Dying

[[ea...]]

Misty, I feel for you. I was just like that.

Long term: what I found when I researched this was that it would not kill me, but it would make me feel like crap. Those micro sleeps protect you, prevent cell death, believe it or not. When a person doesn't get normal sleep, it can affect their immune system, leaving you more likely to get viruses. There is no proof that lack of sleep leads one to cancer, or any other horrible disease. If a person has heart disease, lack of sleep can lead to more heart troubles. If a person has hypetension, lack of sleep can lead to higher BP readings in some people. Lack of sleep can cause problems, yes, but it will not kill you.

Is there someone who could drive you to the store? Do you work, and have to drive to work?

 

31 weeks is only one month. In the world of benzo withdrawal, you are still in acute withdrawal....which is usually the worst period for symptoms. Most people start to feel better after the acute phase, so its possible you will start sleeping more soon. I did not, but my story is quite different from yours, and I don't want you to compare.

east

[[Si...]]

So I went to see a psychiatrist at the VA regarding my withdrawal symptoms.  They tapered me off of Avitan in 3 weeks after taking 2 mg for over 6 years.  My last dose was last Wednesday. She did not want to put me back on Avian to taper over a longer period.  She prescribed hydroxyzine 50 mg at bedtime along with mirtazapine 15 mg. Both of these meds have antihistamine characteristics and I know that Benadryl really dries my mucous membranes on a half dose.  Sigh....I will try it and see of it helps.

 

This forum is amazing.  It is reassuring that I am not alone and it is reassuring to reads progresses and success stories.  Thank you everyone.

 

I took Hydroxyzine also and I think it helped take the edge off. It did not help me sleep at all though. I have a paradoxical reaction to most antihistamines. They totally wire me. I would have probably stayed on it longer than the 10 days or so I did take it. My biggest tip while on it is to just drink a ton of water. I got some water bottles and ice with lemon and would drink a sip every few minutes. I'd usually drink 4 or 5 quarts a day at least. Sometimes I'd make decaf green tea with no sugar. Sorry they dropped you from the amount they did. Hope you feel better soon.

[[Ma...]]

Getting off xanax was the hardest thing I have ever done.  I had many sleepless nights after stopping and was in tears many times because I could not sleep. I lost confidence and got depressed. I still worked throughout this albeit not very productively.  I obsessed about sleep. As hard as it may seem you cannot obsess about sleep.  Set a block of time for sleep. For example midnight to 6. If during that block of sleep you are awke, get out of bed and go to another room for a Hal fhour and then back to bed.  Retrain yourself to sleep.  No naps during the day.  This is what the experts will tell you to do.  No pills, no vitamins, no magic potion.  Retrain yourself to sleep as you have gotten all out of wack.  Read JITTERYs posts. 

[[Ma...]]

By the way this took me about one year and a half to start to sleep normally.

[[Mi...]]

I think I am having such a rough time because this is my third time on benzos. First time off, no problem. Second time, moderate problems. And now, third time--hell.

 

East, I am 31 weeks out, not days, so I am at almost 8 months. Shouldn't I be out of acute?

 

[[bn...]]

I too had a break-down after 18 days with little sleep. Micro sleep as Misty puts it. I was admitted to the local mental ward. I was hallucinating and hearing voices. I have never been suicidal before, nor had any mental issue's other than a few panic attacks.

The insomnia has been debilitating.

So, i only suggest that Misty does not let it get out of control...meaning suicidal, or hallucinating.

They gave me benzo's at the hospital.....and a huge bill that I now have to pay.

no easy answers.

[[Mi...]]

Took two Benadryl. Slept four hours, woke up and then dozed for a couple more. My body is saying sleep, I need more sleep.

[[Ra...]]

Misty,

 

So night 5 without Ativan.  I was prescribed Remeron 15 mg when I started the taper.  Remeron is a sedating antidepressant and I have been getting about 2 - 3 hours of interrupted sleep and bad dreams.  I was prescribed Hydroxyzine (Atarax) an antihistamine that has proven to help with anxiety and withdrawal symptoms.  I have slept some what fitfully all night and I feel strange.  I am going to stay the course.  My personal trainer is working with me as well.  She wants me to come in regardless of my energy level.  We did an easy workout and walking on a treadmill.  I really miss the Ativan/Ambien combo I was on but know it was not good for me .  Hang in there...we are strong and we will have our success stories posted here  .

[Guest [ba...]]

Took two Benadryl. Slept four hours, woke up and then dozed for a couple more.

 

I think that could be considered improvement. 

[[...]]

Misty!  Yea for Benadryl!  Hope that continues to help.  I am really happy for you.  It's amazing isn't it? when we are grateful for just a few hours of sleep?  This is the way of it.  Whatever helps your body get back on track, that's what I'm for.  They always say the more you sleep the more you sleep.  Get horizontal as often as possible for now--that's my advice.

[[bn...]]

yeah for sleep! Your not dying 

[[ea...]]

That's good news, misty. But be warned that Benedryl loses its sedating abilities fairly quickly. It might work for a month, maybe more, but eventually it will stop working.

Hopefully by then, your nervous system will have balanced itself enough to sleep normally.

east

[[Mi...]]

Well, Benadryl didn't work last night. That's what usually happens to me. OTC aids won't work for more than one night in a row. Back to despair.

[[ea...]]

Aw, hon, I know the feeling. OTCs never worked for me either, and I spent a small fortune on them. Try not to despair, because eventually your normal sleep will return. It helps if you have a plan in place for what to do when you cant sleep, plus make a bedtime routine. You might do some reading on "sleep hygiene," because many of the suggestions are very useful. You just have to pick and choose between the ideas and use what works for you. I found that having a routine bedtime helped, and not doing anything stimuplating for a couple hours before bed. I stop drinking anything with caffeine at 2 pm. I take a warm shower in the evening, get into comfy clothes. I always eat a high carb snack (usually cereal with milk). I make my bed as comfortable and inviting as I can, and I don't use the bed for anything but sleep (no sex in the picture right now....   ). If I cannot go to sleep I listen to sleep hypnosis videos on YouTube or I read something not very exciting. Doing these things over time has seemed to help me a lot. But most important, I have learned not to panic when sleep doesn't come, or sleep isn't good! I will survive a bad nights sleep(or hardly any sleep!)

east

[[Sw...]]

Sleep is really the key to feeling better so I understand what Misty93 is saying.  I was given clonazepam for sleep in 2008 and the dose was increased twice.  Now I haven't had any clonazepam in 4 months sleep is still elusive.  A great night is 5 hours broken sleep.  At one month out it was sleep for 1 to 1 1/2 hours and wake up with a anxiety jolt with a BP of 160/100 and HB of 120.  (kind of makes you terrified to go to sleep)  I still have that sleep fear about the anxiety jolt but have not had the jolt for about two weeks.  Misty93, I agree with others that treating yourself well. I have tried magnesium which does have somewhat of a calming effect but not sleep induction.  If I stay away from the food additives, electronics and cleaning chemicals it does help.

[[Ra...]]

Hi Misty,

 

So I know this will not be a popular suggestion, but you could try a low dose Seroquel.  It's a mood stabilizer used commonly for bi-polar, but becoming more commonly prescribed off label for insomnia.  I was really at my wits end at not being able to sleep.  Everyone's tolerance for low sleep is different.  I'm an 8 hour girl, so when this all hit the fan and I started sleeping 1 to 4 hours per night, I went downhill VERY quickly.  My doc was desperate to help me.  I'm the breadwinner of my family and had been off work for 3 months, so we finally decided to try Seroquel.  It worked like a dream.  It is very sedating to most peeps and you will feel quite groggy when you first get up in the morning for a while, but from my perspective, it saved my life.  I was able to sleep and go back to work again and start my taper from Xanax. 

 

It worked miracles on my sleep and also anxiety.  Sleep isn't perfect.  I usually get a pretty good 6 hours and then some broken sleep after that.  The side effect profile is terrible, but my doc tells me the side effects are dose dependent. He said that a therapudic dose (what they would use for bi-polar) would start at 200mg.  I even looked it up on line and it says that at low doses it really only hits your histamine receptors.  So your nose will feel stuffed up when it starts to kick in.  I recommend the immediate release type rather than extended release. 

 

Please let us know how you get on. 

 

Best of luck,

 

Bunny

[[ea...]]

Thats not a bad idea, Rabbit. Some people DO sleep better on Seroquel, but some don't. (I sure didn't! And I wish it had helped.) It is a drug with side effects, so please read up on it before you ask your doctor. Some people have a withdrawal from it, as well.

 

Rabbit, I love your avatar! I am a real fan of squirrels and other rodents.

east

[[Ra...]]

East, that is true, Seroquel doesn't work for everyone, it's kind of a hit and miss kind of thing, but if at wits end, maybe worth a try. 

 

The squirrel in avatar was my pet squirrel Ruby-Rose.  I raised her from a orphaned baby at 5 weeks old and she nursed until about 16 weeks old.  She was my sweet girl    Gone from this world now, but never forgotten 

[[eg...]]

When the melatonin or Benadryl does not work I take 3.5 mg remron. I sleep but pay the next day with brain fog. Sometimes sleeping is worth the next day hangover from Remron.

My Pdoc said if I took it daily I would get used to it but I do not want to have to taper it when I am done...

[[ba...]]

after week 6 of quiting xanax i slept rather well i been using valerian root & melatonin , i sitll wake up too early after just 4 1/2 hours of sleep im awake a few hours then rest another 2 -3 hours , it was this way before i started benzos so its nothing new i think the phenytoin (dilantin) i took 9-10 years ago caused me to have sleep problems when i quit that when i was taking that i had to set my alarm 8 hours to make sure i woke up in time to take my morning dose of meds

 

i thought of dying all the time when i was taking xanax , at times i thought it would be by my own hand doing so because everything went downhill, my energy unable to work, denied disability, , i had weird dreams that worried me i worry sometimes that my parents will outlive me from my body being thru too much   i shouldnt read the obituaries everyday i often see young people there i think its bgad luck to look at that !

 

 

[[Mi...]]

Tried Vistaril again, thought it might work this time (hasn't really in the past), but no such luck. Tried to get the brand name over the generic, but the pharmacy said the brand name isn't available right now.

 

Too afraid to try Seroquel because of the side effect profile. I may have to break down and try 1 mg Lunesta. Far from ideal, but I can no longed function at home to take care of my family because the sleep deprivation is so bad.

 

Compared a picture of myself from this summer to last summer. The withdrawals have aged me 15 years easy. If this is what it has done to the outside, what is it (and especially the near total sleep deprivation) doing to us on the inside?

[Guest [ba...]]

Compared a picture of myself from this summer to last summer. The withdrawals have aged me 15 years easy.

 

Yeah, I know what you mean about feeling aged as a result of the withdrawal (sigh).

[[ea...]]

Misty,

I found that absolutely nothing worked to help me sleep for two years after getting off a benzo. I don't know a reason for this, but I suspect that my damaged receptors just wouldn't "accept" any drugs for sleep. Please be aware that Lunesta is a cousin to the benzos, and many people have a withdrawal from it. It has many of the same side effects as a benzo.

I resigned myself to having poor sleep after trying every possible over the counter sleep drug, Seroquel, Remeron, and even Ambien (briefly!) Nothing helped, except my learning the rules of good sleep hygiene and actually practicing them. Its been 26 months now and I STILL don't sleep well, but its slowly improving. Learning those few simple tricks for sleep have definitely helped me. (I do slow deep breathing when I first lie down, and often listen to sleep hypnosis videos on YouTube, amongst other things-)

east

[[Mi...]]

East, that's how I feel: that my receptors won't or can't accept any drug for sleep right now. I don't know why I was able to sleep on my own about six weeks ago. Soooooo frustrating!

[[ea...]]

It sure is frustrating. What I have learned is that not sleeping much will not kill you (even though it feels that way!)

This is because of those "micro sleeps" you are having, whether you are aware of them or not. Ill give you an example:

 

Last night, I slept fairly well, but I woke four times, which is my normal now. I was exhausted when I hauled myself out of bed at 5 am. I went ahead and made coffee, and started my day, but at 7 am I gave up and lay down on my bed. I didn't FEEL as if I slept during the next hour, but I MUST have because it felt like only 10 minutes and I was shocked when I read the actual time. Micro sleeps were happening during that hour, and it did give me a bit more rest.

 

Misty, do read a few things about sleep hygiene. (I hate that name, it sounds so cold and clinical!) Many of the suggestions are easy to do, and they truly do work.

east