What's the longest you've been without sleep?

[[Mr...]]

Out of anonymous internet politeness  - it's not my stance to doubt or dismiss other peoples experiences here.

 

 

But as someone who's studied sleep a great deal, I must say .... I would be very very surprised if some of these claims (e.g. 2 weeks+ or even 1 week+) were accurate evaluations. I think if members claiming this were hooked up to a sleep tracker they'd also be very surprised.

 

 

Some of this thread feels a bit like a student competition of who slept least, but I do believe the claims feel authentic. I just think it's far more likely that brief sleeps e.g. 10 minute blips, or micro-sleeps occurred without clear perception, especially while lying down. Withdrawal sleep is also often so shallow and dreamless that it seems barely to be the real thing. If you were lying down in bed for 8 hours, it's reasonably hard to say you didn't sleep for a single minute, unless you were being monitored accurately.

 

 

During withdrawal, clear perception of time and memory also becomes a blur.

 

 

After several days awake, your body will start to build a huge drive towards sleep that will override most neurochemical situations. It has some "backup generators" for this. I remember at 3 days awake, I felt so unwell and like I could never sleep again, then out of nowhere my body just kind of forcibly powered itself off for 3 hours. I remember feeling reassured that my body would do that if it absolutely needed to. That my perception and fear wasn't accurate. Your body is sophisticated, and will find ways to get small amounts of rest if it absolutely needs it.

 

 

I'm saying all this just because reading a thread like this could give members a lot of fear of not sleeping for similar lengths of time. Fear of not sleeping will certainly stop you from doing so, especially during withdrawal. But I believe it's far more helpful to have peace of mind that nothing bad will happen after a few days without sleep, and that when you get to a certain point of exhaustion, to have faith that your body will find a way of sleeping. You won't find anyone posting in this thread who didn't sleep eventually. You will too. 

[[Th...]]

Wanna know whats funny about people being up 2+ weeks? If the Guiness Record's Still had a sleep deprived Record you guys would be the new winners

 

Longest anyone stayed up was 11 days,that was some guy Named Randy Gardner in the 60's...hes still alive today actually

 

Mark, I don't think it is funny/strange/unbelievable...it is just undocumented.  Randy Gardner has the longest "documented" record at 11 days and some hours and minutes without taking any stimulants.  He was purposely trying to stay awake and had "normal" brain chemistry.  He did NOT have Benzo altered Brain chemistry. 

 

MTFan could very well be the "new winner" if it were documented.  But her goal was to get sleep.  Randy Gardner's goal was to stay awake.  Not sure why MTFan would "lie" to win an award that will never be given out to her?  People on the "insomnia" forum are trying to recover.  They are not trying out for the USA Olympic non-sleeping team. 

[[Th...]]

Well said MrEggplant. 

[[al...]]

When we talk about sleepless nights we really should be saying no perceived sleep. I went 5 night with no perceived sleep, but I am almost 100% positive that I experienced micro-sleeps and periods of light sleep that I was unaware of. Still, that is not enough sleep to feel good the next day. Now if I remained out of bed and active for 5 nights straight, that would have been a different story.

[[MT...]]

Aloha and some others are right that a piece of this is about perceived sleep. There is the possibility that some stage one sleep occurs when there is no awareness of sleep. Some of that may have occurred during my very long stretches. Probably not when I was up walking the floors, reading, meditating, watching TV, etc. but I certainly can't rule it out. At the same time, a brain in benzo wd is not like a normal brain. We are capable of going without sleep in ways that are absolutely impossible for "normal" brains. Who among us hasn't had a symptom during wd that a physician has said is impossible? Insomnia is even more outside the medical community's understanding of how sleep works.

 

From my perspective, threads like this aren't about bragging or horror stories. They're about challenging the notion that you can't live without a certain amount of sleep. How often do we hear, how often have we ourselves said, "I can't do____ unless I get ___ amount of sleep?" I wasted so much time not doing things because I thought I had to be able to sleep before I socialized/hiked/traveled, etc. Enough time finally passed that I realized that I wasn't living and time was dragging terribly. I needed to be willing to do these things, engage with life, even if I hadn't slept at all. It was often very uncomfortable but not always and it was never the catastrophe I expected. So the point is, part of the healing journey is to accept that while sleep is wonderful, not sleeping doesn't have to destroy our capacity to carry on and live our lives. It's our perception of how much sleep we absolutely must have that's far more limiting than the actual need for that amount of sleep.

[[Th...]]

Aloha and some others are right that a piece of this is about perceived sleep. There is the possibility that some stage one sleep occurs when there is no awareness of sleep. Some of that may have occurred during my very long stretches. Probably not when I was up walking the floors, reading, meditating, watching TV, etc. but I certainly can't rule it out. At the same time, a brain in benzo wd is not like a normal brain. We are capable of going without sleep in ways that are absolutely impossible for "normal" brains. Who among us hasn't had a symptom during wd that a physician has said is impossible? Insomnia is even more outside the medical community's understanding of how sleep works.

 

From my perspective, threads like this aren't about bragging or horror stories. They're about challenging the notion that you can't live without a certain amount of sleep. How often do we hear, how often have we ourselves said, "I can't do____ unless I get ___ amount of sleep?" I wasted so much time not doing things because I thought I had to be able to sleep before I socialized/hiked/traveled, etc. Enough time finally passed that I realized that I wasn't living and time was dragging terribly. I needed to be willing to do these things, engage with life, even if I hadn't slept at all. It was often very uncomfortable but not always and it was never the catastrophe I expected. So the point is, part of the healing journey is to accept that while sleep is wonderful, not sleeping doesn't have to destroy our capacity to carry on and live our lives. It's our perception of how much sleep we absolutely must have that's far more limiting than the actual need for that amount of sleep.

 

Bravo MTfan.  Very well said.  You are a "TRUE Benzo/Insomnia Warrior!"  And an inspiration to many.  Keep up the great work! 

[[Ru...]]

Hi Everyone....Is it normal to feel like you are sick .....or to feel that  you have some sort of disease from lack of REAL  sleep?  My husband will ask if I slept....I will tell him, well, I was out a little bit....but it really isn't sleep....it is so hard to explain this to people.  My sleep is not deep and is not refreshing.....

 

MtFan - What were your withdrawal symptoms when you went off Amitriptyline?  I have been off for 3 months (after 7 years)...is it kinda the same withdrawal as Klonopin?    I never feel sleepy or tired, feel wired a lot, ...cannot take a nap.....

 

Thanks so much Everyone!!!! 

[[Th...]]

Runnergirl,

 

It is pretty normal to feel "sick" during WD, especially when you don't sleep.  I always had an impending sense of "doom" feeling that I could not really explain during that whole time.  You are probably getting some light sleep that doesn't register as sleep to you because, as you said, it is not refreshing.  Even though I wake up 3-4 times per night I get 2-3 and sometimes 4 hour stretches of sleep that must have some deep sleep in them as I feel pretty darn good the next day.  The only time I feel tired is on the 2-3 hour nights that still happen 2-3 times per month.

 

One thing that I found that helped some is not talking about sleep with anyone except for people on this forum.  My wife used to ask if I slept and I just stopped replying to her so she stopped asking.  I think telling your spouse you didn't sleep only reinforces that you "should" feel like crap.  When in reality, I had a few zero nights in January and February where I felt fine the next day.  I kept thinking in my head, "why am I not tired?" I am broken, I have some weird form of insomnia, etc.

 

Remember recovery is nonlinear...up and down.  You will have periods where you get some sleep, followed by stretches of poor or no sleep.  No rhyme or reason to anything, it is on its own schedule.  Very frustrating and annoying.  But understanding that it will most likely play out that way makes it a bit easier to deal with. 

 

Not feeling tired and not being able to nap are also pretty common for a lot of people going through WD.  It will even out.  It just takes time.  Not what you want to hear, but you are not broken and you don't have some other illness or condition.  It's all still Bezno and Amit WD!  You'll get there.  Acceptance and Distraction are key. 

[[az...]]

Can’t read much but wanted to say how frustrating it is that I don’t know what the longest was.

 

Because I have logs of suffering to prove that my enthusiasm is also not so much out of me ego/ but me pain and me frustration.

 

Maybe if me talk like baby then the message won’t offend?

 

Me don’t care what me lookie like. Me can look like me darn crazy fool, me no care.

 

Little 33yr old silly me want solution!

 

Kind, polite, poop eating me wild and want help for benzobuddies silly fellow benzodiazepine victims.

 

Yes, me is victim. Me is so sorry we is all not believed, maybe that why me a wittwle upset. Aw, cute!

 

Good job little guys, we have some ground to still cover.

 

 

So sow-wy.

[[St...]]

I was given Valium and seroquel in detox. I was in there 10 days and only slept 1 night.

[[St...]]

When we talk about sleepless nights we really should be saying no perceived sleep. I went 5 night with no perceived sleep, but I am almost 100% positive that I experienced micro-sleeps and periods of light sleep that I was unaware of. Still, that is not enough sleep to feel good the next day. Now if I remained out of bed and active for 5 nights straight, that would have been a different story.

 

I had 4 hours sleep in 8 days. I was out of bed and active. Only reason I got that was because I took something. Some of our brains will not shut down because they are chemically altered.

[[az...]]

Someone I live with makes it impossible to feel rested, I am beginning to consider how mentally healthy/responsible they really are and whether they may have mental illness themselves?

[[ke...]]

For a 2 month period I was up all night half the nights and never got more than 3 hrs of light twilight airplane seat sleep. It was ungodly horrible and the nausea that resulted was atrocious. There were three day stretches of zero.

[[St...]]

The problem with me is that I do feel very tired. So tired I can't open my eyes. I walk around like a zombie and can't barely hold my head up.

[[Ni...]]

Guys, my sleep has returned to "normal". I now get 6 to 8 hours sleep each night. I still toss and turn all night long with multiple awakenings but it's better than nothing.

I've already mentioned it but what really helps me is to eat something before bed, i eat a banana and a spoonful of peanut butter.

I also drink chamomile tea at 8pm and 5mg zyrtec at 10pm only if i have the feeling that i won't be able to sleep before 11pm.

 

The anxiety during the day is still horrific but it becomes manageable after the chamomile tea so that i can sleep. I don't believe it hinders my recovery.

 

I've come to the conclusion that it's the current life experiences that caused the insomnia, i'm dealing with multiple horrific events that i do not wish my worst enemy. Whenever i focus on these situations the unnerving anxiety and panic thus insomia returns , mainly due to my sensitized CNS/ANS.

Unfortunately i can't keep sticking my head in the sand. 

[[MT...]]

Hey Nick, that's fantastic! I'm glad you've seen some improvement in your sleep and I hope that the horrific events you're coping with settle down.

[[Aj...]]

When I first got ME/CFS I quite literally didn’t sleep at all for months.

[[Ni...]]

My sleep is still "normal" but i'm now suffering more from allergy-induced sleep apnea so i wake up like a wreck and only start to feel better in late afternoon.

[[So...]]

I am going through a horrible wave due to starting omeprazole last week. Haven't slept in two days and the myoclonic jerks are back with a vengeance, and I am terrified and depressed. My CNS is so hypersensitive still. I thought I was getting better. Had a good month of okay sleep and other symptoms gone. I asked my GI doc if the drug was going to affect my sleep; of course, she said no; but if I got worse to let her know. I should have know better than to trust her.  I am stopping the drug as of today; my stomach feels better. I just have to extra careful with diet and supplements. It is just mind blowing how other drugs can affect one at this stage of withdrawal. I am praying that my sleep will return. Up until last week I was sleeping 4-5 hours and being functional to the point that my husband told I looked like my normal self. I was feelng hopeful; and then the GI issue got worse and made a bad choice. I will assume that omeprazole may affect serotonin in the gut. Unfortunately, I am one of those sensitive to this drug. I know of other members who have no issues with it. Has anyone have issues with this kind of ppi or has anyone has had a setback to another drug while in withdrawal? How long did it take to pass? I don't mean to scare anyone or discourage anyone, but certainly having a thread like this helps us vent and find some solace and community support which is crucial for recovery. I truly want to believe that this will pass, will it?

 

Peace and love 

[[MT...]]

Solyana,

 

I was surprised by how many GI drugs can cause insomnia. Sometimes it's a rare side effect but post wd we tend to hoover up any possible insomnia from any drug. I kept trying them and kept running into either insomnia or headaches. So frustrating. I know some people use apple cider vinegar and my function med doc has recommended I go on the low FODMAP diet so I'm going to work towards that. Good luck! I bet your sleep will return to your baseline faster than you expect. Hang in there, my friend.

 

MT

[[Da...]]

I am going through a horrible wave due to starting omeprazole last week. Haven't slept in two days and the myoclonic jerks are back with a vengeance, and I am terrified and depressed. My CNS is so hypersensitive still. I thought I was getting better. Had a good month of okay sleep and other symptoms gone. I asked my GI doc if the drug was going to affect my sleep; of course, she said no; but if I got worse to let her know. I should have know better than to trust her.  I am stopping the drug as of today; my stomach feels better. I just have to extra careful with diet and supplements. It is just mind blowing how other drugs can affect one at this stage of withdrawal. I am praying that my sleep will return. Up until last week I was sleeping 4-5 hours and being functional to the point that my husband told I looked like my normal self. I was feelng hopeful; and then the GI issue got worse and made a bad choice. I will assume that omeprazole may affect serotonin in the gut. Unfortunately, I am one of those sensitive to this drug. I know of other members who have no issues with it. Has anyone have issues with this kind of ppi or has anyone has had a setback to another drug while in withdrawal? How long did it take to pass? I don't mean to scare anyone or discourage anyone, but certainly having a thread like this helps us vent and find some solace and community support which is crucial for recovery. I truly want to believe that this will pass, will it?

 

Peace and love 

 

Solyluna: Thanks so much for posting this! I've had brutal stomach problems during withdrawal (I've had to be on a pure liquid diet for over a month) and the doc has recommended PPIs and written me a prescription, but I haven't filled it yet. I'm wary of taking any sort of drug now. Shortly after my total withdrawal, I was sleeping terribly (around 3 hours per night) and in my desperation for sleep tried every sort of alternative sedative/anxiolytic type substance. ALL produced various forms of terrible anxiety and sedation. It seems weird to be sedated and anxious at the same time, but believe me, it's possible and it's horrific. The first time I tried some herbal type sedative I stupidly took the entire pill and thought I was going to die. I was so incredibly sedated that I could barely move, and was afraid if I went to sleep I would stop breathing and die. I was alone in my apartment and could not call for help. After this I was extremely careful, but it seems I cannot tolerate any sort of substance, natural or man-made, which has anxiolytic or sedative properties. I'm about 10 weeks into protracted withdrawal right now.

 

Just FYI, substances I have tried that have caused problems: Kava, glycine, tryptophan, St. John's Wort, melatonin, pregabalin, Nyquill, Gravol, domperidone etc. You get the idea, I was persistent, but slow to learn that nothing would help and likely was only making things worse and slowing recovery.

 

BTW, the longest I've been without sleep is only around 48 hours, and I was certain I would die. I don't know how you guys go 72 or more. TheWay, you must be a tough hombre, going to work with zero sleep for 72 hours. That's an impressive display of willpower.

[[So...]]

Mtfan: I am so happy to hear from you always, and thank you for your tips. Most definitely I am following a foodmap and a low histamine diet for sure. It is helping. Good thing I can eat some; but still the bloating and pressure is kind of hard to withstand which contributes to anxiety or is it the other way around? I am also happy to say that after I stopped the omeprazole I was able to sleep 5 hrs straight; last night was kind of choppy though, but got some sleep and feel I can function today. My CNS is super sensitive, and got to be careful with whatever I put in my mouth.

 

CountChocula: Having the GI issues is the worst; and I am sorry for your suffering...I feel your pain. I have been battling insomnia for a long time also; but incredibly I have become such a more resilient person from this experience that I am coping with this the best I can. Those two nights that I couldn't sleep, I managed to do house chores, go to the store, go for gentle yoga and pool, get some sun, tai chi, play the piano, and do lots of meditation and praying (and some crying as well, it was liberating). Before that would have freaked me out to the point to go to the ER. So I guess I am learning how to deal with insomnia better; but dealing with GI issues is another 'bear'. My GI issues stemmed from using Ibuprofen, so I don't know if what I feel is due to 'benzo belly'. I just feel bloting and pressure and some heartburn. I am taking Acid Sooth from Enzymatic therapy, DGL, Iberogast, Miralax, Slippery Elm tea from organic bark, and trying potato raw juice. I tried something with bentonite clay and it was too much for my tummy; but I hear it can help some people. GI issues causes a lot of anxiety. Last night I had to take taurine and it helped greatly; hopefully I won't have to take it tonight. I am considering trying niacinamide. I don't see your signature, it would be helpful if you create one. You might want to try a low dose of ppi first. It was working for me until I increased it to 40mg. If my new protocol doesn't work, I may consider going back to 20mg. However, all this changes causes more stress to the system; but what else can we do? My GI doc said I had to choose either an alternative method or a conventional one. I know some people have lost a lot of weight and had to the IV nutrients. I am not losing weight yet, have you? I will assume that yes.

 

 

[[Da...]]

Hi Solyluna,

 

Thanks for the reply. I agree, GI issues are brutal. It increases my anxiety just about 100% of the time, because i know I won't be able to eat enough to maintain my weight and lose more (I've lost around 25lbs, or 16% of my body weight). I really don't want to go on IV nutrients, although it might help the anxiety. The GI issues are always much worse when I sleep less, so it's a vicious cycle. Right now I'm trying an elimination diet (just starting today). I'm amazed it's taken me this long, but I downloaded an article from google scholar reviewing the treatment for bloating and gas and much of it I had either tried or was it medication I knew I wouldn't be able to tolerate (such as prokinetic drugs etc.). The only thing I hadn't truly tried was the elimination diet. I'm starting with egg whites, rice milk, prune juice, hypoallergenic protein powder and liquefied potatoes. It's pretty gross, and it's too early to tell whether it might work, but I thought it would be worth putting a concerted effort into if it can alleviate the bloating even a bit.

 

I'm sorry you've had to go through this too. It has been by far the worst experience of my life. I've thought I was going to die many times. I had no idea someone could be so completely exhausted and still be alive. When I get healthy (I'm saying when even though I still can't convince myself it will happen) I am going to go on an absolute anti-benzo rampage. My doctor actually denied it was protracted withdrawal and tried to diagnose me with somatoform disorder and some of my family were even convinced that's what it was until I assailed them with information about it from youtube, benzowithdrawalhelp.com, and some academic articles. I'm absolutely disgusted that it has been studied so little. I thought that some doctors would at least take an interest in it. You'd figure if you were a smart person interested in healthcare and medicine, getting paid $300K per year, at least someone would take an interest in making a thorough study of it. But a lot of them seem to ignore it, or worse, simply deny it exists. I think Heather Ashton is one of the only ones to study long term dependence and protracted withdrawal. This really needs to change.

 

I hope you can find some relief from the GI stuff, I know from experience it's incredibly uncomfortable.

[[So...]]

Hello CountChocula:

 

If you don't mind I will PM since I would like to chat with you a bit more about GI stuff. This thread, I believe, is geared more towards 'insomnia', what do you think?

 

I agree that some conventional doctors don't have any idea about benzo withdrawal. When I went to the GI office, I got to see a PA and she told me that I should have any problems with the ppi in spite of  me telling my concerns of having a hypersentive CNS because of the benzo wd. When I asked her if I had to wean off the ppi, she said that according to medical case evidence research there was no such thing as acid rebound from stopping a ppi. When I stopped after 8 dys, I experienced it. Good thing she is leaving and will see an MD next time...if I go back. She said to go back if I don't get better, so I am left now with the overwhelming task to trying to heal myself in a more natural way and pray to God for healing.

 

Glad you posted your signature.

 

 

[[Su...]]

Mreggplant...

 

I totally agree. I am 6 months out from an accidental CT. I have had no more than 0-3 hours sleep this whole time. Over the last week I have had hallucinations and have became almost psychotic and attacked my husband. Don’t even really remember it. Last night out of desperation I took a combo of Gabapentin and Baicalin (skullcap) I slept 8 hours. I woke up this morning with not a single symptom.

 

If you look at a list of symptoms of sleep deprivation it will look almost identical to a list of withdrawal symptoms from Benzos. I also notice as soon as sleep turns around for the lucky ones, their symptoms clear up and they are healed!!!

 

Sleep deprivation is what separates those who heal and those who linger. In my opinion only. I have not one fact to base this on. Only what I observe here on these boards.

 

It makes me sad because I am one of the unlucky ones who cannot seem to get their sleep back. And I was a great sleeper before. 8-10 hours. I was out like a light as soon as my head hit the pillow.

 

I now doubt I will ever see those days again. I was also on Ativan. Which, in my opinion only seems to be the sleep killer Benzo. Almost all insomnia board sufferers were Ativan users.

 

So, I like a few others, will be destined to a life if 3-4 hours sleep in a year or two or I will have to make the decision to try to go back on a Benzo and hopefully get my sleep back.

 

Mark my words, one day in the near future there will be a class action suit against Ativan. Unfortunately, it won’t help us.