RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE

[[Fa...]]

"You really need to stay off the internet"

 

This one is actually not terrible advice. I left the internet message boards for many months during withdrawal bc of nocebo effects. I felt better within days.

[[...]]

100 lamictal.15 abilify.1500 depacote 2 klonopin.....

You are on a few mild drugs....I have patients who are on 8or 10 drugs...so dont be scared.....

Your brain is not producing right chemicals......

 

Everyone, please note:  This thread is from early 2011, almost 4 years ago...

 

....so most of the OP's are no longer on the forum.

 

ESTHERSMOM is digging for old treasures, reminds me of my grandma. (only joking ).

 

:laugh:   This thread is indeed a treasure, good work, EMom!

 

Okay, here's one I hesitated putting out there ... too much info and all, but what the heck, it's just too good!

 

On AD, sitting in front of her with bruises tattooed all over my body ...

Me:  "I'm literally hemorrhaging during my monthly cycle.  The other day I bloodied up the whole work bathroom and had to remove my undies and throw them in the garbage!"

Her:  "Why didn't you just take them home and wash them?"

[[sa...]]

Psych said to me even though he never knew me before ct klonopin ,  "this us who you have always been you just didn't know it. "

[Guest [Mi...]]

I was told by multiple pdoc's over a 30 year period that every drug in the bipolar cocktail was "fixing a chemical imbalance."

 

Am I fixed yet?   

[[Si...]]

After asking my GP to take a look at the Ashton Manual:

 

"Yeah, I've checked it out and I think it's outdated. It's from the 90s."

 

My (ex) addictionologist upon hearing that I want to taper:

 

"Of course you can try to come off of the Klonopin, but why do you want to suffer? There's no need to suffer that much. You might as well take it for life."

 

The same addictionologist about the dangers of Klonopin:

 

Me: "I've heard that Klonopin can be dangerous and addictive."

 

Doc: "No, no, it's only dangerous when you exceed your prescribed dose. That's drug seeking behavior."

 

Me: "Hmm. Is it true that the therapeutic range is .5 mg to 10 mg?"

 

Doc: "Yes."

 

Me: "So if I take 1 mg per day instead of my prescribed .5 mg without your knowledge, that's dangerous, but if I take 8 mg a day by your order, that's not?"

 

Doc: "Exactly."

 

[[...]]

Lamictal 100mg its so therapeutical dose,,,,,you know i have people on 400 lamictal!!!!

 

dumb lithuanian w&&&re , your brain is not producing one cell....

you are a such typical schizophrenic that even non psychiatrist can tell you that!!!!!!

 

i hate her so much....

also i hate her even more , when i saw her changing her real fur coats.......

 

 

no comments

[[bu...]]

ME:  Doc, I keep increasing my dose, but always develop tolerance to the new dose after 4-3 weeks.  I'm at 15 mg and really don't think it will help

 

DOC:  I know you think 15 mg V is a big dose, but it really isn't.  You just haven't reached your therapeutic dose.  You really need to escalate up to 40 mg/day.

[[sl...]]

Doctor- "Why are you stressed?"

 

Me thinking to myself... Hello? what world do you live in?

[[Ch...]]

When I had an appointment for something else but informed her I had tapered down to .25 she said, 'You have a mildly anxious personality.  Why don't you just stay on .25mg of Xanax for maintenance?' 

[[Ga...]]

the first doc i saw said i had a chemical imbalace. he knew me about a half hour

 

one told me i was paranoid because i kept my sunglasses on. i tried to tell him i was sensitive to the fluorescent lighting im sure its in my records.

[[xe...]]

"2mg of clonazepam a day is a mild dose"

[Guest [Or...]]

"I believe you. You are going through a discontinuation syndrome from your medication" - It's a GOOD quote. But, nonetheless rediculous and unexpected. Well, compared to most things people get told. Lol

[[Hi...]]

"Valium has no withdrawal because the half life is so long it tapers itself" wtf

" paws do not exist. It is a myth" addiction speacialist

While in full on violent convulsions in er eyes rolled back in head, foaming at the mouth, bp 190/120 er doc tells dad " he needs intensive therapy this is all in his head" (i had just got released from a detox center so there was no way i could be in withdrawal)

"Phenobarbital is not addictive" wtf....

Ill think of some more

[[hu...]]

"You only took 0.5 mg clonazepam for a few months, it can't be causing any withdrawal, some people have to take these/anti depressants for life"

 

"You are having head pressure and neck, shoulder tension because you did not take clonazepam long enough, a higher dosage for a longer duration will definitely help"

 

[Guest [Ma...]]

"If you wish to discontinue Klonopin then you become the expert, I prescribe for life!"  Nice business model .....

And, "klonopin is nothing like Xanax; it is non-habituating."  Really .......

 

And, "I like to prescribe medication.  Discontinuing is not my specialty. If you're having difficulties, let me prescribe an SSRI." 😳

[[...]]

Doctor. I think I am having withdrawal on the Ativan  Doctor said. Ok take it 3 times a day instead of one.            Ten days after stopping Ativan. Your symptoms are not withdrawal it only last 7 days. I know I was a hospitalist. You have anxiety.

[[Fl...]]

When asked about the "addiction" potential of clonazepam, my doctor replies "Yes, there can be, but I'm not worried about that with you".

[[be...]]

 

CW,

 

A good response to your doctor could have been..."Quit acting like Micheal Jackon's doctor."

 

TC

 

:laugh:

[[be...]]

When I complained to my previous pdoc that I am having real trouble sleeping, she said,

 

"Don't worry about it. Your sleep will get even worse."

 

Then I told her my hands were cold because I just washed them, she said,

 

"You must have OCD."

 

Once I told my previous pdoc that after my trip to hell from a Xanax C/T, I said I don't want another addictive drug. She said,

 

"OK. I'll just give you klonopin instead of xanax."

[[Ba...]]

When I found out that benzos should be tapered off the doctor who took me cold turkey off 30mg of valium said, " Well!!! It's not like you were on 60mg!!!".

[[be...]]

After asking my GP to take a look at the Ashton Manual:

 

"Yeah, I've checked it out and I think it's outdated. It's from the 90s."

 

My (ex) addictionologist upon hearing that I want to taper:

 

"Of course you can try to come off of the Klonopin, but why do you want to suffer? There's no need to suffer that much. You might as well take it for life."

 

The same addictionologist about the dangers of Klonopin:

 

Me: "I've heard that Klonopin can be dangerous and addictive."

 

Doc: "No, no, it's only dangerous when you exceed your prescribed dose. That's drug seeking behavior."

 

Me: "Hmm. Is it true that the therapeutic range is .5 mg to 10 mg?"

 

Doc: "Yes."

 

Me: "So if I take 1 mg per day instead of my prescribed .5 mg without your knowledge, that's dangerous, but if I take 8 mg a day by your order, that's not?"

 

Doc: "Exactly."

 

That's the best kicker on here, except for Michael Jackson........

[[mo...]]

Seen in the ER Friday afternoon due to suspected gall bladder attack, admitted for tests and told I might need surgery IMMEDIATELY. By midnight, I've been admitted, but nothing has been done, not even a blood test, and I'm feeling better. I ask, for the tenth time when they are going to do the tests. The nurse tells me "soon".

 

Saturday at noon, STILL NOTHING. I tell the nurse I am going home. She cautions me that I might "get into serious" trouble with my gall bladder issues and recommends I stay in the hospital. I again ask when I'm having tests; when the doctors are seeing me and when the surgery is supposed to happen, and am again told, "soon". I'm feeling great now, but thinking, well they're the professionals, they know best, right? So I stay.

 

Saturday at 5pm. I tell the nurse I'm done. I feel fine, I'm discharging myself and I'm going home. She actually THREATENS me that if I leave against medical recommendations and have to come back because I have symptoms again and need surgery that my insurance won't pay for it...I'm thinking, WHAT? That can't be right...and, since I'm feeling fine now, wouldn't they rather have me home taking care of myself than paying for a hospital room when NOTHING is being done?

 

Saturday 9pm and still NO tests, NO docs have visited me and NO surgery has been scheduled. I demand to see the Hospitalist on duty and the conversation goes like this:

Me: Why am I still here? I've had NO tests, seen NO doctors, NOTHING has been done. I feel fine now.

Hospitalist: You might have to have your gall bladder removed.

Me: How would you know? You haven't run any tests! And WHEN would this surgery be done?

Hospitalist: Well, we don't know exactly, but when they (whoever "they" are) come in on Monday (still 36 hours away!), they can add you to the surgery schedule.

Me: So WHY have I been here all weekend when nothing has been done? And if I am at such risk of needing surgery WHY has NOTHING been done?

Hospitalist: Long pause, then placatingly, Well, just think of it like a spa weekend — you get to lay in bed all day and relax and be taken care of.

Stunned to hear this I could think of nothing to say so I just got up, got dressed and went home!

 

[[mo...]]

Addiction versus Dependence...?!

 

When we moved to a rural area, I had a lot of difficulty finding a doctor willing to do the Ashton Substitution Crossover Taper protocol. I spent months looking before I was finally referred to a state run addiction center. I made an appointment, went in and had a very interesting experience (LONG questionnaire and an intake interview like a cross examination followed by a urine test). When I got in to see the addiction counselor she informed me that I had tested positive for benzodiazepines. I explained that was why I was there; I wanted to work with someone using the Ashton Protocols to get OFF the benzos. She agreed that was a great plan, told me she was familiar with the Ashton Protocols and would help me if I was willing to commit to getting off the benzos.

 

Thrilled and relieved, I practically screamed, "YES!" She then informed me I would have to "give up my supplier" to get treatment, so I pulled out my prescription bottle and showed it to her. She looked at me oddly then said, "You are receiving these by prescription for medical treatment?" I told her I was. She asked if I took them exactly as prescribed and I said I did. She leaned forward and said, "You never take more than you are supposed to? Do you get prescriptions filled at more than one pharmacy or from more than one doctor?" I told her I did not. Then she said, "Well, I'm so sorry, but I can't help you. You don't have an ADDICTION problem, you have a DEPENDENCE problem. We're not funded to help people unless they are abusing drugs and since you are taking them under your doctor's care you are neither a drug abuser nor an addict so we can't help you."

 

Luckily, I eventually found someone willing to work with me on the Ashton Protocol, but I found that distinction between "addiction" and "dependence" an eye opening experience!

[[...]]

 

 

Saturday 9pm and still NO tests, NO docs have visited me and NO surgery has been scheduled. I demand to see the Hospitalist on duty and the conversation goes like this:

Me: Why am I still here? I've had NO tests, seen NO doctors, NOTHING has been done. I feel fine now.

Hospitalist: You might have to have your gall bladder removed.

Me: How would you know? You haven't run any tests! And WHEN would this surgery be done?

Hospitalist: Well, we don't know exactly, but when they (whoever "they" are) come in on Monday (still 36 hours away!), they can add you to the surgery schedule.

Me: So WHY have I been here all weekend when nothing has been done? And if I am at such risk of needing surgery WHY has NOTHING been done?

Hospitalist: Long pause, then placatingly, Well, just think of it like a spa weekend — you get to lay in bed all day and relax and be taken care of.

Stunned to hear this I could think of nothing to say so I just got up, got dressed and went home!

 

That's not even slightly funny, Mosart.  Did you know that surgeons are given "monthly quotas" that they have to fill?!    It's all business.  Here, you might find this interesting ...

[[mo...]]

Wow abcd,

 

I did not know about the quotas on surgery! I also had not heard of Dr. Makary before, but I just spent a few minutes watching several of his video clips and I'm so impressed I plan to go back for more — I absolutely agree that transparency is critical to quality care in this country.

 

Thx for that info and link,

 

Mo