The jumping buddies group

[[Be...]]

Hi guys,

 

I feel like that penguin this week. Dropped a dozen eggs, then a can of chick peas, and burned the pan I forgot on the stove. 

 

Fifth week out was a noticeable improvement. Into the sixth week as of tomorrow and most systems no-go. Right top of head weirdness and lots of left side body tingling and crazy inner vibration. Not a happy penguin!

 

Anyone else want to check in? Anyone with good news?

 

Bennie

[[Ki...]]

Hello everyone,

 

I'll check in.

I had three pretty good days in a row (record for me) but back in the soup today. That's ok. Those three days  gave me a look into my future and it was lovely. Today is a mixed bag of all the usual symptoms.

 

I started massage therapy last week and it's making a tremendous difference in my neck and shoulder pain and headaches. Two thumbs up  :thumbsup:

 

How's everyone else faring?

[[jj...]]

This is the only thread I'm still following and it's been in hiatus for a long long time looks like.

 

I'm doing pretty good, had a couple of weeks of a complete window and no wd symptoms what so ever. Then the burning skin crept back in and then some of the old usual suspects. So not healed but not terrible. Starting to think these last little leftovers will be with me for a good while, which is fine, they aren't getting in my way for the most part.

 

Good to hear that you got a window Kiddo, more are surely on the horizon, including the final one that doesn't close.

 

Peace!

 

jj

[[Le...]]

I am in a strange place. Windows, and waves in abundance. More windows than waves and for that I am thankful. Personally I just want to be rid of the symptoms as I am kind of forgetting what it was like to mot have this garbage. Sometimes a benzo lie will come in but after all I have been through they are getting easier to dismiss.

 

Someday we will all have this in our rear view mirrors. I hope that day to be soon.

 

God Bless you all.

[[Be...]]

I am in a bunker with small window. Frizzled brain feeling and vibrating body. Needed to cry for last day but couldn't. Asked husband to tell me something sad. Finally burst into tears when he said he felt bad that I had suffered so long. Got that out of my system and now back to buzzing. Going to take a little magnesium see if it calms.

 

Feel better everyone.

Bennie

[[Le...]]

I am in a bunker with small window. Frizzled brain feeling and vibrating body. Needed to cry for last day but couldn't. Asked husband to tell me something sad. Finally burst into tears when he said he felt bad that I had suffered so long. Got that out of my system and now back to buzzing. Going to take a little magnesium see if it calms.

 

Feel better everyone.

Bennie

 

Those vibrations are something. I usually get it iny shoulders and in my hands. Truly strange voyage this is, yeah?

[[Be...]]

I am in a bunker with small window. Frizzled brain feeling and vibrating body. Needed to cry for last day but couldn't. Asked husband to tell me something sad. Finally burst into tears when he said he felt bad that I had suffered so long. Got that out of my system and now back to buzzing. Going to take a little magnesium see if it calms.

 

Feel better everyone.

Bennie

 

Those vibrations are something. I usually get it iny shoulders and in my hands. Truly strange voyage this is, yeah?

 

I misread voyage for "voltage".  same thing, huh. Strange indeed.

 

After breakfast I took .30 g of mag glycinate out of a 120 mg capsule. The mag knocked down the vibrations about 40%, and then I got very sleepy. Couldn't sleep though, but I rested in twilight for a long time.

[[Ki...]]

Glad to see the magnesium helped, Bennie 

 

Hopefully some more people will chime in and this thread will come to life again!

[[Ca...]]

Hi,

  Checking in at 6 months off. Welcome to the new folks and hello again to my old friends. It's been a long while since I last wrote. I have tremendous admiration for all of you...this is one hard and long trek.

 

    I am always eager to hear how others are doing yet I have to be careful reading too much on the forum. I get anxious to know someone is very ill and at the same time grow concerned I am not healing fast enough when others are doing well! I find its best to check in now and then to say hello and give a quick update. I care so much about you...I think of you often.

 

  I am 6 months free after a very long taper. It has been rough though I see progress. I average 40 to 60% most days with occasional very low dips. I have to guard my energy and spend it wisely. Too many activities can sent me to deeper withdrawal so I am careful about scheduling. Most days I am able to be up and active finding distraction the key to getting through the tough days. The most prominent symptoms are muscle and nerve pain, anxiety, depression, arrythmias and dizziness. I could use a good dose of motivation...seems I used it all tapering!

 

  I have a consistent walking and yoga practice and eat well. I avoid alcohol. Supplements include magnesium, multi vitamin, vit d, fish oil and vit c. I recently started seeing a 5 Element acupuncture practitioner and am getting relief from the persistent arrythmias and tension. I am driving greater distances but still have not tackled freeway speeds. My second grandchild was born on Sunday and I was able to participate in this blessed event without much grief. Healing is happening!

 

  I am overall better than when on xanax and valium. It is still very challenging but I see myself healing and that is encouraging. Many days I did not think I would survive this mess and here I am....doing ok...could be better, but I am pleased to see progress.

 

  Much love, courage and compassion to you all. Thank you for walking with me.

 

Warmly,

 

Carita

[[Sa...]]

So lovely to hear from so many of you   I'd love to see this thread come back to life purely from a nostalgic point of view...it truly was my lifeline for many months. Part of my reluctance to post comes from knowing I'm so much further out as one of the original jumpers...I would not want to inadvertently scare anyone and let's face it our minds can get pretty messed up quite easily  I've also had this weird really weird sxs develop recently I'm trying to overcome. I seem to get flared when I post  yeah...go ahead and laugh it's ridiculous considering I'm well over 3500 posts 

 

I've seen a whole lot of healing happen there is little doubt about it. Recently I made the comment I'd write a succes story if the akathisia and depression took a long hike. It was a flip remark for sure, lol. There seems to be huge shift happening for me recently and this is meant to be a positive update. I see a significant lessening of all the mental sxs cognitively I've also made huge strides in healing.    the physical not so much and there are far too many sxs remaining for me to mention unfortunately. I'm sorry if that traumatized anyone it's a fact I was quite severely polydrugged and it's clearly going to take some more time for my brain to get it right. 

 

Ahem interrupted by the puppy drinking out of the toilet dogs are so disgusting at times aren't they? I mean for real why

 

Leo really you seen to making great progress that's terrific! Kiddo I'm so jelly about the massages...I have some extreme sensitivity to being touched I think stemming  from the opiate withdrawal combo. I'd kill for a massage

 

Bennie I'm sorry this can be utterly overwhelming and consuming. Be kind and gentle to yourself  don't lose your humor though ok it is a great weapon in this fight JJ I am thrilled you are going weeks at a time with no sxs. Wow just wow what a great outcome! Carita  Congrats on the 6 month mark wow I didn't realize that!!!!!! And on the new grandbaby they are oh so special aren't they? I'm thoroughly enchanted by mine and grateful I can finally feel the appropriate emotions which is truly a huge breakthrough. It really does get far better 

 

I will pop in when I can... but all of you are doing a wonderful job really you are 

 

 

[[Be...]]

Glad others have dropped in. Saga, it doesn't surprise me that you're still struggling with physical symptoms vs mental. I wish though, they would go away as you rounded the corner.

 

During MT, the first thing that came back on line was my cognition. The intense physical sxs I endured while tapering, like burning and neuropathy is long gone. But acute has brought on akathisia and inner vibration which = anxious state. I've stayed off the supplement bandwagon until now, and find the tiniest bit of magnesium helps. But overall, healing is probably a matter of time, so here I am, ready to hang out.

 

Wishing peace of mind and healing for everyone.

Bennie

[[Ki...]]

Just popping in to say we are all WARRIORS  We are still here, we are off the drugs and biding our time until healing happens.

 

I'm deep in the weeds today.....rampant health anxiety and catastrophic thoughts. My brain has been hijacked my ninjas and I don't like it. Not even a little. Ugh. This is hard.

 

Hoping everyone manages to find a little peace today 

[[Be...]]

I have a sore throat and have had odd feeling in chest for two days. Cold symptoms started several days ago, stopped, and now this.

 

 

Bennie

[[Le...]]

Snowed up here in MA, just shy of 3 inches in my town. So I decided to grab the keys to my car and take a spin. 10 minutes later I found myself smiling like a little kid after doing donuts i a snowed in parking lot.

 

Its hard to enjoy the little things when this whole process gets you down but my God is it fun setting everything aside and just having fun. Good times indeed!

 

Here's to better days ahead.

 

Leo

[[Be...]]

Leo,

Playing in snow is delightful. Not too much adrenalin? I miss snow in SF. I remember doing donuts in the snow with my high school boyfriend, when I lived in CT. Dunkin Donuts is more my speed though. You have both!

Bennie

[[Le...]]

Leo,

Playing in snow is delightful. Not too much adrenalin? I miss snow in SF. I remember doing donuts in the snow with my high school boyfriend, when I lived in CT. Dunkin Donuts is more my speed though. You have both!

Bennie

 

The rush was a little much too be honest Bennie. I got just slightly dizzy  and my heart stayed in a higher gear for a while after. All in all I felt like its time to start daring to do stuff again. Its been way too long feeling like crap.

 

It really was great but I would prefer sunshine and waves any day of the week.

[[Sa...]]

Thanks Bennie  I find it fascinating in a strange sort of way how this progresses for everyone...I am really sorry you have the akathisia and inner vibration combo going it's a beast of a combo one I'm very familiar with unfortunately. Great news the mag seems to help...I've also avoided any kind of supplements, although I did spend last weekend researching just in case I change my mind....hey if you're missing some snow I'd be happy to send you some. We are currently buried under 3 feet...a little excessive if you ask me

 

Glad you had some fun with it Leo

 

Hope you're feeling better today Kiddo ...we are warriors no doubt about it at all.

 

[[th...]]

Hey,

 

Haven't been on the boards much as I am still struggling tremendously at 1 yr off (today is actually my "anniversary") and am not sure what I can offer others as reassurance. Plus like so many others, become worse listening to story upon story of the life sucking trauma we call benzo Wd. I just try to keep plugging away, using the tools, and hoping for relief at some point. I suppose if I had to put a percentage of improvement on my status it would be I am about 50-60% on most days and 20% in the am and night. Still tortured by severe symptoms at those times but muster thru the rest of the day managing. It really is a devastating blow to hold on and hold on and hold on to get to a year mark to see little changes. I have been told my many that the 2nd yr brings the changes and healing, I guess all I can do is hold on some more.

 

Take care,

G

[[Sa...]]

Grinch    I'm so happy to see you here I've been thinking about you and Elle...in fact I posted an early congrats on the one year for both of you although I strongly suspected you both are struggling just as much as I was at the one year mark. SIGH...huge hugs to both of you. This is still a major and I mean a major milestone no matter how you're feeling. I know I had such mixed emotions that day myself.

 

All I can say is it ebbs and flows...it's very hard to see significant progress unless you're looking way back and I mean WAY back at least it's been that way for me. There is little doubt healing happens but it seems to be at a glacial pace most days. Stay strong and remember who you are and how far you've come...I know I've said that time and time again. Be fierce. You are both warriors and I'm so freaking proud of you.

 

 

 

[[th...]]

Grinch    I'm so happy to see you here I've been thinking about you and Elle...in fact I posted an early congrats on the one year for both of you although I strongly suspected you both are struggling just as much as I was at the one year mark. SIGH...huge hugs to both of you. This is still a major and I mean a major milestone no matter how you're feeling. I know I had such mixed emotions that day myself.

 

All I can say is it ebbs and flows...it's very hard to see significant progress unless you're looking way back and I mean WAY back at least it's been that way for me. There is little doubt healing happens but it seems to be at a glacial pace most days. Stay strong and remember who you are and how far you've come...I know I've said that time and time again. Be fierce. You are both warriors and I'm so freaking proud of you.

 

 

 

 

[[...]]

Saga,  I cannot tell you how grateful I am that you remembered this 1 year anniversary..  I think of you so often and hope your getting more relief..  At one year it is still such a struggle.  I read here daily but still so difficult for me to post (don't understand this fear)  I can't even talk about my symptoms because it causes fear.  Thank you for your friendship, you are truly such a kind lady for helping so many people on this forum.

 

grinch, congrats!  I hope we both see healing come this year.

 

all my love to everyone else struggling here

elle

[[th...]]

Saga,  I cannot tell you how grateful I am that you remembered this 1 year anniversary..  I think of you so often and hope your getting more relief..  At one year it is still such a struggle.  I read here daily but still so difficult for me to post (don't understand this fear)  I can't even talk about my symptoms because it causes fear.  Thank you for your friendship, you are truly such a kind lady for helping so many people on this forum.

 

grinch, congrats!  I hope we both see healing come this year.

 

all my love to everyone else struggling here

elle

 

You too Elle!! 

 

[[Sa...]]

Elle  I'm so happy to hear from you as well! Anything I've done to help in the way of support is absolutely my pleasure and freely given when I can post myself. I'm sorry you're struggling I thought as much :'( this is a daunting journey at times. Listen, I was astonished to read you also have the posting fear happening! I did not realize it happened to you as well! Truthfully it's been one of the more perplexing sxs for me. Multiple times I've tried to explain this to abcd and I simply cannot find the words to describe this!!!!!  There is literally a heightened physical reaction to posting.  you're not alone for sure this happens to me for months at a time. Honestly I don't care how crazy it sounds there must be some sort of correlation. I have literally been forcing myself to try posting through it the last few days.... Arghhh....much love to you Elle

 

[[th...]]

Elle  I'm so happy to hear from you as well! Anything I've done to help in the way of support is absolutely my pleasure and freely given when I can post myself. I'm sorry you're struggling I thought as much :'( this is a daunting journey at times. Listen, I was astonished to read you also have the posting fear happening! I did not realize it happened to you as well! Truthfully it's been one of the more perplexing sxs for me. Multiple times I've tried to explain this to abcd and I simply cannot find the words to describe this!!!!!  There is literally a heightened physical reaction to posting.  you're not alone for sure this happens to me for months at a time. Honestly I don't care how crazy it sounds there must be some sort of correlation. I have literally been forcing myself to try posting through it the last few days.... Arghhh....much love to you Elle

 

 

Neither of you are alone, I also have this reaction which is why I avoid the site. I literally have panic attacks reading and posting. I never used to, but it's been this way for about 9 ms. I hope it goes with the rest of the symptoms.

 

G

[[ca...]]

Hi

Just wanted to stop by and note that actually- yes I am a jumping buddy. I jumped one month ago. Good and bad days. Probably 60% healed. Depending on the day... Long way to go but I have seen worse and I do feel I am healing!!! I can actually feel it. 

 

Thinking of all of you.

Big Hug

Carem