health anxiety. I said  I am sure I have it now, but that is because of the drug I am withdrawing off. She then said she did not think she would be able to help me as I did not accept this, oh and I should take days off the computer if I want to get better. I said , I don't think so. She is back in 2 weeks, but not if I can help it. Another one bites the dust.

One day I will be better, as we all will, and that is all that matters in the end. 

 

 

[[Ca...]]

Hello all!  I'm glad to join you guys, I too- am a positive, hopeful person.  I'd love to share this video with you guys- Tara Brach is an incredible human being and her teachings have helped me.  Anything we can do to gladden the mind, is beneficial and part of the healing process.  The brain has an innate ability to heal itself, and we can usher that healing along with mindfulness.  Sending love to you all <3

 

[[ch...]]

Hi  Candice. Good to see you here. I don't know where the others are, but being hopeful is surely the way forward. I have been applying the idea all day, and do you know, it's been one of the best I've had in ages.

Every time a negative thought entered my head I countered it with . I am 100% sure I am going to be well and live my life the way it should be. If the anxiety really crept up, I did my version of the incredible hulk. Don't know why it should help but it does. Could be stimulating the vagus nerve, or then again, it's a change from being passive and letting the Valium dictate to me.

I will definitely click on the link. Thank you for the suggestion.

Here's to the  power of positive thinking.

[[mo...]]

I’m optimistic and hopeful, actually. Think I’ll follow.

[[Ca...]]

Hi  Candice. Good to see you here. I don't know where the others are, but being hopeful is surely the way forward. I have been applying the idea all day, and do you know, it's been one of the best I've had in ages.

Every time a negative thought entered my head I countered it with . I am 100% sure I am going to be well and live my life the way it should be. If the anxiety really crept up, I did my version of the incredible hulk. Don't know why it should help but it does. Could be stimulating the vagus nerve, or then again, it's a change from being passive and letting the Valium dictate to me.

I will definitely click on the link. Thank you for the suggestion.

Here's to the  power of positive thinking.

 

Hey chinchuck!  That is excellent!  What we are learning and practicing in gladdening the mind, is going to serve us so well, long after the healing is done from withdrawal.   

[[Gy...]]

Hello fellow positive people

Great thread you have here, I have been apart of BB since 2013 I had a bit of a break for a couple of years as it can get a bit heavy, but on the lighter side I have seen many recover and finally move on which when checking out those who I used to converse and they are no longer her it makes my heart sing and gives me so much hope.

I had a break from this forum and was on another using my knowledge learnt here about tapering and micro tapering to help others as well as myself to get off amitriptyline, there are not a lot of people on that drug as it is such an oldy in he pharma world and not many had the knowledge of making a tablet into a liquid.

Lately I have been listening to and tapping along with Brad Yates which really helps, he has a tapping session for just about everything and also takes his time so you can follow easily and effortlessly.

This is a great idea because positivity helps so much, whenever I say something negative I tell myself to flip that mindset.

 

Luv n hugs

Gypsy

[[Ca...]]

Goodmorning to you all,

woke up late this morning. Insomnia is something I haven't had for a very long time, more the opposite.

 

Mon pilot, Candice and Gypsy, welcome. Don't know Tara Brach and Brad Yates, but I'm going to find out about them.

 

Gilly, Tweed and Peter, hope you're feeling better today.

 

Tweed, what are internal akathisia and SI? And how does a glutamate storm feel?

 

Wow Caren! That sounds amazing! I am unfortunately not functional during my taper so couldn't even imagine going on holiday like that. It's so strange how the drug seems to do so much more damage in some people than others?! We all heal though...

 

Well, I haven't always been functional. That period lasted about 9 months. After 6 months I was so sick and tired of it (didn't leave my house anymore because I thought I couldn't do it), I decided to get functional again. I started to work on my anxiety, cause anxiety worsens my withdrawal symptoms. I learned not to worry about the future because I can't predict the future. And I decided the benzo's and the withdrawal would no longer dictate my life. It wasn't easy, but it paid off. And now I'm functional. Not at the level of before I started tapering, still have withdrawal symptoms almost every day, but most of them don't bother me anymore. This didn't happen overnight and I didn't do it on my own, my NLP coach helped me a lot. Especially with being positive and acceptance.

And please know, I'm not judging you for not being functional. Cause I don't know how bad your symptoms are. But I found a way to get functional, eventhough I thought that wasn't possible.

 

Hi  Candice. Good to see you here. I don't know where the others are, but being hopeful is surely the way forward. I have been applying the idea all day, and do you know, it's been one of the best I've had in ages.

Every time a negative thought entered my head I countered it with . I am 100% sure I am going to be well and live my life the way it should be. If the anxiety really crept up, I did my version of the incredible hulk. Don't know why it should help but it does. Could be stimulating the vagus nerve, or then again, it's a change from being passive and letting the Valium dictate to me.

I will definitely click on the link. Thank you for the suggestion.

Here's to the  power of positive thinking.

 

Chinchuck, had the same experience with my own CBT-lady. She didn't understand me at all.

Good to hear you are replacing negative thoughts with positive thoughts. I do that too, I also do it with negative images that pop up in my mind. Just change the image like I'm switching channels on TV. And your inner hulk is my silent scream. It somehow gives me energy and it's a way to change my mindset from 'I don't know' to 'I can do it".  I keep it a silent scream not to scare the people around  me  .

 

Did one of you ever try to say your fears with a funny of silly voice? You can use a sexy voice of Donald Duck. The idea is that if you say what you're afraid of with a silly voice, your fear isn't so scary anymore.  And after a fall back, my anxiety revs up and I some of my old fears come back. Yesterday I had a meeting outside of my office. I knew I had to walk up high stairways. In the past that was a big problem, especially when they are open stairways. It's no problem anymore (still don't like open stairs, never have), but while I was on my way to the meeting, I got nervous. Didn't understand why. Then realised I had to take those stairs. I said to myself with my Donald Trump-voice: 'That are very very dangerous stairs. They are so dangerous, you should take the elevator.' And poof, wasn't nervous anymore and took the stairs with n problem at all. Sorry for all the Trump followers who can't appreciate Trump-jokes, but it really helped 

 

Well, it weekend so that means doing groceries, clean up the house and tonight I'm having diner with my husband and my brother and sister in law. Yesterday I worked all day and went to the theatre, so tomorrow I'm going to do noting.

 

Hope you all have a nice weekend,

Caren

[[Ma...]]

By functional, do you mean you’re able to work etc?

 

Yes I believe the liquid hits differently or metabolises differently. I felt totally different on the liquid (not in a good way). Not that I feel good on the pills either! It’s all poison to me!

 

We will heal.

Therefore we must hold on...

 

I’m speaking to Baylissa today which will help motivate me.

 

I’m feeling better than I was during the night yes but I’m very tired. The symptoms become so intense I wonder how they aren’t damaging my poor brain?!

 

How quickly are you micro

Tapering down?

 

Can you let us know what Baylissa says today, I love to hear it and so many of us can't speak with her.

Unless of course, something very personal  .  Mary ☮️💜🙏☮️💜🙏

[[Ma...]]

Chinchuck

 

It's a fantastic sign that you are getting good days though! Healing is on its way.

How's the weight and eating? Mine is still a great worry and sitting is so uncomfortable. I'm trying to go for a walk everyday and do some home exercises but my bum seems to want to fade away.

 

Gypsy welcome!

 

That's amazing that you have come back and many have moved on and healed. Have they written success stories? That must give you so much hope. I haven't been around long enough yet to witness somebody heal but that will give me so much hope when it happens! <3 I hope it comes soon for all of us.

 

I am micro tapering valium. Down to 2.48mg and its been brutal. The drug has slowly then rapidly destroyed my life. However i'm hanging on, looking after myself as best i can until healing arrives. I am still shocked at the devestation this drug can cause though. Have you come off your benzo? Is it just the amitriptyline you've got left to taper? I have taken that drug many years ago.

 

Caren

 

I'm so happy for you that you made such positive changes and they really paid off for you! I was semi functional last year but unfortunatley the drug rapidly turned on me and I had to give up work and am now mostly housebound. But my next goal is to complete my taper and hopefully true healing will then happen for me. (Or before if i'm super lucky!)

 

 

I don't really want to go into too much detail r.e symptoms because it could be scary and triggering. Internal akathisia is a very intense feeling that I can only describe as wanting to get out of your own body. It's intense internal agitation. The glutamate storms are like a chemical feeling in my brain of extreme terror and agitation. I cannot sleep or get comfortable. It's awful but I want to keep this thread positive and hopeful and don't want to scare anyone with my experiences.

 

 

Hello Mary <3

 

 

I have private consultations with her so the content is personal. We talk about my taper, symptoms and future healing. She reassures me that I will heal and EVERYBODY does. Nobody is permenantly damaged. She is right. I also have huge issues with weight loss and muscle wastage so she reassures me that I will survive this taper as I worry I won't. She is an amazing lady, I love her so much. She never fails to cheer me up and keep hope alive, in my heart <3

 

I'd encourage anyone to talk to her if they can! She has seen thousands and thousands of people heal from these drugs.

 

 

I hope everyone is well and is making the most of their healing time.

 

 

I'll leave everyone with this quote from a book i'm reading at present...

 

 

"The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it"

 

I understand, isn't she in England?  But just hearing again we all heal from someone experienced is helpful.  Thanls

[[ea...]]

Gypsy,

I would like to get to know you. I have been here for almost 7 years. Did you write a Success Story? I would like to read it.

I too took a break from BB for several years. I think that is a normal part of real healing. Eventually one has to move away and tiptoe into real life. But like you, I came back and am enjoying the comradery here. Once a Benzo Survivor, always one.

I believe that there is a reason why I am back. I just don't know what it is yet.

east

[[Ma...]]

Gypsy,

I would like to get to know you. I have been here for almost 7 years. Did you write a Success Story? I would like to read it.

I too took a break from BB for several years. I think that is a normal part of real healing. Eventually one has to move away and tiptoe into real life. But like you, I came back and am enjoying the comradery here. Once a Benzo Survivor, always one.

I believe that there is a reason why I am back. I just don't know what it is yet.

east

 

It's obvious to us eastcoast, you care and want to help which you do everyday.  Love to you and Bear, Mary 🐈🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾 🤗