Valium/Diazepam Support Group

[[Fa...]]

  Dear All ,

                Reading other people's experience s the general problem seems to be going too fast.However,my Physchiatrist+ G.P are going by Ashton pretty much to the letter,and having a quick look at her example for Lorezapam_ Diazepam(unless I've read it wrong!) ,she is O.K. with 5mg cuts of Diazapam every fortnight till I get to 30mg.I really feel this is going to be too fast for me ,butI think the Physchiatrist is following the Ashton plan rather than listen to how I'm coping.However ,will resolve to try and put my foot down a bit more at next app!.

    Kittensick,thanks for letting me know you felt better at 20mg .It does give me hope.I thought I'd feel worse the lower I got not better.And I'm do sorry you feel so awful ,but I totally get it.A year ago I wouldn't have done,and I never in a million years thought I'd end up in this situation.But like I've said before it makes all the difference in the world talking to others that understand.

  Must go now, have taken my nightly 40mg valium ,and everything s gone fuzzy!

[[Mo...]]

  Dear All ,

                Reading other people's experience s the general problem seems to be going too fast.However,my Physchiatrist+ G.P are going by Ashton pretty much to the letter,and having a quick look at her example for Lorezapam_ Diazepam(unless I've read it wrong!) ,she is O.K. with 5mg cuts of Diazapam every fortnight till I get to 30mg.I really feel this is going to be too fast for me ,butI think the Physchiatrist is following the Ashton plan rather than listen to how I'm coping.However ,will resolve to try and put my foot down a bit more at next app!.

    Kittensick,thanks for letting me know you felt better at 20mg .It does give me hope.I thought I'd feel worse the lower I got not better.And I'm do sorry you feel so awful ,but I totally get it.A year ago I wouldn't have done,and I never in a million years thought I'd end up in this situation.But like I've said before it makes all the difference in the world talking to others that understand.

  Must go now, have taken my nightly 40mg valium ,and everything s gone fuzzy!

 

I'm sorry, I'm a a it fuzzy and have not read all..

But if your doc is following the Ashton manual to a T: there is also a piece in there where she stews clearly that the speed of the taper has to be by the patients pace.

 

[[bu...]]

builder,

thanks. I know they are very different. Klonopin made me disabled and Valium

complete vegetable 

Smaller cuts means it would take longer on Klonopin and probably

worse WD symptoms since it doesn't have long half life like Valium right?

 

Smaller cuts do NOT mean it would take longer, because K dosages are also much smaller.  You were at 30 mg V, but that would be approx the same as 1.5mg K.

 

V is suggested as the best benzo to taper because of its long half-life.  But K also has a fairly long half-life.

[[cr...]]

Fairport123......I am at the beginning of all of this, but so many people have told me that Ashton is just too fast for so many that I have to chime in.  Put that foot down.......WAY DOWN.........when talking to the doc.  So many of us just have to go slow, so insist on it, it is not unusual at all.  Cross

[[be...]]

Hey Moo:

 

I could tell that your were fuzzy when you made a reply to Fairport about Ashton's schedule. "She stews clearly that the speed..."

 

kittensick: No I don't live in Poland, I just said my family came from there. I live in the US. And no, Poland did not invent benzos. It was this wonder guy named Dr Leo Sternback who spent a lifetime at Roche first inventing librium, then Valium and then klonopin. He might have invented more. May God not rest his soul. I guess you are in bed now, but I agree that since you are not yet stable on your Valium, making a change in your Seroquel might not be a good idea now. It's just that you are complaining that you sleep too much. I know you feel like a mess right now, but it will get better. Just try and hang tight. I can't tell you anything about that Valium you are taking because I don't know what they put in it but it seems to have a strong effect on you. Take care and I hope you wake up feeling better tomorrow.

 

Fairport: Try 70 mg of V for me!!!! Actually, I am also still on K so I haven't begun my V taper yet but I am doing a dry micro taper off my K. I was dropping by .001 grams every day until I started feeling symptoms at .29 mg so my pdoc told me to drop 10 out of 14 days, basically to get rid of my bad fatigue, which kept me in bed a lot. Now that has gone away and I wish I could resume my every day drop as I am sick, sick, sick to death of this K taper and just want to get it over with. When I begin my taper off my V, I plan to use liquid and pills and have every intention of dropping every day.

[[Mo...]]

Hey Moo:

 

I could tell that your were fuzzy when you made a reply to Fairport about Ashton's schedule. "She stews clearly that the speed..."

 

kittensick: No I don't live in Poland, I just said my family came from there. I live in the US. And no, Poland did not invent benzos. It was this wonder guy named Dr Leo Sternback who spent a lifetime at Roche first inventing librium, then Valium and then klonopin. He might have invented more. May God not rest his soul. I guess you are in bed now, but I agree that since you are not yet stable on your Valium, making a change in your Seroquel might not be a good idea now. It's just that you are complaining that you sleep too much. I know you feel like a mess right now, but it will get better. Just try and hang tight. I can't tell you anything about that Valium you are taking because I don't know what they put in it but it seems to have a strong effect on you. Take care and I hope you wake up feeling better tomorrow.

 

Fairport: Try 70 mg of V for me!!!! Actually, I am also still on K so I haven't begun my V taper yet but I am doing a dry micro taper off my K. I was dropping by .001 grams every day until I started feeling symptoms at .29 mg so my pdoc told me to drop 10 out of 14 days, basically to get rid of my bad fatigue, which kept me in bed a lot. Now that has gone away and I wish I could resume my every day drop as I am sick, sick, sick to death of this K taper and just want to get it over with. When I begin my taper off my V, I plan to use liquid and pills and have every intention of dropping every day.

 

I just saw that.

But since we are all on benzos, it only makes sense that I meant " states" and nobody is stewing...

[[Te...]]

Hey Moo:

 

I could tell that your were fuzzy when you made a reply to Fairport about Ashton's schedule. "She stews clearly that the speed..."

 

kittensick: No I don't live in Poland, I just said my family came from there. I live in the US. And no, Poland did not invent benzos. It was this wonder guy named Dr Leo Sternback who spent a lifetime at Roche first inventing librium, then Valium and then klonopin. He might have invented more. May God not rest his soul. I guess you are in bed now, but I agree that since you are not yet stable on your Valium, making a change in your Seroquel might not be a good idea now. It's just that you are complaining that you sleep too much. I know you feel like a mess right now, but it will get better. Just try and hang tight. I can't tell you anything about that Valium you are taking because I don't know what they put in it but it seems to have a strong effect on you. Take care and I hope you wake up feeling better tomorrow.

 

Fairport: Try 70 mg of V for me!!!! Actually, I am also still on K so I haven't begun my V taper yet but I am doing a dry micro taper off my K. I was dropping by .001 grams every day until I started feeling symptoms at .29 mg so my pdoc told me to drop 10 out of 14 days, basically to get rid of my bad fatigue, which kept me in bed a lot. Now that has gone away and I wish I could resume my every day drop as I am sick, sick, sick to death of this K taper and just want to get it over with. When I begin my taper off my V, I plan to use liquid and pills and have every intention of dropping every day.

 

 

Bets,

Today I started the liquid vodka method,  I got a schedule that I will cut 1 mg in 55 days, which is great.

hope you can finish the K soon and be only in valium,  Thanks for the support, when I read your post I see that you don't whine too much.  you are a brave one.  Giving support to all, but nobody know how are you doing?  maybe suffering more than Us.

I really think you have a great heart and deserve to be free of all kind of medications. 

 

Lucky of your divorce was an easy one.  my was the cause of all this crap.  but I getting back to my feet.

I will survive and be happy again, there is hope for all of Us!!!

 

Hugs

 

Be safe

 

Tex

 

:smitten: :smitten:

 

 

 

[[dp...]]

Been in a window all night tonight.

 

Feel probably the most normal now that I have felt in a long time. It's definitely seeming to be more of a physical withdrawal for me towards the end here.

 

Hope y'all are well.

[[jj...]]

Been in a window all night tonight.

 

Feel probably the most normal now that I have felt in a long time. It's definitely seeming to be more of a physical withdrawal for me towards the end here.

 

Hope y'all are well.

Great news, dpier! Take it slow and you are going to be just fine!

[[Mo...]]

Been in a window all night tonight.

 

Feel probably the most normal now that I have felt in a long time. It's definitely seeming to be more of a physical withdrawal for me towards the end here.

 

Hope y'all are well.

 

That makes me all sorts of happy !!

 

[[Ki...]]

I am just soo sick that I cannot take it anymore :'( I thought Klonopin was bad but this is way way

worse :'( I am just throwing up,disoriented,dizzy,suicidal. Sooo sick :'(

[[Mi...]]

It's 3:45 am. Awake for hours. Feeling panicky. Need to reach out to you. Docotr has me on B12 - methyl. It helps lift depression which has had me suicidal but it revs up symptoms - swinging from near panic to disorientation.

 

I'm so scared. Lonely, can't stand this. don't want to wake husband in other room. He will pat my hand and go back to sleep. I will stll be alone and frightened. I just have to tell someone or else I will go mad. Maybe I am going insane. Please help.

 

MirandaJane

 

 

[[Ki...]]

Bets,

I know you are not from Poland but The guy who invented these pills was. Well if he invented the

same pills but if they would continue to work same and had no WD symptoms I think they would be

good pills. Maybe someone else will come with better idea for anxiety in future

Interesting that brand Roche works for me both Valium and Klonopin.Do they make like better pills? ???Anyway I am not doing well at all so I will really have to go back to Klonopin or take both like you.

Not sure how to do it yet. I guess like Ashton just going the opposite way?

I really wish I can tolerate the Diazepam but I can't

 

[[fr...]]

  Miranda,  Just wanted to reach out and hold your hand, I know how terrifying and depressing this whole thing is.  Try to deep breathe or listen to some music, whatever can help calm you.  Have you just made a cut that is bringing on this wave?  I also just made a cut and felt it starting Sunday.  Yesterday was the worst, depression, anxiety, crying, tinnitus terrible, tongue burning etc. etc. all ramped up.  I got very upset but this morning it seems to have settled some.  I hope you can find a way to calm down and just hold on to the thought that its the pills, not you, and you will feel better.  Hugs and hope it passes soon.  I'm going for MRI today and I'm going to be a mess but I refused extra meds etc.  I really am claustro but I will just have to push through and do it.  Pray for me and I will pray for you. 

[[be...]]

Hey Moo:

 

I could tell that your were fuzzy when you made a reply to Fairport about Ashton's schedule. "She stews clearly that the speed..."

 

kittensick: No I don't live in Poland, I just said my family came from there. I live in the US. And no, Poland did not invent benzos. It was this wonder guy named Dr Leo Sternback who spent a lifetime at Roche first inventing librium, then Valium and then klonopin. He might have invented more. May God not rest his soul. I guess you are in bed now, but I agree that since you are not yet stable on your Valium, making a change in your Seroquel might not be a good idea now. It's just that you are complaining that you sleep too much. I know you feel like a mess right now, but it will get better. Just try and hang tight. I can't tell you anything about that Valium you are taking because I don't know what they put in it but it seems to have a strong effect on you. Take care and I hope you wake up feeling better tomorrow.

 

Fairport: Try 70 mg of V for me!!!! Actually, I am also still on K so I haven't begun my V taper yet but I am doing a dry micro taper off my K. I was dropping by .001 grams every day until I started feeling symptoms at .29 mg so my pdoc told me to drop 10 out of 14 days, basically to get rid of my bad fatigue, which kept me in bed a lot. Now that has gone away and I wish I could resume my every day drop as I am sick, sick, sick to death of this K taper and just want to get it over with. When I begin my taper off my V, I plan to use liquid and pills and have every intention of dropping every day.

 

I just saw that.

But since we are all on benzos, it only makes sense that I meant " states" and nobody is stewing...

 

Hey, I was just joking. I thought you meant, "says."

[[Ki...]]

Ok so I go to hospital tomorrow for more pills because I just talked to the doctor and I have

Colon colitis and will have to take more meds :'(

I am complete mess and now more drugs

[[Fa...]]

  Bets,

          O.K 70mg Valium u beat me hands down!!

        Your taper sounds really complicated,and I don't really understand about micro tapering.But the first step for me is to convince the Physchiatrist 5mg a fortnight till I get to 30 is too much.So foot going down at next appointment at end of August!.But when you're on high doseages doesn't it seem endless?!

You desperately want to detox ,to get it over with ,but can't ,And all you can think is 40mg valium means a lot of months of misery!

However,you sound a strong cookie,and we'll all get there.Eventually!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Ok so I go to hospital tomorrow for more pills because I just talked to the doctor and I have

Colon colitis and will have to take more meds :'(

I am complete mess and now more drugs

 

Geez Kitten: I have been praying for you very night and it doesn't seem to help. I guess there is a chance that you just can't tolerate Valium. Especially your brand. Maybe the drug that they will give you will help you rather than harm you. I guess you really don't have a choice. To me, throwing up is the worst, the worst, the worst! Then you end up with heartburn and can't eat properly. You only weigh 90 measly pounds. You don't want to lose anymore. You are correct. Mea Culpa. Sternbach did come from Poland, but I thought it was Croatia but when he was born, parts of Croatia belonged to Poland. Anyway, he did his mischief while at Hoffman la Roche. He should have know right there and then that Valium was bad because he took the first dose himself and said if made him feel high. Then the wifey refused to allow him to take anymore. Hint hint? She should have been awarded, not him. Now I am embarrassed to say that I am Polish. I hope the Valium works out for you. Truly. If not, I guess you can do a reverse C/O. Thinking of you, honey.

 

Hey my Tex: I think that is so great that you can drop 1 mg in 55 days. You are getting there. Your choice of titration seems to be working, yet it's a bit early. I'm sure you'll do just fine on it. Me, I can't take any alcohol of any sort, even just a few drops mixed with a lot of water. Former drunk, ya know? Been 19 years, tho. That reminds me how old I am getting. I guess people like us are given benzos for numerous reasons.  I was reading an article that said benzo scripts are higher than ever, but the main problem they said was that psychs are handing out less than ever, but GPs and internists were picking up the slack. I think it said that 63% of all benzo scripts were written by non psychs. Just keep doing what you are doing! And don't be a stranger to this site. I miss ya!

 

MJ:

 

Had I known you were up that early, I would have logged into BB, cause I was up then too. There we could have had an exclusive pity party. I was busy returning emails. I'm sorry you got up so early. I know when I cannot sleep it drives me to the point of insanity. I'm sorry you felt so alone. I also do when I wake up when everybody else is asleep, but I don't want to bother them. I just put on some of my favorite music, to drown out the ultra quietness. I had the B12 shots before, and they really revved up my anxiety. Never again! I'd rather be deficient. Next time I wake up early, I log onto BB and see if you are up too. I am sending you virtual  :hug: I'm here for you!

Bets

[[be...]]

  Bets,

          O.K 70mg Valium u beat me hands down!!

        Your taper sounds really complicated,and I don't really understand about micro tapering.But the first step for me is to convince the Physchiatrist 5mg a fortnight till I get to 30 is too much.So foot going down at next appointment at end of August!.But when you're on high doseages doesn't it seem endless?!

You desperately want to detox ,to get it over with ,but can't ,And all you can think is 40mg valium means a lot of months of misery!

However,you sound a strong cookie,and we'll all get there.Eventually!!!!

 

Hey Fairport: Yes. I have this unpleasant distinction. Tho I read a long while ago that someone here was on 120 mg. And if I did a total C/O, I would end up being on 200 mg! Yes, the micro taper was hard for me to learn at first, even tho everybody gave me instructions that a 5th grader could figure out. But once I got the hang of it, it has been easy as pie. The only bad thing is you have to cut a different dose every day. So when this time happens, I cut a 30-day supply. It is really so tedious. I've been to two detoxes and they were two too many. I don't want to make the mistake of cutting too fast. I should have done the micro taper long ago. 70 mg mean a year+ of misery for me. But I am happy that I once was on 10 mg of K, and now I am down to a little less than .28 mg. That means something to me. I'm sure you will do just fine. If one can get off that hell in a bottle, K, (I need to reference this to someone else, but I forgot who it was), one should hopefully be able to tackle the Valium problems. Yes, by all means, put your foot down. Remember, you are in control of you own taper and not him. No doctor has a clue about this  because they haven't gone through it, so they should listen to you. I hope this happens and he doesn't fire you. He wants your money too much. So we'll be pals here for a long time, when most everybody is gone. Tho I suspect builder might still be around, because his main goal is helping others.  At least at that point we should know what we are talking about. :smitten:

[[Ki...]]

Bets,

thank you. I am soo down and messed up :'( The Diazepam is hellish so I am going back to

Roche Klonopin I am not happy about it because it doesn't work as it used to. When they

gave it to me first time it was great. It didnt make me high,just normal and able to eat and sleep

and function. But now its not that great. I guess it still works somehow but I am lazy and depressed on it. I guess that's normal on benzos

Now I have diarrhea on top of everything and I got message that my son wants to talk to me

but I am just mental mess :'(

I dont know anything about meds for colitis but I guess it cannot be cured

[[Mo...]]

It's 3:45 am. Awake for hours. Feeling panicky. Need to reach out to you. Docotr has me on B12 - methyl. It helps lift depression which has had me suicidal but it revs up symptoms - swinging from near panic to disorientation.

 

I'm so scared. Lonely, can't stand this. don't want to wake husband in other room. He will pat my hand and go back to sleep. I will stll be alone and frightened. I just have to tell someone or else I will go mad. Maybe I am going insane. Please help.

 

MirandaJane

 

Hey Miranda...

 

First of all : you're NOT going insane. I think many have been at that point where they thought they would lose it. Please, try and tell yourself that this is your BRAIN trying to find a balance. And that it's not your mind. You're not going nuts , your body is trying to make sense of this mess and it's fling in any direction .

It will get it right some time and you'll have a window.

I understand it's scary. I've spend many a night in that state of being fearful.

 

Have you read " What's happening in your brain" by a buddie named Parker ?

 

Let me quote a piece for you here :

 

BRAIN STRUCTURES

- amygdala  - This is the FEAR center in the brain. It's a tiny part in the middle of your brain. Fear is protective and it's GREAT if you need to assess something that is dangerous and to ACT  - like if a rabid dog were chasing you. - but it's hard in recoveyr when it's all you feel for months! But the FEAR is not truly in your MIND. It's in your BRAIN.  There is too much glutamate acting here in the amygdala and not enough GABA. So the nerves are firing off in the fear center when nothing scary is really there in your environment.  It is normal for that to happen given the circumstance physiologically. But it feels awful, doesn't it?  I know.  But it's just a brain structure. This can account for fear, agoraphobia, fear of water, fear of anything.  It's not that you're really "scared" of the moon - it's that you're in almost constant fear because this brain structure is healing. The glutamate is pruning back. The GABA receptors are opening back up.  It may or may not continue for awhile. It will abate. Then come back. But eventually, the brain will get it right. 

~ Parker

 

It's very challenging for our loved ones to understand what's going on. And I know the feeling is so super lonely. On top of that, the Valium can make use feel disconnected from everything and make us feel even more alone.

But please KNOW you're not alone even though it feels like it.

 

My heart goes out to you. Maybe it helps to know that lots and lots of people here have been , or are , in the exact same damn boat and that it passes, okay?

Hold on till then...you're on your way..

 

All you got to do today is tell yourself you can do this one more day. And then you tell yourself the same tomorrow. And then...you'll eventually arrive in a better place. It does happen. It really does.

I never thought so either but it did. Have faith !

If you can't feel or believ it now, keep reading success stories on these boards.

 

[[Mo...]]

  Miranda,  Just wanted to reach out and hold your hand, I know how terrifying and depressing this whole thing is.  Try to deep breathe or listen to some music, whatever can help calm you.  Have you just made a cut that is bringing on this wave?  I also just made a cut and felt it starting Sunday.  Yesterday was the worst, depression, anxiety, crying, tinnitus terrible, tongue burning etc. etc. all ramped up.  I got very upset but this morning it seems to have settled some.  I hope you can find a way to calm down and just hold on to the thought that its the pills, not you, and you will feel better.  Hugs and hope it passes soon.  I'm going for MRI today and I'm going to be a mess but I refused extra meds etc.  I really am claustro but I will just have to push through and do it.  Pray for me and I will pray for you.

 

Good luck with the MRI today. I'll be thinking of you.

It helps to wear earplugs .

Or maybe keep talking to the tech.

[[Mi...]]

Thank you Benzogirl, freeme, and Moddle. I'm still a mess.

 

I know it's the B12 making me so much worse. I see my psychologist tomorrow and this is going to blow his whole plan  - I have a defective MTHFR gene that affects neurotransmitter production and his plan is to start with methyl B-12, then lithium, then progesterone and maybe low-dose naltexone. The key is the B-12, he says. But that's what has ruined me this week - revving up my withdrawal symptoms. He is a good guy and had hoped this new plan would enable me to withdraw faster. I'm going so slow now - just .05 mg. valium per night -  it will take me 2-3 years. I'm at about 15 mg. valium and .16 Ativan. I know I will have to go even slower eventually. And I will still have the MTHFR gene to deal with.

 

The B-12 did help with the depression but has made fear, anxiety and disorientation so much worse. But I don't want to go back to thinking about wishing I would die every minute of the day. If my loved ones don't understand, and my sisters are too busy to help or even read up on benzo withdrawal, then who cares if I live or die? I certainly don't. I just don't have a good way to do it.

 

Yes, I've read what's happening in your brain, Moodle. And the Benzo Book. But knowing all that somehow doesn't stop the sheer panic, horrific nightmares if I do drift off to sleep, ,and seeing no reason to live. How can I possibly hold on for 2-3 years? Each day and night are torture.

 

I need my husband in the house during the day just so I don't go crazy. But he has to go to work. I'm trying to hire a caregiver but can't find any one. I don't know how I will get through today or tomorrow.

 

I lie in bed and try to relax but my mind can't focus - I just see horrific images. Am I hallucinating? I turn on music but can't focus on it either. Just the images, the terror.

 

Thank you for telling me I'm not alone. It's all I have to hang on to.

 

freeme - I hope your MRI goes well. I will pray for you.

 

MirandaJane

 

 

[[be...]]

Bets,

thank you. I am soo down and messed up :'( The Diazepam is hellish so I am going back to

Roche Klonopin I am not happy about it because it doesn't work as it used to. When they

gave it to me first time it was great. It didnt make me high,just normal and able to eat and sleep

and function. But now its not that great. I guess it still works somehow but I am lazy and depressed on it. I guess that's normal on benzos

Now I have diarrhea on top of everything and I got message that my son wants to talk to me

but I am just mental mess :'(

I dont know anything about meds for colitis but I guess it cannot be cured

 

Hey Kitten:

 

I know that Valium has been horrific for you. Mine doesn't bother me but I am taking the Teva brand. I'm also taking K Teva. I know of one person who had major troubles with K, V and Librium. She also had/has medical conditions. She kept C/Oing over many times in a short period of time. I think that upset her apple cart. She used to post like crazy every day, but I see she hasn't posted since Aug 4th. Maybe she is just lurking. You might want to PM her, tho your situations aren't actually the same. Her name is Mozart8181. I hope you feel better, soon. I keep praying for you every night.

[[jj...]]

Miranda, B12 revs me up too, I get a lot more anxious when I take it. If it's an important part of your doctor's plan though, maybe you could try cutting it up and just starting out with a tiny bit and slowly building up until you are at the full dose. This is how smiff did it and I would do it myself if I were a little more patient. I used up all of my patience for my slow taper  and now I'm just going to wait until I'm feeling totally healed before getting fully back on the supplement train.