Here Comes The Pain Again

[[cl...]]

So sorry to hear Dee! I seem to be having many many big waves this week. I can only hope it's my impending PERIOD!!

 

F4M- Still thinking of you of course. My wish for you today is to have a few moments of comfort.

 

I KNOW this will get better. I KNOW IT!!! I am so looking forward to a day when we report sunshine and happiness instead of continual hell.

 

We are warriors, no question about it.

 

Hugs and LOVE!!!

 

~Sum

[[Fi...]]

Things have gotten much worse.  I’m starting to think this is something way more then Benzo WD.  The intensity has increased, which I didn’t think was possible.  And, I’m having severe confusion and disorientation.  Not sure what to do, very Scared.   

 

Think of you all.

[[cl...]]

Thinking of you F4M. I wish I could take your pain away!!!!!!!

 

 

MUCH MUCH LOVE

[[de...]]

Just replied F4M and summer but it got zapped.

 

Haven't got it in me to redo.  Feel screwed. 

 

WE WILL TRIUMPH!

 

Our day will come! 

 

Dee 

[[cl...]]

Big big love Dee,

 

Healing to you F4M

[[Fi...]]

Much Love Clay and Dee❤️  Dee, I got the PM Thanks.  Wishing healing to you both.

[[Fi...]]

Just Don’t think this is a Benzo Headache.  It’s on another level.  This is unreal!  My parents gave me a lecture that I’m making this up and I’m punishing myself in some way.  That the pain I feel must be made up, like Conversion Disorder.  I insisted that there is nothing for me to gain by being in so much pain.  And, that there has to be some other explanation.  Why would anyone make something like this up?  I know what I feel is real.  I keep hoping they will find something so I can prove them wrong.  I’m in such significant pain, daily.  To not be believed just breaks my heart.  Has me all messed up thinking I’m a nut case. 

[[de...]]

Oh this so sucks F4M. 

 

You've got pain in your head and I've got nothing in my head, feel muted, deadlike.  No life.  Just want to cry....I need to shower and clean my teeth but couldn't give a F.  It doesn't feel like depression, just nothing.  Trying to find strength in nothingness. 

 

Just to try and reassure you F4M do I recall you saying that you did get some respite from your headache and symptoms changed.  Might be that symptoms are cycling and the head pain is the big one for you? 

 

We really do have to just put one foot in front of the other, learn acceptance, and not be hard on ourselves.  Distraction is good but I want to think, not just distract.  Will try today. 

 

When in doubt play a pawn.  Think I got checked. 

 

Dee x

[[gi...]]

Here comes the pain again, but I want to get away from the pain.

[[Rx...]]

Just Don’t think this is a Benzo Headache.  It’s on another level.  This is unreal!  My parents gave me a lecture that I’m making this up and I’m punishing myself in some way.  That the pain I feel must be made up, like Conversion Disorder.  I insisted that there is nothing for me to gain by being in so much pain.  And, that there has to be some other explanation.  Why would anyone make something like this up?  I know what I feel is real.  I keep hoping they will find something so I can prove them wrong.  I’m in such significant pain, daily.  To not be believed just breaks my heart.  Has me all messed up thinking I’m a nut case.

 

Been there.  Screamed in pain from my withdrawal head pain.  Like a vice tightening around my head.  ER level and went to the ER for them where they did treat them.  Neurologist and detox doctor also had to inject me with Toradol and Zofran simultaneously.  They passed a long while ago (all head pain and migraines) completely. You not being believed breaks my heart for you. I believe you because I lived it.  Even if I didn't live it, after all I experienced, I would not doubt any suffering on this forum.

[[de...]]

I believe you too F4M hope you didn't misinterpret my post was just trying to reassure you that I believed it to be WD.  F4M 

 

I've always believed you F4M.

 

Dee xxx

[[de...]]

F4M 

 

Told you my head was blank. 

 

For some reason I thought maybe it appeared I might have disbelieved you, and I'm usually not that paranoid or sensitive til I reread your post and found it was your disbelieving parents.

 

Pretend I'm 10 y.o. F4M - parents suck 

 

It was really good to read Rx's post.  Take heart F4M. 

 

Dee x

 

[[Fi...]]

RX, Dee, Ginger, Clay.  Thank You.        Having a very very rough day. 

 

Hoping you all are well.

[[cl...]]

Much much much love and big hugs f4m

 

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[[de...]]

What's happening for you F4M?  Please, a window soon. 

 

I think my windows have been sealed by the militia.  By this I mean I feel like I'm stabilising since last cut, but still feel so detached, DR, fear and tremor, can't eat and losing weight.  Still cutting 5% next week. 

 

Watched a video yesterday on titration and saw inside this poor guy's flat (apartment  ) and I didn't feel so bad, it looked exactly like my place.  I just haven't got it in me, and I laugh hollowly. 

 

If I don't have a shower today someone's going to call the Health Department.  Sorry, but it's true 

 

Dee xxx

 

 

 

 

[[Fi...]]

Dee,  You are going to be just fine!    I think we all could use a shower......

 

I’m in pain hell!    There has to be more to it.  The pain doctor said he can’t help me.  So, yet another doctor that is of no help.  Really has me freaking scared.  The pain is sooo unbearable.  Maybe I have Lyme or something I’ve over looked that would be causing this level of pain.  Thinking even hurts. 

 

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

 

Hugs. 

[[de...]]

Are the doctors acknowledging that it's WD F4M, or are they still saying either anxiety or neuropathy? 

 

I was scrolling through the Post Recovery and Success Stories Forums and saw a number of posts where people suffered excruciating headaches.  It seems that people do get this symptom, not that that's of any real comfort. 

 

It's a sad little suggestion F4M but maybe either some eucalyptus oil, or lavender oil on your pillow slip at night? 

 

It may not relieve your headache, but it would smell nice.  🌹 🌺 🌲 🍃

 

Koala bears eat eucalyptus leaves and they always look chilled out.  Stoned even. 

 

I'm not being flip F4M just that you have been enduring this for so long I hate to see you suffer.  This thing is so gruelling. 

 

Dee 

 

 

[[Rx...]]

Just popping in with hope you feel better soon wishes for all. 

 

 

[[Fi...]]

RX, Dee, Clay, Sum.  Thank you for checking on me and offering your support.  Nothing is helping with the pain.  It’s like my sensory perception is the opposite of what it should be.  If that makes any sense.  All stimuli example, eating, wind, anything that excites my brain equals pain for me.  I just don’t understand it.  It’s beyond comprehension. And, anything I try for relief, does nothing.  Even massaging my temples makes it hurt more.  Scared that I have Lyme or something that is causing all this 24/7 distressing pain and cognitive issues.  I won’t be posting.  No need to stress others out with my rare case. 

Want you to know that I’m thinking of you All and wishing Speedy Heeling!  You are such strong and amazing people!!!

[[Rx...]]

RX, Dee, Clay, Sum.  Thank you for checking on me and offering your support.  Nothing is helping with the pain.  It’s like my sensory perception is the opposite of what it should be.  If that makes any sense.  All stimuli example, eating, wind, anything that excites my brain equals pain for me.  I just don’t understand it.  It’s beyond comprehension. And, anything I try for relief, does nothing.  Even massaging my temples makes it hurt more.  Scared that I have Lyme or something that is causing all this 24/7 distressing pain and cognitive issues.  I won’t be posting.  No need to stress others out with my rare case. 

Want you to know that I’m thinking of you All and wishing Speedy Heeling!  You are such strong and amazing people!!!

 

You don't stress me.  I was never strong about this level of stuff because my brain would not allow me to be anyhow.  I was terrified.  Only human.

[[cl...]]

No stress here either F4M. Please keep posting. I'm sure I am not only speaking for myself when I say we worry about you. It's what we're here for isn't it? To help each other? Being here for y'all helps me overcome my own pain (and self pity).

 

I just KNOW it will be better for you. I know it.

 

We care about you. We are here for you.

 

Big love!

[[Fi...]]

RX, Dee, Clay, Sum.  Thank you for checking on me and offering your support.  Nothing is helping with the pain.  It’s like my sensory perception is the opposite of what it should be.  If that makes any sense.  All stimuli example, eating, wind, anything that excites my brain equals pain for me.  I just don’t understand it.  It’s beyond comprehension. And, anything I try for relief, does nothing.  Even massaging my temples makes it hurt more.  Scared that I have Lyme or something that is causing all this 24/7 distressing pain and cognitive issues.  I won’t be posting.  No need to stress others out with my rare case. 

Want you to know that I’m thinking of you All and wishing Speedy Heeling!  You are such strong and amazing people!!!

 

You don't stress me.  I was never strong about this level of stuff because my brain would not allow me to be anyhow.  I was terrified.  Only human.

 

RX, Thank You.  I’m really scared.  I need to get to a point of helping others.  I’m so confused as to what is wrong with me.  Need to get my mind right.  Thank You.  You are so nice.

[[Fi...]]

No stress here either F4M. Please keep posting. I'm sure I am not only speaking for myself when I say we worry about you. It's what we're here for isn't it? To help each other? Being here for y'all helps me overcome my own pain (and self pity).

 

I just KNOW it will be better for you. I know it.

 

We care about you. We are here for you.

 

Big love!

 

Clay, Thank You for being so supportive and understanding.  I want to be in a place of being able to help others.  I’m scared that this issue of pain is escalating.  I hope it turns around, I really need it to.  Thank you for love and concern.  Wishing You Speedy Healing! 

[[cl...]]

Just allow help right now. You're in hell. We can feel it and hate it with you.

 

You have made me stronger.

 

You are a warrior.

 

[[Fi...]]

Just allow help right now. You're in hell. We can feel it and hate it with you.

 

You have made me stronger.

 

You are a warrior.

 

 

Thank you Clay,  I just don’t know how much more I can bear.  I just don’t know what is causing all this. 

 

You guys have been awesome.