25 months off/free and finally healed

[[Su...]]

I was prescribed Ativan for a trip for my fear of flying. It was a seven day cruise that turned into rough seas and flash ahead, I had to take all the prescribed pills to just get through the flights and trip. Somewhere between that trip and pressures of life/work, I began taking Ativan regularly to cope with work and sleep issues. I was on and off it for 6 years. I’m 2019 it all began to go south. Agoraphobia set in, weird left side pain, extreme bouts of dizziness, heart palpitations, tinnitus, frequent UTI’s, blood in urine, panic, thyroid problems followed by thousands of dollars spent on tests and blood work. Only to be told the tests came back normal. I legit thought I was loosing my mind. One evening I sat and sobbed and began Googling benzodiazepines and stumbled on Benzo Buddies. A light bulb went off and I sobbed even harder!!! It WAS the little pill I was prescribed to help me that was causing me the toxic hell I was in!!!! Needless to say, I knew what I had to do. I was always on the lowest dose .25 mg (“so that can’t be the issue. Let’s up your dose. Is what my doctor said) It‘s really incredible that doctors even begin prescribing this garbage!!! I began cutting the small dose, filing down until one day, I just had had it and jumped. Looking back, it probably wasn’t the best idea but I was just over it! Little did I realize the hell I was about to experience…many days, death itself would have been easier. I will not lie, at my lowest point in healing, I cried and begged the Lord to just take me. I prayed and cried a lot. I tried every technique for anxiety known…counting 3 things, describing the 3 things…etc. I tried supplements. My only relief was lots and lots of water to flush out the toxins in my body and Vitamin D3 and Tums (calcium carbonate) for the dizziness (read an article about that and it really helped) with every bathroom trip to pee, I envisioned the toxins flushing out. Slowly but surely…I would get glimpses of what life was once like. The waves and windows, I held out hope that I actually WAS healing. The good days began to out number the bad and all the mystery illnesses slowly faded. The weird left side pain first faded, tinnitus began to heal and diminished ever so slightly, no more UTI’s and blood in urine gone. The last things to go for me were the dizziness and agoraphobia. I really had to push myself to work on the agoraphobia part. I swear I had developed PTSD from the whole damn experience. 25 months and I am free. Life is back. I work with passion and live with gratitude and my heart is overflowing with love. My husband was a damn saint through the years of hell. I don’t know how I didn’t loose him and my career. I am lucky. Please keep hope, stay the course, life is beautiful and meant to be lived! Fear is okay to feel. Anxiety is a way of life and now it passes as quickly as it started now. We now spend our free time fishing and enjoying being outside in nature. I now enjoy my retail therapy shopping trips with my daughter. I enjoy my time spent with my friends and our outings together. We DO heal!!  I NEVER looked back!!! God bless all of you!! Tears flow writing this and I pray all of you find your happiness!!!

[[fa...]]

This is great!  Good job, I'm thankful you pulled through.  The Lord is good.

 

Enjoy life . Keep me in prayer please.

[[...]]

      Congratulations!

[[Sc...]]

Please share how u progressed each month

[[pi...]]

Congratulations to you, your post will give hope and encouragement to those still in the process. Enjoy that retail therapy and your life of wellness!

 

pianogirl 

[[da...]]

This is wonderful!

[[Ha...]]

Fantastic. Have a wonderful happy life!

Hardy x

[[Co...]]

This gives me hope, I've been dealing with 3.5 years of tapering alone off a 24mg a day clonazepam dose, what you say is totally true, how do doctors prescribe this crap anymore let alone give it out in doses above the FDA maximum dose limits for kpin. I remember how amazing it felt when I got off a 5mg dose in 2007, but stupidly got back on them cuz of circumstances and weakness and plain being addicted. I hope one day I can find this  peace again cuz yeah there's been more then a few times I gladly would have rolled over and died. And many others where I pray for the strength to get me through this process without relapses with alcohol or something.

 

I'm extremely happy for you. Anyone getting free of this poison is a miracle really.