Knackered Hurts and is Stuck at Home with Benzos

   Hey there.  Knackered here.  During my college years, shortly after the ice crust melted, I lived on an interesting block with a unique house nearby.  The place was known as the ‘Serendipity House’ and hosted a very interesting group of people.  The windows were covered with American flags and tie dyed sheets.  The outside was painted with a kaleidoscope of rainbow colors from partially used cans that were found in the shed out back.  Their theme song was “Flowers on the Wall” (Statler Bros. circa 1966).  It blared from huge speakers and open windows.  If you remember, the song had to do with doing nothing and the guys living there were experts at it.  Surprisingly,  they all graduated on time.  Seems as though they knew how to use that ‘nothing time’ productively.

   Most of us on the Benzo program are faced with a similar situation:  lots of empty time, too much on our minds, and unable to get very far.  What does a person do when their mind is numb from stagnation?

   One of the first things you might try if you’re stuck by yourself in an out of place bedroom or study is move yourself to the center of activity.  That could mean relocating to a downstairs bedroom or even the living room if you can be comfortable there.  If you live by yourself, it probably doesn’t matter, as long as you don’t feel isolated and cut off from life.

   Try to keep yourself busy by doing things while laying down or sitting on a couch or a chair that’s comfortable.  Reading, laptop, crafts, writing, TV are all things that fit the bill if they suit your fancy and play nice with your ‘head space’.

   Bringing the ‘outside inside’ works for some folks.  Since you probably don’t feel like getting down on all fours to garden outside, set up a herb garden or Bonsai forest indoors.  (Bonsai is a real art that takes patience, time and skill. I killed mine in a month or so.)

   Maintaining friendships with folks in your similar situation always helps.  BB is the place to start with for us, but you might want to venture out from there on social media.  Be sure that you’re in a positive and safe situation.  On line contacts can be notoriously ‘dodgy’.

   If you live alone or are responsible for stuff like groceries, household finances, and getting yourself to the Dr., beware of driving around town in the condition many of us find ourselves in.  Almost anything can be done on your laptop and is much better than operating a vehicle in a confused and painful body.

   Taking on a new pet at this stage may be too much, but if you already have one, cherish it.  Lots of homebound folks use them for a ‘bed buddy’ when they arrive at this interesting stage in life.

   As miserable as we are and as hopeless as things may seem, it’s wise to remember that, “We have succeeded  in life when all we really want is only what we really need.” (Vernon Howard: 1918-1992)