Sick of Docs/PT for Injury When They All Just Think I'm Nuts

[[An...]]

I don't get it. I would think this was a big deal even if I WASN'T in benzo w/d. I am dead sick of being in this level of pain and having to not do anything--and I mean almost anything--and having these people think it's not a big deal. My w/d symptoms are there, yes, and there's nothing to do about it. But just because I'm emotional about it (I would be anyway!) and that now involves me shaking, sweating, and seeming physically uncomfortable (which I am). And it always brings on some suggestion of doing something in the mental health arena. As if losing your sex life and your exercise life are just a-ok things to lose and wouldn't bring anyone down a few notches.

 

Anyway, I was doing fine before going to PT, and now I'm a nervous wreck because this got brought up. And all I REALLY want is to talk about it and have someone listen, and that's the last thing anyone is doing. If they don't want to know how I feel, they should just stop asking. I'm better off just healing on my own and figuring this out myself, because I wasn't a nervous wreck for once this week earlier today and these people don't actually help a single thing.

 

Sorry, just had to post this because it is frustrating and this is the only place I know where I can actually talk about it without someone trying to check me into a psych ward.

[[he...]]

Pour your heart ...your in a  safe place to do it here...... Sorry your in the thick of it!!! Sending you warm thoughts ,  Jude

[[An...]]

Thanks Jude 

 

It's all I needed to do. I have a little symptom diary book, and I pour it out there, and if I can occasionally do it here as well, that's all that matters to me.

 

Geez, she was upset that I had made "derogatory statements about" myself and told me that she's had to contact the mental services to monitor some of her patients! Of COURSE I feel bad about myself! It doesn't mean I have some horrible problem! Most of the horrible problem is what I'm seeing her for! And if she has had to call services about her OTHER patients being upset over getting injured or disabled (I don't know what shape her other patients are in) then maybe they're not getting adequate support either...I can only assume they're not all in benzo w/d.

 

So anyway, I was upset in the first place, and now just freaked out. From now on I'll be happy and cheerful about not being able to move my own pelvis. It's GREAT, lady! You should try it! See, I'm SOOO HAPPY!!!

[[De...]]

I have definitely learned not to express every thought

and feeling I have to doctors right now. I would be locked up for sure

This is a very frustrating time But it will get better

Good Luck

[[An...]]

Well, a lot of it is me trying to get answers and direction out of them, and not to do with sex. My abs are strained, and so is my psoas muscle. That makes you bend a bit at the middle, and the back does all the work. They don't want me sitting on one side, but straight up and down. OK, try sitting even (injured hip/hip flexor) on a sofa even without strained abs. Makes your back sore. Can't stand up, no support in the front, so same thing, and walking is dicey and you can't spend 24 hours a day doing that, either. Laying on my back is fine except that I've done it for 2 months and now am sore, + can't read in that position. Neck is now sore from trying to keep my head upright while the rest of my body sags, and with enough pestering I might have talked them into a brace of some kind.

 

Yet they won't give me any answers and wonder why it makes me edgy. And that's just standing, sitting and trying to sleep. I just want to be comfortable and not re-injure myself, because every re-strain adds another 6 weeks to my recovery but no one tells me ANYTHING.

 

OK, I'll try to stop ranting now.

[[mr...]]

As Jude said, cry it out.

We are here to listen.

It is very important for people to take control of their health and to make informed decisions before ever taking a drug.

There are always risks that we sign off on for medical proceedures and we have to weigh them before making a choice.

 

There are many people here that have suffered thru so many things and these people can sometimes help us get thru our worst symptoms.

Sometimes, just talking it out helps us come up with ideas, too.

Also, remember that benzo w/d puts our symptoms thru the roof and we have to realize that the pain we have would much more tolerable had we not been in w/d.

 

 

[[me...]]

Hi, I'm sorry you're going through this now.

 

The sad but simple fact is that most main-stream doctors and other medical people are trained to react to "emotional" patients this way.  Also, it's important to remember that a physical therapist is trained to treat physical body mechanics only, and emotions and feelings are not their venue.  To them, the body is mainly a "machine." 

 

Have you looked into consulting with a pain specialist?  I know there are doctors who specialize in that field....

 

Megan

[[An...]]

Thanks, guys.

 

Megan, well, people keep suggesting a pain specialist, but I don't know what they can do. They use meds, mainly. Also, if the muscle strains would heal, it will be OK in the end. That's the frustrating part, advice on what to do in the meantime. I have re-injured, to the point of landing in the hospital, 5 times since then. Thing is, there's no easy way to heal a psoas. Plus, the major issue aside from the strains is what caused most of this initially, and that's w/d and no one can treat it. My muscles spasm now if used for anything instead of relaxing, complete opposite of how they should be. Didn't realize that early on, well, I was d/r and d/p and all, so I strained several of them just trying to be active. They're still doing it, though. My last psoas re-injure, last Sunday, was a massive spasm when I was sitting on the sofa. Still not where I was before that. But who on earth addresses that sort of issue?

 

And she got upset and freaked instead because I was depressed that I can't have sex. And had made derogatory comments about myself because I wasn't over the moon about being in a gown with no undies on while she put sensors all over my privates. Seriously, if anyone here hates sex and LOVES weird crap like that instead, I know a PT who desperately needs patients who never get upset.

[[An...]]

Sorry, almost freaked out again just writing that. It's best to not be too emotional in general.

 

How to keep the muscles from spasming? That's the real trick.

[[mr...]]

Sorry, almost freaked out again just writing that. It's best to not be too emotional in general.

 

How to keep the muscles from spasming? That's the real trick.

Magnesium.

Have u tried soaking in a bath with a few cups of epsom salts?

 

[[An...]]

Sorry, almost freaked out again just writing that. It's best to not be too emotional in general.

 

How to keep the muscles from spasming? That's the real trick.

Magnesium.

Have u tried soaking in a bath with a few cups of epsom salts?

 

I've been taking of magnesium for 3 months. Not working. Baths don't help for very long either, but they told me to not get the inflamed muscles overheated also. That's about all they told me.

[[mr...]]

I've been taking of magnesium for 3 months. Not working. Baths don't help for very long either, but they told me to not get the inflamed muscles overheated also. That's about all they told me.

Didn't u say you were taking calcium with mag?

[[An...]]

Very occasionally, mrtmeo. It seems to irritate my stomach. The spasms are partly just normal benzo w/d spasms, and all the muscles are spastic, but the bad ones in my back and shoulders are from not being able to sit or stand up straight. They're pretty typical injury spasms. Happened first month of this until my body adapted, and now again that it's been shifted back to the proper healing position. Just not very comfortable!!!!!

 

Went for a massage tonight, though. Very nice

[[mr...]]

Having any underlying issue along with w/d makes this whole process so difficult to get thru.

It just makes me sad to see people get surgeries because of w/d symptoms, only to have the symptom remain after the surgery.

 

When my mom first withdrew, she was able to get a muscle relaxer from pdoc to help with relaxing.

The doc prescribed tizanidine and she only used it when she felt really bad.

Not sure if a muscle relaxer would help u or not.

 

 

[[An...]]

OMG....I'm breaking down again. I literally cannot find any position to get comfortable in. If I straighten my back to support my body it locks down below, if I unlock that my back, shoulders and neck spasm until I feel nauseated. This is really just terribly uncomfortable.

 

I have skelaxin and flexeril, but both make me go to really bad mental places. I don't even like that when I'm not in w/d. I have pain meds, tons of stuff and I can't take any of it. Maybe I should get an appt. with someone else tomorrow? Anyone know anything about applied kinesiology? Someone recommended it. At least people trained in that can tell me how to sit, stand, etc. that might be easier until this heals. I still have (unless I reinjure) another 2 months to heal, since my last re-injury was Sunday (from a spasm while sitting on the sofa....). This is humiliating. So humiliating.

[[mr...]]

Hi Anton,

I am sorry u r in so much pain.

Looking at your sig, it looks like u tapered pretty fast.

I have noticed that while in tolerance or withdrawal, bad experiences become memories that can cause the same symptoms, but far worse, during acute w/d. This has happened with my mom and things are very gradually improving.

I just wish there was something to give u some relief.

 

Have you considered acupuncture?

 

[[An...]]

Thanks, mrtmeo. I'm glad someone's looking out for me. I've tried acupuncture, it hurt so bad I thought I was going to die, and don't normally have that reaction. I tried everything already, really. I went into a kinesiology expert today, and I get the same answers all the time. Right side of my pelvis gave out, so the muscles shut off. The corresponding muscles are trying as hard as possible, but after 3 months they're just not taking it well. Basically one side of my pelvis is pulling one way, the other side the other, and the psoas is not getting a break so it's inflamed. If I could sleep or lay down in any comfortable way, this would be a lot easier, really.

[[mr...]]

Thanks, mrtmeo. I'm glad someone's looking out for me. I've tried acupuncture, it hurt so bad I thought I was going to die, and don't normally have that reaction. I tried everything already, really. I went into a kinesiology expert today, and I get the same answers all the time. Right side of my pelvis gave out, so the muscles shut off. The corresponding muscles are trying as hard as possible, but after 3 months they're just not taking it well. Basically one side of my pelvis is pulling one way, the other side the other, and the psoas is not getting a break so it's inflamed. If I could sleep or lay down in any comfortable way, this would be a lot easier, really.

I wonder if you have atlas out of orthogonal?

part 1

 

part 2

 

[[An...]]

See, thing is, that's what I'm suspecting is the problem in the first place. An overly enthusiastic chiropractor trying to even me out (before w/d started but while I was weakened from the klonopin) in the months before I tapered. Only time I finally felt right again is when everything finally shifted back to the left side. Been that way since childhood, don't think my muscles, tendons and joints could take that along with the muscle damage from w/d. I'm finally feeling better tonight (for now) and all I did differently was lay on my left side so my right could go back to where it has been forever.

 

I'm not going to go full out and blame this guy, but does anyone know about chiropractic and possible damage? I've got 2 PTs saying that's probably where the problem started. Just wasn't saying much, and just a theory.

[[mr...]]

See, thing is, that's what I'm suspecting is the problem in the first place. An overly enthusiastic chiropractor trying to even me out (before w/d started but while I was weakened from the klonopin) in the months before I tapered. Only time I finally felt right again is when everything finally shifted back to the left side. Been that way since childhood, don't think my muscles, tendons and joints could take that along with the muscle damage from w/d. I'm finally feeling better tonight (for now) and all I did differently was lay on my left side so my right could go back to where it has been forever.

 

I'm not going to go full out and blame this guy, but does anyone know about chiropractic and possible damage? I've got 2 PTs saying that's probably where the problem started. Just wasn't saying much, and just a theory.

 

I'm so glad u r feeling relief. HOPE it LASTS!

 

My mom had a chiro that purposely adjusted her hip on the wrong side because I questioned her why she was adjusting that side.

She wouldn't tell me and kept changing the topic.

The next day, my mom's back was killing her, so she had to go back in.

With the atlas orthogonal, the atlas is the only free floating bone that determines everything downline.

If the atlas is out, it will shift the hips, spine and where ever it needs to in order to get our head centered between our feet when we stand and our eyes level.

 

If u have a twisted hip and a chiro adjusts it back, the hip will twist again.

It will do this the same day and keep doing it until the real problem, the atlas has been adjusted correctly.

The only ones that can adjust the atlas correctly are those who have the specialized machine and xray equipment designed for accurately adjusting the atlas.

http://atlasorthogonality.com/

 

[[An...]]

Thanks, in and out in terms of what is working. Honestly, I cannot keep chasing cures and the like. I said that before, tried to get my mind off of it and got so much worse (physically) that I then was kicking myself, but I am so far revved up from the constant obsessive hunt for treatment for the physical issues. Driving me batty. I'm about done. Well, not done, I have appts. with a PT, a kinesiologist, and an OB/GYN this next week, so I guess I'm not done, but I've got to stop worrying and trying to "solve the mystery".

 

Now, I'm going to eat those words when I'm back next week (or tomorrow) panicking about this or that....lol. :idiot:

[[...]]

Antonius,

 

I'm sorry for being realistic as my realism sounds a bit discouraging but after this horrible experience with my doctor I only see them as businessmen taking care of their business. Their business is not your health or well being but you coming back. And they do that very successfully most of the time. Few days ago I had a discussion with one of my colleagues about the progress of the medical science and how it increased our life expectancy. I had a good laugh that day. Funny guys the doctors...

 

Miti

[[ma...]]

Your story sounds very much like mine. I was also on klonopin for many years and at this point I can barely walk. I have neuromuscular pain off the scales. I used to ride 250 miles a week, do yoga, and hike. Now I am crippled and have inflamed joints, tendons, back, etc. etc.

 

I've been searching for answers and going to PT for 2 years (1 yr taper, 1 yr post) and it's been a bust in terms of results. I do acupuncture, massage, chiro, friggin everything. None of it really touches this pain.

 

I don't know what to say. I've made massive progress on my cognition and derealization/seizures, etc. But my body is like that of a 90 year old.

 

M

[[An...]]

maintain, did your body twist? I'm just wondering where I can find similar symptoms. My pelvis keeps dropping on one side, and it's the side that used to be higher up. The rest of my body just can't keep up with that. But there's this constant feeling like I'm pregnant, like there is something IN my belly. It just won't bend or flex like normal, and it's because it feels like something is actually in there. Weird feeling.

 

Maintain, is there any answer at all for you? I cannot live like this, but at this point it's the not knowing side of it. My pelvis shifts so much around (well, always the same way) that I can't feel anything in it anymore. Hardly even pain most of the time now. It's very disconcerting to lose control of your pelvis, not to sound weird or anything, but criminy.

 

I went through a bad c/t 3 years ago, and as bad as that was, none of THIS happened to me. I didn't injure myself, true, but still, I wasn't disabled like this unable to move a major part of my body.

[[An...]]

Holy crap, I have a really bad infection it turns out. Huh. Taking antibiotics, we'll see how this turns out.