Major Depressive Disorder/Treatment Resistant Depression pre-BZDs

[[Ch...]]

Hello,

I have MDD which is also treatment resistant. My MDD onset was dx long before I was prescribed BZDs. I am interested in connecting with anyone else who is in this situation to find out how you are coping, etc. and if you have any special resources to share.

 

I found a good website today that has been helping me as I transition to a new med:

http://www.wingofmadness.com/

 

Hugs and healing to you all,

CB

 

[[fi...]]

I hope you find the right resources, CB.

 

Sincerely,

 

fg

[Guest [vi...]]

which med. are you currently trying CB and what all meds. (other than evil benzos) have you tried in the past?

[[Ch...]]

Thanks all! I've been on a lot of meds and combinations for MDD:

 

Prozac (40 mg - I think was the dose)

Lexapro (20 mg)

Cymbalta (30 mg)

Cymbalta (30 mg) + added Abilify

Cymbalta (60 mg), dropped Abilify

Cymbalta (60 mg), Wellbutrin (can't remember dose)

Cymbalta (60 mg), Wellbutrin, Lamictal (can't remember dose)

Cymbalta (120 mg), Wellbutrin, Lamictal

Lexapro (20 mg), Klonopin 1.5 mg

Lexapro (40 mg), Klonopin 1.5 mg, Dexedrine (can't remember dose) [it is similar to Adderall]

Emsam MAOI 6mg/24 hours

Emsam MAOI 6mg/24 + Seroquel 25 mg

Remeron 30 mg, Seroquel 25 mg

 

I stuck with the Cymbalta for awhile b/c I have a lot of chronic pain issues as well. Also took Lyrica for what doctors originally thought was fibro, but was is actually a genetic condition that causes similar pain.

 

I am currently 2 weeks into the Remeron (30 mg), and am also on the Seroquel (25 mg). I also have taken Topamax (100 mg) for about 5 years for migraine prophy (which has been in conjunction with a lot of the ADs I've been on). I've tried low doses of amitriptyline for migraine prophy as well, rather than as an AD. I have also tried Trazadone (for sleep), but b/c headaches are a sx, I can't tolerate those.

 

It is hard to remember the length of time I've been on the different meds. By far, the MAOI has been the best, but caused severe insomnia. I switched to Remeron recently because, while tapering Klonopin, and after finishing tapering Lyrica, I lost a lot of weight and it was physically painful to eat. The Remeron is supposed to help with appetite and sleep, and it is one of the ADs I haven't tried.

 

There may have been other meds I've tried and just can't remember! I know the ADs definitely help me, and when I got low down on my K taper (to 0.15 mg), I definitely noticed my depression improved. Unfortunately, I had to reinstate (per my doctors), b/c of the eating issue.

 

Is pre-existing depression an issue for you, as well? ADs really help me, they just stop working after awhile, and I have to up the dose, add things or switch things.

 

Thanks for your thoughts,

CB

 

[[ja...]]

CB,

 

Look into ketamine treatment or TMS or DBS. Also be sure they have checked you for the MRTHR DNA issue. It is a test of your DNA where if you are positive for it, it will explain why you have treatment resistant MDD. And your treatment would then NOT be an AD, but a special prescription form of folate called l-methyl folate or brand name Deplin.

 

Studies show long term prognosis on ADs is not very good. You would be best served with a pdoc who is into more progressive strategies than just throwing more pills at you. Benzo's can easily worsen MDD so they are counterproductiive.

 

Again all my opinion. Just hope I give you some help.

 

Jae

[Guest [vi...]]

hi CB,

 

no i did not have depression prior to benzo use but have developed depression 'cos of long term benzo use and have had to go on a ssri. as you probably know, benzos exacerbate your depression so it is definitely one thing you ought to quit (and you have noticed decrease in depression when down to 0.15 K). you've tried many of the popular ssris and MAOI. i take remeron though not a therapeutic dose (i take it to sleep). many have reported great success with it. i am praying it works for you.

 

i'm pretty sure if you again taper off the benzo, you will notice a > 50% reduction in your depression. that's probably the best "medicine" for you now.

 

 

 

 

[Guest [...]]

Yay Cherry

 

so glad you are getting some relief of something.  Have to say you are one determined girl and you are willing to give anything a go to get better.  I really admire your determination and although things get tough you keep on keeping on.

 

I certainly looking back definately had a lingering depression you know years of disappointments catch up and its funny how the bad memories are more powerful than the good weird hey.  I just know you are going to get there. 

 

Cheers

 

Lizzy

[Guest [vi...]]

also, CB, yes remeron will give you the munchies. but remember that remeron (mirtazapine) loses it's anti histamine effect at higher doses. so the higher you go, the less sedating and appetite boosting it will be. you can still overcome this by taking most of your dose at night and 15 mg in the morning. that way you will be hungry (also a bit drowsy -- but that will go away in weeks) all day -- i've read about people doing this.

 

once remeron boosts your appetite, you can again contemplate tapering down your K. that will help you.

 

hugs,

 

rahul

[[Ch...]]

Thank you all for your replies. I also got some helpful feedback on the ECT thread. I am just going to reference the post I made there, to bookmark it for myself, and for others that are interested:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=52325.msg701637#msg701637

 

I have been on the Remeron at 30 mg for about 3 weeks now. It is helping with sleep and appetite, but I'm not sure it is doing much for depression. I am going to speak with my p-doc about increasing the dosage, and splitting it so I could take some of it at night for sedation. I also may need to give it some more time to work.

 

As @jaegerwilk mentioned, ketamine is showing promise for MDD (as is scopolamine) - see the link above, where I posted more info about that. I have a lot of hope in these new treatments, too.

 

And, definitely, once I am able to gain enough weight to start tapering the Klonopin again, I know I will see some improvement in my depression. When I was able to get down from 1 mg to 0.15 mg, that was the most significant improvement I noticed. I am currently back at 1.5 K per my doctors due to weight loss. Anyway, this is just a battle we keep on fighting because we want to live, and live productive lives.

 

Thank you all again for your feedback. And for others that fall into this category, feel free to contribute to the discussion. I know a lot of people develop or experience depression while tapering, but I think some of us fit into a different category, having severe depression prior to benzo usage, and it's good to connect.

 

Best,

CB

[[sp...]]

i had depression pre-benzos.

 

i am making changes by:

 

2) eating much much better.  veggies, whole foods...the whole nine yards.  very little sugar.  what's your diet like?

 

3) CBT

 

 

[[Ch...]]

Thanks for your thoughts on this.

 

Yes, I eat a whole foods, organic diet with lots of fruits and veg, and limited sugar. I cannot eat processed foods b/c of severe migraines, so my diet in whole, is pretty healthy, although because I am on the Remeron and need to gain weight before I can taper the K again, I am eating more carbs and things that sound good, rather than the bland things I had been eating during my tapers (due to severe nausea).

 

I have not had CBT, but I have done DBT and see a therapist once a week for talk-therapy. I use DBT skills regularly to help cope with panic and anxiety, and depression to some extent.

 

One thing that is missing right now, is exercise. Because of severe chronic pain issues, I am not able to do much. I had been going to a warm water therapy class that combined yoga, pilates, stretch and strengthening, etc. as recommended by my pain management doctor. Due to illness caused by the K taper, I haven't been able to do that anymore. Because I've also just switched ADs (I am 3 weeks into the Remeron) and had to go two weeks off my MAOI, my level of depression is severe enough that minimal physical activities totally exhaust me.

 

Articles about diet and depression: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression-and-diet/AN02057

Articles about exercise and depression: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression-and-exercise/MH00043

DBT: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dialectical_behavior_therapy

CBT: http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=About_Treatments_and_Supports&template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=7952

 

[[sp...]]

well it seems like you're doing everything right.

 

Mindfulness  is also  a very promising way out of depression.