Valium/Diazepam Support Group

[[Ju...]]

Btw: I am at 10mg--not the 12mg the dr suggested--b/c I know I will have to begin this taper soon enough. And I do feel s/x already but they are bearable. My only point was that sometimes, if things get really bad, a week or two of clarity can make a big difference. For me, just seeing how much the v made me feel better allowed me to calm down a bit about underlying issues and remind myself that IT IS THE DRUGS.

 

Slow and safe is always best, just to be sure...because it takes a few days or weeks for it to catch up with you sometimes and it's very much a case of listening to your body and being willing to adjust thinhs if needed, as tempting as it can be to go fast. Glad your side effects are bearable at the moment, and well done for handling your crossover, you're doing well

[[Mo...]]

This is Hubby - She seems to be better, still shaking a lot and has a hard time walking?? Looks like another couch day for her, and she won't go see a Doc., said they are the ones who put her in the situation!! Which I have to agree with her. Since the last cut she has really hit a wall, so we have been holding until she stabilizes, Doesn't seem to be happening?? Can't tell for sure??

 

Thanks for the interest and the responses!!

 

I can understand why it scared the crap out of you and also why she is totally hesistant to go to a doctor. If she's conscious it sounds withdrawl related, and will hopefully only come in waves and pass over the next few days as she holds...but if she loses consciousness or starts frothing at the mouth lay her gently on her side and keep her airways clear and call a doctor. Having experienced both epilepsy and benzo withdrawls I can personally confirm that they feel very similar at times. Sounds like her brain and body have gone into total shock from withdrawls. Which is both terrifying for you to go through but also confirmation that the meds are coming out of her system successfully. I'm really glad she has a supportive partner like you there with her. Have also heard of several people having similar side effects during benzo withdrawl, and it definitely fits the same description with everything you've said above. As ineffective as this may sound, sleep (even ten minutes here or there), water, and time/holding/waiting out the storm are things which - although not easy- will help her recovery... and then way smaller reductions when she does start eventually reducing again. But for now, definitely hold. You're doing really well to cope with this.

 

I agree with all above...

( sometimes it helps to read this, when multiple people join in like that, from experience )

 

I wanted to also say, I used to shake a lot. During the thick of my withdrawal I was so shaky, I didn't hold a cup. My legs would also give out. I wouldn't be able to go for the bathroom alone. I had the benzo jelly legs. Too weak and too weird in my head.

Also, this weird head feeling made things look weird and made it hard to find balance and walk.

 

What you are describing ....I recognize myself in the symproms from back then.

I'm so sorry she's in this state.

You're doing A marvelous job, Hubby.

 

I often couldn't tolerate anyone touching me, except for stroking my head, on top. Kind of hard. It grounded me, somehow. Also, a heavy blanket can help. If she can tolerate fabric and a duvet then it's worth a shot. I got the tip on here too and it helped me.

 

That's just some things I can think of to maybe aid.. Maybe worth a shot.

My very best,

Moo

 

[[...]]

Hi, this Hubby again,

 

I just want to say that the BB's have restored my faith in my fellow man!! With all the terrible things going on in this World today, it is nice to find a group of people who are willing to support each other!! It doesn't matter what Country, Race, Religion or Sex the person is, the people from the BB are ready to give them help. Thru personal experiences, which is probably the best advice you can receive. Far better than any Doc advice!! Most of the don't know how to handle Benzo WD!!!

 

I especially like the names you people have chosen, very imagenative. We only used our initials.

 

Thanks again, and I'm sure we will be hearing from each other in the near future!! 

[[Mo...]]

Hi, this Hubby again,

 

I just want to say that the BB's have restored my faith in my fellow man!! With all the terrible things going on in this World today, it is nice to find a group of people who are willing to support each other!! It doesn't matter what Country, Race, Religion or Sex the person is, the people from the BB are ready to give them help. Thru personal experiences, which is probably the best advice you can receive. Far better than any Doc advice!! Most of the don't know how to handle Benzo WD!!!

 

I especially like the names you people have chosen, very imagenative. We only used our initials.

 

Thanks again, and I'm sure we will be hearing from each other in the near future!!

 

As hard as it is right now, please know....this is temporary. Nobody can tell you how long....And when it happens you feel like it will never end. But it will.

There is an end to this , promise.

 

You're doing a great job and having your support is the best thing for her, more than anything else.

I can not explain the horror we feel during this time, imagine the people who have a spouse who says to just get over it.

 

Yes, also me...I couldn't have done it without my friends here. 

 

You'll be alright. It will take time. And there isn't a day where she will suddenly feel well. But it'll start with a window, a better period of day...maybe an hour, two hours. Then maybe another wave.

It will come and go. And at one point there will be better times of day . Mostly the evenings for many friends here.

And then you look back a few months and really notice a difference. It'll give hope and a new courage to beat this.

 

[[...]]

This is Hubby,

 

Thanks for the positive reply, just what we needed!! Things are still shaky but we have faith and know this ( someday ) will just be a bad memory!!

 

Since you are Benzo free and still giving others support, we find that super!! Thanks

[[Ki...]]

Hey folks, I have an eqivalency/ tapering question. I was on xanax and ambien to the equiv of about .65 mg and Im mostly crossed over to valium now. Im at around 8 mg V. My " ashton total" would be 13.6. I have seen others - including my doc- who say 10 mg V is enough to cover that. So shes giving me 10 mg a day. I dont want to argue with her because Im hoping shes going to let me stay on it as long as I need to hopefully microtaper off the stuff. So at this point is it better to just get to 10 mg V and just start cutting the remaining xanax or try to start swapping a little more xanax for a little less valium the next few weeks? I do tiny swaps every day or every other day and its working well right now, just headaches. I understand its not ideal but I had to really pester my doc to get valium at all and I dont want to pester her for more, I would rather just save my pestering for a long slow taper. Anyone had to do this before? Any advice much welcome! Thank you!

[[bu...]]

... start swapping a little more xanax for a little less valium...

[[Ki...]]

Ok thanks- I was kinda hoping that was the way to try!

[[fr...]]

  Thats how I did it with Ativan.  It took me about 4 months to cross over.  No rush and I had no s/x at that time.  Now tapering the valium has been a whole different animal.  Good luck.

[Guest [ch...]]

That's also how I did it with Ativan. I was able to cross from 2mg A to 10mg V in just 10 days, and I was fine. I have been tapering the Valium since then.

[[ed...]]

That's nice you were able to cross over to only 10mg Valium instead of the prescribed 20mg.  Shaved some time off of the taper I'd imagine. Good for you!

 

Edit: Actually, looking at your sig, I see your body is able to accept a nice rapid taper. Again, congrats!

[[fr...]]

  I went from 2.5 mg. A to 20 mg V and I wonder if those extra 5 mg. of V would have made my taper better.  Oh well, will never know now but if it works for you its good as you are already ahead of the game.  Good luck.

[[Ki...]]

I started my crossover the first week of Feb, crossingvsmall amounts every other day and Im really glad I did it slowly. I had a really hard time the first month and even now I have very good days and days like today which are nasty. I will give it a try at 10 mg and see how it goes, but I do have enough 2 mg pills from my first script to cover me a few weeks if Im miserable. I hear most people can drop a mg or 2 pretty quickly so at least theres a little backup. It still blows my mind that I was always able to get 6 mo scripts for xanax for 15 years but I have to jump through hoops for even a smaller amount of valium script one month at a time!

[[Ja...]]

Is deducting 2ml per day ( 50 days to reduce 1mg) reasonable taper?

I am microtapering from 5mg of Valium

Been at it first 1ml per day then 1.5ml per day.. I feel good days and bad but I think overall worse just being on these meds

Is that a reasonable taper?

It's weird one night I was up since 3am and today thankfully and blissfully slept until 10am ( I have two kids so this hasn't happened in 6 years.. )

I had to get on mirtazapine and want to lower that too (on 15mg)

Do u suggest tapering both?

I think I need to keep the mirtaz just to cope w withdrawal and function.

I kindled too so this is feeling extra hard bc my Cns has had several shocks.. A panic attack weeks ago that left my body on fire for about 10 days. It just doesn't seem holding is doing any good

I am functional

I work and take care of my kids -- so I am not in bed all day though I would love to be...

Thanks for input. I just feel 8 mos or so is reasonable for 5mg but don't know..

[[Mo...]]

I started my crossover the first week of Feb, crossingvsmall amounts every other day and Im really glad I did it slowly. I had a really hard time the first month and even now I have very good days and days like today which are nasty. I will give it a try at 10 mg and see how it goes, but I do have enough 2 mg pills from my first script to cover me a few weeks if Im miserable. I hear most people can drop a mg or 2 pretty quickly so at least theres a little backup. It still blows my mind that I was always able to get 6 mo scripts for xanax for 15 years but I have to jump through hoops for even a smaller amount of valium script one month at a time!

 

 

Yes, it is crazy, Kittybean...^^

 

I'm glad your cross over worked out okay in the end. It's been tough, huh?

 

Wishing you wide open windows.

 

[[lk...]]

I am finally towards the end of my liquid taper of V.  I am at .15 of my 1ml syringe of 2mgs. So I am not sure how many milligrams that is?  My taper has gone fairly smoothly...until the last couple of nights.  I am having extreme anxiety attacks and I am not sure why now? They seem to hit around 2-3 am and there seems nothing I can do to calm down but just lay there looking at the ceiling and waiting for it to pass. Last night was especially bad. My question is I think I am ready to jump but not sure if I should or just stay put and hope that things level out?  I think the amount is so small that it shouldn't matter?  I guess I am just done with this stuff  :'( any suggestions would be appreciated 

[[bu...]]

I am finally towards the end of my liquid taper of V.  I am at .15 of my 1ml syringe of 2mgs. So I am not sure how many milligrams that is?  My taper has gone fairly smoothly...until the last couple of nights.  I am having extreme anxiety attacks and I am not sure why now? They seem to hit around 2-3 am and there seems nothing I can do to calm down but just lay there looking at the ceiling and waiting for it to pass. Last night was especially bad. My question is I think I am ready to jump but not sure if I should or just stay put and hope that things level out?  I think the amount is so small that it shouldn't matter?  I guess I am just done with this stuff  :'( any suggestions would be appreciated 

  We need to know how you mix your liquid.  How much med (in mgs) do you mix with how much liquid (in mls)?

[[lk...]]

Hi Builder  ,

It is from a compounding pharmacy.  On the bottle it says 2mg/ml suspension.  The syringe is 1ml and I think that equals 2mg.  I am almost at .1 on the syringe.  I hope this helps, sorry I'm not too good at this.

[[bu...]]

Hi Builder  ,

It is from a compounding pharmacy.  On the bottle it says 2mg/ml suspension.  The syringe is 1ml and I think that equals 2mg.  I am almost at .1 on the syringe.  I hope this helps, sorry I'm not too good at this.

 

Then .15ml=.3mg V

[[lk...]]

Thank you so much, couldn't figure that out . I think I'll go down to .1 and then jump.  Do you think that is low enough?

[Guest [ch...]]

Sorry you're having these symptoms, lkingforpeace. What you're describing is exactly what I've experienced, which is that symptoms appear right at the end of a taper, when you're close to 0. My end-of-taper symptoms were exactly what you describe: Insomnia. And/or waking up in the middle of the night with anxiety attacks. These drugs really don't want to let go.

 

If I understand your history, you crossed from .5mgX to 4mgV (which is a big cut). Then you tapered in 2 months to .3mgV. That's actually a pretty fast taper. You were doing well until just a couple days ago. I think what happened is at that point the tapering caught up with you and you are now having withdrawal symptoms.

 

What to do? Well, .3mgV is a pretty low dose. I think you could jump from there. Or you could hold for a bit then do the final bit of tapering .3, .2, .1, 0. Probably it doesn't matter that much. Either way you'll probably have to go through a period where you're having these withdrawal symptoms. The main thing is to get through it and not re-instate. You will heal and the symptoms will subside.

 

Best wishes,

 

Chessplayer

[[Ki...]]

I started my crossover the first week of Feb, crossingvsmall amounts every other day and Im really glad I did it slowly. I had a really hard time the first month and even now I have very good days and days like today which are nasty. I will give it a try at 10 mg and see how it goes, but I do have enough 2 mg pills from my first script to cover me a few weeks if Im miserable. I hear most people can drop a mg or 2 pretty quickly so at least theres a little backup. It still blows my mind that I was always able to get 6 mo scripts for xanax for 15 years but I have to jump through hoops for even a smaller amount of valium script one month at a time!

Thank you Moo. After all you are going through you are still on here helping and encouraging others. You are a true gem. Wishing you much light and peace!

And yes it was tougher than I expected. I never read much about crossing over, its like the period nobody talks much about! Im almost there- maybe 2 more weeks then I will max out on V and taper the little bit of leftover x and hope this is enough to cover it. If so I will post it around in case someone else runs into the same situation. It seems a lot of docs are using a 1-10 instead of a 1-20 conversion.  Very very big difference :/

 

 

Yes, it is crazy, Kittybean...^^

 

I'm glad your cross over worked out okay in the end. It's been tough, huh?

 

Wishing you wide open windows.

[[lk...]]

Hi Chessplayer, thanks for your thoughts I really appreciate them   The reason I went from .5 to 4 mgs of Valium is that was all my doctor would give me. My Doctor must have been absent from med school the day they went over how much xanax equals how much Valium. And I didn't know any better.  That cut was pretty horrible....When I finally stabilized on V, I went by the schedule the compounding pharmacy and my doc figured out.  I guess that's my second big mistake.  The problem is you trust doctors that are supposed to help and heal you, but that is not always the case. I'm learning the hard way.  But I would never reinstate... This isn't my first rodeo and when I c/t'd from xanax the first time, those withdrawal symptoms and what I went thru are imbedded in my mind forever.  This time has been a lot different. But if there is a silver lining to this cloud, I know now what is happening.  I didn't have a clue before, and you would be amazed at the different answers( and what their solutions where) that I got from doctors as to what was happening when I C/T'd from Xanax the first time. I am thankful everyday that I found benzo buddies. I will probably go down from here to 0. I am just hoping the withdrawal symptoms don't last too long.  I check this forum all the time for things I could do or take to make thing a little more comfortable. But I know healing just takes time... :'(

[[He...]]

Hi everyone,

Well tomorrow I'll see the psychiatric nurse practisioner who is the last resort in my current medical system provider as far as Rx any benzo's. She and I have argued; I just want some respect and she seems to feel that my concerns are over-exaggerated. Anyway, I did print her some stuff from Ashton although I will not bring her the whole manual. I did get a month's worth of V on Friday so if it crashes with her I'll seek an independent doc (and pay) and see if I can just get someone to Rx the V. I'm thinking of microtapering about 1 mg/30 days for now and slow that down as my dose gets smaller. 13 mg V now. Thanks to the Buddies (and please excuse me for the poster who referred to us as men; I really prefer people, thanks a lot) for your support this time. I feel ready and as I have no supports in my life I really soak it up on here.

 

I did read some Ashton which I hadn't done since 2013 and I think that a big reason they want to put us on Klonapin is that it has more anti-seizure capability. CYA...especially since they cut us c/t or very fast and most don't seem to care about our symptoms otherwise. They just don't want us seizing. Oh, some really great news. I met a man training to be a nurse, he's getting his master's now and is interested and in the process of working with people with severe brain trauma. I mentioned benzo's and he was aware of the damage that they do, that they should never be Rx'd and that there are thousands of people who need to be gently taken off from the damage which has been done by the Rxing doc's. Wow that gave me a lot of hope! I hope you all got through the weekend well, for some of you maybe you even had some fun. For me I slept a lot but that's OK. I'm looking forward to starting my taper soon. Love and aloha to all, Charlotte

[[so...]]

I'm so sorry that I haven't checked in! My life has been quite chaotic lately and I've been dealing with other people's problems more than my own up until perhaps the last couple of weeks. The good news is that I have been completely off of Ativan for about two months. I'm still on my 10 mg dose of Valium.

 

First question—should my 10 mg of Valium cover withdrawal symptoms from my previous 1.5 mg of Ativan? I've been nearly symptom-free for this entire time, and suddenly I am having icepick headaches in my temples as well as a general headache that is not exactly excruciating, but definitely worrisome. I have dealt with migraines all my life and these aren't migraines. I've got an appointment for a physical on the 27th and I'm going to bring this up to my doc, but I'm afraid of the whole process of that, to be honest. I have a history of vertigo so I'm not looking forward to any possible MRIs or testing, but I'm very concerned about this... The temple pain is something I experienced the whole way down on Ativan, BUT this is MUCH stronger. Extremely painful. Sharp, stabbing. Nearly intolerable. It's just for a couple of seconds though, and I've only had it on a couple of days. But I can feel it threatening to start back up.

 

Second question—my new doc totally supports my slow Valium taper plan, but I've put that off long enough. I think he's going to insist that I start tapering at my next appointment. I'm terrible with math and I want to do the liquid taper. He agreed to tapering 1 mg per month, but he's not at all into the liquid idea. I think I'll need to save the liquid to add to the next day's dose so that I'm not running out of pills, because I'm not sure that he's going to prescribe me more when he thinks I should have pills left, if that makes sense. This is where me being terrible with math comes in. Can someone help me figure out the reductions, as well as how much I'm saving with each dose and how to add that to the next dose?

 

Also, to add to the confusion, I'm on two 5 mg pills per day but I split them in half so that I'm not taking a full 5 mg at once because I think that would knock me out. I assume I'll have to dissolve the full 5 mg pill since cutting them in half isn't exactly very even, with the Valium tablets being so dry and crumbly, and just half that dose too. Once we get down to 8 mg per day, I can ask him for 2 mg tablets and it'll be easier. I tried to get 2 mg tablets at my current dose and he wasn't having it. He said he wasn't sure that he could prescribe it at that dosage. Doesn't make any sense to me, but he's truly a nice doc and very supportive of this taper, so I'm willing to go along with his idiosyncrasies on that.

 

Essentially I'm trying to do a liquid taper without him knowing it's a liquid taper, if that makes sense!

 

If anyone can help with any of the questions I have posted above, THANK YOU so much. I'm overworked, overtired, and in pain, so I'm just deeply grateful for any help that anyone can give. Hope you are all doing well!