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So I have decided to commit to updosing. Don't know to what yet, probably .5 mg. And I hope that is enough. I will taper at another time in life. I cannot do this anymore, since my son got sick and trying to figure out what to do with him. The pressure is relentless. Need to feel that I can parent without needing a trip to the psych ward. I don't know if .5 mg will be enough though, but need to try something. I am really disappointed; had hoped to be off in a year but that is not realistic if I am this symptomatic. I know others put their tapers on hold for years and then finish; hopefully I can be that person. I really think I cannot do this while I still have my son at home and just starting a new job.

 

We totally understand.  You have too much in your life right now that causes extreme stress.  You do what you must, which I know you have given a lot of thought.  We love you, you belong here and please keep us up to date on you and your son NJ.  Wishing you some peace and calmness.  Mary 💚💜💙

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I updosed 50% on sept 1st and felt great for about 10 days then felt like crap again...... not sure if it just takes a long time to stabiLize on an updose or if tolerance kicked in again that fast. I’m thinking about trying to updose again just so I can stabilize, at this point I don’t care how long my taper takes as long as I’m functional. A couple other options for me would be to switch over to Valium or spread my K dose into 3. Good luck to everyone out there that decides to updose please let us know how it goes.
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I updosed 50% on sept 1st and felt great for about 10 days then felt like crap again...... not sure if it just takes a long time to stabiLize on an updose or if tolerance kicked in again that fast. I’m thinking about trying to updose again just so I can stabilize, at this point I don’t care how long my taper takes as long as I’m functional. A couple other options for me would be to switch over to Valium or spread my K dose into 3. Good luck to everyone out there that decides to updose please let us know how it goes.

 

I updosed this week from .36 K to .5 mg. The nausea is now much reduced in the mornings (but still there). I have been less depressed which is essential, because honestly feeling suicidally depressed much of the time is no way to live. I am hoping the nausea does go away completely but if this is as good as it gets, it's okay. I am trying not to go above .5 mg if I can. I was on 1 mg for years before I started to taper, so keeping it at .5 mg is an accomplishment for me. I just hope I don't need to up it more, but I will do what I need to do. I am turning 50 this year and may just need to live with pharmaceuticals. It is what it is.

 

Still using the medical marijuana for sleep and daytime nausea. Hoping to switch to a different (almost no THC) strain during the day for the nausea, AC/DC. Plan to try it tomorrow.

 

Good luck to everyone on their journey. I know so many people are against updosing but I do think it is important to try to stay functional if we can.

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"I know so many people are against updosing but I do think it is important to try to stay functional if we can."  :thumbsup:

 

I've been watching the benzo "deprescribing" campaign going on in canada, especially as it affects people in assisted living/nursing homes. That idea & practice really does not appeal to me at all! I guess if I'm ever forced to do it, I won't have many options. But I ask myself:  "Why should I submit to that torture before it's absolutely necessary?" I've tried to taper/withdraw & it really does not set well with me. It would likely kill me or make me wish I were dead. I've also observed the anguish of too many protracted benzo w/d sufferers who now wish they had not tapered off or at least not tapered off so quickly or so much. I've also compared the lives of people I know who have overused alcohol & other substances which shortened their lives with those who have lived very long 'clean' lives. It often appears to me like the people who live the longest also suffer the longest and the people who live it up & die early suffer the least. It's been quite some time since I've studied the book of Ecclesiastes but, I recall this quote (modern translation): "So I recommend having fun, because there is nothing better for people in this world than to eat, drink, and enjoy life." :) best wishes

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Seems like I’m one of the unfortunate ones that updosing does not work for...... anyone felt it takes longer than a month to benefit from an updose? Or perhaps I should updose more.....
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Seems like I’m one of the unfortunate ones that updosing does not work for...... anyone felt it takes longer than a month to benefit from an updose? Or perhaps I should updose more.....

 

Your signature indicates you started your taper from 1.5mg K.  May I ask why did you taper to begin with? You really have not updosed very much nor have you stayed at that level for very long. Why do you think it will not work for you? 

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Seems like I’m one of the unfortunate ones that updosing does not work for...... anyone felt it takes longer than a month to benefit from an updose? Or perhaps I should updose more.....

 

Your signature indicates you started your taper from 1.5mg K.  May I ask why did you taper to begin with? You really have not updosed very much nor have you stayed at that level for very long. Why do you think it will not work for you?

 

I started tapering due to my pdoc retiring. The new pdoc told me all the dangers of benzos which I was clueless about.... and when tolerance started kicking in my new pdoc wouldnt alow me to increase my dose so I deceided to taper. I taper very slowly and it took me almost a year to go from .25 mg to .125mg so when I updosed back to .25 it seems like a very large updose to me since it took me a year. At the beginning of my taper it was easier and I was tapering faster but once I hit .5 I had to really slow down my taper that’s when it started getting really hard. I’m glad you think I haven’t help for that long that’s encouraging!

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So I have decided to commit to updosing. Don't know to what yet, probably .5 mg. And I hope that is enough. I will taper at another time in life. I cannot do this anymore, since my son got sick and trying to figure out what to do with him. The pressure is relentless. Need to feel that I can parent without needing a trip to the psych ward. I don't know if .5 mg will be enough though, but need to try something. I am really disappointed; had hoped to be off in a year but that is not realistic if I am this symptomatic. I know others put their tapers on hold for years and then finish; hopefully I can be that person. I really think I cannot do this while I still have my son at home and just starting a new job.

 

NJ I feel the same way you do, I have far too many responsibilities to be dealing with this right now. I am only 30 yo and everyone tells me I’m still young and should do it right now. But I have 2 young daughters, have to work and support my wife..... so I can’t just be bedridden for years how however long it takes to fully taper off and recover. Right now I’m just holding and praying I will stabilize soon and go on with my life for now. I also use cannabis at night time to help me sleep, I actually prefer indicas over cbd strains like ac/dc. I just started Remeron a week ago at a low dose of 7.5 and yes it’s helping me eat and sleep, but I’m a groggy zombie during the day which actually is way nicer than being in full blown panic mode all day. NJ why did you stop taking Remeron did you find it helpful? Tnx

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Seems like I’m one of the unfortunate ones that updosing does not work for...... anyone felt it takes longer than a month to benefit from an updose? Or perhaps I should updose more.....

 

]Hi  Firstly, it's never advisable to alternate doses. As it has been said on this forum before, that is akin to playing ping-pong with your CNS. You have to choose a dose and stick to that dose. Secondly, regarding the new symptoms, there could be one of two things happening: 1) The 20 mg is too much for your already sensitised nervous system; 2) your body is responding to (yet another) change in dosage. When I updosed from 11mg to 20 mg in late February this year, I was already experiencing withdrawal insomnia.

 

After the updose my symptoms got progressively worse. My insomnia worsened, my anxiety worsened and I had a whole new set of symptoms such as depression, ruminating thoughts ('I'm never going to get better'), dry mouth at night, night sweats, waking with anxiety and hot flushes. This went on for 2 weeks and got progressively worse. Thinking that my body could not cope with such a high dose, I dropped to 19mg for a week.

 

 

If I thought I had troubles before, well this was arguably the worst week of my life! The drop made things even worse. Finally on the 18th March I made a decision to stay put on 20mg and have been doing so ever since. Slowly my symptoms subsided. After 7.5 weeks on 20mg, I'm still not happy with my sleep but it is better. All other symptoms are gone.

 

So the point I'm making is: 1) Any change in dosage, whether you go up or down, may cause unwanted symptoms.

 

This is because any change in dosage when you have a destabilized CNS is going to add to that destabilization.

 

2) If you are attempting to stabilize on one specific dose for any given period of time and you choose to alter that dose (up or down), this has a tendency to 'reset the clock' in your nervous system so that any gains you may have made with regard to withdrawal symptoms improving or subsiding before you changed the dose are kind of 'wiped out' and you have to start all over again (at least this happened with me)

 

3) It can take a long (LONG) time to stabilize so you have to be patient. Some people stabilize in a week. For other is can take months

. If your symptoms aren't improving or are getting worse after an updose, it doesn't necessarily mean that you need drop your dosage; in some cases it certainly does, but in mine lowering the dose made things worse. Having said that, if you're experiencing serious issues such as elevated blood pressure and headaches you do have to be careful and discern between a serious adverse reaction and plain old garden variety withdrawal symptoms. Hope this information helps in some way:) [/size]

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I updosed 50% on sept 1st and felt great for about 10 days then felt like crap again...... not sure if it just takes a long time to stabiLize on an updose or if tolerance kicked in again that fast. I’m thinking about trying to updose again just so I can stabilize, at this point I don’t care how long my taper takes as long as I’m functional. A couple other options for me would be to switch over to Valium or spread my K dose into 3. Good luck to everyone out there that decides to updose please let us know how it goes.

 

I updosed this week from .36 K to .5 mg. The nausea is now much reduced in the mornings (but still there). I have been less depressed which is essential, because honestly feeling suicidally depressed much of the time is no way to live. I am hoping the nausea does go away completely but if this is as good as it gets, it's okay. I am trying not to go above .5 mg if I can. I was on 1 mg for years before I started to taper, so keeping it at .5 mg is an accomplishment for me. I just hope I don't need to up it more, but I will do what I need to do. I am turning 50 this year and may just need to live with pharmaceuticals. It is what it is.

 

Still using the medical marijuana for sleep and daytime nausea. Hoping to switch to a different (almost no THC) strain during the day for the nausea, AC/DC. Plan to try it tomorrow.

 

Good luck to everyone on their journey. I know so many people are against updosing but I do think it is important to try to stay functional if we can.

Hi Dub,

It seems that it often can take some time for some, or not be as effective as it once was.. But From what I have seen updosing is usually a good step and makes a significant difference.. Personaly I wouldnt dispair quite yet, and I can only realy guess from my experiences, but I could see how it could take a little while longer for some people.. My last low dose reinstatement took a lot longer than some previous dose corrections...

Keep your eye on the prize, so to speak..

Hope you feel better soon....

:)

 

NJ, Sorry I havnt caught up with you yet to wish you the best..

You sure have been putting in a huge effort for a long time... Personally I also think this is a good step for you at this point..(fwiw). -0.5 would be great, but if not.... Living life is the whole point...

 

As im sure you know I reinstated opiates at low dose years ago due to protracted sx... While not perfect that changed my life and is the reason I can slowly move forward...

Yes I will start tapering them ever so slowly (plan 1) soon, but thats my choice from where I stand now...

 

You have shown many times that you will make things happen for you, and I hope this will be the same you put the time you need into what life is now throwing at you.. My thoughts are also with you both as you face these new challenges that are unfolding, I wish you the very best outcome, and some quick and sound answers...

 

:)

 

I see Nova has popped in... :)

Hi there Mate...!!

Will have to catch up somewhere soon..!! I trust all is going ok..?

:)

 

 

 

 

 

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Fi...  I agree.  I do wish I were dead and have to figure out what to do.  Is your updose working?

Is it on your original med??

 

I am worse thn I was 2 years ago... and really only have gone sideways onto valium.

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I updosed 50% on sept 1st and felt great for about 10 days then felt like crap again...... not sure if it just takes a long time to stabiLize on an updose or if tolerance kicked in again that fast. I’m thinking about trying to updose again just so I can stabilize, at this point I don’t care how long my taper takes as long as I’m functional. A couple other options for me would be to switch over to Valium or spread my K dose into 3. Good luck to everyone out there that decides to updose please let us know how it goes.

 

I updosed this week from .36 K to .5 mg. The nausea is now much reduced in the mornings (but still there). I have been less depressed which is essential, because honestly feeling suicidally depressed much of the time is no way to live. I am hoping the nausea does go away completely but if this is as good as it gets, it's okay. I am trying not to go above .5 mg if I can. I was on 1 mg for years before I started to taper, so keeping it at .5 mg is an accomplishment for me. I just hope I don't need to up it more, but I will do what I need to do. I am turning 50 this year and may just need to live with pharmaceuticals. It is what it is.

 

Still using the medical marijuana for sleep and daytime nausea. Hoping to switch to a different (almost no THC) strain during the day for the nausea, AC/DC. Plan to try it tomorrow.

 

Good luck to everyone on their journey. I know so many people are against updosing but I do think it is important to try to stay functional if we can.

Hi Dub,

It seems that it often can take some time for some, or not be as effective as it once was.. But From what I have seen updosing is usually a good step and makes a significant difference.. Personaly I wouldnt dispair quite yet, and I can only realy guess from my experiences, but I could see how it could take a little while longer for some people.. My last low dose reinstatement took a lot longer than some previous dose corrections...

Keep your eye on the prize, so to speak..

Hope you feel better soon....

:)

 

NJ, Sorry I havnt caught up with you yet to wish you the best..

You sure have been putting in a huge effort for a long time... Personally I also think this is a good step for you at this point..(fwiw). -0.5 would be great, but if not.... Living life is the whole point...

 

As im sure you know I reinstated opiates at low dose years ago due to protracted sx... While not perfect that changed my life and is the reason I can slowly move forward...

Yes I will start tapering them ever so slowly (plan 1) soon, but thats my choice from where I stand now...

 

You have shown many times that you will make things happen for you, and I hope this will be the same you put the time you need into what life is now throwing at you.. My thoughts are also with you both as you face these new challenges that are unfolding, I wish you the very best outcome, and some quick and sound answers...

 

:)

 

I see Nova has popped in... :)

Hi there Mate...!!

Will have to catch up somewhere soon..!! I trust all is going ok..?

:)

 

Cant, thanks for the encouragement. I know I just need to be fully present when figuring out my son's health issues. I had not realized he was losing as much weight as he had been losing as I was so sick for so many months. The updose is helping with the depression, so I feel better to manage.

 

Dub, I am still on remeron but hope to taper that while I hold the klonopin. The remeron simply isn't helping me anymore. I began for sleep and nausea but it helps with neither. I have tried to go up in dosage but get too many symptoms (bad abdominal cramping and constipation). It is know to "poop out" so I think that is what I am experiencing. Some people seem to feel the taper with remeron is easy; others struggle. We'll see how I do. First I would like to get a diagnosis for my son so I am on steadier ground before tapering. If I were to do it over again, I would only take remeron a few times a week to avoid the dependence. At low doses it can be used that way, as it is mostly a sedative rather than an antidepressant. BTW, it took many weeks for me to get over the daytime drowsiness and fatigue.

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I have been on 2 benzos during my lifetime. The 1st was valium which I ignorantly tried quitting cold turkey a looong time ago. The doctors never told me what caused my illness but they successfully reinstated me on xanax which I continued until this past spring, when I began a taper because a young, new doctor suggested that I try to reduce 'a tad bit'. When I started feeling w/d's, I went into an ape crap frenzy to go down & got down to .25mg before I decided that my life isn't worth living in misery when the only direction to go was worse than where I came from; so I started a slow titration back upward hoping to find a level where I feel somewhat comfortable. I am currently at 1.0mg.  I would describe my current condition as tolerable but, not pleasant yet. I'll give it some more time then decide if I want to up dose again & by how much.

Fi...  I agree.  I do wish I were dead and have to figure out what to do.  Is your updose working?

Is it on your original med??

 

I am worse thn I was 2 years ago... and really only have gone sideways onto valium.

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I updosed 50% on sept 1st and felt great for about 10 days then felt like crap again...... not sure if it just takes a long time to stabiLize on an updose or if tolerance kicked in again that fast. I’m thinking about trying to updose again just so I can stabilize, at this point I don’t care how long my taper takes as long as I’m functional. A couple other options for me would be to switch over to Valium or spread my K dose into 3. Good luck to everyone out there that decides to updose please let us know how it goes.

 

I updosed this week from .36 K to .5 mg. The nausea is now much reduced in the mornings (but still there). I have been less depressed which is essential, because honestly feeling suicidally depressed much of the time is no way to live. I am hoping the nausea does go away completely but if this is as good as it gets, it's okay. I am trying not to go above .5 mg if I can. I was on 1 mg for years before I started to taper, so keeping it at .5 mg is an accomplishment for me. I just hope I don't need to up it more, but I will do what I need to do. I am turning 50 this year and may just need to live with pharmaceuticals. It is what it is.

 

Still using the medical marijuana for sleep and daytime nausea. Hoping to switch to a different (almost no THC) strain during the day for the nausea, AC/DC. Plan to try it tomorrow.

 

Good luck to everyone on their journey. I know so many people are against updosing but I do think it is important to try to stay functional if we can.

Hi Dub,

It seems that it often can take some time for some, or not be as effective as it once was.. But From what I have seen updosing is usually a good step and makes a significant difference.. Personaly I wouldnt dispair quite yet, and I can only realy guess from my experiences, but I could see how it could take a little while longer for some people.. My last low dose reinstatement took a lot longer than some previous dose corrections...

Keep your eye on the prize, so to speak..

Hope you feel better soon....

:)

 

NJ, Sorry I havnt caught up with you yet to wish you the best..

You sure have been putting in a huge effort for a long time... Personally I also think this is a good step for you at this point..(fwiw). -0.5 would be great, but if not.... Living life is the whole point...

 

As im sure you know I reinstated opiates at low dose years ago due to protracted sx... While not perfect that changed my life and is the reason I can slowly move forward...

Yes I will start tapering them ever so slowly (plan 1) soon, but thats my choice from where I stand now...

 

You have shown many times that you will make things happen for you, and I hope this will be the same you put the time you need into what life is now throwing at you.. My thoughts are also with you both as you face these new challenges that are unfolding, I wish you the very best outcome, and some quick and sound answers...

 

:)

 

I see Nova has popped in... :)

Hi there Mate...!!

Will have to catch up somewhere soon..!! I trust all is going ok..?

:)

Hi CF :hug: Still back paddling mate  ::) onward with the long  hold after my 9mg updose, still early days yet in long hold terms just over 2.1/2 months feels a LOT longer though :)

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

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http://www.benzosupport.org/crossover_schedules.htm

 

I just wanted to add this here in case it is helpful to anyone. If you scroll toward the bottom in miscellaneous notes he talks about updosing. I found the info helpful when I was updosing. Just like some of you have said it’s important to titration up just like you do down because the brain reacts to any change wether increase or decrease.

 

His  suggestions is to increase 1-2 mg Valium every three days until relief and then hold there. Adjust this if you are on k to .05 or .1mg. Someone told me their addiction doctor said to increase the small amount listed here every 3-5 days until relief.

 

Note that he also states in this article that tolerance hits at 2-6 months once you find your good dose. So be prepared to slowly start titrating down before this time or slowly titration up again at tolerance.

 

He also makes mention of dosing three days a day.

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http://www.benzosupport.org/crossover_schedules.htm

 

I just wanted to add this here in case it is helpful to anyone. If you scroll toward the bottom in miscellaneous notes he talks about updosing. I found the info helpful when I was updosing. Just like some of you have said it’s important to titration up just like you do down because the brain reacts to any change wether increase or decrease.

 

His  suggestions is to increase 1-2 mg Valium every three days until relief and then hold there. Adjust this if you are on k to .05 or .1mg. Someone told me their addiction doctor said to increase the small amount listed here every 3-5 days until relief.

 

Note that he also states in this article that tolerance hits at 2-6 months once you find your good dose. So be prepared to slowly start titrating down before this time or slowly titration up again at tolerance.

 

He also makes mention of dosing three days a day.

 

Wow thanks for sharing that Jen, I’m always on that site can’t believe I never saw that part. Dosing 3 times really makes sense but I feel so crappy right now I’m scared of moving my dosage times around and splitting them into 3. I almost want to just add an extra dose in so it would be .125 3 times. I do think I’m having interdose WD I feel the worst when I wake up after taking my morning dose I calm down a bit

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have a question==  am on low doses I guess.

i am still cutting off 5 mg or 10 mg pills... could that be a problem?  Maybe need to be on liquid or 2 mg valium tabs? 

3.4 valium and 10 ambien....

 

Gather an updose is not lik a few tenths valium, but much more for me?  And was on klon before other stuff added in caused acute at that time.  almost 2 yrs ago.

 

Thanks.

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have a question==  am on low doses I guess.

i am still cutting off 5 mg or 10 mg pills... could that be a problem?  Maybe need to be on liquid or 2 mg valium tabs? 

3.4 valium and 10 ambien....

 

Gather an updose is not lik a few tenths valium, but much more for me?  And was on klon before other stuff added in caused acute at that time.  almost 2 yrs ago.

 

Thanks.

 

Yes I would go over to the 2mg tabs if I was you, that’s one of the reason I want to switch over to Valium since it goes all the way to 2mg. I wouldn’t do the liquid first tho because the absorption and metabolism rate is different than tablets and dosnt work for everyone. Do you prefer Valium over klonopin? Still thinking about crossing over to V, Tnx

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Barbara,

 

My updose was a lot more from .36K to .5K. I do feel it a little bit but honestly had hoped more. If I do jump up again it will be in .125 dose because I really don't want to cut pills into tiny little pieces.

 

I am worried ... I am not sure the .5 is going to be enough. I am still not really that well but know if may take a while. The depression definitely creeping back in today. This whole thing is driving me crazy. I really just want to feel better. Trying to get an appt with my old psychiatrist who I know will just prescribe more stuff but I feel like right now I need something.

 

Hope you feel better whatever you decide to do.

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Barbara,

 

My updose was a lot more from .36K to .5K. I do feel it a little bit but honestly had hoped more. If I do jump up again it will be in .125 dose because I really don't want to cut pills into tiny little pieces.

 

I am worried ... I am not sure the .5 is going to be enough. I am still not really that well but know if may take a while. The depression definitely creeping back in today. This whole thing is driving me crazy. I really just want to feel better. Trying to get an appt with my old psychiatrist who I know will just prescribe more stuff but I feel like right now I need something.

 

Hope you feel better whatever you decide to do.

 

Hey Nj May I ask how many times a day you dose your K? I want to add in a .125 dose because I’m so sick of cutting and shaving and using a scale to get the right amount. But I was thinking about adding the extra .125 I’m between the 2 doses I’m already taking so I dose 3 times a day to see if that will help prevent interdose WD.

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Barbara,

 

My updose was a lot more from .36K to .5K. I do feel it a little bit but honestly had hoped more. If I do jump up again it will be in .125 dose because I really don't want to cut pills into tiny little pieces.

 

I am worried ... I am not sure the .5 is going to be enough. I am still not really that well but know if may take a while. The depression definitely creeping back in today. This whole thing is driving me crazy. I really just want to feel better. Trying to get an appt with my old psychiatrist who I know will just prescribe more stuff but I feel like right now I need something.

 

Hope you feel better whatever you decide to do.

 

All I have NJ is love and concern........and that you find a way to feel better soon.  Healing thoughts for your son :smitten: :smitten:

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Fi...  I agree.  I do wish I were dead and have to figure out what to do.  Is your updose working?

Is it on your original med??

 

I am worse thn I was 2 years ago... and really only have gone sideways onto valium.

 

Barbara, I don't have enough knowledge to give you any advice but I wanted you to know I think of you often and wish I could help you in some way, so my love and healing thoughts are headed your way and hoping very much you find some relief soon. :smitten::hug:💜 Mary

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Thanks Mary.  Thanks NJ.

 

You know, reading the posts it is sad we are all trying hard to get off this stuff and there are no great answers and most drs. don't even see there is a problem.

 

You meet some very nice people along the way, but is so hard to know what is a good idea... or not.

 

Dub i went to valium as was told it easier to get off.  I was on tiny dose of clon and should have held or updosed.  A group (not BB) suggestd I go valium and think that has not been good for me.  Hindsight.

 

I even wonder about getting off this after being on for decades.  This may just be stupid.

 

NJ, yes have thought of going to old psychiatrist... laying out the whole thing... how I tried to get off and can't.  He will start writing rx's in record time-- that is what he does.  Nice person, too.  But unlikely he would see a prob being on them or have taper plan as, well, he is the one told me i'd be o them rest of my life...  which may be true.

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Thanks Mary.  Thanks NJ.

 

You know, reading the posts it is sad we are all trying hard to get off this stuff and there are no great answers and most drs. don't even see there is a problem.

 

You meet some very nice people along the way, but is so hard to know what is a good idea... or not.

 

Dub i went to valium as was told it easier to get off.  I was on tiny dose of clon and should have held or updosed.  A group (not BB) suggestd I go valium and think that has not been good for me.  Hindsight.

 

I even wonder about getting off this after being on for decades.  This may just be stupid.

 

NJ, yes have thought of going to old psychiatrist... laying out the whole thing... how I tried to get off and can't.  He will start writing rx's in record time-- that is what he does.  Nice person, too.  But unlikely he would see a prob being on them or have taper plan as, well, he is the one told me i'd be o them rest of my life...  which may be true.

 

Hey barb I remember you asking about what the best generic of klonopin is a few weeks ago in the teva support group, are you still thinking about switching back over to klonopin.

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