Muscle tension and withdrawal lenght

[[RR...]]

Do some of you have extreme muscle tension that came after tapering off or jumping your meds? I've been clean since April this year and the extreme muscle tensions are all over the place. Neck, legs, jaw, feet etc. My legs can suddenly tens up madly just sitting in the chair, like I'm squatting weights or something. In addition to this I have heavy head tremors and loss of coordination, especially in my arms and head+neck. My neck muscles tens up like a boxers fist right before a punch. That's my closest comparison. My own theory to this is that neurons are firing left and right, like my whole system is hyperactive and on red alert. It's been like this actually for a year when I started to experience odd sensations still during Xanax consumption, but it exceeded rapidly when I did a full benzo exit in April. Anyone experiencing the same physical stuff?

 

After being on Xanax for 23 years I'm afraid I'm one of those cases your read about in the Ashton report where the withdrawal can last for several years. It terrifies me to be carrying that burden for years - or even for life! Another thing that worries me is when a GP that works with benzo addicts said "well, you shouldn't be experiencing withdrawals this long. Withdrawals for over a year seems very long." Not a word on withdrawal that comes in between doses or while consuming benzo. He couldn't even tell me if Xanax or benzo's in general could create severe head and neck tremors or extreme muscle tension. He just said "some light tremors are not uncommon". And then he just said something like "I guess you never know". I spoke to that doc on the phone so he's never met me, my tremors are not light! It looks like I'm having an epileptic seizure when I start trembling, the head tremors almost always come when I try to sit straight up, poring water into a cup and reaching for my computer mouse, the latter always generates heavy leg tension as well. My head is also slowly tilting forward when sitting straight and it doesn't stop until I either stop it by raising my head or when my chin reaches my chest. This loss of coordination is devastating. I've had a neurologist assessment where I wrongfully was diagnosed with the good old benign essential tremor, I write wrongfully cause that diagnose was dismissed twice by a second and third opinion at a different neurologist, but the latter couldn't explain my current physical issues. He just observed and confirmed my tremors. I've discussed these neurological experiences in a former post here on BB and received alot of great input on that. 

 

How rare is it to have severe benzo withdrawal for several years? I feel partly crippled already. This is my biggest challenge cause the tensions and tremors make me wanna return to Xanax just to see if that will give me some much wanted relief, but I know that will set me back alot in terms of staying clean and probably generate more withdrawals over time - but then there's this thought in the back of my mind telling me this is not benzo withdrawal and that I'm crippled for life due to long term Xanax side effects or chronic neurological illness due to that god damn evil Xanax poison running trough my blood and brain for so many years.         

[[Br...]]

RR200-

 

The symptoms you describe are common in withdrawal.  For a discussion of many (but not all) withdrawal symptoms check out Ch III in The Ashton Manual

I think your theory about your muscle tension is very good.  Have you read this piece:  What's happening inside your brain. I found it incredibly comforting and came back to it repeatedly.

 

Many of us experience exactly what you describe - the fear of never healing.  It can help to recognize fear is itself a hallmark of withdrawal, a product of the brain healing itself and recalibrating to re-establish equilibrium.  I can't tell you how many times I sought reassurance that I would feel like myself again and that the misery would end.  I'm guessing just about everyone on the forum has experienced this.  But healing happens.  Our bodies have a miraculous ability to heal. But healing takes time and often a lot more time than we would have signed up for.  It requires enormous patience and strength, but you will get through this and healing will happen. 

 

One last link - I encourage you to read Success Stories when you need a boost.

 

Take care,

Brighterday

[[RR...]]

RR200-

 

The symptoms you describe are common in withdrawal.  For a discussion of many (but not all) withdrawal symptoms check out Ch III in The Ashton Manual

I think your theory about your muscle tension is very good.  Have you read this piece:  What's happening inside your brain. I found it incredibly comforting and came back to it repeatedly.

 

Many of us experience exactly what you describe - the fear of never healing.  It can help to recognize fear is itself a hallmark of withdrawal, a product of the brain healing itself and recalibrating to re-establish equilibrium.  I can't tell you how many times I sought reassurance that I would feel like myself again and that the misery would end.  I'm guessing just about everyone on the forum has experienced this.  But healing happens.  Our bodies have a miraculous ability to heal. But healing takes time and often a lot more time than we would have signed up for.  It requires enormous patience and strength, but you will get through this and healing will happen. 

 

One last link - I encourage you to read Success Stories when you need a boost.

 

Take care,

Brighterday

 

 

Thanks Brighterday. I really appreciate your response to this.

 

I didn't know there's a forum category for success stories, I just recently signed up as a user here. Definitely already reading that. Also thanks for the other links! The article about the brain functions is truly a fantastic contribution. Best thing about this forum is that it has REAL experiences and not doctors with prescription addiction that "knows everything" about how benzo's work although they have never swallowed a single benzo pill themselves. 

[[Ar...]]

 

I have a strong tension in the muscles of the neck, face, back and stomach, such a feeling that the neck is pulling the head towards the back, and the muscles of the face are pulling down. Continuous twitching of the face and blepharospasm. As if the threads were being pulled all over the face and head. A spasm of the neck pulled the lower jaw back. Very painful and continuous.

[[Ar...]]

RR200, is muscle tension continuous?

[[RR...]]

RR200, is muscle tension continuous?

 

They are not equally continuous but I'm always tens. The muscles are tensing up extremely in some postures like when I sit straight in a chair the neck tenses up so much it's like a strung bow, then after the tension has built up to max my head starts to tremble like a nervous leaf. When I hit the pivot point it also feels like electric pulses are firing, it's hard to explain, like having electric currency running trough my head and neck. My head tilts slowly forward in the same scenario, like it's impossible to balance my head in a straight position. Like my trapezius has lost connection and strength, my head feels like a "runaway train". The tension in the leg muscles also increases drastically when I sit down, then when I'm up walking the muscles relaxes - but never to a 100% relaxed level. When standing still the leg muscles tenses up again. The head tremors almost always starts with the tension of the neck muscles. My best analogy to that is the fist of a punching fighter versus a relaxed hand. When I sit me feet also point upwards and there's nothing I can do except really focus on relaxing them, one foot a a time. I also rub teeth alot.  The jaw is always tens and my jaw is shut tight alot.

 

I was thinking Xanax has a strong muscle relaxing property, could it be it's all back clashing now with extreme tension due to lack of muscle relaxing substances in my bloodstream? I never had this when I was on Xanax. Feels like my body is in a state where it's unable to coordinate and relax. Like the brain is confused sending wrong signals to my muscles, like the message is: Tens up! Get ready! Be alert!  I'm so tempted to take Xanax now to see if that would give me total relief but that's not an option if I'm gonna fulfill the promise to myself of never taking that stuff again. Been almost 6 months clean now except that one dose in June. As so many I have the reserve emergency pills ready but I'm trying to keep it out of sight and mind.

[[Ar...]]

 

are there severe pains?

[[Aj...]]

My body is literally crushing itself lengthwise.

It is constant. Not spasms but fixed rigid contracture of every muscle head to feet, front, back and sides.

It never lets go.

I know ppl who have been stuck in rigid contracture lying on side in shiny for 3+ years from this.

[[RR...]]

 

are there severe pains?

 

I wouldn't call it severe pain. I get pain like sore, as if I've been working out. When I wake up the neck is very sore from all the muscle tension. When I have to rest my head on my hand and the elbows to the table to stop head tremors it get kinda painful after a while.

[[Ar...]]

 

I have pain of such intensity that it is impossible to endure, even 5 minutes, you can go crazy. Perhaps the spasmodic muscles have pinched some nerve .. I don’t know .. no one can tolerate such torment ..

[[Aj...]]

Mine is not spasm. It is extreme fxed contracture. Like all muscles are 2/3rds of fullness length and have turned to dried out jerky.

 

I know ppl who have been stuck lying on their side in one position in agony for 3 years.

 

What you are experiencing is relatively common in WD.

 

There are ppl who pass out from the extreme pain this can cause.

 

I know men who were body builders whom have screamed in pain for months and mnths because of it.

 

[[Ar...]]

Mine is not spasm. It is extreme fxed contracture. Like all muscles are 2/3rds of fullness length and have turned to dried out jerky.

 

I know ppl who have been stuck lying on their side in one position in agony for 3 years.

 

What you are experiencing is relatively common in WD.

do you have severe pain?

[[tr...]]

I too experience muscle tension and tightness, but I find it helpful to do stretching each day (kinda like yoga..gentle stretch and hold), and sometimes I alternate with heat and/or cold packs.

It seems to be worse when I wake, so I get moving and it helps to loosen it.

 

Its a common symptom but it does go for most ppl eventually. Muscles are affected by benzo wd just like so many of our other bodily systems. Give it time. Do not get freaked out about this. 

[[...]]

Hi arnold,

I have the exact muscle sx as you described. You are the only one mentioned about the muscle sx triggered or intensified by using some body streghth like reaching your computer. I can't use any force when standing such as reaching up for an item on shelf above my chest, or cutting a potato using the little hand streghth, or pulling up my shoes by tilting a bit.

 

It's not that I don't have the hand streghth as I am ok lifting couple pound weights when I laying down with my whole body secured on the floor.

 

Do you have something similar?

[[Ar...]]

 

I have a terrible spasm and inhuman pain in my face from which I scream day and night and twitching of all the muscles of my face.

[[RR...]]

Hi arnold,

I have the exact muscle sx as you described. You are the only one mentioned about the muscle sx triggered or intensified by using some body streghth like reaching your computer. I can't use any force when standing such as reaching up for an item on shelf above my chest, or cutting a potato using the little hand streghth, or pulling up my shoes by tilting a bit.

 

It's not that I don't have the hand streghth as I am ok lifting couple pound weights when I laying down with my whole body secured on the floor.

 

Do you have something similar?

 

 

4mom, I think you meant to address me on your reply and not Arnold53.

 

I don't know if what you describe is the same but it looks like it's about coordination and muscle control. My tensions and tremors do occur while being in an "at ease" position but it really accelerates when I do specific things as described. I look like a person with MS or something when I reach for my computer mouse, sit straight on a chair or poor water into a cup, but my last two neurologist assessments have dismissed both ET, Parkinson and MS. I suspect Xanax withdrawal being the instigator. With the strong muscle relaxing properties of that Benzo, perhaps I'm being spastic because my nervous system is screaming for Xanax to be released into my blood stream, after all that's been it's food of choice for over 23 years. But I don't have any evidence so as with SO much related to benzo withdrawal it's all theory and guesswork. This insecurity is killing me. I've had this tremor and muscle tension crap for over a year now.     

[[Ma...]]

@[ R...]

@4mom

 

I have this symptoms so bad I am 100% disabled form it.

Head to toe in chronic dystonic fixed posture.

 

I am scared as hell.

Almost 7 months off and only getting worse.

[[ne...]]

Remember 7 months is not far off and you could have a lot of healing occur soon now. I know...it' awful and 7+months of feeling this stuff SUCKS but we are not long off in benzo world.

[[fl...]]

I just replied to another member who is having muscle tension issues.

 

Muscle tension and pain/burning has been my most persistent and debilitating symptom.  I am now 33 months off and still having serious muscle pain mostly in my lower back and RHS of my body.  There are some days when it is not as bad but the severe pain always returns.

 

Wishing us all relief.

[[An...]]

Most of my muscle tension is in my chest and stomach areas. This may sound crazy, but I wish the tension was in other places on my body. When it is in your chest, your mind stays focused on your heart and that provokes constant 24/7 anxiety.

OP said>>>> This is my biggest challenge cause the tensions and tremors make me wanna return to Xanax just to see if that will give me some much wanted relief, but I know that will set me back alot in terms of staying clean and probably generate more withdrawals over time -

I think we have all had these same thoughts and I personally think you are correct about what a reinstatement would do. Being sick 24/7 and not knowing when or if relief is ever going to come will make you have thoughts like this.

OP said>>>>> but then there's this thought in the back of my mind telling me this is not benzo withdrawal and that I'm crippled for life due to long term Xanax side effects or chronic neurological illness due to that god damn evil Xanax poison running through my blood and brain for so many years. 

Again, my sentiments exactly. These same types of thoughts run through my head all the time. You stopped in April of 2023 so it has not been that long. You need to give it some time. I know, a lot easier said than done. Have you had any windows at all?

[[Ta...]]

Thanks for posting this RR.

I've been running to help get off of meds, but recently I started have severe muscle spasms especially in my feet. Many people become nutrient deficient during Benzo withdrawal. I read that magnesium can help with muscle spasms and pain, but many who are Benzo damaged can't handle magnesium supplements. So I started taking very warm baths with Epsom salts - which contain magnesium. Your body absorbs the mineral thru the skin. This helped me greatly without the negative effects from swallowing supps. I also added baking soda and a few drops of essential oils to the baths which seemed to accentuate relaxation. There's a liquid spray-on form of magnesium that you can get at health food stores. It's supposed to help quickly when rubbed onto muscle pain.

I hope this helps.