Muscles / fat / connective tissue turned to....mush?

[[Pt...]]

I don’t have a better scientific word to explain what’s going on but for the past couple of months I’ve developed a new frightening symptom. The muscles, fat, connective tissue, basically whatever’s between my skin and bones have turned consistency. They feel like “mush”, like gone, evaporated, collapsed. And when I touch it it feels like one of those already bursted bubble wraps, without the air in them Like before. Feels like the cells just collapsed or disappeared. When I step on my feet or sit on my butt, I can literally feel the weight crushing my bones on my skin with nothing in between. Pain.

 

I feel like the wicked witch of the west just melting.

 

Anyone else...?

[[...]]

Like all muscle tissues melted away, and the same time they can be hard rigid like a hard stone when contracting?

 

All my muscles were like that since jumping 1 yr ago. Some parts are getting better gradually feeling and looking a bit more like my old body parts although still far away from the original. The improvements are due to the past 4 month light floor exercise with arms and legs. I feel it's the total waste of muscle due to muscle damage by the drug and lack of use. I was 100% bed ridden for 20 months, with daily constant muscle contraction, spasm, and severe pain allover.

 

Did it happen after your being bedridden for a while? Or it was like that even when you were able to exercise (swim etc if I remember correctly).

 

 

[[Pt...]]

4mom

 

Yes like muscle melting away. But I feel it’s more than just muscles. Feels like the connective tissue surrounding muscles and fat are also gone. When contracting it feels like there’s no middle ground. Sort of like all or none contraction.

 

So u were bedridden during the taper as well extending into post taper?

 

It’s so bizarre that this is happening to me NOW.

 

I agree it’s muscle and nerve damage from drugs, I also think lack of sleep is contributing to the deterioration.

 

Yeah it happened very shortly after becoming bedridden. Like as I was losing function of my muscles I started noticing signs of the softening of the tissues. For the first 7 months I was walking around, swimming, I had 90% mental symptoms. But I could Feel something was “happening” physically too. Like my muscles felt like they weren’t recovering after walking. They weren’t recovering after sleeping. They werent building itself back up. Which is why I feel like sleep may be a cause too.

[[...]]

Yes not just muscle, tendors too. But my tendors are more like a steel cable than melting tissue.

 

Since day 8 on valium ( 5 day use, CT on day 6 then reinstated on day , I have been bedridden for 2yrs. 5-10% off bed now some days. I believe I would have been better if not for the multiple covid attacks since March this yr.

[[...]]

Oh, reinstated on day 8.

[[Pt...]]

Do u just do some stretching exercises on ur bed?

[[...]]

Not stretching as I can't stretch due to whole body extreme rigidity.

 

I do streghth training on floor, using weights for arms and a thign streghth ing tool for legs plus some abdominal stuff.

 

I don't feel streching helps the rigidity anyway, it actually triggers the body twisting from uneven contraction.

 

Did you loose lots weight too?

 

 

[[So...]]

I'm going to say it's a combo of what benzos do to muscle tissue and lack of use. It actually only takes about 2 weeks for muscles to start deteriorating when not in use...and that's in the regular world not counting our benzo bodies!

While I was bedridden for months, it only took a  few weeks for it to disappear. Even f I could flex a a muscle, like flex a bicep or something...it would just be this weird squishy skin and tissue under there and it was soft even while flexing!

Super awful.

My heart actually aches for you guys that have been bedridden for so long :'(

 

PTSD, if there is anyway you can start with ANY physical therapy, I would do it. I started with stuff in the bed, but when I could sit in a chair ...there is a thing called "chair yoga" for people in wheelchairs, I just googled it and started doing it.

[[Pt...]]

Not stretching as I can't stretch due to whole body extreme rigidity.

 

I do streghth training on floor, using weights for arms and a thign streghth ing tool for legs plus some abdominal stuff.

 

I don't feel streching helps the rigidity anyway, it actually triggers the body twisting from uneven contraction.

 

Did you loose lots weight too?

 

I probably lost some but I still have some weight in my upper body. I haven’t weighed myself.

 

 

[[Pt...]]

I'm going to say it's a combo of what benzos do to muscle tissue and lack of use. It actually only takes about 2 weeks for muscles to start deteriorating when not in use...and that's in the regular world not counting our benzo bodies!

While I was bedridden for months, it only took a  few weeks for it to disappear. Even f I could flex a a muscle, like flex a bicep or something...it would just be this weird squishy skin and tissue under there and it was soft even while flexing!

Super awful.

My heart actually aches for you guys that have been bedridden for so long :'(

 

PTSD, if there is anyway you can start with ANY physical therapy, I would do it. I started with stuff in the bed, but when I could sit in a chair ...there is a thing called "chair yoga" for people in wheelchairs, I just googled it and started doing it.

 

The thing is I was doing tons of physical activity before. But even that didn’t stop my muscles and tendons and fat and connective tissue from disappearing.

 

Now that I’m bedridden and Suffering from all these muscle symptoms, even the smallest Movement is just beyond my strength. For example when I get up into the wheelchair and eat, every movement of using the spoon is just pushing my muscles to the extreme. It feels like I’ve already done 50 push ups and am still forcing myself to use my muscles. That’s what it feels like.

 

And the other weird thing is I’m losing muscles in weird areas. My palms and soles. If there’s one area of my body that I haven’t stopped using, it’s my fingers and hands. I need it to type, to drink water, to eat. But even so I’ve lost my muscles in the palm of my hands. And the bottom of my feet.

[[Aj...]]

Yes, exactly this?

Happened really fast in 2018.

And any muscle left has turned to hard, fibrotic, contracted gristle - all dried out and shortness and hard like jerky.

Crushing me. Rigid. Head to toes, front, back and sides.

[[Tr...]]

I found this in an article:

 

Muscles that are not used regularly will quickly become weaker. Indeed, regular use of the muscle is needed to maintain proper and functional muscle strength. This weakening process is due to the fact that, when not use, muscles will loose part of their cells (the less cell there is, the weaker the muscle becomes) and the remaining cell will become thinner and, therefore, less strong. The result is a thinner and weaker muscle (this process is also called muscle atrophy).

[[Pt...]]

I found this in an article:

 

Muscles that are not used regularly will quickly become weaker. Indeed, regular use of the muscle is needed to maintain proper and functional muscle strength. This weakening process is due to the fact that, when not use, muscles will loose part of their cells (the less cell there is, the weaker the muscle becomes) and the remaining cell will become thinner and, therefore, less strong. The result is a thinner and weaker muscle (this process is also called muscle atrophy).

 

That’s not what happens in my case. My muscles were disappearing AS I was walking laps a day. Not due to under use. I use my hand muscles every single day. They are disappearing.

[[Tr...]]

I'm going to say it's a combo of what benzos do to muscle tissue and lack of use. It actually only takes about 2 weeks for muscles to start deteriorating when not in use...and that's in the regular world not counting our benzo bodies!

While I was bedridden for months, it only took a  few weeks for it to disappear. Even f I could flex a a muscle, like flex a bicep or something...it would just be this weird squishy skin and tissue under there and it was soft even while flexing!

Super awful.

My heart actually aches for you guys that have been bedridden for so long :'(

 

PTSD, if there is anyway you can start with ANY physical therapy, I would do it. I started with stuff in the bed, but when I could sit in a chair there is a thing called "chair yoga..." for people in wheelchairs, I just googled it and started doing it.

 

 

I think you are right, and chair-yoga is a good tip! 

[[Pt...]]

I can’t even sit up anymore. My spinal muscles can not hold me up for longer than 5 minutes. My neck muscles give out afterwards few minutes too. Any activity is beyond impossible for me.

[[Tr...]]

I can’t even sit up anymore. My spinal muscles can not hold me up for longer than 5 minutes. My neck muscles give out afterwards few minutes too. Any activity is beyond impossible for me.

 

 

I’m so sorry you feel so bad. Month 16 I couldn’t do anything, and I was bedridden. So I understand that it’s impossible. I hope you feel better soon. 

[[Pt...]]

Thanks t200. I hope so too. This is unreal

[[...]]

I believe you miracle. It's not just the lack of use of muscle causing the atrophy and loss. It's much more frightening.

 

I couldn't stand up still or sit for about 2 yrs for longer than just a minute not only due to lack of  muscle support but more the strong pulling of entire skeleton from contraction. I still can't stand up still now due to the contraction and dystonia it caused but keep walking is ok as the muscle streghth is back.

 

Same reason I can only do floor exercise.

[[Aj...]]

I found this in an article:

 

Muscles that are not used regularly will quickly become weaker. Indeed, regular use of the muscle is needed to maintain proper and functional muscle strength. This weakening process is due to the fact that, when not use, muscles will loose part of their cells (the less cell there is, the weaker the muscle becomes) and the remaining cell will become thinner and, therefore, less strong. The result is a thinner and weaker muscle (this process is also called muscle atrophy).

 

That’s not what happens in my case. My muscles were disappearing AS I was walking laps a day. Not due to under use. I use my hand muscles every single day. They are disappearing.

 

Yes! Mine all atrophied very fast while I was still walking and doing an hour or more of Pilates every day.

 

In the past I have had long periods of time bedridden from ME/CFS and my muscles never wasted like this.

 

This is of a totally different kind - Neuro says it is myopathy.

 

Everything is just hanging off including in hands and face etc.

 

Nails are brittle and ripping, hair falling out.

 

I have gained weight because can’t stop eating but even that is hanging down and only accumulating in stomach and hips.

 

It is like everything is very wrong at a cellular level. No amount of trying to exercise has improved it and now I can’t because of rigidity, dystonia etc.

 

In fact trying to strengthen anything just makes the rigidity/dystonia  and the myopathy worse.

 

 

 

 

[[Pt...]]

I found this in an article:

 

Muscles that are not used regularly will quickly become weaker. Indeed, regular use of the muscle is needed to maintain proper and functional muscle strength. This weakening process is due to the fact that, when not use, muscles will loose part of their cells (the less cell there is, the weaker the muscle becomes) and the remaining cell will become thinner and, therefore, less strong. The result is a thinner and weaker muscle (this process is also called muscle atrophy).

 

That’s not what happens in my case. My muscles were disappearing AS I was walking laps a day. Not due to under use. I use my hand muscles every single day. They are disappearing.

 

Yes! Mine all atrophied very fast while I was still walking and doing an hour or more of Pilates every day.

 

In the past I have had long periods of time bedridden from ME/CFS and my muscles never wasted like this.

 

This is of a totally different kind - Neuro says it is myopathy.

 

Everything is just hanging off including in hands and face etc.

 

Nails are brittle and ripping, hair falling out.

 

I have gained weight because can’t stop eating but even that is hanging down and only accumulating in stomach and hips.

 

It is like everything is very wrong at a cellular level. No amount of trying to exercise has improved it and now I can’t because of rigidity, dystonia etc.

 

In fact trying to strengthen anything just makes the rigidity/dystonia  and the myopathy worse.

 

Yes. Exactly the same.

 

Something went very wrong at cellular level.

 

I cannot use my muscles anymore, and they’re gone, evaporated, dissolved.m

 

Like my bodY became my own poison eating away at the tissues.

 

So weird, u are not off yet right?

[[Pt...]]

I believe you miracle. It's not just the lack of use of muscle causing the atrophy and loss. It's much more frightening.

 

I couldn't stand up still or sit for about 2 yrs for longer than just a minute not only due to lack of  muscle support but more the strong pulling of entire skeleton from contraction. I still can't stand up still now due to the contraction and dystonia it caused but keep walking is ok as the muscle streghth is back.

 

Same reason I can only do floor exercise.

 

Do ur muscles feel scarred?

[[...]]

I believe you miracle. It's not just the lack of use of muscle causing the atrophy and loss. It's much more frightening.

 

I couldn't stand up still or sit for about 2 yrs for longer than just a minute not only due to lack of  muscle support but more the strong pulling of entire skeleton from contraction. I still can't stand up still now due to the contraction and dystonia it caused but keep walking is ok as the muscle streghth is back.

 

Same reason I can only do floor exercise.

 

Do ur muscles feel scarred?

 

Can you describe how a scar Muscle feels?

[[Aj...]]

Any muscle I have left feels li,e it has become fibrotic - like gristle or scar tissue.

It is all dehydrated and contracted like jerky that is being shredded and is raw and rasping.

If I try to move feels like being ripped off of bones where gripping too tight.

[[...]]

PTSD, you could look into taking collagen peptides. There are studies showing increased muscle mass in aging men who were losing muscle. It has been shown to help with sleep also.

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6566884/#idm140316375902992title

 

 

[[Aj...]]

Collagen is very high in glutamate.