90 DAYS!!!

[[Pa...]]

Thank you for checking in!  Wow!  Your heart rate is 80 not on a beta blocker?  That’s good!  My heart rate will go from 120 to 57 on a beta blocker. I have to take the beta blocker every day. I couldn’t not take it. The PVCs were too vast. They have calmed down quite a bit now though. I still get moments of high heart rates though. My windows kind of switched now though. Now I get my windows in the mornings, which is odd because most people have horrible mornings. But I have very mild dizziness upon waking and everything is fine until around 10AM then the anxiety hits until 5pm.  It has lessened though so the anxiety really isn’t too bad. And my evenings are so-so now. Not symptom free but some mild dizziness and some moderate high heart rate, no adrenaline surges or anything like that. I believe it was day 95 and it was like boom....  just switched courses on me. I’m so happy you’re feeling better!  Every time I’m there’s even the slightest bit of relief from a symptom it an amazing feeling!  Hopefully we will get more and more in the coming days!  😊

[Guest [fl...]]

Hi Paxia, just checking in after a bit of a break. On day 91 for me, my palps were gone by 99%. I had like 3 a day. My heart rate rapidly decreased and my whole system crashed because the adrenaline just decided to leave! It was great and also insane. I had 3 glorious low anxiety windows and 3 heinous high anxiety waves! I think that the adrenals are sputtering. Now today, day 98, I'm back in a window - a nice one after morning anxiety. My pattern is similar. OK mornings (anxiety 1-2 out of 10) then hard at 10am - 5pm, then gone. Except today. It was 10am - 12, now gone at 2pm. I feel like it was 3 months of hell and now I am starting the roller coaster of yay! no! yay! no! haha.

[[Pa...]]

Yeah that’s the same with me although I’ve had a rough 9 days so far and still continuing.  I am also on Metoprolol daily though. I had a ridiculous amount of PVCs the first three months. I took a CoQ10 tablet yesterday? Maybe the day before....??because I’d been feeling so bad for so long and I think it set me back. Now I’ve been in an adrenaline surge for most of the day and my blood sugar has been a consistent 160 for most of the day with no drops.  Ugghh. I’m so happy you are having some great windows there!  That’s amazing !  Maybe it’s from those nasty waves you had, you healed a bit. 😊  I hope you continue to get those nice windows.  It’s so nice to hear from you still. 😊❤️

[Guest [fl...]]

Hi Paxia,

 

I used to think supps gave me waves, but now that I take everything consistently, I think it might be coincidence. I take about 15 supplements. I research each one, then make a decision. These include a pharmaceutical grade multivitamin, curcumin, broccoli, EGCG, astaxanthin, ginger, lavender, taurine, magnesium, phosphatidyl choline, theanine, Kava and sometimes DHH-B. I know that some of these supposedly interact with GABA, but I just don't think that these weakling herbs are going to harm my receptors, based on research. Kava has been used to help withdrawal from benzos with success. Only DHH-B actually acts at the benzo receptor site, so it's the only truly risky supplement. That said, I think it saved me, so there's that! I take CoQ10 100mg twice daily with PQQ 20mg twice daily.

 

I had a PVC about every 4-6 heart beats, so I feel your PVC pain...I had a beta blocker, but just didn't want to take it.

 

I hope you feel better soon!

[[Pa...]]

Oh wow!  That’s a lot of supplements. I’m impressed!  A lot of people on here would be bed bound from taking all of those. Look at your system just rocking it though!  Good for you mama!  Thanks for the well wishes. We shall see about this CoQ10. Maybe I’m just in a really bad wave and it’s lasting longer than normal. Who knows anymore.  Either way I’m glad we are both on a strong path to healing.

[[Ba...]]

Hello, everyone! )

 

I would like to ask you about waves. I'm still on my 1st month, I've got yesterday with no anxiety and mental problems at all.I wasn't scared of everything, could watched a movie without problems(you know what I mean, almost everything scares us) felt almost myself, but with many psysical symproms. So I would like to ask you about your windows. What do you mean by them? All they just gone or?

 

Thanks in advance!

[[RS...]]

Windows are when your symptoms vanish or are severely reduced.  The waves are when your symptoms flare up.

 

I’m in a wave now.  Hard time sleeping, burning skin... 

 

This cycle of windows and waves is an indication of healing.  At one month though I had no windows.  Indeed, I was a mess and wondered how I would get through the day.  But if you got a break in your symptoms,that’s great! Enjoy it!

[[Ba...]]

Thanks for your reply!

I couldn't say thay my symptoms jusy fade away, but most of them were managable. I think symptom like bright lights can't just dissappeard?

[[RS...]]

That’s great that you are seeing some relief this early in the process.  All the best to you!

[Guest [fl...]]

Paxia, I was just thinking about you, friend, since we are so close in terms of timeline and history. How are you doing? I’m having windows and waves like a roller coaster! Oh my gosh. The waves are so viscous maybe because the windows are so nice! I had windows and waves all day! Usually it’s either a window or wave day. So weird! Just thought I’d say hi!

[[Pa...]]

Hey mama!  I haven’t had a window in over 3 weeks!  It’s been constant hell!  I’ve felt like chewed up bubble gum stuck in the crevice of an old tennis shoe for weeks now. My windows just went poof!  I’ve tried to stay positive about it telling myself that it just means I’m going through more healing but it’s getting unbearable. I’m glad you are still trudging through doing amazing!!!  😊❤️

[Guest [fl...]]

Paxia, I’m so sorry! It’s deep healing that your brain is going through! Have symptoms gone down at all in that time at all? What are your main symptoms? Maybe one of us can offer advice. Well, time IS the healer, but sometimes there’s a little help out there. Hang in there!!!

[[Pa...]]

A bit but not much.  It’s just like one big constant wave!  I’m trying to stay positive about it but it gets taxing after awhile. Hopefully when/if I come out of this I’ll have a nice big wonderful window!!! 

[Guest [fl...]]

Fingers crossed for you!

[[Pa...]]

Fingers crossed for you!

 

Thanks mama!  I just realized I repeated my reply.  HA!  Apparently my memory is locked in this wave too.  Lol! 

[Guest [fl...]]

Paxia! How are you doing these days? I am finally seeing a big reduction in symptoms - I hope it sticks! The only weird thing - my palpitations are back. I think it's hormonal...

[[Pa...]]

Paxia! How are you doing these days? I am finally seeing a big reduction in symptoms - I hope it sticks! The only weird thing - my palpitations are back. I think it's hormonal...

 

I’m sorry to hear your palps are back!  Those are the worst!!!  I always feel like I’m going to have a heart attack with them.  I’m still in a very bad setback from that CoQ10 that I took for two days.  It made me feel horrible !!!!  And still lingering.  I’m so excited that you are doing so well!  That’s AMAZING!  ❤️😊

[Guest [fl...]]

Oh no!!! I wonder why your body didn't like CoQ10? Maybe all of the mitochondria got going, including the ones making things that your brain doesn't like. I hope it passes soon! I am hoping my progress sticks. It's such a scary process.

[[Pa...]]

Oh no!!! I wonder why your body didn't like CoQ10? Maybe all of the mitochondria got going, including the ones making things that your brain doesn't like. I hope it passes soon! I am hoping my progress sticks. It's such a scary process.

 

I don’t know. Apparently searching through some old threads, it’s kind of like magnesium.  It works for some people and makes some people worse.  I am just one that apparently can not handle any supplements.  Magnesium revs me up and makes me worse too. Lesson learned, this chick right here is staying away from ALL supplements!  Lol

[[Be...]]

Paxia,

great work on being 90 days benzo free!

keep going! you can do this and in the end it will be so worth it!

virtual hug to you

[Guest [fl...]]

Paxia, I have been gone for a while, how are you doing these days? My palps are mostly gone, but new panic attacks at night. Some things are better (chemical anxiety), but still feel very overstimuated all the time so can't function yet. I am getting very depressed about it, even wondered about reinstating and starting over. sigh...

[[Pa...]]

Paxia, I have been gone for a while, how are you doing these days? My palps are mostly gone, but new panic attacks at night. Some things are better (chemical anxiety), but still feel very overstimuated all the time so can't function yet. I am getting very depressed about it, even wondered about reinstating and starting over. sigh...

 

Month 4 was a hard month for me. It was like being back in acute but not quite 100% back into it. So it was rough. I just started month 5 and it’s okay. It’s definitely not as bad as the first 2 months. But it’s not 100% better either. It’s more manageable though.  I know your pain mama because I’m not that far ahead of you. But try to tuff it out!  I remember the beginning of month 4 it was so bad I was thinking of reinstating too. My organs were showing signs of failing because of all of the glutamate hitting hard. But I pushed through without reinstating and you can too!  Month does get a bit better, it’s definitely more manageable. Please IM me if you need to talk a bit more privately or anything you might need. You’re a fighter and you’ve fought this far. 😊❤️