HELP!! Continue with a 2nd cold turkey?

[[Pa...]]

 

Pease help me. I've been in a benzo withdrawal from hell for 13 months after a first cold-turkey from just 2 week's use of Restoril/temazepam for insomnia. I have almost every withdrawal symptom listed on this site, the worst being extreme insomnia, (0-3 broken hours of sleep per day for all 13 months) anxiety, agitation, depression, thoughts of self harm and dementia-like symptoms.  I am house/bed-bound and can barely function- can't watch tv, read, clean house, cook, exercise-even the sound of my dishwasher is too much for my senses. I am 60 years old.

I am a shell of the person I used to be.  I know this is all "normal" for withdrawal but I am so very tired. I feel if I could just sleep I could be able to handle all of my other symptoms so much better.

Stupidly, I forced myself to go to the psych dr in my pajamas last month (my husband had to drive me) to ask for help. Dr. prescribed temazepam again and Effexor antidepressant.  I have not tried the Effexor after reading reviews of it.

Out of desperation for sleep, I just went on temazepam again for 30 days (kindling?). Just like the first time I tried it, tolerance occurred after a few days.  My meds by mail program was late delivering my next refill, so I was forced into cold turkey withdrawal for 4 days.  My rx came in the mail yesterday, I caved and took it for 2 nights. I have only 3 refills left, my dr. will not rx it again.  Since I was already 13 months into withdrawal, I am trying to decide if I should continue with the cold turkey or continue to reinstate/ water taper what I have left? 

My first cold turkey story:  I had covid for 7 days.  2 days after that, I started having severe insomnia- sleeping 0-2 broken hours per night.  I believe Long Covid caused my insomnia and has increased the severity of my benzo withdrawal symptoms.

After 30 days of little sleep, I went to a psych dr.  Over the next month, he had me try 7 different prescription meds that are known to help sleep (2 were benzos, 1 was Ambien, a Z drug I had problems getting off of many years ago).  I'd try one for a night or two, when it didn't help me sleep, I'd dispose of it and try another.  (Dr. insisted if a drug was going to help me sleep, it would do so within a few night's time).  A list of rx drugs and otc  things I've tried for insomnia is in my user name's History.

None of the drugs I tried helped me sleep more than 2 hours except temazepam/Restoril.  I built a tolerance to it within a few days, though. I started craving sleep so badly that I took more than one 30 mg temazepam capsule per night just to get a few hours of sleep. I used up a one-month prescription within 11 days= VERY BAD IDEA because then I had to be off of it cold-turkey.   

 

 

Edited January 7 by [Pa...]

[[PE...]]

Yeah tolerance comes fast.. so what's your plan? Taper off or just quit?

Sound's like lots of on and off = kindling..

Good luck what ever you choose to do 

[[Pa...]]

43 minutes ago, [[n...] said:

Yeah tolerance comes fast.. so what's your plan? Taper off or just quit?

Sound's like lots of on and off = kindling..

Good luck what ever you choose to do 

No plan yet- trying to decide before I cave and take another tonight.

[[PE...]]

Yeah try stabilize before you start tapering if that's what you choose to do.

[[Pa...]]

3 minutes ago, [[n...] said:

Yeah try stabilize before you start tapering if that's what you choose to do.

What do you mean by stabilize?  Is that taking it for a few more nights before starting to taper?

[[PE...]]

Just now, [[P...] said:

What do you mean by stabilize?  Is that taking it for a few more nights before starting to taper?

Get to a point when dosing were you feel the same as the last time dosing.

[[PE...]]

The less problems/symptoms you have when start tapering the better.

[[PE...]]

Insomnia will probably be your worse enemy as I understand that's your main problem. Same here..

[[Pa...]]

On 05/01/2024 at 12:18, [[n...] said:

Get to a point when dosing were you feel the same as the last time dosing.

Thanks for trying to help! The thing is, I never have felt good on it.  Also, just like the first time I tried it, tolerance occurred after just a few days (5 hours of sleep down to 0- 2).

Edited January 7 by [Pa...]

[[PE...]]

Yes every benzo I been on, most of them, reached tolerance within a few days.. you feel bad now but when you just stop taking them you feel even worse right?

I was so tolerant so it didn't matter how big doses I took I was in bad wd. At most 150mg diazepam. Or 10mg k etc.

Edited January 5 by Guest

[[Ne...]]

My recommendation would be to taper and endure/accept/push through the symptoms.  It will not be pleasant but tapering could ease the length of withdrawal symptoms.  I learned that I became dependent on 30 mg of Temazepam on day 14 and went down to 15 mg for days 15 to 21 days and then jumped.  I am now in my 31st month since cold turkey with insomnia still being my biggest challenge.  Prior to Temazepam,  I slept like a baby and only took because of a health scare that turned out to be nothing.

[[wi...]]

I understand your suffering and I’m so sorry you’re in this incredibly rough spot.

I’m glad you have the support of your husband. 
 

Try and avoid a CT if possible. If you do switch to liquid dosing, remember when switching to a water taper it takes a small amount of time for your body to adjust and metabolize the new form of the drug.

Try and remember that each new day brings the potential for you feeling better.

Your brain and body are working hard at healing even though it feels the opposite may be true.

Sending you good vibes and healing energy.

 

 

[[ns...]]

Page one, I'm soo very sorry you are suffering, im going thru it too! As for your hearing sensitivity, I wear earplugs and use cc tv on YouTube to pass the time, my husband does all he can to keep it quiet around the house. I started desensitizing recently by taking the plugs out. If you can find some good earplugs, it will help. Sound causes so much anxiety during withdrawal, and I have found is contributing to alot of my suffering oddly enough. 

I had to start tapering due to either tolerance or a paradoxical reaction. So I'm tapering a benzo that's making me sick. I'm on my last 1mg, I'm in misery, 4x a day I take this tiny little 1/4mg and it gives me a panic attack, severe anxiety etc and I'm ready to bail. I want this stuff out of my body and brain. Don't know how I'll feel, worse or better, but I know eventually I will get past it. 

I agree with most above to taper slow if you can, but only u can decide this. A little bit less for a couple weeks and so on. There are people here who can walk u thru the process with suggestions. Stay away from anything stimulating, sugar, smoking, carbs, etc, practice gratitude. Thankfulness. I know it's hard but it really does help, think of what it would be like if u didn't have a bed, blankets. Heat etc, as an example, speak out, I am so grateful I'm not in a tent etc. This takes our mind to a more positive place. I am 65, been sick many yrs, this is the toughest journey yet. but i will make it! I've made up my mind and I have faith! Speak life to yourself,  teach your brain, watch therapy In a nutshell with emma on YouTube cc tv, no sound, she teaches on anxiety. Trauma, ptsd etc, not withdrawal but I think we are going through a type of trauma right now, anxiety absolutely.  She's really helpful.if you allow yourself to teach your brain so it can heal.  Try not to stay symptom focused, change your mind, remember,  your brain is trying to heal, it will, but it takes time and feeding your brain the right food is so important. I hope you give it a try.

I pray your suffering will be less, and that you will heal soon!

Sn