Feeling bad or sick but not sick?

[[To...]]

My wife says a lot when I ask her how she feels over the last almost 5 years that she feels horrible yet not in a way that I wouldn’t  understand that’s never anything she’s felt outside of this and it can morph and change almost daily… Almost like she just doesn’t feel well all of the time, a feeling of unhealthiness… She feels awful in general but can’t explanation it, overall feeling like crap?

Anyone else feel like this?

She’s had tons of blood work (vitamins, minerals, auto immune tests, you name it because her health anxiety is so bad) and all and beyond this she’s healthy and eats an extremely healthy diet.

Just curious if anyone else feels “bad” each day beyond the normal anxiety, fear, tinnitus, and all the other horrible symptoms you are all fighting through.

Thanks!

[[Co...]]

Yes, I have not felt well since starting this in October 2022.

[[wi...]]

It truly breaks my heart to see others and myself that this hell is from so called safe drugs. 

Yes, I feel attacked every day and nothing is helping give me relief.

The suffering is inhumane. Unbelievable not only to others witnessing it from the periphery, but to we who are afflicted as well.

 

I HOPE I will heal, but I'm terrified I won't witnessing those who have been dealing with this misery for years.

 

 

[[To...]]

It truly breaks my heart to see others and myself that this hell is from so called safe drugs. 

Yes, I feel attacked every day and nothing is helping give me relief.

The suffering is inhumane. Unbelievable not only to others witnessing it from the periphery, but to we who are afflicted as well.

 

I HOPE I will heal, but I'm terrified I won't witnessing those who have been dealing with this misery for years.

 

My wife was unfortunately given a bad medical advice to taper too quickly and then do a rapid detox so that could be why she’s five years out and fear and health Anxiety has caused many setbacks. Please do not worry. I know in my heart that she will get better one day and you will too. Just keep holding on because you never know what the future will bring.

[[Co...]]

You are a very sweet husband. I was in minor cortisone withdrawal and suffering from impulsiveness ,tinnitus,anxiety for the first time in my life but getting better and better and my dad could not even stay positive for 2 months before rushing me confused onto this mess. I felt my healing then every week,I was doing so well and so sure I would have been amazing by now. He couldnt stay calm for 2 months while doctors had said the first 3 to 4 months are the worst. You are awesome!

[[Bi...]]

I'm having big windows but yes when in a wave I just feel unwell.. sometimes I can't even describe how it feels entirely.

[[dj...]]

Yes I can relate to that.  For a very long time I felt like I had no sense of well-being whatsoever.  I had a very time describing it.  It was a mix of the below I believe.  I would call these more latent symptoms that weren’t apparently obvious to me.

 

1) a general lack of energy

2) subtle almost imperceptible anxiety - like I wasn’t having anxiety over anything in particular but always had a crappy feeling about things. 

3) very subtle muscular tension - this was a full body thing.  I wasn’t in pain or pulling muscles and didn’t necessarily feel tense but I always felt like I couldn’t get comfortable

4) anhedonia and blunted emotions - nothing gave me pleasure

5) DPDR - this one is obvious but it just dulls everything

 

For all the above, “normal” people are typically at a 0 out of 10 at any given moment.  For me, it was like I was constantly at a baseline 2 out of 10 which sometimes isn’t enough to notice but it is enough to make things suck.  But, due to having a compromised nervous system, in a really stressful situation, a normal person may go from a 0 to 3 anxiety level or get sort of energy zapped.  For me, I could go from a 2 to 8 anxiety level fairly easily which is absolutely freaking the hell out but not enough to get committed to a hospital.  With the energy, it was like I got massively fatigued and needed to lie down or I would die, whereas abnormal person just feels kind of tired and blah.

[[Ho...]]

I totally understand what your wife says. The closest I can come to is that I feel like I'm coming down with something. (Low energy, feeling queasy, no appetite, low spirits, metallic taste and the feeling that my skin is burning on the inside. Also dizzy and ears ringing madly.)

 

That said, I can fake it. No one else knows I feel like this, and if I get busy and involved in something, it helps. It doesn't go away, but when I can get my head into something I don't notice it as much.

 

I'm about 8.5 months post-jump and it gets better every day. Not good yet, although I've had a few hours when I've felt almost normal, so I'm getting there. I trust the your wife will too!

[[dj...]]

I totally understand what your wife says. The closest I can come to is that I feel like I'm coming down with something. (Low energy, feeling queasy, no appetite, low spirits, metallic taste and the feeling that my skin is burning on the inside. Also dizzy and ears ringing madly.)

 

That said, I can fake it. No one else knows I feel like this, and if I get busy and involved in something, it helps. It doesn't go away, but when I can get my head into something I don't notice it as much.

 

I'm about 8.5 months post-jump and it gets better every day. Not good yet, although I've had a few hours when I've felt almost normal, so I'm getting there. I trust the your wife will too!

 

Well put.  Another way I would describe things — in my experience — is that things just feel wrong.  They don’t feel right mentally, physically, or cognitively.  And it’s a mix of a lot of different symptoms that aren’t necessarily raging, but just sitting there at this mild level all the time.  Like I said above, for me it’s some mix of low energy, anxiety, muscular tension/pain/soreness, DPDR and anhedonia/loss of emotions.  Just sort of constantly there.  And while one symptom may subside at times, others will become a little more prevalent. 

 

The loss of emotions is the strangest thing and something even psychiatrists and therapists don’t understand, but it is very real.  It happened almost overnight for me in the week or two after jumping.  All of a sudden my emotions were sort of gone.  When you can’t get excited for things and feel pleasure, joy, or happiness, it’s hard to say you feel good.  I can fake it out in public in short spurts, and even laugh and stuff, but it still feels sort of robotic.