Update from an insomniac 😴

[[Sh...]]

Hey team. I haven’t been here for a while so thought I’d drop in and say hi x

 

Just a little update.

 

My sleep is still rough but so much better than it was. I sleep 28 - 35 hrs a week and some nights it’s very light but I usually feel ok. I do an hour of heavy weights and 1-2 hrs of cardio a day now, I’m definitely getting my strength back. I eat super clean, I take a few sups and am alternating 1/4 of a unisom a night. I still take melatonin.

 

My heart is better than it was but still only averaging 53 bpm. Not as many palpitations.

 

My 2 year anniversary off zop came and went. I’ve been too busy to notice.

 

Life is definitely getting better for me and it will for u too given enough time.

 

Never give up 💪🏾

[[ka...]]

💕💕here’s to you and more healing. 💕💕

[[Li...]]

Shayna,

 

So great to hear this.  I'm looking forward to better days too. It's encouraging to hear. Wonderful that you have your life back on track, I'm so hoping for that day soon.

 

Big hugs!

 

LiveLife

[[Sh...]]

Thanku girls x

 

Live I still have challenging days yesterday was and I feel like today will be too but I’m not dialed into it like I used to be. I am able for the most part to just push it aside and get on with it, instead of being completely derailed by my symptoms.

 

It is time and only time. I think the trauma of it all will stay with me and I guess if I can let go of that it would help but that nastiness just has a death grip u know? It’s going to take a while for me to get over it. I had some tummy trouble recently and my family told me to go to the drs and there’s no way in hell I’m doing that. I still have a lot of anger towards the medical community.

 

I guess what I’m saying is I was so very unwell but I have healed enough to claim success even tho I’m still recovering. Ur day will come please hold on to hope. I never dreamed I’d feel even this good and I am greatful every day for where I am. It’s a miracle x

[[ja...]]

Jeezis Shayna.... so good to hear...  and you described it so well.

How you can push thru instead of being totally derailed by symptoms....

I share your anger with the medical community.  Well.... mine's more like disrespect.  I'm approaching a year post jump....  just hearing about your sleep gives me courage....

Well done!!!!

[[Sh...]]

Thanku Jan xxx how’s ur sleep going? I hope it’s improved. Last night was a 5 star shit show sleep wise for me … ugh 😩

[[Sh...]]

💕💕here’s to you and more healing. 💕💕

 

Same to u honey x lots of love from across the ditch x

[[Di...]]

Shayna its good to hear your progress.  You are only going to keep getting better!  I totally agree with you about the medical community I have so much distrust in them its just pitiful.

 

Have you by any chance heard anything from Aussiegalrecovery?  She hasn't been on here since July and I am so afraid something has happened to her.  She was so sick and she had told me that she was on palliative care. 

 

Hugs🤗

[[...]]

Congratulations, Shayna! I’m very happy for you.

 

Sandy

[[Li...]]

Ha Shayna,

I am happy for you that you are improving and your sleep is getting better, I remember you had a lot of trouble with your sleep. I am almost finished with my taper, I just have a crumb of zopiclone to go.

Good luck,

Jerry

[[Sh...]]

Shayna its good to hear your progress.  You are only going to keep getting better!  I totally agree with you about the medical community I have so much distrust in them its just pitiful.

 

Have you by any chance heard anything from Aussiegalrecovery?  She hasn't been on here since July and I am so afraid something has happened to her.  She was so sick and she had told me that she was on palliative care. 

 

Hugs🤗

 

Thanku dee x ❤️ I hope ur doing well too xx

 

No I haven’t spoke to her. I hope she’s ok too!

[[Sh...]]

Congratulations, Shayna! I’m very happy for you.

 

Sandy

 

Thanku sandy x how are u doing?

[[Di...]]

Hi Shayna,

You are welcome.  I'm having a rough time but one of these days.

 

I sure hope Aussie is ok too.

 

Hugs🤗

[[Sh...]]

Ha Shayna,

I am happy for you that you are improving and your sleep is getting better, I remember you had a lot of trouble with your sleep. I am almost finished with my taper, I just have a crumb of zopiclone to go.

Good luck,

Jerry

 

Hey z buddy! Thanku yes it can still be challenging but mostly it’s manageable.

 

Wow jerry that’s fantastic news, good on you. I hope ur dad is well and ur still enjoying ur swimming and 🎷 sax. X I think u will do fine when u decide ur taper is finished. Just keep busy that’s the key x

[[Sh...]]

Hi Shayna,

You are welcome.  I'm having a rough time but one of these days.

 

I sure hope Aussie is ok too.

 

Hugs🤗

 

I’m sorry to hear that lovely. I still have rough days for sure, even rough weeks, but even though those times are very hard I always know I’ll come out of it and that gives me the strength to endure it. It will happen for u too. Better days are coming.

 

I will go back on her posts. There’s a few of us Aussies on here, I’m just not sure where she lives. I have a terrible memory since all this happened to me, not enough rem sleep means little memory consolidation I’m afraid. Aussie chicks are pretty tough. She’ll pull thru x ❤️

[[Di...]]

Thank you Shayna for the words of encouragement.  You have come so far in this journey I pray you will be healed very soon.

 

I can't remember where she lived either but I'm thinking close to the ocean which I guess could be anywhere over there.  Wish I could be more help.

 

Hugs🤗

[[Sh...]]

She either lives on the Sunshine Coast or in Adelaide, one is close the other isn’t, but I don’t give my number out off forum anymore, I learnt my lesson the hard way there. I’ve sent her a message I hope she’s ok. It’s such a lonely process weather it’s surrounded by people or ur totally alone. I hope she has good care regardless. It’s so unfair that meds can do this to us then there’s no help to fix the mess they cause.

[[Wo...]]

Oh my favorite wonder from down under! I’m so glad you’re doing better! Each day is one step at a time,  and every day does get better! I’m right there with ya! I’m almost 15 months off and doing quite well. You said it perfectly….. We just brush aside and deal with the withdrawal feelings. Mine are manageable and coming less and less. (Knock on wood!) I’ll never forget the ordeal or process but I think of it less now. I too will never trust the medical doctors. (Or most of them anyway) I’ll Shays do my research on all medications that’s for sure! I just got back from a vacation with my family. It was wonderful! My fifth trip this year! I wish one of these trips someday will be to Australia!! Life does get better and we do heal however slow it goes! I’m so glad you check in so I can follow asking with how you’re doing! I don’t get in much anymore. I just do better if I don’t. I will forever remember you as one of my best supporters and inspirations for me in this whole f’d up crap show called benzo hell! You completely Rock and I sure am always sending you big hugs and positive vibes! Keep on rocking it girl!  :smitten:

[[Sh...]]

Oh my buddy WW x Thanku for those sweet words! I think of u often and always send a little kiss off on the wind and hope it floats all the way over to u x

 

I’m so glad ur doing well too! Crazy how the time goes once ur off. Or once u start to feel semi normal!

 

Oh how lovely! I’m about to go on one next week and I cannot wait! I have work 1 year with no break so I am tired! It’s only for a week but I can’t wait! Where did u and the fam go?

 

U make sure u msg me when u get here one day x I’ll take u to my creek for a swim ❤️

[[Di...]]

She either lives on the Sunshine Coast or in Adelaide, one is close the other isn’t, but I don’t give my number out off forum anymore, I learnt my lesson the hard way there. I’ve sent her a message I hope she’s ok. It’s such a lonely process weather it’s surrounded by people or ur totally alone. I hope she has good care regardless. It’s so unfair that meds can do this to us then there’s no help to fix the mess they cause.

 

Thank you Shayna I hope you hear from her.

[[...]]

You’re welcome, Shayna. Like you I’m doing pretty well. I still have some very challenging days, but I’m persevering! I’m grateful to be where I’m at.

 

May we all keep getting better and better!

 

Sandy🥰

[[Sh...]]

I’m glad things are better for u sandy xx yep those tough days are difficult alright but if they are the minority that is a very good thing. We all deserve to be better, it takes far too long.

 

The hot weather is here finally, it’s been strangely cool where I live but I am sooo sunburnt now it’s beginning to feel a lot like summer! You guys are in fall again? x crazy how the time goes

[[...]]

Good to hear your recovering shayna. How where able to start functioning again on so little sleep? i am trying so hard to be able to keep going on 3 or 4 hours a night but all I can muster the energy for is to perform subpar at work. Also are you able to nap during the day at all. I cannot. I start nodding off but everytime I am brought back by what I call an adrenaline surge. Heart starts beating fast and kinda get dizzy.

[[Be...]]

aussiegal has posted recently on this forum. 

[[Sh...]]

Hey X-ray. Yeah most nights I get 4 hours but last night I think I got 2 and I just worked it was hard but I just have the attitude of “oh well” and I just get on with it. I got. Random 6 the other day but that never happens. I usually average 4- 4.5. It’s enough. I’d love 5 every night but not much I can do about it. I make sure I throw everything at my day every day and just live as tho I have normal sleep. Extreme radical acceptance x