Valium/Diazepam Support Group

[[Mo...]]

I need your help everyone. The Valium taper is the best I've got. I know fever is on its list of "serious" or "severe" side effects. I get flu-like too and that could be the V or withdrawals.  Like today out of nowhere, I can't eat (only had a banana today), got diarrhea, have a VERY dry mouth, dizzy, big fatigue, shaky, Is that withdrawal symptoms? Also clammy palms.

 

Anyway if anyone could tell me if it is SAFE to continue my taper with a (lower grade which goes up some when I leave house and I feel so ill) fever and feeling flu-like when I have to go somewhere, I would want to continue the Valium. If it weren't for the fever, I would want to stay on it without question.

 

I need to know if it's safe to do so. I really don't want to go back to klonopin (and xanax). Tell me what you all would do.

 

Years ago I was in the one percentile of those who got fever from Wellbutrin. Doctor at that time took me off.

 

This is a dilemma about which I am frightened.

 

Thank you for any help you can give.

Mo

 

All I can tell you is that I have had all these symptoms too at some point. Dizzy, Fatique , shaky, sweaty palms... The whole works.

 

I don't think anyone here would say it's safe to continue a taper off any kind of meds with surety .

We all respond differently to medicine. If your fever keeps running like this I'd go back to my doctor again. Don't you have an appointment with an infectious disease doc?

If you had the same reaction to other meds it could be that. I can't tell you, Mo.

 

[[Sn...]]

I need your help everyone. The Valium taper is the best I've got. I know fever is on its list of "serious" or "severe" side effects. I get flu-like too and that could be the V or withdrawals.  Like today out of nowhere, I can't eat (only had a banana today), got diarrhea, have a VERY dry mouth, dizzy, big fatigue, shaky, Is that withdrawal symptoms? Also clammy palms.

 

Anyway if anyone could tell me if it is SAFE to continue my taper with a (lower grade which goes up some when I leave house and I feel so ill) fever and feeling flu-like when I have to go somewhere, I would want to continue the Valium. If it weren't for the fever, I would want to stay on it without question.

 

I need to know if it's safe to do so. I really don't want to go back to klonopin (and xanax). Tell me what you all would do.

 

Years ago I was in the one percentile of those who got fever from Wellbutrin. Doctor at that time took me off.

 

This is a dilemma about which I am frightened.

 

Thank you for any help you can give.

Mo

 

I feel like I have a mild flu 24 hours a day. This 100% started when I started tapering. I also told you I regularly run a low-grade fever, but you felt it wasn't as high as yours.

 

If you are asking if the symptoms you describe accompany Valium withdrawal, then in my experience I would say that, yes, unequivocally, they do. But that's just my experience.

 

I hope that helps answer your question, Mo.

 

Snow

[[mr...]]

I need your help everyone. The Valium taper is the best I've got. I know fever is on its list of "serious" or "severe" side effects. I get flu-like too and that could be the V or withdrawals.  Like today out of nowhere, I can't eat (only had a banana today), got diarrhea, have a VERY dry mouth, dizzy, big fatigue, shaky, Is that withdrawal symptoms? Also clammy palms.

 

Anyway if anyone could tell me if it is SAFE to continue my taper with a (lower grade which goes up some when I leave house and I feel so ill) fever and feeling flu-like when I have to go somewhere, I would want to continue the Valium. If it weren't for the fever, I would want to stay on it without question.

 

I need to know if it's safe to do so. I really don't want to go back to klonopin (and xanax). Tell me what you all would do.

 

Years ago I was in the one percentile of those who got fever from Wellbutrin. Doctor at that time took me off.

 

This is a dilemma about which I am frightened.

 

Thank you for any help you can give.

Mo

Hi Moz,

Do you have a history of gallstones?

[[Mo...]]

Thank you. Bad chills and weird dry mouth feeling. I am drinking plenty. Yes Moo, going to ID doctor Tuesday morning. I don't want to tell him fever is on the list of Valium as it may taint how thorough he is in trying to find the cause. If he rules out all else then I'll tell him and ask if it's safe to continue taper.

Snow, how long did your low-grade fever last? Months? Wondering. What's the highest it went?

I go from normal (infrequently) to 101. Usually around 99.5 to 100.8

Mrt my gallbladder was removed in 1993.

 

Hugs to you all. Please tell me about this dry mouth feeling (please don't scare me. I am terrified of everything) out of nowhere today that won't go away!

[Guest [An...]]

I'm still having HORRIBLE Benzo Brain! I was out to dinner tonight and when I opened my purse to get out my wallet me lady products spilled out all over the floor in front of everyone .

 

Yeah...that's always a winner 

Like when i went to the bathroom and tugged my skirt into my skirt instead of my blouse.

My behind was showing and I had no clue. In a restaurant.

 

Hey, at least we are able to go to a restaurant 

 

 

 

Hi Moodie, So you gave them all a free shoe I have done the tuck the skirt into my underwear thing.

[[Mo...]]

I'm still having HORRIBLE Benzo Brain! I was out to dinner tonight and when I opened my purse to get out my wallet me lady products spilled out all over the floor in front of everyone .

 

Yeah...that's always a winner 

Like when i went to the bathroom and tugged my skirt into my skirt instead of my blouse.

My behind was showing and I had no clue. In a restaurant.

 

Hey, at least we are able to go to a restaurant 

 

 

 

Hi Moodie, So you gave them all a free shoe I have done the tuck the skirt into my underwear thing.

 

I guess I did, yup... Sorry for anyone who had to see that disaster .

I also have done the thing with the machine that has the towels in them. Not th paper one but the cloth ones where it just rolls up back into the machine .

It apparently was broken and it was around my ankles and I walked out of the restrooms with the whole thing around my foot and went flat on my face.

 

WHO DOESNT NOTICE THAT?

Really?

[[dp...]]

Thank you. Bad chills and weird dry mouth feeling. I am drinking plenty. Yes Moo, going to ID doctor Tuesday morning. I don't want to tell him fever is on the list of Valium as it may taint how thorough he is in trying to find the cause. If he rules out all else then I'll tell him and ask if it's safe to continue taper.

Snow, how long did your low-grade fever last? Months? Wondering. What's the highest it went?

I go from normal (infrequently) to 101. Usually around 99.5 to 100.8

Mrt my gallbladder was removed in 1993.

 

Hugs to you all. Please tell me about this dry mouth feeling (please don't scare me. I am terrified of everything) out of nowhere today that won't go away!

 

I too have the dry mouth feeling and I hate it... am drinking plenty of water also.. not sure why it's there but it is and I've read about it being a symptom.

[[Mo...]]

Thank you. Bad chills and weird dry mouth feeling. I am drinking plenty. Yes Moo, going to ID doctor Tuesday morning. I don't want to tell him fever is on the list of Valium as it may taint how thorough he is in trying to find the cause. If he rules out all else then I'll tell him and ask if it's safe to continue taper.

Snow, how long did your low-grade fever last? Months? Wondering. What's the highest it went?

I go from normal (infrequently) to 101. Usually around 99.5 to 100.8

Mrt my gallbladder was removed in 1993.

 

Hugs to you all. Please tell me about this dry mouth feeling (please don't scare me. I am terrified of everything) out of nowhere today that won't go away!

 

I too have the dry mouth feeling and I hate it... am drinking plenty of water also.. not sure why it's there but it is and I've read about it being a symptom.

 

Now that I think of it... Someone recently started a thread on this and there were lots of tips if I recall correctly. Maybe search Dry Mouth here.

 

How iz you, D? Any kayaking today?

[[Mo...]]

Here some links and tips for dry mouth during wd.

According to some posts it is mentioned int he Ashton manual as an xs.

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=11856.msg162216#msg162216

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=27130.msg408623#msg408623

 

 

[[by...]]

 

 

Hugs to you all. Please tell me about this dry mouth feeling (please don't scare me. I am terrified of everything) out of nowhere today that won't go away!

 

Dry mouth can be a sequelae (result) of anxiety.

 

Anxiety releases adrenalin. Adrenalin can cause dry mouth.

[[Mo...]]

Thanks for the links Moo.

My mouth isn't even dry, although it came on suddenly as dry yesterday for a bit, but it's more like a weird insatiable thirsty feeling that isn't real.

[[ar...]]

Hi Mozart,

 

As hard as I try to do a daily symptom taper I can't quite hit that 100% feeling good all of the time.  I have symptoms no matter what but if they get too intense I either hold or slow down.  I try to keep the taper rate with how my body reacts to the cuts mainly.  I am still functional and able to do some exercise but I am not symptom free.  I feel decent most of the time lately as I think I found a good rate but that is subject to change.

 

I am a short time user that got stuck in a long taper.  It's a long story that involved a lot of mis-informed doctors in my hometown.  I basically figured this out by myself and found a very good Benzo-wise doctor to help me.  I am also very sensitive to medications and this is another reason why I think I got stuck in this long taper.  Even if I tried to rapid taper as a short time user my physical symptoms were unbearable, so I decided to listen to my body and taper this way.  I think genetics plays a big role also.  My sensitivity to meds came from my mother.  I guess all I can say is listen to your body and you'll find the right taper rate.

 

I can summarize my benzo hell really quick if anyone is interested:

 

Developed esophagitis and could not sleep because of the pain.

Prescribed alprazolam for a few weeks for sleep and took .125 to .25.  Developed dependency and withdrawals started.

Had an endoscopy done to check my esophagus. They used Versed to knock me out.  Versed is a benzo!  Made my w/d worse!

Spent 2 months of tests and a lot of money trying to figure out what was wrong with me.  Not one doctor could figure out it was benzo w/d.

Went to ER because I could not sleep for 4 days because of myclonic jerks from w/d.  They gave me 1 dose of Ativan.  My physical symptoms were hell.

I finally figured out what was going on and started a taper from 8mg Valium.

 

I was an athlete with no health issues and no history of depression or anxiety.  Benzos are temporarily sidelining me and I am trying to get myself back to the the way I was.  I can truly say that I am a stronger mentally and physically from this.  Anyway, I'll save the rest for my success story someday.

 

[[be...]]

Hi Mozart:

 

I am truly sorry that I didn't get back to you yesterday because it was an off fun day for me. I've read through your posts and they vary, but since I am on both K and V I think I might help, or question. First let's address the issue of dry mouth. I have had a bad case of it for a year or more so I have to take the water bottle with me everywhere, even to church. It's an annoyance I have learned to accept.  But I believe it's the Seroquel I am taking, and not the Valium, tho I can't be sure as I started taking them at the same time. I really never read posts where people complained of dry mouth from valium, but of course I can't read every single post so maybe I missed one. I never experienced dry mouth while only on K. So if you are planning to switch back to K, that problem should go away. But bye bye val seems to be an expert on Valium, so you should accept the answer about dry mouth from him.

 

I think you are still unsure if you want to C/O back to just K. If you have to do it all at once, then this would be my suggestion. Take .5 mg of K in the morning, and .5 mg at night. You will have updosed by about 3 mg of valium, but that shouldn't really be an issue. I would avoid any more xanax until your body is rid of the Valium. That might take a few weeks. K kicks in faster than the V will leave you body, so you might feel sedation for a while. But that will pass. Many people get sick while on Valium: that's because it is a very messy drug. But I will give you fair warning like some have done here: If the K stopped working for you before, then it might not work for you again. This is a risk you have to take. If this is the case, then you have a conundrum about which benzo to take. You can't take Librium, Kpin or Valium, so that rules out any long lasting drug. What to do about that I am not sure. If it were me, I would not switch over the a short acting drugs like Xanax or Ativan. Since you are already tolerant to benzos, my guess is that you will quickly become tolerant to any other benzo. People have tapered directly off their Ativan or Xanax, but they stuck with that particular benzo and most of them did not get off Scott-free. You say you definitely can't take any more valium or Librium, so that leaves just K. If the K doesn't work for you, than taking a Xanax to help with I/D W/D will quickly become a habit. Then you are stuck and have to taper off two benzos: both of them nasty ones.

 

Well, at least you are off your oxycodone. That makes things simpler. I do understand that you wish to be back on both K and Xanax, as that helps you and stops the bad dreams. But that's all they are: dreams. You've been on benzos for a very long period of time. But you can and will be able to get off the. After all, they ruined your singing career and much of your life. Do you really want to remain this way? I had been following one poster here a while ago who was on Valium for 40 years. She managed to get off it, and so shall you if you make a decision and stick with it. I know you keep repeating whether it is worth it or not. Yes it is. Please refrain about talking to want to end it all. It can upset many people here who are now super sensitive. Plus it is against the rules and guidelines of this forum. This online forum cannot be on ground help. If you feel you are about to take action on this, then get a friend to come over and talk you through it or perhaps, take you to the ER. There is also a suicide helpline.

 

Back to your benzos. If you are really scared about both V and K, then why not take a chance and take half of V and half of K and see what happens? Anxiety and depression are very common in withdrawal. Especially valium with depression. I am sure your PTSD is not helping you at all. For that, I am sorry. You would not be here unless you wanted off the drug. I believe that people can be sensitive to all benzos, that's why so many here want off. Because they are making them sick. But you seem to be able to tolerant Xanax and kpin, so maybe this isn't your issue. Tolerance withdrawal is not fun. You might get this way if the kpin doesn't work for you. But you won't know until you try. So if you want to do a direct C/O from V to K, then I will repeat. Stop your valium and then take .5 mg of kpin in the am and .5 mg at night. Please keep up posted on how you are doing. I will make sure to keep track of your posts. Hang in there sweetie; You have already gone down from 1.5 mg of K to just 1 mg. Maybe the lower the dose, the better you will feel. I know first hand that K hasn't not worked for me for years: hence bad insomnia. But when I got lower than .5 mg of kpin, my sleep has returned. So less is better for me. Other than a bout of fatigue that comes every nine days or so, I just feel great. You will too!!!

 

I really like River's earlier comment: "This is an unforgiving taper."

 

Hey Anony: I don't know if you read my earlier post to you, but if you didn't, can I call you mouse?  If so, be wary of my two cats.....Also, these are two things that happened to be that were embarrassing. First my pdoc only accepts cash or checks. I've been seeing him for a long time so I should know the routine. Two weeks ago when I visited him I gave him my credit card. Also, in my earlier, pre-benzo days, I was a newbie employee at IBM Corp. HQ. I very fancy dansy outfit. I was expected to attend a party so I could introduce myself to the higher ups. So that's what I did. But they all looked at me kind of strangely so I thought it was just me, being a newbie that they didn't have time for. An hour later my manager pulled me aside and told me that a had a bunch of wet toilet paper trailing down the back of my skirt. How embarrassing! I quickly back stepped back to the bathroom and then headed home like the wind. And since it was pre benzo days and I was not on any medication, I feel I have virtual benzo brain.

 

Basha: If you get a refill every 30 days, then the liquid valium should not be an issue. That's what I plan to do. Order Roxanne 5 mg = 5 ml. For a total of 300 ml per month. My insurance co said that this is the only liquid Valium available, but then again, I don't trust them a lick.

 

Hey there Snow: I am equally very happy that you are here too: But I wish none of us has to be here. :'( Like old friends getting back together only because a good mutual friend has died. I am sorry that you have a mild flu 24 hours a day. That must be quite a bummer and I am sorry for that. Can I ask, other than your temp, what symptoms do you have? Even with that flu, try and have a terrific day!!!!!

 

Hey Tex: I will take your advice about coffee in consideration. But I already have to pee every hour on the hour!

 

Moo my friend: I have heard that the west coast is suffering terribly with bad heat and of course, no rain again. I wish they could find a way to pipeline excess water from other states to the west coast. After all we made it to the moon? Why should this be so difficult? Just make sure to hydrate. And yes to your question: I go out every single day. I guess I have been lucky so far. At first, I had that dreadful insomnia and was truly a pain in the neck. But other than that, I have not suffered at all. Until I reached .625 mg K via a cut and hold. Then I had a bad case of the benzo flu but that went away since I began a dry micro taper. This is such a relief compared to cut and hold. I do have to take care of my sick mom, as she is kind of frail and cannot drive. But she was with me as a baby and growing up all the way, so shouldn't it be my obligation to return the favor? The only problem I have now is a bout of fatigue that happens every nine days or so. Still it's new so I haven't figured out the pattern, but on those days I stay home because I am afraid I will fall asleep at the wheel. Other than that I am a freebird! I wish everyone else here could be this way. But I have no illusions that this will remain. I expect the shoe to drop any day now. I hope you are having a good day today! It finally stopped raining here and it is sunny and only 78 degrees outside, so I shall be out for most of the day. And of course, my daily trip to the Y. Ugh on that score. It's getting to be quite a bore. But I can't go tomorrow as it is my pdoc day.

 

Arcade: Good to see you are doing well. That's great news indeed. I earlier read your sig and I thought you were just down to .02 ml a day, so I thought maybe you were about to jump. Sorry about that mistake. How much are you on anyway? And please, feel free to call me Bets, ok?

 

can do: Are you still lurking here?

 

healingme: I miss you here. Lots.

 

I hope I did not miss anyone here. I hope everybody has a great day!

Bets

[[lo...]]

Hello all

 

Just a general question for all those who crossed over from Ativan to Valium. 

 

I attempted to cross over from 0.40mg of A to 4mg of V but apparently for me, 4mg was not enough.  I've had to updose some in an attempt to reach some stability.  I believe now I rushed my crossover .

 

I've gone to 5.5mg V then 6, now 7 and still no relief.  I feel only slightly better than when I was suffering horrible wd s/x back when I was tapering the Ativan.

 

I feel as though I may be feeling worse the higher my V dose gets.  But I'm not getting any relief whatsoever, and my benzo therapist and pdoc are saying I need to updose higher, up to 8mg V.

 

I'm very hesitant to do so as I feel I'm just digging my grave to go higher.

 

I've been taking Valium for just under 8 weeks now.  I've been off Ativan completely for 18 days and on V only for the same 18 days.

 

My therapist asked me if I was feeling tired, or a little sedated from the Valium yet.  I have not yet felt any sedating effects from the Valium.  I'm still very anxious and panicky and quite paranoid all day long.  I do tend to calm down some when the evening hours arrive and I'm sleeping good, but I believe that is due to the Remeron and Lyrica I take at 7pm

 

* My question is:  has anyone gotten worse as their dose of V was increased trying to reach a stable state ?

 

Could some of you experienced BB's please give me feedback on the possibility that my body may be rejecting the V, or that I should just hold where I am now at 7mg and let the V build up.  I'll admit, I'm freaking out quite a bit.

 

How long should it usually take to expect some relief from my 7mg V dose considering 4mg V was the equivalent to my prior dose of A.

 

I'm still in need of some good advice and suggestions.  I'm a smoker too, and I've read that that may be working against me.

 

Any responses would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you

[[mr...]]

Hello all

 

Just a general question for all those who crossed over from Ativan to Valium. 

 

I attempted to cross over from 0.40mg of A to 4mg of V but apparently for me, 4mg was not enough.  I've had to updose some in an attempt to reach some stability.  I believe now I rushed my crossover .

 

I've gone to 5.5mg V then 6, now 7 and still no relief.  I feel only slightly better than when I was suffering horrible wd s/x back when I was tapering the Ativan.

 

I feel as though I may be feeling worse the higher my V dose gets.  But I'm not getting any relief whatsoever, and my benzo therapist and pdoc are saying I need to updose higher, up to 8mg V.

 

I'm very hesitant to do so as I feel I'm just digging my grave to go higher.

 

I've been taking Valium for just under 8 weeks now.  I've been off Ativan completely for 18 days and on V only for the same 18 days.

 

My therapist asked me if I was feeling tired, or a little sedated from the Valium yet.  I have not yet felt any sedating effects from the Valium.  I'm still very anxious and panicky and quite paranoid all day long.  I do tend to calm down some when the evening hours arrive and I'm sleeping good, but I believe that is due to the Remeron and Lyrica I take at 7pm

 

* My question is:  has anyone gotten worse as their dose of V was increased trying to reach a stable state ?

 

Could some of you experienced BB's please give me feedback on the possibility that my body may be rejecting the V, or that I should just hold where I am now at 7mg and let the V build up.  I'll admit, I'm freaking out quite a bit.

 

How long should it usually take to expect some relief from my 7mg V dose considering 4mg V was the equivalent to my prior dose of A.

 

I'm still in need of some good advice and suggestions.  I'm a smoker too, and I've read that that may be working against me.

 

Any responses would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you

 

Hi lostin,

It is important during a cross over to be stable before introducing the valium.

Direct crossing can be very tramatic, so many like to transition slowly over to the valium.

If you were not stable when you switched to valium, then upping your dose will not help you.

If you know at what dose of ativan you were on when stable, this might be the dose to convert to the valium and hold until stable.

Hope this helps.

[[Mo...]]

 

 

Moo my friend: I have heard that the west coast is suffering terribly with bad heat and of course, no rain again. I wish they could find a way to pipeline excess water from other states to the west coast. After all we made it to the moon? Why should this be so difficult? Just make sure to hydrate. And yes to your question: I go out every single day. I guess I have been lucky so far. At first, I had that dreadful insomnia and was truly a pain in the neck. But other than that, I have not suffered at all. Until I reached .625 mg K via a cut and hold. Then I had a bad case of the benzo flu but that went away since I began a dry micro taper. This is such a relief compared to cut and hold. I do have to take care of my sick mom, as she is kind of frail and cannot drive. But she was with me as a baby and growing up all the way, so shouldn't it be my obligation to return the favor? The only problem I have now is a bout of fatigue that happens every nine days or so. Still it's new so I haven't figured out the pattern, but on those days I stay home because I am afraid I will fall asleep at the wheel. Other than that I am a freebird! I wish everyone else here could be this way. But I have no illusions that this will remain. I expect the shoe to drop any day now. I hope you are having a good day today! It finally stopped raining here and it is sunny and only 78 degrees outside, so I shall be out for most of the day. And of course, my daily trip to the Y. Ugh on that score. It's getting to be quite a bore. But I can't go tomorrow as it is my pdoc day.

 

I know Bets, it's so dry here. All the lawns are brown, the hills are brown. Looking like something from a sci fi movie.

Everyone tries to save water as much as possible.

There are some reservoirs around here that have all dried up. The deer and other wildlife are coming closer to the houses, looking for water .

 

I had a pattern for a while too but that got lost. Now it's just kind of waiting stuff out and just trying to believe and remember it will pass again. My waves seem to be shorter. It seems to be more often but not as severe.

 

Maybe you don't need to expect the other shoe to drop. Maybe this is just what it is like for you, also when you're doing with K in a month or two. I think it could really be helpful for the Valium taper to keep going the same way and just assume , mindset, that this is tapering for you. If we wait for crap to happen, it will probably happen?

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that your taper will stay like this.

 

I think it's wonderful that you have the opportunity to take care of your mom like this. You ARE returning the favor. I'm sure it's not always easy, though...

 

How is your insomnia now?

 

You don't like going to the Y?

 

I hope you'll have a nice day, too.

 

Thanks for your post.

[[Mo...]]

Hello all

 

Just a general question for all those who crossed over from Ativan to Valium. 

 

I attempted to cross over from 0.40mg of A to 4mg of V but apparently for me, 4mg was not enough.  I've had to updose some in an attempt to reach some stability.  I believe now I rushed my crossover .

 

I've gone to 5.5mg V then 6, now 7 and still no relief.  I feel only slightly better than when I was suffering horrible wd s/x back when I was tapering the Ativan.

 

I feel as though I may be feeling worse the higher my V dose gets.  But I'm not getting any relief whatsoever, and my benzo therapist and pdoc are saying I need to updose higher, up to 8mg V.

 

I'm very hesitant to do so as I feel I'm just digging my grave to go higher.

 

I've been taking Valium for just under 8 weeks now.  I've been off Ativan completely for 18 days and on V only for the same 18 days.

 

My therapist asked me if I was feeling tired, or a little sedated from the Valium yet.  I have not yet felt any sedating effects from the Valium.  I'm still very anxious and panicky and quite paranoid all day long.  I do tend to calm down some when the evening hours arrive and I'm sleeping good, but I believe that is due to the Remeron and Lyrica I take at 7pm

 

* My question is:  has anyone gotten worse as their dose of V was increased trying to reach a stable state ?

 

Could some of you experienced BB's please give me feedback on the possibility that my body may be rejecting the V, or that I should just hold where I am now at 7mg and let the V build up.  I'll admit, I'm freaking out quite a bit.

 

How long should it usually take to expect some relief from my 7mg V dose considering 4mg V was the equivalent to my prior dose of A.

 

I'm still in need of some good advice and suggestions.  I'm a smoker too, and I've read that that may be working against me.

 

Any responses would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you

 

Hi lostin,

It is important during a cross over to be stable before introducing the valium.

Direct crossing can be very tramatic, so many like to transition slowly over to the valium.

If you were not stable when you switched to valium, then upping your dose will not help you.

If you know at what dose of ativan you were on when stable, this might be the dose to convert to the valium and hold until stable.

Hope this helps.

 

Lost, I agree...

In a matter of weeks you've up dosed to almost double your benzo intake. And you don't feel better from it. What goes up must come down and I'd hate to see you stuck on a higher dose even , while that may not even work.

Uprising doesn't always work well and IMO you would stay put here till you start to get out of the ruts.

It's not been that long since you stopped Ativan entirely and I think your body is adjusting. Maybe upping or downing the dose is only more confusing and riding it out till you feel better would be a better option IMO.

 

[[ca...]]

Hi Mozart:

 

I am truly sorry that I didn't get back to you yesterday because it was an off fun day for me. I've read through your posts and they vary, but since I am on both K and V I think I might help, or question. First let's address the issue of dry mouth. I have had a bad case of it for a year or more so I have to take the water bottle with me everywhere, even to church. It's an annoyance I have learned to accept.  But I believe it's the Seroquel I am taking, and not the Valium, tho I can't be sure as I started taking them at the same time. I really never read posts where people complained of dry mouth from valium, but of course I can't read every single post so maybe I missed one. I never experienced dry mouth while only on K. So if you are planning to switch back to K, that problem should go away. But bye bye val seems to be an expert on Valium, so you should accept the answer about dry mouth from him.

 

I think you are still unsure if you want to C/O back to just K. If you have to do it all at once, then this would be my suggestion. Take .5 mg of K in the morning, and .5 mg at night. You will have updosed by about 3 mg of valium, but that shouldn't really be an issue. I would avoid any more xanax until your body is rid of the Valium. That might take a few weeks. K kicks in faster than the V will leave you body, so you might feel sedation for a while. But that will pass. Many people get sick while on Valium: that's because it is a very messy drug. But I will give you fair warning like some have done here: If the K stopped working for you before, then it might not work for you again. This is a risk you have to take. If this is the case, then you have a conundrum about which benzo to take. You can't take Librium, Kpin or Valium, so that rules out any long lasting drug. What to do about that I am not sure. If it were me, I would not switch over the a short acting drugs like Xanax or Ativan. Since you are already tolerant to benzos, my guess is that you will quickly become tolerant to any other benzo. People have tapered directly off their Ativan or Xanax, but they stuck with that particular benzo and most of them did not get off Scott-free. You say you definitely can't take any more valium or Librium, so that leaves just K. If the K doesn't work for you, than taking a Xanax to help with I/D W/D will quickly become a habit. Then you are stuck and have to taper off two benzos: both of them nasty ones.

 

Well, at least you are off your oxycodone. That makes things simpler. I do understand that you wish to be back on both K and Xanax, as that helps you and stops the bad dreams. But that's all they are: dreams. You've been on benzos for a very long period of time. But you can and will be able to get off the. After all, they ruined your singing career and much of your life. Do you really want to remain this way? I had been following one poster here a while ago who was on Valium for 40 years. She managed to get off it, and so shall you if you make a decision and stick with it. I know you keep repeating whether it is worth it or not. Yes it is. Please refrain about talking to want to end it all. It can upset many people here who are now super sensitive. Plus it is against the rules and guidelines of this forum. This online forum cannot be on ground help. If you feel you are about to take action on this, then get a friend to come over and talk you through it or perhaps, take you to the ER. There is also a suicide helpline.

 

Back to your benzos. If you are really scared about both V and K, then why not take a chance and take half of V and half of K and see what happens? Anxiety and depression are very common in withdrawal. Especially valium with depression. I am sure your PTSD is not helping you at all. For that, I am sorry. You would not be here unless you wanted off the drug. I believe that people can be sensitive to all benzos, that's why so many here want off. Because they are making them sick. But you seem to be able to tolerant Xanax and kpin, so maybe this isn't your issue. Tolerance withdrawal is not fun. You might get this way if the kpin doesn't work for you. But you won't know until you try. So if you want to do a direct C/O from V to K, then I will repeat. Stop your valium and then take .5 mg of kpin in the am and .5 mg at night. Please keep up posted on how you are doing. I will make sure to keep track of your posts. Hang in there sweetie; You have already gone down from 1.5 mg of K to just 1 mg. Maybe the lower the dose, the better you will feel. I know first hand that K hasn't not worked for me for years: hence bad insomnia. But when I got lower than .5 mg of kpin, my sleep has returned. So less is better for me. Other than a bout of fatigue that comes every nine days or so, I just feel great. You will too!!!

 

I really like River's earlier comment: "This is an unforgiving taper."

 

Hey Anony: I don't know if you read my earlier post to you, but if you didn't, can I call you mouse?  If so, be wary of my two cats.....Also, these are two things that happened to be that were embarrassing. First my pdoc only accepts cash or checks. I've been seeing him for a long time so I should know the routine. Two weeks ago when I visited him I gave him my credit card. Also, in my earlier, pre-benzo days, I was a newbie employee at IBM Corp. HQ. I very fancy dansy outfit. I was expected to attend a party so I could introduce myself to the higher ups. So that's what I did. But they all looked at me kind of strangely so I thought it was just me, being a newbie that they didn't have time for. An hour later my manager pulled me aside and told me that a had a bunch of wet toilet paper trailing down the back of my skirt. How embarrassing! I quickly back stepped back to the bathroom and then headed home like the wind. And since it was pre benzo days and I was not on any medication, I feel I have virtual benzo brain.

 

Basha: If you get a refill every 30 days, then the liquid valium should not be an issue. That's what I plan to do. Order Roxanne 5 mg = 5 ml. For a total of 300 ml per month. My insurance co said that this is the only liquid Valium available, but then again, I don't trust them a lick.

 

Hey there Snow: I am equally very happy that you are here too: But I wish none of us has to be here. :'( Like old friends getting back together only because a good mutual friend has died. I am sorry that you have a mild flu 24 hours a day. That must be quite a bummer and I am sorry for that. Can I ask, other than your temp, what symptoms do you have? Even with that flu, try and have a terrific day!!!!!

 

Hey Tex: I will take your advice about coffee in consideration. But I already have to pee every hour on the hour!

 

Moo my friend: I have heard that the west coast is suffering terribly with bad heat and of course, no rain again. I wish they could find a way to pipeline excess water from other states to the west coast. After all we made it to the moon? Why should this be so difficult? Just make sure to hydrate. And yes to your question: I go out every single day. I guess I have been lucky so far. At first, I had that dreadful insomnia and was truly a pain in the neck. But other than that, I have not suffered at all. Until I reached .625 mg K via a cut and hold. Then I had a bad case of the benzo flu but that went away since I began a dry micro taper. This is such a relief compared to cut and hold. I do have to take care of my sick mom, as she is kind of frail and cannot drive. But she was with me as a baby and growing up all the way, so shouldn't it be my obligation to return the favor? The only problem I have now is a bout of fatigue that happens every nine days or so. Still it's new so I haven't figured out the pattern, but on those days I stay home because I am afraid I will fall asleep at the wheel. Other than that I am a freebird! I wish everyone else here could be this way. But I have no illusions that this will remain. I expect the shoe to drop any day now. I hope you are having a good day today! It finally stopped raining here and it is sunny and only 78 degrees outside, so I shall be out for most of the day. And of course, my daily trip to the Y. Ugh on that score. It's getting to be quite a bore. But I can't go tomorrow as it is my pdoc day.

 

Arcade: Good to see you are doing well. That's great news indeed. I earlier read your sig and I thought you were just down to .02 ml a day, so I thought maybe you were about to jump. Sorry about that mistake. How much are you on anyway? And please, feel free to call me Bets, ok?

 

can do: Are you still lurking here?

 

healingme: I miss you here. Lots.

 

I hope I did not miss anyone here. I hope everybody has a great day!

Bets

Bets, yes still lurking hope all is well ~CD

[[Mo...]]

Benzogirl. Thanks for taking the time for me. I am grateful. Benzos also saved my life in many ways, especially when younger, but not even all too long ago. I  can barely type due to so much adrenaline. I have been tapering too quickly in fear of the fever I have had almost 2 months. I strongly suspect Valium as the culprit. I go to an infectious disease doctor tomorrow to try to find the cause of daily fever. I feel some (almost all) of the same hell I felt trying to come off of K without allowing myself any Xanax since at that point I had already been off of it since late January and didn't want to go backwards. But I was in sheer utter Hell and should have taken one a day. My pdoc

doesn't know I have stuck with the Valium. He thinks I am taking .05 K twice a day (as you said) and he prescribed .05 mg Xanax for use of up to 4x day! What?! He doesn't like Xanax and I have only ever taken .25 mg strength for breakthrough with the K.

 

I hear you about leaving Xanax alone if I cross back, but I may have to use some. I may have to if I am screaming (literally) in Hell. I didn't allow any before.

 

2 psych wards (one was a 3 week trauma program in Dallas to which I flew from Oregon (shortly after c/t oxycodone) that was a nightmare. I had an untreated UTI went into delirium, BP 170/108, they didn't treat it either. They upped me to .05 K with .25 X all four times a day. Before that I only ever took .25 K. I built more of a tolerance I think. In December I went to a local psych ward for depression for 3 weeks. Stayed on .05 K on a 3x day schedule (I dropped one dose after Sept and C/T Xanax as per my shrink for 2 months). When I was on the ward in December,  I got back on .25 X a few times a day PRN with Propanolol a fewx day PRN along with the 3 K a day.

 

I had a young, eccentric shrink there who tried me on ADDERAL (I only took half of the smallest dose) for a couple of days. It was awful. When I left on December 31st something happened to me and I have never been the same again. I just "snapped". Got sick, lost my appetite, etc 2 dats before leaving.

 

I was still on K and X. In the ward I was comfortable, gregarious,  my normal self. Played piano and sang for everyone and people who wouldn't even talk would sing with me. Everyone told me how brilliant and phenomenal I was and so talented.

 

I LOST her (me)THIS YEAR. I left still on K and X, but became bedridden. Couldn't handle light, sound, people (I used to thrive on being with people), couldn't talk on the phone, etc. Pdoc didn't even c/t the Xanax until a few weeks after this (2nd time c/t xanax close to one another).

 

I have never known what happened to me. I started my K taper (I knew they turned on me. X covered some of that up and now the X was gone). I went into sheer and utter hell. I wanted to end it every day. I know I am not supposed to talk about that, but I have never acted on it. It was horrific. I did liquid titration but someone on here told me it was too fast. I had an 8 month plan. I wanted that. To me it wasn't too fast. I got scared and stopped. Bought a gram scale. Didn't know what I was doing but tried.  am almost in that same Hell now with the V. The V worked well at first I felt normal again, but couldn't wake up.

 

Now I have daily fever. I crossed over a few times while trying to get off the K, but aborted it. My intuition told me V didn't agree with me, Then I finally just succumbed to the c/o. Been strictly on V since May 12th. Was on 30 mg day. Now I take 7 mg morning and 10 mg night. Still using halves of benadryl and a little propanolol which helped me with straight K w/d have a few windows. Now nothing helps.

 

I am traumatized by the whole w/d now. If I go back to K, I will have definite tolerance. That is murder. If I stay on V, which I have (2 nights no dreams now) I HAVE to find out if it's safe enough to keep taking the V with fever. I hope the endless waves will stop since lowering the last mg.

 

My doctor friend in California just emailed me telling me he would not take a drug that gave him a fever. What am I supposed to do?

 

So that's the LONG update. I am at a deep loss. I do not think I can live out this life without benzos. The severe anxiety, adrenaline and PTSD have only ever been quelled by taking one since 1976 (or a cocktail of pills many times like serax, klonopin and benadryl). I don't see how this can work. I live in bed and in terror.

[[on...]]

Mozart, I saw your name and wanted to read your posts.  I think we both started here about the same time.  Even though you are still having serious problems, it shows by your posts that you have come so far.

 

Even in the hard days, please remember that you are doing better than you were a couple of months ago.  I can tell in your writing.  You'll get past this phase as well.

 

Keep doing a good job and take care.  I believe in you.

Paul 

[[Mo...]]

one year

 

Thank you. But my doctor friend said he wouldn't stay on a drug that gave him a fever. V is giving me fever. Where does that leave me?

[[on...]]

You're climbing the steps up the staircase even though you don't know exactly where they lead.  Keep climbing.  I believe in you.

 

Paul

[[Mo...]]

BENZOGIRL  Just to clarify you said I CAN do a direct switch with no crossover if needed right? My doctor friend emailed me and said if V is giving me this fever, which I strongly suspect, then I need off of it. You also mentioned my tolerance to K. I have that. That was torture. I don't know if that means I will need to updose K (hate to), or divide it in .25 4x day. I get interdose w/d from it and even with V. But if V is making me so ill, I have no choice. I just remember how extreme the torture was. Every day I kept telling my husband to please let me go. It was that bad. So, I may HAVE to allow a Xanax here and there, but that would give me 3 types of benzos in my system at once. But I may have to. I will try to abstain from X, and just get help from benadryl and propanolol, but I can't be in that kind of torture again. I had some windows in the evening on several days though. Does the tolerance torture ever end? How do you make cuts with tolerance? I have a gram scale and will need math help. Please reply asap. I need help. Thank you for being there. I hope you will answer all my questions. Thank you

Mo

[[Mo...]]

ANYBODY KNOW WHY THIS COULD BE HAPPENING?

My legs and feet are cold to the touch. It is 90 to 100 outside during the day. The house is at least 75 to 80 degrees inside. I AM FREEZING and can't warm up. Chills. Have been having bad diarrhea and can't eat.  It is scaring me. Thyroid normal. Iron normal. I am diabetic and mostly bedridden from w/d hell and fear. Poor circulation? Not eating? Diarrhea? C Diff from the antibiotics I was on? But this is so bizarre. I have on a swearshirt, heating pad, blankets, a hat, layers of clothes, drank hot water. Can't get rid of chills. My thermometer says I am about 99.5 not enough fever to do this.

What's going on? Anyone? I can't find one list with this as a tapering symptom.  But Valium says fever and chills is a more serious side effect of it.  Been on them since May 12 after c/o. Went back to horrible Klonopin tonight with tolerance to it. Gonna be Hell. But I was freezing before I took it. Anyone heard of this? Please don't scare me. I am in a scared space. Thank you all.

Mo

[[fr...]]

  Have you been checked for CDiff?  I had it for a long time and this is when I was put on Ativan.  CDiff is a terrible illness in that it affects anxiety and your mind so much along with the gut.  If you are having diarrhea and a fever I would suggest you get tested for it.  I hope today is a better day for you.  I got off the A and crossed over to all V but it took me about 4 or 5 months.  I was on the A for almost 4 yrs.  Now I'm down to 17.5 mg. of V from 20 mg.  I cut 1.25 mg. twice so far and had uptick of symtoms on fourth day that lasted around another 4 or 5 days.  Things have settled down now, almost 2 weeks since last cut. I will wait another week or so and go for another one.  I think you crossed over too quickly and never really stabalized on the V.  I hope you can get some answers today from the Dr.  Good luck and let us know what they say.  Probably will do a lot of tests but definitely mention the Cdiff.