Day 7, do I go inpatient now?

[[ma...]]

I think if you're feeling unsafe or you might do something stupid, it's a good idea to go inpatient. I'm inpatient mainly because of that. if I don't feel well, I can go to the nurses and they'll help me, and I can sit with them until I feel a bit better and things like that.

 

Floraj, were you on 25mg lorazepam or did you crossover to a weaker benzo?

 

I was on 25mg lorazepam/night and more if needed. I didn't crossover to another Benzo; mainly because I'd gotten familiar with lorazepam withdrawal symptoms. (I did try something else for a couple of days, but the anxiolytic effect was too weak and the w/d symptoms were different, so I switched back to lorazepam.)

I guess for other people switching to a different benzo makes sense, but in my case it's best to taper off the lorazepam and hope for the best. I've been feeling pretty much okay (except for anxiety and restlessness, but since I'm in hospital, I have the nursing staff where I can go if I feel bad 24/7, and that helps a lot), so I'm very much happy with my progress and everything.

 

I think if you're feeling unsafe or you might do something stupid, it's a good idea to go inpatient. I'm inpatient mainly because of that. if I don't feel well, I can go to the nurses and they'll help me, and I can sit with them until I feel a bit better and things like that.

 

Have you been in the hospital this entire time?

 

yes, I've been in hospital since early November. I'm quite glad though, because it's helped me tremendously. if everything goes well, I can go home in six weeks =)

 

floraj, 25mg lorazepam is an extremely high dose, not possible to take without risking your life and certainly not during years. Are you talking about 2.5mg?

[[fl...]]

I think if you're feeling unsafe or you might do something stupid, it's a good idea to go inpatient. I'm inpatient mainly because of that. if I don't feel well, I can go to the nurses and they'll help me, and I can sit with them until I feel a bit better and things like that.

 

Floraj, were you on 25mg lorazepam or did you crossover to a weaker benzo?

 

I was on 25mg lorazepam/night and more if needed. I didn't crossover to another Benzo; mainly because I'd gotten familiar with lorazepam withdrawal symptoms. (I did try something else for a couple of days, but the anxiolytic effect was too weak and the w/d symptoms were different, so I switched back to lorazepam.)

I guess for other people switching to a different benzo makes sense, but in my case it's best to taper off the lorazepam and hope for the best. I've been feeling pretty much okay (except for anxiety and restlessness, but since I'm in hospital, I have the nursing staff where I can go if I feel bad 24/7, and that helps a lot), so I'm very much happy with my progress and everything.

 

I think if you're feeling unsafe or you might do something stupid, it's a good idea to go inpatient. I'm inpatient mainly because of that. if I don't feel well, I can go to the nurses and they'll help me, and I can sit with them until I feel a bit better and things like that.

 

Have you been in the hospital this entire time?

 

yes, I've been in hospital since early November. I'm quite glad though, because it's helped me tremendously. if everything goes well, I can go home in six weeks =)

 

floraj, 25mg lorazepam is an extremely high dose, not possible to take without risking your life and certainly not during years. Are you talking about 2.5mg?

 

no, I am talking about 25mg. I'm aware that I could've died in my sleep from respiratory depression, but I didn't really care. I just took more and more over the years because the dose I was on would always stop working after a while, so I just took more.

I'm down to 2.5mg now and really happy and proud of myself; I never thought I'd be able to do that.

[[ea...]]

Good heavens. 25 mgs of Ativan is almost unheard of. I don't know a single reputable doctors who would prescribe that much.

You SHOULD be proud, getting your dose down so much. I can only imagine the hell you went through getting there. Be proud of yourself. You have done something that truly IS wonderful.

east

[[Th...]]

What type of hospital are you in now? It’s a little confusing if you’ve been off a week insurance will not pay for you to go to rehab after you’ve been off that long.  Are you asking if you should go to a mental hospital. Could you just clarify but one thing for sure I’d ask a doctor to put me on an anti seizure med to be on the safe side.

[[fl...]]

Good heavens. 25 mgs of Ativan is almost unheard of. I don't know a single reputable doctors who would prescribe that much.

You SHOULD be proud, getting your dose down so much. I can only imagine the hell you went through getting there. Be proud of yourself. You have done something that truly IS wonderful.

east

 

thank you, your kind words are very much appreciated 

having a bit of a rough time right now, but still reducing nevertheless. it's going to be hard and crappy no matter what I do. I've had some good days, and that's helping a lot, knowing there *are* going to be better days.

and I agree, it's rather careless in my opinion to prescribe me that amount of lorazepam. I mean, I wanted it, but he could have said no a long time ago. I'm only getting off the stuff because I'm taking things into my own hands, not because my psychiatrist forced me to.

[[ea...]]

My friend, I was forced to go off benzos by my medical doctor. The psyhiatrist who had prescribed Klonapin and Ambien and ADs to me was leaving town. My Medical doc called him and, I guess, threatened him. He cut me off ALL my drugs. And I went cold turkey off of it all.

I think it is very honest and brave of you to admit you "wanted" your drugs. I did too. I had taken benzos for 30 years, mostly illegally (something that shames me now. I am a nurse and always had easy access to benzos.) I began seeing the psychiatrist when hospitals began counting benzos, accounting for where they had gone. Now. Try to understand this. I had NO idea tolerance withdrawal existed. ALL I knew was I felt terrribly anxious,  depressed, unable to sleep. Other weird symptoms. I had NO idea they were ll due to benzos. But they were. I sought help from specialists and from this psychiatrist. He put me on Klonapin, Ambien and a host of ADS which did NOTHING for me, except the benzos allowed me to sleep.

When I first went CT I was super angry at this doctor. Later on I realized that I had played a big part in this personal disaster. I KNOW when I saw this doctor, I played up my anxiety, in order to keep getting my prescriptions. NOT proud of that now. But it is the truth. And yes, the truth will set you free eventually.

It has been a long, difficult journey for me. But I have healed and so will you, my friend. Just do not give up.

east

[[ma...]]

Good heavens. 25 mgs of Ativan is almost unheard of. I don't know a single reputable doctors who would prescribe that much.

You SHOULD be proud, getting your dose down so much. I can only imagine the hell you went through getting there. Be proud of yourself. You have done something that truly IS wonderful.

east

 

floraj, how did you take the 25mg ativan? Ten 2.5mg pills? Several times a day, I imagine, no? It's so difficult to imagine, great that you are almost free by now!

 

thank you, your kind words are very much appreciated 

having a bit of a rough time right now, but still reducing nevertheless. it's going to be hard and crappy no matter what I do. I've had some good days, and that's helping a lot, knowing there *are* going to be better days.

and I agree, it's rather careless in my opinion to prescribe me that amount of lorazepam. I mean, I wanted it, but he could have said no a long time ago. I'm only getting off the stuff because I'm taking things into my own hands, not because my psychiatrist forced me to.

[[fl...]]

Good heavens. 25 mgs of Ativan is almost unheard of. I don't know a single reputable doctors who would prescribe that much.

You SHOULD be proud, getting your dose down so much. I can only imagine the hell you went through getting there. Be proud of yourself. You have done something that truly IS wonderful.

east

 

floraj, how did you take the 25mg ativan? Ten 2.5mg pills? Several times a day, I imagine, no? It's so difficult to imagine, great that you are almost free by now!

 

thank you, your kind words are very much appreciated 

having a bit of a rough time right now, but still reducing nevertheless. it's going to be hard and crappy no matter what I do. I've had some good days, and that's helping a lot, knowing there *are* going to be better days.

and I agree, it's rather careless in my opinion to prescribe me that amount of lorazepam. I mean, I wanted it, but he could have said no a long time ago. I'm only getting off the stuff because I'm taking things into my own hands, not because my psychiatrist forced me to.

 

yes, took 10 of the 2.5mg pills, but all at once in the evening. when I had a bad day I would chuck another 5-10 pills. if I still had some leftover.

they hardly had any effect anymore except keeping me from going into withdrawal. that's sort of why I decided that I needed to quit, because they weren't doing anything anyway.

[[or...]]

floraj:

 

yes, took 10 of the 2.5mg pills, but all at once in the evening. when I had a bad day I would chuck another 5-10 pills. if I still had some leftover.

 

Just wondering . . . who prescribed these drugs for you? And where/how did you get the script(s) filled? In my county (even in liberal Oregon) every pharmacy is connected with every other pharmacy electronically and they all (unfortunately) know our business . . . as well as our doc's prescriptions. I had trouble getting my 10 mg Ambien filled at a pharmacy that was not my usual one.

 

As I said, just wonderin . . . 

 

Katz

[[fl...]]

floraj:

 

yes, took 10 of the 2.5mg pills, but all at once in the evening. when I had a bad day I would chuck another 5-10 pills. if I still had some leftover.

 

Just wondering . . . who prescribed these drugs for you? And where/how did you get the script(s) filled? In my county (even in liberal Oregon) every pharmacy is connected with every other pharmacy electronically and they all (unfortunately) know our business . . . as well as our doc's prescriptions. I had trouble getting my 10 mg Ambien filled at a pharmacy that was not my usual one.

 

As I said, just wonderin . . . 

 

Katz

 

my psychiatrist prescribed me the meds. all of them. I'd just go and get new scripts every week and then go to the pharmacy. and they gave them to me no problem, even though I went to the same few pharmacies every time and they already knew me. I live in Austria, so maybe it's different here. never had any issues getting them at the pharmacy, but sometimes the holiday replacement wouldn't prescribe me that much, so I always had to get loads from my psych before he went on holiday. 

[[or...]]

my psychiatrist prescribed me the meds. all of them.

 

Wow, flora, that's awful. He ought to be drummed out of the profession. And poor you. I'm sorry as hell you have to go through this.

 

No psychiatrist/doc here would prescribe 25 mgs of Ativan . . . and if they did, no pharmacy would fill it.

 

My best,

 

 

Katz

[[Go...]]

FloraJ

What symptoms are you having now? Coming off that amount is insane. I can’t imagine coming off an amount that high. Ive been following this thread to check on your progress. It’s amazing that you decided to come off this dangerous drug!

[[fl...]]

FloraJ

What symptoms are you having now? Coming off that amount is insane. I can’t imagine coming off an amount that high. Ive been following this thread to check on your progress. It’s amazing that you decided to come off this dangerous drug!

 

I'm doing surprisingly okay. What bothers me most is the dissociative symptoms and high pulse because those scare me. I also break out in a sweat really easily. When I taper off another 0.5mg, I feel a bit dizzy and sick for a couple of days, and really bad sweats, but nothing I can't handle, and that goes away again.

I'm super lucky I don't have any issues with my liver or other organs. everyone's said I got lucky because I'm still young and I probably just managed to go off the Benzos in time. I've started Lyrica, and it's been a godsend, because I have very bad anxiety (which is why I started the lorazepam in the first place).

[[ea...]]

Floraj, why are you on Lyrica? IMO this is NOT a safe drug to take. Just my opinion.

Me, I would not take another AD or other brain affecting drug (as is Lyrica) unless I had a terminal disease.

 

We benzo people need to STOP assuming that if we feel bad, we should take a pill or two. That is the kind of thinking that goes us into such trouble with benzos. I am a nurse. I used to think this pill or that pill would help me. Most of them did not and some may have caused even more brain injury. This is just an opinion.

east

 

[[fl...]]

Floraj, why are you on Lyrica? IMO this is NOT a safe drug to take. Just my opinion.

Me, I would not take another AD or other brain affecting drug (as is Lyrica) unless I had a terminal disease.

 

We benzo people need to STOP assuming that if we feel bad, we should take a pill or two. That is the kind of thinking that goes us into such trouble with benzos. I am a nurse. I used to think this pill or that pill would help me. Most of them did not and some may have caused even more brain injury. This is just an opinion.

east

 

I'm glad you don't need any meds. I don't have that luxury. I have to take meds due to mental illness, and it doesn't have anything to do with benzos. if I don't take my meds and am not in treatment in general, the lifetime prevalence of death is 10%, so I'm quite happy to be on medication that helps me.

[[Go...]]

FloraJ-

It’s ok if you have tot ale meds for a mental illness. I know you stated before you have bod which medication is needed to help treat it. Also you have come along way with getting of the benzo and that is awesome. One day at a time and one thing at a time! You have come off such a high amount so you should be incredibly proud of yourself! Once your off completely it’s uo from there!

[[Sa...]]

Windwalker,

 

Nov 1 a new US law went into effect:  you cannot have opiates and a benzo prescription!  I was told Oct 28th to choose the benzo or the pain meds.  I chose to quit Xanax ... did not do any research - MISTAKE!!  I was told I would not have withdrawals by 3 docs since I had taken meds as prescribed for YEARS.  Liars.  Lived second to second for five weeks.  It is now week 11, withdrawals are still brutal.  I’m almost 60 and was not prepared.

 

I did go inpatient 5 weeks.  I was in such acute withdrawals .. worse than anything I had tried to read in a few hours here.  I could not take care of myself.  Inpatient was a life saver for me, I was lucky/blessed to have great docs.

 

I just found these posts from January.  Thanks to everyone that answered. 

 

 

 

[[ea...]]

SaraSue,

Thank you. I did know that law was passed as I no longer watch TV (thanks to BWD!) I do think its a good law but I also think the government needs to do a lot more about benzos. Opiates are old news. Most people know they are addictive. Its benzos that are the problem and I often wonder if the Drug Companies are supressing the truth. What do you guys think?

east

[[Fi...]]

Windwalker,

 

Nov 1 a new US law went into effect:  you cannot have opiates and a benzo prescription!  I was told Oct 28th to choose the benzo or the pain meds.  I chose to quit Xanax ... did not do any research - MISTAKE!!  I was told I would not have withdrawals by 3 docs since I had taken meds as prescribed for YEARS.  Liars.  Lived second to second for five weeks.  It is now week 11, withdrawals are still brutal.  I’m almost 60 and was not prepared.

 

I did go inpatient 5 weeks.  I was in such acute withdrawals .. worse than anything I had tried to read in a few hours here.  I could not take care of myself.  Inpatient was a life saver for me, I was lucky/blessed to have great docs.

 

I just found these posts from January.  Thanks to everyone that answered.

 

I am not aware of such a U.S. law, will you please provide a reference?

 

I am aware of the CDC's Guidelines for Prescribing Opioids for Chronic Pain:

 

https://www.cdc.gov/drugoverdose/prescribing/guideline.html

 

 

[[de...]]

Just because you stop supply does not mean you are going to prevent demand. 

 

Services and support need to be set in place to support those people forced (now) into 'choosing' one drug or another.  Benzo or opiate. 

 

The devil and the deep blue sea. 

 

Dee

[[Sa...]]

Fi,

 

I checked, my docs were not honest (imagine that?)!  No US law, state law and it was not no benzos and opiates prescribing - it was reporting the prescribing to officials (I assume docs did not want to do that).  Accountability? 

 

My trust in docs GONE.  I hate being lied to.

 

However, I’m totally drug free.  As the pain increases I wonder how long I can last??