URGENT, MUSCLE GONE, LOOK 70 LBS, ADRENALINE/SURGING 24/7, GI FULL, LITTLE FOOD

[[Ti...]]

Very thin and GI not working, autonomic issues, limbic system issues, malnourished, GI full and can't purge, look 70 lbs, surging is non stop, body can't handle any stress at all, idk what to do, blown off by everyone, severe medical PTSD and truama now, don't live in a good area, drs don't treat safely, on a taper but it's on hold, long story, but at 2.75 X, was on 6. Any advice with GI shutdown and surging and severe malnutrition and emaciation please.

[Guest [...]]

Hi Timmer420

 

Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

We’re glad you found us.

 

We’ll do our best to help you work through some of your issues, but before we can offer any potential insight, we really need to know more about your situation… especially your medication and taper history, so the best place to start is by having you fill out you history/signature. Instructions on the kind of information to provide are at the link. Providing this insight into your medications and taper to date will help us detect any potential mistakes or changes that may need to be implemented to ease your taper from here on… my history/signature is at the bottom of my post… just to give you an idea.

 

How many times a day are you dosing? Xanax is a very short half life benzo, so if you’re not dosing often enough, you run the risk of inter-dose withdrawals. Often members have to dose Xanax anywhere up to 6 times per day to avoid these inter-dose withdrawals.

 

How long have you been tapering?

 

How fast have you been tapering? How often have you been reducing, and by what percentage at each reduction?

 

Any other medications?

 

Add your history/signature

 

You will have access to plenty of information and resources here at BB, as well as the opportunity to interact with a whole community of members all happy to offer support and provide feedback to any questions you may wish to ask on the various forum boards.

 

Please take the time to look through information at the various other links I will provide below.

 

If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask.

 

Again, welcome!

 

WS

 

Here are a few links to help get you started.

 

Colorado Consortium Benzodiazepine Deprescribing Guidance

 

Withdrawal Support (during your taper)

 

The Ashton Manual

 

 

 

 

[[Ti...]]

I'm new here and don't understand website and am very sick. Was put on X 2015 following Dr injury, by 2018, I had a slew of health issues, I've never been the same, the Dr didn't prescribe me right, I went from .25 I'm assuming as I can't remember to 6 mg in 5 yrs, Ive had chronic stress and pain due to injury, other health issues. My system tipped, panic attacks, surging, reacting to food, GI shut down, wasting, emaciation during abuse, I haven't been able to recover, I can't really eat, I look maybe 70 lbs, I can't control surging and fight or flight, no sleep, severely malnourished, was forced on a taper when my prescribing Dr quit, by a primary care Dr, I was so sick and in active withdrawal and had hit tolerance way before the taper, I got worse over taper, taper on hold now, I think I'm so thin and malnourished and full of stool that the dose those half, 2.75 is too much more me, struggling to breath, brain and body not syncing, in constant fight or flight and no sleep and little food and bowel build up and literally skin and bones idk what to do, I have no help or guidance, mainly bedridden , it's taken 4 times a day, idk what I'm doing, dosing schedule is 330 pm, 930on 230 am and 6-7 am, I don't sleep really and am trying to space then out becuz I think I'm high risk for OD this emaciated, i feel like I'm literally dying, this started in 2020, I'm on nothing else, eat very little becuz it's not coming out, air hunger and trying to remember how to breathe had come to a head, I take .75 ,then .50, then .50, then 1mg, that's how it's spaced, starting at 3pm to 7am, it's not helping me, it hasn't since 2020, I had no idea about this drug, all my symptoms ran into each other with the injury that is still kicking my butt so I had no idea I could be hitting tolerance and withdrawl til it was too late. I need urgent help and guidance, I can't find anyone like me in this situation, idk if I'm supposed to post this here but idk how to use website on phone, I didn't get notified via email that you commented back either for some reason, please help and guide. Ty. This is dangeorus to be this thub, malnourished full of waste on this dose. Everything is on autopilot and I can calm, think adrenals are fried. Idk how to find help.  Current held taper since last late fall/early winter at 2.75. a primary took my down from 6 and was taking me down .50 a month and it was wrecking me, this was December 2021, taper got slowed to minus .25 every other month from July to Oct 2022 by someone new and then she quit on me and then I'm with someone since then that has held me where I am due to how sick I am, he doesn't want to make me worse or add more stress, I'm not sure he realizes a lot of this is becuz of X, not all but a lot. I'm hoping someone will see this and respond. Idk what I'm doing on website or with X.

[[Ti...]]

Also I've always taken under the tongue. I didn't know any different. Some gets swallowed, I dont well with eating either. My nervous system seems to be so dysregulated I can't pee get gas or stool out and react to everything, that's prolly the constant surging and fight or flight. 

[[Ti...]]

Also was dxd with eds mast cell pots mold and heavy metal toxicity after this. Because I'm so full of stool and reactive, I can hardly put anything in, it's making me worse, I'm not getting enough food and I have signs of sibo and infection, I'm terrified of hospitals drs and drugs now from what I've been thru, when in constant surging and fight or flight and intense suffering that started a decade ago with a Dr injury, my body is tapped, idk what to do, so scared, plz someone let me know if you have experience or suggestions. I can't make rash decisions like this.

[[Pa...]]

It looks like you’re on 2.75 mgs of Xanax and you’ve been holding this dose for over a year?

[[Ti...]]

Yes, I went from 6 to 2.75 in 8-9 months, wrecked me, I had no say so in the taper, I was forced, I was in major withdrawal and had hit tolerance well before the taper, I was constantly surging, in fight or flight, GI wasn't working, I couldn't eat much, I started to waste, the taper got picked up by an actual psych person finally, as the other 2 were not psychs, this person said I never should have been forced like I was, I should have had a say in it, it shouldn't have been done as sick as I was in general he put a hold on the taper becuz of how dangerously sick I was, he initially was thinking to put me on Klonopin instead, he did a gene site test and also realized just how sick I was and held it, I don't think either one of us knew I would be even sicker and not better at all, the pandemic hurt my health care, I had pre-existing chronic pain and illness before Xanax, I think Xanax just made me worse but it was yrs later I am now finding out about how it hasn't helped, bowel preps and laxatives don't work or make me worse, I have so much stool inside me, eating is forced, very little, have been too sick to undergo testing to rule out a blockage of sorts, I'm super reactive and can't detox, I'm afraid I'm going to stroke out I'm so hypervigilent, surging all the time, the wasting is happening so fast right now as my symptoms and health have worsened, I have severe trauma from all this and am not handling anything well. Idk what help looks like or if there is any. No Dr will touch this drug or me, near where I live. I'm been declining and wasting to a dangerous level since 2021, I don't know what is safe if anything this emaciated. It's better to be overweight then underweight.

[[Pa...]]

It looks to me like you have two choices, begin to taper again and get off the drug that’s doing this to you, or increase your dose to hopefully pull you out of this situation, and eventually do a slow taper off.

[[Ti...]]

I already know the provider won't up the dose, I'm also high risk for OD in system becuz of the fact I'm so emaciated. I've been told by a holisitic person I need nervous system work and trauma work before I should attempt anything more as I can't handle anything in this situation but I can't find help period.

[[Pa...]]

Okay, it looks like you only have one choice.  My feeling is if you taper off the drug, there is an excellent chance your body and mind will recover.  I don’t see how attempting to do nervous system or trauma work will do any good (not sure what this is) as long as you’re still taking the drug.  Would like help planning the rest of your taper?

[[Ti...]]

Basically I've been traumatized and have severe triggers and PTSD from 10 yrs of suffering, from uncontrolled pain from skull down from Dr injury, to losing everything in my life, I'm not able to be a human anymore, I'm bedridden mainly, I've become so emaciated it has caused a slew of more health issues, not allowing me to eat or go to the bathroom, I have all the signs of partial and intermittent blocking, laxatives and bowel preps have backfired, due to traumatizing reactions and abuse and lack of safety my system tipped, the X couldn't keep up anymore, trying to get better stressed my stress response system more, I started surging in 2020, I started wasting in late 2020 to early 2021, one is supposed to be able to eat sleep go the bathroom and to survive, I'm paralyzed by panic I can't control becuz I'm hypersensitive, if you don't understand trauma and PTSD, that's a big deal, it can paralyze a person, trauma affects nervous system as well as toxins and now benzos and my injury. My health was already fragile before a forced taper, that just made me worse, I'm in a very delicate state, my body can't handle stress at all, my BP is up, I'm suffering from full bowel lack of getting out urine and gas, I don't do well on medications, I don't have a team of drs or support, my body is like thst of a 90 yr old, just talking about my situation causes me to start surging, being in a state of what feels like adrenal failure, with dysautonomia, and withdrawal and chronic stress and this emaciated and malnourished puts me in a dangerous state, I don't know how to come down this sick, even the psych Dr said too dangeorus. But I can't get physical help and am paralyzed by severe medical trauma, when I start surging it puts me in a dangeorus state, it's almost always like this now, coming down people get worse, I don't know how my body can't handle that, I'm also on the worst you could be on, X, becuz it's the shortest acting, not that I feel like it does anything anymore but I take it so I don't seize though I feel like I could at any time.

[[Pa...]]

I understand how bad things are for you but this only confirms in my mind what you need to do, get off the drug that’s doing this to you.  We can help but if you’re not ready yet, we’ll be here when you are.

[Guest [...]]

Hi Timmer

 

I totally agree with Pam… you really need to come off this drug. I don’t see any other way around it, based on what you’ve expressed here.

 

It sounds like you’re having a lot of gastrointestinal issues, including constipation.

 

Could you list any gut related symptoms?

[[Ti...]]

Signs of bowel blockage, rectal obstructing, whole colon full at least, the only test that was able to be done with contrast backfired, I've been told they think I need colon out but too malnourished, drs have left me to die, wasted to the point I have no muscle left, glutes and bottom completely gone, legs gone, arms gone, just skin and bone, was told I had infection in gut by a functional type guy back in 2021 and if I didn't get it fixed I would starve to death, full of heavy metals flagged high and mold I can't detox, gas trapping in intestines and rectally, full of gas that can't come out, full of stool that can't come out, stool getting trapped by tailbone, muscular skeletal twisting and out of alignment from Dr injury, organs squished and don't feel in place, had abdominal hernia repairs with mesh, last tone 13 yrs ago, was told never to gain or lose weight or have another child, I have a connective tissue disorder apparantly that can cause a lot of what I have going on, felt like mid abdomen ripped open in late 2021, dropped me to the ground, I was emaciated then as well and full of stool, my guess the weight of the stool burden and emaciation and connective tissue disorder had formed adhesions from surgury and gave way, stomach appearance changed, so much pain, started having gas trapping more so, also have ileo cecal valve area issues, can't tolerate eating, wrecks me, very little forced in, I do it becuz I feel sick from no food and my nervous system ramps up more the longer I go, starving to death literally, system tipped in 2020 though I was hospitalized before that when I blocked up in 3 areas, prep worked that time, but hasn't since, forcing food into a gut that isn't moving, or is trapped, once BMI gets so low colon can't work, I'm bedridden, haven't been able to eat well due to jaw injury, limited diet, very few foods, little calories, it's clean none the less I react, have developed PTSD from the symptoms and the trauma of all this, bloating bad, cramping, pain, shortness of breath, rectum has issues according to a test, have been able to get very little testing done becuz of my surging, bad reacting, emaciation, weight is way higher than I look, it's the waste, trouble with urinating now, can't do enemas or laxatives or preps, they make me worse, naseau, scared of hospitals drs meds, can't control adrenaline since trauma is so severe from symptoms and failed attempts and now I'm treated and no support, no activity, weight started going down when GI halted during surging, haven't had normal urge since ,2020, don't get urges anymore, just pressure at times and pain, if I can force any out manually it's either overflow undigested or it's trapped weird shaped flat pieces, smells so bad and black specks and mucus, been ignored by drs but also can't control surging to attempt care anymore, I got way worse trying to push myself to get help, surging was so bad I thought I was going to die, I wasted even more in it, all kinds of symptoms, been slowly wasting and dying since late 2020, I haven't tried many things becuz I can't handle reactions, I freak, my BP is high now from all this, my surging is not controllable and is reacting mainly I think to the trauma stress and pain and knowing I have no help and am not in a good area, I was told I needed to go to a special hospital last year for an eating disorder which is crap, I want to eat but betw my jaw locked and disclosed and inability to chew and swallow well, and the reactions to food and no motility, I can't hardly, im forcing food into a body that is saying no. Abuse caused my benzo I think to hit tolerance, stress from that and it's been downhill to the point of losing my life since, drs won't touch the med becuz of my health state, I've been told by a holistic person I need trauma/nervous system work to be able to handle coming down off the drug, I can't even talk about my life or symptoms without surging , PTSD is severe, I think it's becuz im scared of death and I've been thru so much and I see no options and when actively surging you can't think straight and react more, there's a lot to my story, if I could not surge and didn't have so much truama including the symptoms im going thru which trigger me to surge more, than maybe I could get help but I'm so high risk for bad stuff being so emaciated, drs don't want to mess with me, think I'm a liability

[Guest [...]]

Honestly, Timmer

 

I’m so sorry to hear the pain and distress this has caused you.

 

When I asked you about the gut related symptoms, I was predominantly waiting to hear if you had excessive gas in your intestinal tract. I’m not a medical practitioner, but I do have SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth) which means bacteria have colonised in the small intestine, feeding off all carbs and sugars, creating inflammatory gases which break down the lining of the intestinal walls (intestinal permeability) from where, not only is the gut and entire digestive system adversely affected, but toxins leak through into other parts of the body through the holes in the intestinal walls caused by the SIBO. You can either have Methane based SIBO (causing constipation), Hydrogen based SIBO (causing diarrhoea), or a combination of both.

 

I would honestly encourage you to go back to the Functional Integrative Medical Practitioner and do the necessary tests related to SIBO, Intestinal Permeability (Leaky Gut), and Dysbiosis of the Microbiome.

 

I’m certainly not qualified to discuss any potential surgery related issues, but I would urge you to go back and follow through with any testing the FIMP thinks necessary.

 

Note: it has now been discovered over 80% of people with any kind of IBS, test positive for SIBO.

 

WS