My ongoing battle

[[el...]]

Missy, go to this link, turn on this audio, and lay down and do this meditation.

 

I would just not think about cutting quite yet. You are too raw. It will do you no good to cut in this state. I won't tell you how long to hold, but you should at least feel reasonably stable. That may be in just a few days, or maybe longer. Take it one day at a time. 

[[Th...]]

Missy,

 

Get some ensure with protein and try to drink that. I put mine in a blender with ice and a banana or frozen cherries. Try to drink chicken broth, or chicken noodle soup. I know how hard it is to eat when anxious, been there myself. Get some chamomile tea, it helps some with the anxiety (I use two tea bags). Then try to eat slow, one bite at a time.

 

Take care!  

 

[[Mi...]]

I am really, really sick.  I took my dose and it made me feel worse.  Now I'm scared to death that I may be toxic.  Palms are red and itchy, sweating, brain zaps, just sick.  I wish I'd never reinstated.  I don't know if this w/d will ever go away now.

I think I'm goingto have to quit my job tomorrow. :'(

[[Je...]]

Why don't you try calling in sick and see if you stabalize?  The w/d will end...it feels like it won't...but it will.  I can't emphasize enough how bad off I was...and how good I am doing now.  I was like you....feeling like it would never end...but it does...and it will for you too!!

 

Love,

 

Jen

[[TP...]]

I agree. Please don't make any rash decisions that you may live to regret.  I'm sure you will be better one day and look back on this as all a rather vague and fuzzy nightmare.

[[Co...]]

Missy,

 

I'm trying to understand your situation. You finshed tapering off about six months ago; starting drinking early this year; and have been taking 1mg Valium per day for about 12 days? If this is the case, and the increase in dose, you are safe to just quit. It might be anticipated that quitting could make you feel unwell, but it is a low dose, and you have been taking taking for a short period of time. Plus, as I explained before, it takes Valium time to build up in your system anyway. Since you report that you feeling worse the more you take it (this is not unheard of), maybe you should just stop taking it. People taper from high doses of Valium and regularly quit at 1mg without major problems. Although I cannot give you any guarantees, but you might well fair better by quitting now. It will take some weeks for the Valium to fully leave your system, so quitting from 1mg is not as sudden as it might appear - there is a natural, in-built, taper effect when quitting from a low dose of Valium.

[[Mi...]]

I'm afraid to just quit.  It took me 3 months to taper from just 2 mg, and I had a ct experience once before from Xanax.  If I'm having bad w/d now, if I just quit, won't it make it worse?

 

Or, should I do a rapid taper, like go to .5 mg for next few days then quit?  I really don't know what to do.  I just know I am i agony.

[[Mi...]]

Also,  since I was drinking heavily, would that have been the same as taking large amounts of benzo's?  Which would explain why I am having severe w/d on only 1 mg?

[[Co...]]

Hi,

 

It took you two months to quit from 2mg of which benzo?

[[Mi...]]

It took 3 months to taper off of valium ( 2 mg) once I was corssed over.  Originally I was on Xanax, did a c/t, ER doc put me on Klonopin, tried to taper from that 6 weeks was very unsuccessful, psychiatrist put me on valium 2 mg to taper and that took 3 months.

 

I woke up this morning very confused and disoriented.

[[Co...]]

Hi Missy,

 

I still have problems with alcohol after five years of being benzo-free. I started drinking again about 18 months ago (modest amounts and infrequently, but stopped again last summer after I determined that it still has deleterious effects upon me. This has happened before, and it always takes me a long time to recover from it. Perhaps what you are going through is from your use of alcohol, not Valium? There is no way for me to know; you are in best postion to determin the cause of your recent difficulties. One thing's for sure, do not attempt to drink any more alcohol until your are confident of being over this. Even then, be very cautious until you are sure that you are OK to drink again. In your shoes, I think I'd probably wait a year or more after you feel recovered before considering drinking again. I doubt that I'll ever trying drinking again. I appear to be sensitised to alcohol in way that I never was in the past.

[[Mi...]]

I don't EVER plan on drinking again.  Had 2 seizures this morning.  My doctor has told me that unfortunately, I am going to have to go through a taper plan off of valium again due to the fact that I messed up when I started drinking.  He has put me on 3 mg valium at night and 1 mg valium in morning. He said that because I started drinking, I totally screwed up my brain again, and now I have to start at a higher dose to stabilise and then start the taper all over.  I just sat there in the hospital and cried.  He wants me to stay at this dose for at least two weeks, or until I somewhat stabilise (which I wonder if I ever will stabilise) then cut .5 mg for two weeks, and then we have to see where we go from there.

 

I am such an

 

Yes, it's a lesson learned, but at such a terrible, terrible price.  I pray no one else makes the same mistake I did.

[[bo...]]

Missy

I know your upset , but trust me starting at 4mg of Valium to taper from is quite low, many people here start there taper from 30 or 40 mg equivalents of Valium, so if you can ,take some solace from that fact.

Take care

Bobers

[[Th...]]

Hi Missy,

 

Please don't be so hard on yourself. You needed to do this to get stable again. It sounds like your dr. is working with you and understands your situation. Life is full of "what ifs" and "if only". You're on the right path again.

 

Take care! 

[[Je...]]

I agree.  What's done is done...no point in beating yourself up.  Just concentrate on the task at hand...getting off benzo's.  You're on your way!!

 

Love,

 

Jen

[[Mi...]]

Yesterday evening I took my dose, and it helped for about  two hours, then I becaome incredibly anxious.  Woke up after 3 hours sleep drenched in sweat, then stayed awake the rest of the night.

 

I read that people who reinstate often have paradoxical reactions and can't ever stabilise.  Anyone know if this is true or not?

 

Also, I have to have thiamin injections for the next five days because my level was at .5, when it should be between 4 and 9.  Had my first shot at 12:30 yesterday.  Could this be making me worse?

 

Has anyone else had experience with reinstating?   

[[ru...]]

Many folks have problems reinstating and... some have trouble with B vitamins, makes them anxious. Isn't thiamine a B vitamin?

 

Sorry to hear your night wasn't so good. I hope things are better for you soon.

 

rufus

[[Mi...]]

Took my 1 mg this am.  Got to work.  2 hours later had to come back home.  Bad sick.

 

Can anyone tell me how long I need to stay on the 4 mg before I can begin a taper?  1 week? 10 days? 2 weeks? Also, should I just take all 4 mg at night?

 

Really need help.  Terrible anxiety today.  Crawling out of my skin.

[[Th...]]

Missy,

 

So sorry you're still feeling bad. I believe it takes a little time for the valium to get built up enough to help, but I am not one that has used it so someone else should be along with more expertise. Your doctor said you should stay on this amount for two weeks to stabilize, before you start your taper. At this point, just try to hang in there! 

 

[[...]]

Missy, I am only a buddie so don't have much knowledge, but will throw out ideas. They can chime in and tell you which ones are bad.

 

Honey, you are really suffering. I know b1 is one that is very stimulating....even by month. Maybe the shots are just too much for you. Maybe try taking by mouth becaseu your levels are really low? Are your other b vits low. I know that people advise you not to take one b vit at a time, but to take them in complex. Why is level of b1 low? That is a bell to me... What is cause of this? Maybe that is answer to this whole puzzle.

 

I know that zyprexa is good for manic episodes and is said to calm down the worse mania in only an hour or less. But this is a mood stabalizer, and another drug added to the mix. Do you think this anxiety is mania? Have you ever taken zyprexa and just not mentioned it yet? The thing is that something must be done to stabalize you. I know that zyprexa and benzo will knock you out.

 

I can't follow, how much valium you are on. Is it 1 or 4mg. In Ashton manual it says it is very hard to move from klonopin to valium. Wonder if that was a mistake?

 

Just throwing out ideas here for moderators who really know.

 

Would it help you to take a walk when you are real nervous and get rid of the energy? A brisk walk with hubby with a lot of talk along the way might help.

 

Passionflower is supposed to work on then same receptors as benzo's. Maybe taking that would help calm you down.

 

Lot of ideas here. I bet moderators will write soon.

 

Keep writing here. It helps.

 

 

All I do know is one thing...you are at the right place to get help.

 

A psych ward is terrible, I've been there and it should be avoided unless you are dangerous to yourself. They do nothing for you personally there. You become part of a pack, and you rarely see the doctor, and end up under lock...like in a prison. If you are having mania or nervousness there, they will do nothing for you. That is what I had until doctor put me on zyperxa and klonopin (by pure chance after days of not sleeping). Calmed me right down and I could sleep...after like 14 days straight of mania...due to cold turkey of 4mg of klon to nothing in one day. Does this sound like you...mania?

 

Okay, moderators correct any advice I have given.

 

Wow, am I and everyone else pulling for you hard.

 

INB

 

 

 

 

[[Mi...]]

Thiamine extremely low because I was drinking for 3 months.  QUit 3-9.  Incredible w/d started 3-10.  Doc reinstated on 1 mg valium.  Seized yesterday.  He upped it to 4 mg.  I feel terrible and could not stay at work today.  Have to take the Thiamine shots because levels supposed to be 4-9, mines was less than .5.

 

Thansk for support.

[[st...]]

sorry you are going threw so much i hope you feel better soon

[[Co...]]

Hi Missy,

 

Your blood levels will have stabilsed within a month, and then it is up to how you feel. If you are looking to quit, then starting sooner rather than later would be better.

[[Mi...]]

I definately want to quit.  So, wait about a month to stabilize, then start the taper?

[[Th...]]

Hi Missy,

 

Just wanted to drop in to see how you are doing? Are you feeling any better?

 

Keep us updated. Take care!