Anxiety still strong...very weary and scared

[[Ga...]]

This is the beginning of my 7th mo off and I still have bad anxiety and when it hits I simply cannot be accepting and positive or believe I am really healing.  I've not had many, truly clear window days...just more tolerable ones.  I'm very weary, very wiped out.  Crying all the time.  I really thought at 6 mo I would have seen real healing.  Need some encouragement.

[[Te...]]

I know how you feel. I jumped c/t on May 26, so I'm about 6.5 months out. I was doing OK for a few days and then, wham!, a wave washed over me six days ago and I've just been hanging on.

 

I, too, thought that by six months I'd be doing better. I know I've made progress but some day, like today, it's hard for me to be very positive. All we can do is just hang in there and hope that it does get better for us. Everyone says they do get better, so I'm pretty much operating on faith and trust...

 

I hope things ease up for you soon.

 

 

[[su...]]

Hi, It was around the 6 month mark that my changes/healing started to happen.

It was a particularly nasty wave, followed by almost nothing after that.

so, you could be very close now, but we're all different, and you can't panic if it doesn't happen yet. It will at some point...

 

[[In...]]

I'm sorry you're struggling. You are not alone. I don't get windows either, just more tolerable days as you mentioned. We are probably those people who keep improving week by week, month by month so gradually it is hard to notice. So it is very easy to get frustrated and feel like no progress is being made. I am forgetting that I'm healing all the time this week . Maybe next week we'll have some good moments to reassure us that healing is still happening. No matter how we are feeling at the moment, we are always getting one day closer to being healed. 

[[Ga...]]

Thanks Innadaze., surprised1 and tex67.  Sincerely appreciate your taking a minute to reply to my need for help.  Not much better today but trying to push through.  It's so nice to hear from others, to be comforted.  Not everybody can reply or take the time.  Hoping you are all doing good today.

[[Te...]]

It's now Saturday morning (7:10 a.m.) here in the Southwest and I have been up a while. I was awakened at 3 a.m. with jolts of electric like current in my brain, which I haven't had since way back in months 1 and 2. Once awake, I was just awash in anxiety. I was able to drift off back to sleep eventually, but it was more dozing than sleeping. I've been sleeping well for the past couple of months, but ever since I hit this wave a week ago I have had a hard time getting any consistent sleep.

 

I can handle anything as long as I get enough sleep. Yesterday was horrible. I hadn't had enough sleep and my anxiety just roared all day long. It finally eased up a bit in the eveniing.

 

I will be glad when this wave has passed! I had a bad one at day 99 that lasted a bit more than 3 weeks. So far, this one seems to rival that one in intensity, which is frustrating since I'm just shy of 6.5 months out from my c/t. Oh, well, I'll get through today on hour at a time...

 

[[Ga...]]

Tex67

So sorry.  I was up at 5, very cold, -4, and dark here in the rocky mtns.  Snow on the ground.  My poor hubby sleeps in the next room...I can 't sleep with him anymore because I wake every hour and he needs to rest.  This is all very hard on him as well.  I know what you mean about sleeping.  And I can't nap, makes me sicker.  God help us to get through all this.  To have the strength to push on.

Mornings are always bad for me.  Anxiety, shakes, dread thoughts of the day facing me. 

Hope you get a nice window today.  Best wishes.

[[...]]

Hi Galea-

 

I'm sorry to hear that the intense anxiety has been bad for you. I'm n my 7th month post jump and although, last week was my best week ever (low anxiety and a clear head) last night I felt myself falling back into a wave. this morning I awoke to semi-dread and today I'm feeling like I did a couple of months ago...pretty sh**y:(

I'm repeating to myself over and over that my brain needs to regroup to heal some more.

 

I long to feel that inner calm that I used to get right before a nap. I just spoke to a friend who is lazing in bed, feeling so warm and cozy on this Saturday morning and I was sooo jealous. Haven't felt any 'coziness' in a year and a half.

 

I'll try to meditate and go for a walk today. Even though I can't feel it at the moment, I'm convinced that it will help my brain recover faster.

 

Hope you get a break today

 

Rosa

[[Te...]]

Well, I went out and walked for 119 minutes. I could barely do 20 minutes a couple of months ago. Now, I have a lot of anxiety and  usually walking helps burn it off. Not so today. I came back from my walk and I have these two really conflicting feeling of anxiety and nervousness and sadness and depression. I feel like I want to go run 100 miles, but I also feel like I want to crawl into bed and just pull the covers up over my head!

 

I'm at 6.5 months, so based on what you're going through and I'm going through, and others at about this point, I guess this is pretty normal. Great... Just freakin' great...

[[Sn...]]

Walking definitely does help.  When you get the blood circulating it hits the brain and I think helps lift the mood.  I don't do that now because I live in Wisconsin and it is too cold especially since I now have  become hypersensitive to it.

 

Also try watching movies, comedies and happy go lucky ones.  Stay away from violence and paranormal.

 

Peace and Blessings

Snufi