Post Benzo Freedom Withdrawal Support Group

[[Iw...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

You just described my brain and my biggest cognitive issue.  My writing (and thinking about writing) has improved, but I used to be quick about it. Now it takes me forever to put words on paper. How are you at spelling?  I'm terrible! If it wasn't for spell check, I'd look like an imbecile (which is what I am, but no one knows b/c of spellcheck!). Speaking - holding a conversation in a group especially - is laborious.  In some ways it's improved; in others, it's gotten worse.

 

If you haven't tried lumosity I urge you to do so.  At first it made my brain tingle and I'd get very anxious and then fall dead asleep after doing it (showing how out of shape my brain was).  Now, I sail right through my daily exercises. Although, when I'm given a new game, my brain tingles and I get anxious.  But it's helped a lot, especially with memory.

 

It's under $20/month. It's the best investment I've ever made.  Let me know if you try it.

 

ginger

 

I used to be quick about it too. Yes, spelling has been an issuue too. I think grammar and  punctuation are worse. Blah.

Speaking in person, don't get much practise at that but it is difficult and I'm so forgetful.

Thank you for sharing lumosity and your experience with it. I'm glad its working for you.  I've read that some others use it. It certainly is a bargain!  Falling asleep after. It might be a sign of a feeble mind but the going to sleep part sounds good

I will let you know if I try it. It may take a while 

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

[[gi...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

You just described my brain and my biggest cognitive issue.  My writing (and thinking about writing) has improved, but I used to be quick about it. Now it takes me forever to put words on paper. How are you at spelling?  I'm terrible! If it wasn't for spell check, I'd look like an imbecile (which is what I am, but no one knows b/c of spellcheck!). Speaking - holding a conversation in a group especially - is laborious.  In some ways it's improved; in others, it's gotten worse.

 

If you haven't tried lumosity I urge you to do so.  At first it made my brain tingle and I'd get very anxious and then fall dead asleep after doing it (showing how out of shape my brain was).  Now, I sail right through my daily exercises. Although, when I'm given a new game, my brain tingles and I get anxious.  But it's helped a lot, especially with memory.

 

It's under $20/month. It's the best investment I've ever made.  Let me know if you try it.

 

ginger

 

I used to be quick about it too. Yes, spelling has been an issuue too. I think grammar and  punctuation are worse. Blah.

Speaking in person, don't get much practise at that but it is difficult and I'm so forgetful.

Thank you for sharing lumosity and your experience with it. I'm glad its working for you.  I've read that some others use it. It certainly is a bargain!  Falling asleep after. It might be a sign of a feeble mind but the going to sleep part sounds good

I will let you know if I try it. It may take a while 

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

 

I don't think falling asleep showed that it was feeble; rather, it was just worn out from working so hard. I don't fall asleep anymore when I do it, so that makes me hopeful that there's been some healing.  But the other issues (spelling, memory, understanding written concepts or instructions) have only gotten worse.

 

Reading is hard for me, too; I can't follow along that well.  I've been using a kindle b/c hubby gave it to me. But I can't review what I previously read, so it's really hard to enjoy a novel or use it as a reference book.

 

Do try lumosity!

 

g

[[Iw...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

You just described my brain and my biggest cognitive issue.  My writing (and thinking about writing) has improved, but I used to be quick about it. Now it takes me forever to put words on paper. How are you at spelling?  I'm terrible! If it wasn't for spell check, I'd look like an imbecile (which is what I am, but no one knows b/c of spellcheck!). Speaking - holding a conversation in a group especially - is laborious.  In some ways it's improved; in others, it's gotten worse.

 

If you haven't tried lumosity I urge you to do so.  At first it made my brain tingle and I'd get very anxious and then fall dead asleep after doing it (showing how out of shape my brain was).  Now, I sail right through my daily exercises. Although, when I'm given a new game, my brain tingles and I get anxious.  But it's helped a lot, especially with memory.

 

It's under $20/month. It's the best investment I've ever made.  Let me know if you try it.

 

ginger

 

I used to be quick about it too. Yes, spelling has been an issuue too. I think grammar and  punctuation are worse. Blah.

Speaking in person, don't get much practise at that but it is difficult and I'm so forgetful.

Thank you for sharing lumosity and your experience with it. I'm glad its working for you.  I've read that some others use it. It certainly is a bargain!  Falling asleep after. It might be a sign of a feeble mind but the going to sleep part sounds good

I will let you know if I try it. It may take a while 

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

 

I don't think falling asleep showed that it was feeble; rather, it was just worn out from working so hard. I don't fall asleep anymore when I do it, so that makes me hopeful that there's been some healing.  But the other issues (spelling, memory, understanding written concepts or instructions) have only gotten worse.

 

Reading is hard for me, too; I can't follow along that well.  I've been using a kindle b/c hubby gave it to me. But I can't review what I previously read, so it's really hard to enjoy a novel or use it as a reference book.

 

Do try lumosity!

 

g

 

I checked into lumosity. It is something I'm definitely interested in. I'm a little concerned about the reviews though, a lot of bad ones for terrible customer service, not allowing cancellations and billing credit cards (repeat billing too) when they aren't supposed to. there were other complaints too. Have you had any problems? After reading those reviews I wouldn't want to use my cc or bank card but thought about a prepaid cc. Did some searches for the free games and found a nice site that offers a bunch of those. I can pm you the link if your interested. Don't think they offer progress reports though. It lists some games for different areas you want to work your brain. Not sure if the games are as good as lumosity. I played, Tetris. it supposed to be good for Thinking Speed: Visual perception, information processing, spatial orientation. It tired my brain but everything does

I need to be able to view what I previously read too. articles, stories and find it hard to read so don't do to much. also here, posts, comments ,pm's,  ect.

 

[[pr...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

but this is a really good post! so you did very well typing your thoughts out. i get like this too. that's good that

the outer vibration and trembling is now gone. i try to focus on the symptoms that are now gone. hard to do though.

 

I'm glad you thought it was a good post and in more than one way. I focus and am thankful everyday for the symptoms that have left or are less. The thinking thing, communicating has been a problem thats been with me a long time it  is constant but varies. Its getting worse but it will improve, like now its still difficult but I'm doing it. I would like to say more but its enough.

Pretty, I'm amazed at how I'm doing now. There was so much Anxiety,fear for so long I wondered if it would ever get better and it did! And the vibrations and trembling also weakness, gone. There is so much. I'm getting out now too. I'm not driving but go for rides close to home and made to a mini mart recently. Went in too!  I was completely housebound. Reminds me. Need to update my agoraphobia thread.

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

iwant,

 

i'm so glad that the anxiety, fear, vibrations and trembling is gone for you and that you're getting out! i'm still in pretty bad shape and just waiting for the next window. i'm sure there are a lot of things that are better for me, but some symptoms seem pretty severe. some news symptoms too. but overall, i guess i'm better. the undulating and inner vibrations is dying down a bit and they both were present all the time for about 19 month straight. they're still there but dying down.

 

hey, i though luminosity was a free brain games website? i was thinking of going on there and checking it out.

 

keep up the good healing work

 

love. pretty

[[Ma...]]

Hey guys, have a question: I was going about withdrawal with the usual suspects but functioning alright, then this most recent wave seems to have brought back some sensitivity. I'm still in this wave. I'm concerned that practicing avoidance will cement the problems.... what is the best way to deal with this so that it passes quickly? Anyone know?

m

[[gi...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

You just described my brain and my biggest cognitive issue.  My writing (and thinking about writing) has improved, but I used to be quick about it. Now it takes me forever to put words on paper. How are you at spelling?  I'm terrible! If it wasn't for spell check, I'd look like an imbecile (which is what I am, but no one knows b/c of spellcheck!). Speaking - holding a conversation in a group especially - is laborious.  In some ways it's improved; in others, it's gotten worse.

 

If you haven't tried lumosity I urge you to do so.  At first it made my brain tingle and I'd get very anxious and then fall dead asleep after doing it (showing how out of shape my brain was).  Now, I sail right through my daily exercises. Although, when I'm given a new game, my brain tingles and I get anxious.  But it's helped a lot, especially with memory.

 

It's under $20/month. It's the best investment I've ever made.  Let me know if you try it.

 

ginger

 

I used to be quick about it too. Yes, spelling has been an issuue too. I think grammar and  punctuation are worse. Blah.

Speaking in person, don't get much practise at that but it is difficult and I'm so forgetful.

Thank you for sharing lumosity and your experience with it. I'm glad its working for you.  I've read that some others use it. It certainly is a bargain!  Falling asleep after. It might be a sign of a feeble mind but the going to sleep part sounds good

I will let you know if I try it. It may take a while 

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

 

I don't think falling asleep showed that it was feeble; rather, it was just worn out from working so hard. I don't fall asleep anymore when I do it, so that makes me hopeful that there's been some healing.  But the other issues (spelling, memory, understanding written concepts or instructions) have only gotten worse.

 

Reading is hard for me, too; I can't follow along that well.  I've been using a kindle b/c hubby gave it to me. But I can't review what I previously read, so it's really hard to enjoy a novel or use it as a reference book.

 

Do try lumosity!

 

g

 

I checked into lumosity. It is something I'm definitely interested in. I'm a little concerned about the reviews though, a lot of bad ones for terrible customer service, not allowing cancellations and billing credit cards (repeat billing too) when they aren't supposed to. there were other complaints too. Have you had any problems? After reading those reviews I wouldn't want to use my cc or bank card but thought about a prepaid cc. Did some searches for the free games and found a nice site that offers a bunch of those. I can pm you the link if your interested. Don't think they offer progress reports though. It lists some games for different areas you want to work your brain. Not sure if the games are as good as lumosity. I played, Tetris. it supposed to be good for Thinking Speed: Visual perception, information processing, spatial orientation. It tired my brain but everything does

I need to be able to view what I previously read too. articles, stories and find it hard to read so don't do to much. also here, posts, comments ,pm's,  ect.

 

The only problem I've ever had w/lumosity is my OS and theirs sometimes don't work together, causing some of the games to freeze. I contacted them about it and they were very prompt getting back to me.  I've never cancelled my account so I can't confirm that they keep dinging your account when they shouldn't.

 

Any brain games are good and I know of several sites that offer them for free. I signed up for one that said it doesn't share my account info but got slammed with so much spam immediately following signing up that I know it was due to them.  I haven't had that experience w/lumosity.  I like the progress reports; they also show how you measure up to people within your age group. While that was initially disturbing & depressing, I'm now very happy at how high up the percentile I am.

 

Anything you do for your brain; crosswords, other puzzles, multi-tasking, etc., is good.  Video games are good but it's important to do "hard copy" exercises that require handwriting, physical manipulation (like puzzles and crafts) as well. 

 

This is advice for all aging adults (and who isn't?) not just for benzo damaged brains.

 

g

[[Ma...]]

Hey Ginger, sorry I'm going to re ask my question: Anyone know how to deal with suddenly surfacing sensitivities to inhalants in a wave 10 months out? I don't want to get into the slippery slope of avoidance, but I want this to pass as quickly and painlessly as possible. Any advice?

[[ci...]]

Hey Ginger, sorry I'm going to re ask my question: Anyone know how to deal with suddenly surfacing sensitivities to inhalants in a wave 10 months out? I don't want to get into the slippery slope of avoidance, but I want this to pass as quickly and painlessly as possible. Any advice?

 

Inhalants?  Like perfumes and sprays?  They make carbon embedded face masks (like doctors wear) that are supposed to help reduce odors and VOCs (volatile organic compounds).  Prettydaisys has had the same issue.

[[Ma...]]

Think I might just suffer till it passes

[[Iw...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

You just described my brain and my biggest cognitive issue.  My writing (and thinking about writing) has improved, but I used to be quick about it. Now it takes me forever to put words on paper. How are you at spelling?  I'm terrible! If it wasn't for spell check, I'd look like an imbecile (which is what I am, but no one knows b/c of spellcheck!). Speaking - holding a conversation in a group especially - is laborious.  In some ways it's improved; in others, it's gotten worse.

 

If you haven't tried lumosity I urge you to do so.  At first it made my brain tingle and I'd get very anxious and then fall dead asleep after doing it (showing how out of shape my brain was).  Now, I sail right through my daily exercises. Although, when I'm given a new game, my brain tingles and I get anxious.  But it's helped a lot, especially with memory.

 

It's under $20/month. It's the best investment I've ever made.  Let me know if you try it.

 

ginger

 

I used to be quick about it too. Yes, spelling has been an issuue too. I think grammar and  punctuation are worse. Blah.

Speaking in person, don't get much practise at that but it is difficult and I'm so forgetful.

Thank you for sharing lumosity and your experience with it. I'm glad its working for you.  I've read that some others use it. It certainly is a bargain!  Falling asleep after. It might be a sign of a feeble mind but the going to sleep part sounds good

I will let you know if I try it. It may take a while 

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

 

I don't think falling asleep showed that it was feeble; rather, it was just worn out from working so hard. I don't fall asleep anymore when I do it, so that makes me hopeful that there's been some healing.  But the other issues (spelling, memory, understanding written concepts or instructions) have only gotten worse.

 

Reading is hard for me, too; I can't follow along that well.  I've been using a kindle b/c hubby gave it to me. But I can't review what I previously read, so it's really hard to enjoy a novel or use it as a reference book.

 

Do try lumosity!

 

g

 

I checked into lumosity. It is something I'm definitely interested in. I'm a little concerned about the reviews though, a lot of bad ones for terrible customer service, not allowing cancellations and billing credit cards (repeat billing too) when they aren't supposed to. there were other complaints too. Have you had any problems? After reading those reviews I wouldn't want to use my cc or bank card but thought about a prepaid cc. Did some searches for the free games and found a nice site that offers a bunch of those. I can pm you the link if your interested. Don't think they offer progress reports though. It lists some games for different areas you want to work your brain. Not sure if the games are as good as lumosity. I played, Tetris. it supposed to be good for Thinking Speed: Visual perception, information processing, spatial orientation. It tired my brain but everything does

I need to be able to view what I previously read too. articles, stories and find it hard to read so don't do to much. also here, posts, comments ,pm's,  ect.

 

The only problem I've ever had w/lumosity is my OS and theirs sometimes don't work together, causing some of the games to freeze. I contacted them about it and they were very prompt getting back to me.  I've never cancelled my account so I can't confirm that they keep dinging your account when they shouldn't.

 

Any brain games are good and I know of several sites that offer them for free. I signed up for one that said it doesn't share my account info but got slammed with so much spam immediately following signing up that I know it was due to them.  I haven't had that experience w/lumosity.  I like the progress reports; they also show how you measure up to people within your age group. While that was initially disturbing & depressing, I'm now very happy at how high up the percentile I am.

 

Anything you do for your brain; crosswords, other puzzles, multi-tasking, etc., is good.  Video games are good but it's important to do "hard copy" exercises that require handwriting, physical manipulation (like puzzles and crafts) as well. 

 

This is advice for all aging adults (and who isn't?) not just for benzo damaged brains.

 

g

 

The progress reports are something that make a big difference. I'm happy for you that you are seeing improvements. That's great! "Hard copy" exercises. Thanks. I've started hand writing things down in a tablet, wonder if that counts? I've noticed my handwriting changes and has improved since months ago. For a while I couldn't write fast enough, like my brain was on warp speed and my hand had a hard time keeping up. Is write super fast and it looked something like a squirrel would write. I've been contemplating starting crocheting again. It's been years but keep forgetting. I also have some word search books that I like to do and coloring books. I used to paint and draw but haven't been able to in a long time. I'm not a schooled artist, it was just for fun.

You got slammed with spam from a free site. Thanks for the warning, I don't think the one i found asked for email. I'm pretty sure i didnt give an email. I played tetris lastnight 3 or 4 times and did not do well also felt revved and some mild anxiety. I feel revved today but not sure if thats why.  I did yoga, Chakra meditation, self reiki then the tetris. Maybe did to much back to back but think it was the game. I'll try it again tomorrow and when I join lumosity I'll let you know how it goes.

 

[[gi...]]

Excellent!

I know that when I learn new things I get terrible anxiety. I think it's the whole flight-or-fight instinct kicking in because we're using our brains differently. I compared  bz brain damage being akin to muscle atrophy.  After you wear a leg brace for a long time, when you first start walking without it, the leg's all wobbly and tingly and gets worn out easily, until the muscle builds back up.  That's what happened to our gaba receptors. That's why our brains tingle and get worn out easily; it's been atrophied.

 

Keep up the good work!

 

g

[[Iw...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

but this is a really good post! so you did very well typing your thoughts out. i get like this too. that's good that

the outer vibration and trembling is now gone. i try to focus on the symptoms that are now gone. hard to do though.

 

I'm glad you thought it was a good post and in more than one way. I focus and am thankful everyday for the symptoms that have left or are less. The thinking thing, communicating has been a problem thats been with me a long time it  is constant but varies. Its getting worse but it will improve, like now its still difficult but I'm doing it. I would like to say more but its enough.

Pretty, I'm amazed at how I'm doing now. There was so much Anxiety,fear for so long I wondered if it would ever get better and it did! And the vibrations and trembling also weakness, gone. There is so much. I'm getting out now too. I'm not driving but go for rides close to home and made to a mini mart recently. Went in too!  I was completely housebound. Reminds me. Need to update my agoraphobia thread.

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

iwant,

 

i'm so glad that the anxiety, fear, vibrations and trembling is gone for you and that you're getting out! i'm still in pretty bad shape and just waiting for the next window. i'm sure there are a lot of things that are better for me, but some symptoms seem pretty severe. some news symptoms too. but overall, i guess i'm better. the undulating and inner vibrations is dying down a bit and they both were present all the time for about 19 month straight. they're still there but dying down.

 

hey, i though luminosity was a free brain games website? i was thinking of going on there and checking it out.

 

keep up the good healing work

 

love. pretty

I'pretty.

That is really good news and m happy for you that the undulating and inner vibrations are dying down. It will continue to get better.   there is a very low vibration that is hardly noticed now. It will increase from stressors but not bad.

I read that there were some lumosity games for free but to have access to more and the progress reports you have to join. I was looking for the free games when came across a site with a bunch of free games. If you want I can pm you the link. I still want to join lumosity but after reading negative reviews mainly about customer service and auto payments. I'm going to get a pre paid credit card.

Ginger said she hasnt had any problems with them.

 

You keep up the good healing work!

[[Iw...]]

Excellent!

I know that when I learn new things I get terrible anxiety. I think it's the whole flight-or-fight instinct kicking in because we're using our brains differently. I compared  bz brain damage being akin to muscle atrophy.  After you wear a leg brace for a long time, when you first start walking without it, the leg's all wobbly and tingly and gets worn out easily, until the muscle builds back up.  That's what happened to our gaba receptors. That's why our brains tingle and get worn out easily; it's been atrophied.

 

Keep up the good work!

 

g

 

That's an interesting comparison! I shattered an ankle many years ago and it did take some time to get it strong. It's actuall stronger than the uninjured one now, I did my physical therapy. That's what these brain games are. It is uncomfortable and getting this break in Anxiety that is still fresh, it was alarming and scary but it wasn't the same anxiety. I'm not doing any games tonight but tomorrow I'lldo again. I play hello kitty and word search on my phone but dont feel what the tetris made me feel. I guess its working on different areas.

 

Did it take you long before improvements showed and when did the sensations and anxiety stop with the training?

[[Iw...]]

Marina. Is your breathing effected by inhalants? I'm sensitive to chemicals, scents, ect  and my breathing is effected. (my chest is always tight anyways)  I use ice and moist heat front and back and it helps a lot. Found out about doing the ice and heat from an angel BB when the stomach acid was causing increase breathing problems and thought I had a bad respiratory infection.

[[pr...]]

Is it ever hard for you to think? Mostly, making  comments on here is extremely difficult. . I'll stare and try to think of the words but find I'm unable to gather them or I'll have the words but am unable to put them into words. I'm better in person but writing my thoughts is so difficult. It can take hours. This improves for a couple of hours, not much  and my mind tires very easily. Feel like I'm in a spaced out all the time and like I'm in a dream. Memories also seem like dreams.

My head is very congested feeling, I'm wondering if that comes with it and if its inflammation.

 

On the positive side. The anxiety has subsided mostly. It's like a hum. The nervousness is low too as is the inner vibrations. The outer vibrations and trembling are gone. Depression is less often and less when its present.

This has been hard to write and took way to long.

 

Hope everyone is feeling well. 

 

but this is a really good post! so you did very well typing your thoughts out. i get like this too. that's good that

the outer vibration and trembling is now gone. i try to focus on the symptoms that are now gone. hard to do though.

 

I'm glad you thought it was a good post and in more than one way. I focus and am thankful everyday for the symptoms that have left or are less. The thinking thing, communicating has been a problem thats been with me a long time it  is constant but varies. Its getting worse but it will improve, like now its still difficult but I'm doing it. I would like to say more but its enough.

Pretty, I'm amazed at how I'm doing now. There was so much Anxiety,fear for so long I wondered if it would ever get better and it did! And the vibrations and trembling also weakness, gone. There is so much. I'm getting out now too. I'm not driving but go for rides close to home and made to a mini mart recently. Went in too!  I was completely housebound. Reminds me. Need to update my agoraphobia thread.

 

Healing thoughts to you 

 

iwant,

 

i'm so glad that the anxiety, fear, vibrations and trembling is gone for you and that you're getting out! i'm still in pretty bad shape and just waiting for the next window. i'm sure there are a lot of things that are better for me, but some symptoms seem pretty severe. some news symptoms too. but overall, i guess i'm better. the undulating and inner vibrations is dying down a bit and they both were present all the time for about 19 month straight. they're still there but dying down.

 

hey, i though luminosity was a free brain games website? i was thinking of going on there and checking it out.

 

keep up the good healing work

 

love. pretty

I'pretty.

That is really good news and m happy for you that the undulating and inner vibrations are dying down. It will continue to get better.   there is a very low vibration that is hardly noticed now. It will increase from stressors but not bad.

I read that there were some lumosity games for free but to have access to more and the progress reports you have to join. I was looking for the free games when came across a site with a bunch of free games. If you want I can pm you the link. I still want to join lumosity but after reading negative reviews mainly about customer service and auto payments. I'm going to get a pre paid credit card.

Ginger said she hasnt had any problems with them.

 

You keep up the good healing work!

 

yes you can send me the link in a PM. i have suffered with MCS for over ten years. i think mostly from withdrawal because there are times when it's not as bad.

[[Ma...]]

Pretty

I have it on very good authority, a doctor who has been treating MCS for around 30 years, that we have is not MCS. She calls it mcs, because it looks like it but MCS does not come and go. She apologized for misdiagnosing me 15 years ago and told me not to worry, that it would go away. I believe her. It's also terrible for us to think of it in those terms, it only frightens us and makes things worse. I have been living completely normally for the last year, and now suddenly I'm in a sensitivities wave, that is NOT MCS, it is withdrawal. I have known people with real MCS. It does not come and go the way it does for us. The DNR (you know what I mean, I forget the letters) is helpful, but the most important part I think is to understand what's happening and not get sucked into the fear that this is some other disease. It's not. I did not have sensitivities before the drugs. So I know what it is for me. If you did, well, then this is making it worse but things will settle back down to whatever level they were at before. I'm hoping that this is just a wave for me and a return of symptoms cause the sensitivities are pesky and often the last symptoms to go and they make life a drag (I LOVE my perfume  ). What I do know about them for sure, is that often the fear of them is more than half the battle.

That's why I NEVER talk about them, except more recently when I got scared like a fool, but it's very very bad for me. It's never good to dwell on symptoms, which is why I try so hard not to, but this wave threw me for such a loop, I needed some support. Again, I do not have MCS, from what you've said, it sounds as through you don't either, we just suffer waves of sensitivities during withdrawal and truly, that is not at all the same thing. Sadly, I was diagnosed with it and lived years of pain and isolation, so PTSD in relationship to these symptoms isn't an unlikely bet, which is why I need to stay calm and never ever allow myself to think in those terms.

I hope this was helpful.

m

[[gi...]]

Excellent!

I know that when I learn new things I get terrible anxiety. I think it's the whole flight-or-fight instinct kicking in because we're using our brains differently. I compared  bz brain damage being akin to muscle atrophy.  After you wear a leg brace for a long time, when you first start walking without it, the leg's all wobbly and tingly and gets worn out easily, until the muscle builds back up.  That's what happened to our gaba receptors. That's why our brains tingle and get worn out easily; it's been atrophied.

 

Keep up the good work!

 

g

 

That's an interesting comparison! I shattered an ankle many years ago and it did take some time to get it strong. It's actuall stronger than the uninjured one now, I did my physical therapy. That's what these brain games are. It is uncomfortable and getting this break in Anxiety that is still fresh, it was alarming and scary but it wasn't the same anxiety. I'm not doing any games tonight but tomorrow I'lldo again. I play hello kitty and word search on my phone but dont feel what the tetris made me feel. I guess its working on different areas.

 

Did it take you long before improvements showed and when did the sensations and anxiety stop with the training?

 

In some areas, it took a couple months to improve. In others, longer.  I still get anxious when certain games come up, but I power through all my anxiety attacks.  Some days I do worse at some games, some days I do better. I've yet to figure out what makes me better or worse on any given day, but other than sleep quality, I can't figure it out. Oh! Except one time, recently! I ate a whole bunch of candy - I was flying I was so high on the stuff. Then I couldn't do any games, at all.  I had no hand/eye coordination, I couldn't follow instructions, I was just totally shut down.  But I never eat like that usually.

[[pr...]]

Pretty

I have it on very good authority, a doctor who has been treating MCS for around 30 years, that we have is not MCS. She calls it mcs, because it looks like it but MCS does not come and go. She apologized for misdiagnosing me 15 years ago and told me not to worry, that it would go away. I believe her. It's also terrible for us to think of it in those terms, it only frightens us and makes things worse. I have been living completely normally for the last year, and now suddenly I'm in a sensitivities wave, that is NOT MCS, it is withdrawal. I have known people with real MCS. It does not come and go the way it does for us. The DNR (you know what I mean, I forget the letters) is helpful, but the most important part I think is to understand what's happening and not get sucked into the fear that this is some other disease. It's not. I did not have sensitivities before the drugs. So I know what it is for me. If you did, well, then this is making it worse but things will settle back down to whatever level they were at before. I'm hoping that this is just a wave for me and a return of symptoms cause the sensitivities are pesky and often the last symptoms to go and they make life a drag (I LOVE my perfume  ). What I do know about them for sure, is that often the fear of them is more than half the battle.

That's why I NEVER talk about them, except more recently when I got scared like a fool, but it's very very bad for me. It's never good to dwell on symptoms, which is why I try so hard not to, but this wave threw me for such a loop, I needed some support. Again, I do not have MCS, from what you've said, it sounds as through you don't either, we just suffer waves of sensitivities during withdrawal and truly, that is not at all the same thing. Sadly, I was diagnosed with it and lived years of pain and isolation, so PTSD in relationship to these symptoms isn't an unlikely bet, which is why I need to stay calm and never ever allow myself to think in those terms.

I hope this was helpful.

m

 

m,

 

oh, this is where i find your post. i wasn't sure when i posted on ihope's blog but now i know.

 

well, a few things confused me and here they are for you to help me figure this out possibly.?? when i was benzo free the first time those 7 years from 1995-2002 i started to become chemically sensitive right away so that was withdrawals. yes i agree it was. but then around the 3rd year i was benzo free that first time--i started to notice that i was becoming more and more sensitive to chemicals, perfume, care fumes, smoke, laundry detergents, and other skin care lotions that had fragrance. so mostly to "fragrance" and that kinda started when i recorded my first record in this studio that definitely had black mold and some people who do have MCS have told me that MCS can definitely come from being exposed to black mold. or, i could have been in "protracted withdrawals" during that time that i didn't know about.

 

but, the thing is now it does come and go. i'm definitely not as sensitive when i am not in a revved up wave even though i still can smell odor's that most times other do not detect unless they are told 'hey, do you smell that?"

 

so i am kinda unsure about myself? but for you, it's probably all withdrawal and will pass when you're done with this wave. who know's, maybe it will for me too. by the way, i think John Sarno and his theory's are excellent. i've read his book "Healing Back Pain" and i also think the MCS could possibly be more on the emotional spector of things and definitely when the body has energy blocks from emotional and physical trauma. all that usually needs to be done is integrate the trauma and the blocks dissappear. i use to also think this way about benzo withdrawal and for the most part i do think a lot of energy blocks need to be vibrated out but this benzo withdrawal really blows my mind with how the waves just randomly come into existence.

 

those darn gaba and that darn glutamate

 

we won't stop until we 100% good!

 

love, pretty

[[Ma...]]

My new coach is with Sarno. I met him years ago and went from being terribly sensitive to not, even in Ativan withdrawal. I think it's possible that the sensitivities begin as withdrawal and then, for some, become a TMS equivalent, which is wonderful news really. I know Sarno believes MCS is a TMS equivalent. It is believed now that it's origin is in the limbic as you know, withdrawal certainly disturbs the limbic, and some people get stuck. But it's easy to come out if that's the case, as in coming from withdrawal, it was for me and I'm just not that special. Perfume is EASY to get over. I used a stop watch. Went into stinky areas for 10 seconds, which would bring on a little something. Then I'd go back for 12, I kid you not. Eventually I'd be upping it in 1 minute then 2, 3, 10 minute intervals. In no time I was at a perfume counter for two hours testing stuff. You could try it and I know you'll have some success. It will certainly broaden things for you. I don't know how the withdrawal you're currently going through will affect this. One thing I do know though, I was considered one of the worst of the worst with MCS, and two summers ago I was sitting in the hot sun in a parking lot with 20 other people taking a motorcycle course... I knew people with MCS and they never ever could have done that. My MCS was learned though. I got diagnosed in a community. I didn't have anywhere near the problems I eventually had after hearing about them, and that's a fact. As for the people I knew with MCS who are 12 years later still not living normal lives, they accepted the physicality of their diagnosis, retained the fear and as a result, never really believed they could challenge it. My advice would be to start working on the fear now, know that this will pass, that you will have your life back, that you're taking it in stages. 10 months off now, I feel like I'm ready to do some work, I wouldn't have if this wave hadn't hit and the cumulative fear of the last 20 years hadn't hit me in the face. Well, you know Sarno's message, the central theme, think emotional not physical, so this is the last of the symptom talk or MCS talk for me. Even typing it I know it's not healthy (and I do not believe I have MCS whatever it is, and I do not believe you have it either).

So, I my appointment is at two and I thought I'd come on here one last time, say ciao for now and I hope something I said was of use to you. MCS is devastating. Believe me, I know. I got diagnosed in Texas and man, what I saw, and eventually became. Think back to how things progressed for you. No need to post it, I won't be around to read it I'm afraid, but the perfume and other sensitivities do happen for people in withdrawal rather commonly, and then they go, I've seen it. If I had never heard of anything else, I wonder if my symptoms would have progressed as they did. Once I was diagnosed, I was a goner.

It's going to be ok Pretty. But first you have to start believing it, and start following the protocol. Last night, I was in bed with all kinds of awful symptoms. I started doing the Sarno work and 90% of them went away and I cried with relief. I'm not so sure about a lot of this BW business either anymore. It starts out real for sure, but then TMS might just jump on board, at least to some degree.

 

Don't be afraid.

Sorry for the long post

xxm

[[pr...]]

My new coach is with Sarno. I met him years ago and went from being terribly sensitive to not, even in Ativan withdrawal. I think it's possible that the sensitivities begin as withdrawal and then, for some, become a TMS equivalent, which is wonderful news really. I know Sarno believes MCS is a TMS equivalent. It is believed now that it's origin is in the limbic as you know, withdrawal certainly disturbs the limbic, and some people get stuck. But it's easy to come out if that's the case, as in coming from withdrawal, it was for me and I'm just not that special. Perfume is EASY to get over. I used a stop watch. Went into stinky areas for 10 seconds, which would bring on a little something. Then I'd go back for 12, I kid you not. Eventually I'd be upping it in 1 minute then 2, 3, 10 minute intervals. In no time I was at a perfume counter for two hours testing stuff. You could try it and I know you'll have some success. It will certainly broaden things for you. I don't know how the withdrawal you're currently going through will affect this. One thing I do know though, I was considered one of the worst of the worst with MCS, and two summers ago I was sitting in the hot sun in a parking lot with 20 other people taking a motorcycle course... I knew people with MCS and they never ever could have done that. My MCS was learned though. I got diagnosed in a community. I didn't have anywhere near the problems I eventually had after hearing about them, and that's a fact. As for the people I knew with MCS who are 12 years later still not living normal lives, they accepted the physicality of their diagnosis, retained the fear and as a result, never really believed they could challenge it. My advice would be to start working on the fear now, know that this will pass, that you will have your life back, that you're taking it in stages. 10 months off now, I feel like I'm ready to do some work, I wouldn't have if this wave hadn't hit and the cumulative fear of the last 20 years hadn't hit me in the face. Well, you know Sarno's message, the central theme, think emotional not physical, so this is the last of the symptom talk or MCS talk for me. Even typing it I know it's not healthy (and I do not believe I have MCS whatever it is, and I do not believe you have it either).

So, I my appointment is at two and I thought I'd come on here one last time, say ciao for now and I hope something I said was of use to you. MCS is devastating. Believe me, I know. I got diagnosed in Texas and man, what I saw, and eventually became. Think back to how things progressed for you. No need to post it, I won't be around to read it I'm afraid, but the perfume and other sensitivities do happen for people in withdrawal rather commonly, and then they go, I've seen it. If I had never heard of anything else, I wonder if my symptoms would have progressed as they did. Once I was diagnosed, I was a goner.

It's going to be ok Pretty. But first you have to start believing it, and start following the protocol. Last night, I was in bed with all kinds of awful symptoms. I started doing the Sarno work and 90% of them went away and I cried with relief. I'm not so sure about a lot of this BW business either anymore. It starts out real for sure, but then TMS might just jump on board, at least to some degree.

 

Don't be afraid.

Sorry for the long post

xxm

 

m,

 

well, if you ever do come back to read this post. just a few things. firstly, i really like Sarno's theory's so i'm interested in how you 'do his work?" i'll have to re-read his books again as it's been a long time. i have no doubt that i will get over all these sensitivitites to perfumes and chemicals and that it's mostly emotional and limbic work but for now, i am a green girl and quite like the fact that i have managed to find many beautiful products, skin care products, cleaning products that are all green and effective and do not disrupt hormones. i am a skin care therapist and esthetician so have many recources... i know you want to go back to your perfum but i don't have any use for it as i am in love with the essential oils of rose, lavender, frankincense, sandalwood and the like...

 

but yes, and life will be much more broader, wider and bigger when we're not chemically sensitive and most of it is from down regulated gaba's and excess glutamate so when that's all nice & balanced the World will be big again and look much brighter!

[[Iw...]]

Excellent!

I know that when I learn new things I get terrible anxiety. I think it's the whole flight-or-fight instinct kicking in because we're using our brains differently. I compared  bz brain damage being akin to muscle atrophy.  After you wear a leg brace for a long time, when you first start walking without it, the leg's all wobbly and tingly and gets worn out easily, until the muscle builds back up.  That's what happened to our gaba receptors. That's why our brains tingle and get worn out easily; it's been atrophied.

 

Keep up the good work!

 

g

 

That's an interesting comparison! I shattered an ankle many years ago and it did take some time to get it strong. It's actuall stronger than the uninjured one now, I did my physical therapy. That's what these brain games are. It is uncomfortable and getting this break in Anxiety that is still fresh, it was alarming and scary but it wasn't the same anxiety. I'm not doing any games tonight but tomorrow I'lldo again. I play hello kitty and word search on my phone but dont feel what the tetris made me feel. I guess its working on different areas.

 

Did it take you long before improvements showed and when did the sensations and anxiety stop with the training?

 

In some areas, it took a couple months to improve. In others, longer.  I still get anxious when certain games come up, but I power through all my anxiety attacks.  Some days I do worse at some games, some days I do better. I've yet to figure out what makes me better or worse on any given day, but other than sleep quality, I can't figure it out. Oh! Except one time, recently! I ate a whole bunch of candy - I was flying I was so high on the stuff. Then I couldn't do any games, at all.  I had no hand/eye coordination, I couldn't follow instructions, I was just totally shut down.  But I never eat like that usually.

 

Candy! that will do it! oh, candy. I'd love to have some chocolate, yum! I'm waiting to do any games for a week or two. I need to enjoy the break in anxiety, we never know what's lurking around the corner and I get revved up so easily but I'm not giving up on the games just taking it slow and letting my mind and body settle some from the long haul of anxiety and make adjustments.

We'll be able to have candy again and actually go about normally.

 

[[Iw...]]

That is really good news and m happy for you that the undulating and inner vibrations are dying down. It will continue to get better.   there is a very low vibration that is hardly noticed now. It will increase from stressors but not bad.

I read that there were some lumosity games for free but to have access to more and the progress reports you have to join. I was looking for the free games when came across a site with a bunch of free games. If you want I can pm you the link. I still want to join lumosity but after reading negative reviews mainly about customer service and auto payments. I'm going to get a pre paid credit card.

Ginger said she hasnt had any problems with them.

 

You keep up the good healing work!

 

yes you can send me the link in a PM. i have suffered with MCS for over ten years. i think mostly from withdrawal because there are times when it's not as bad.

 

Pretty, I'm on my way to send you that link.

MCS don't know what the initials stand for but I am very sensitive to scents, for me it's probably withdrawal. I've had sensitivities for years that progressively got worse, other allergies too but I also have a long benzo history and this last time the allergies and sensitivities got really bad and started having asthma.

On my way to PM~

[[pr...]]

That is really good news and m happy for you that the undulating and inner vibrations are dying down. It will continue to get better.   there is a very low vibration that is hardly noticed now. It will increase from stressors but not bad.

I read that there were some lumosity games for free but to have access to more and the progress reports you have to join. I was looking for the free games when came across a site with a bunch of free games. If you want I can pm you the link. I still want to join lumosity but after reading negative reviews mainly about customer service and auto payments. I'm going to get a pre paid credit card.

Ginger said she hasnt had any problems with them.

 

You keep up the good healing work!

 

yes you can send me the link in a PM. i have suffered with MCS for over ten years. i think mostly from withdrawal because there are times when it's not as bad.

 

Pretty, I'm on my way to send you that link.

MCS don't know what the initials stand for but I am very sensitive to scents, for me it's probably withdrawal. I've had sensitivities for years that progressively got worse, other allergies too but I also have a long benzo history and this last time the allergies and sensitivities got really bad and started having asthma.

On my way to PM~

 

it does stand for multiple chemical sensitivites. i may have both from withdrawal and i did have a phase 1 & 2 liver test done which people with MCS usually have done to see how the phase 1 & 2 detoxification process are working and my phase 2 is not working so well--so i will have to do things to help detoxify my liver and body when i am through the revving part of withdrawal and when my brain is more healed from this benzo assault.

 

i got your PM, haven't had a chance to look at the link yet but i will. i am still really bad off revved up wave that is making it very difficult to keep going on. but i am trudging to say the least.

 

thank you, pretty

[[ve...]]

Hope all the post benzo warriors are surviving the brutal cold, ice and snow if you are in the South or Northeast part of the USA.  Finally starting to melt here.  I've heard from a buddy in the UK that it's been pretty wet there too.

 

Take care,

 

V

[[ve...]]

Any new buddies who have recently tapered off the benzo?