Please Help Me Understand

[[pa...]]

Hi Sun....  gosh.. I was so sad reading everything you wrote... Oh Sun... you are not "alone"..  All of us are with you... your emotions are just so raw know... but Sun... know ... that is the "healing" process... you have reached your "spritual self"... that's what will bring you with strength through this whole thing.  That's the same that occurred with me with the Valium.  Know... I see Ron... just like you... going through the same... it tears my heart out... I'm so sad also... I should have known better.  Just know Sun... I'm here for you... just like I'm here for Ron, and just like for Truck and all others.... "You" all are my strength...  actually I think at this point, you, Ron and every bbs are stronger then I am... I feel like I am in quicksand half the time... then my "Irish" from my mom comes through... I will get through it... Its really tough.  Don't worry about crying, like I said to my Ron... God gave us tear ducts for a reason... and its been proven (oh excuse me... by dr's @ Stanford)  the compound of the tears are differant by the emotion... they have "finally" figured and agreed... ITS A HEALING PROCESS!!!  Hello... we women who were labeled "emotional" with our cycles, or after having babies... hello.... truly we were ok - the dr's WERE NOT AND ARE NOT!

 

Sun... please share with all of us... a music video on the site.... you would heal alot of us.... Know, ron and I are your n/california buddies... know i send my love to you.... ron sends his hug... the three of us will one day soon meet in SF... and WALK AND BREATHE...  Its alright to be sad, depressed... Ron is... and I'm at the bottom of the barrell... BUT WE ALL WILL COME UP FIGHTING AGAIN!!.. Love to you Sun.,.. write to me...

[[pr...]]

Thanks for this thread.  I have this same problem too.  I've asked about it on another forum and got the same feedback, apparently it's not uncommon with benzo w/d.  The same stuff with regrets, sadness from the past, et cetera.  I get it really bad sometimes, especially remembering my kids and how I wasn't able to be there for them because i was in such a fog and such a bad state a lot of the time they were growing up.

 

But when I hold my taper for a while and stabilize this goes away, so I know it must be withdrawal.  Still it's really awful! And I even have the same problem with music too. Sometimes I can listen to any music, sometimes only stuff that's new that I didn't listen to in the past, and sometimes no music at all.

 

Oh and I also have terrible spells of loneliness that also go away when I hold and stabilize for a while.  I live alone in a place I just moved to recently so i can get really bad into the loneliness thing.

 

So thanks again for this thread to remind me again that it's w/d and it will go away one day.

 

--Rhi